General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[PrettyInInk42]

Dobby - Thanks. And that's good about SO many vaxxed people. I think my province is still fighting over getting teachers vaxxed, but I know our medical people are. SO's cousin is a post natal nurse and she's all vaxxed up.
Probably gonna have to play Matthew's BDay by ear every year depending on what day on the week it and Halloween fall on. Another concern was that the boys have a 2nd cousin (whose 3 months younger than Alex) whose BDay is the day before Matthew's, but the whole family is moving to Ireland this summer, so I guess it won't be a problem.
Some kids just hold on to weight more than others. SO and I were both "solid" as kids, so I have no idea how we ended up with a slim Alex. lol. According to Matthew's percentiles at his 15m appt, he was over 99% and the NP made a phone appt for us with a dietian. We finally had that call the other day and she's like "so, what are your concerns?" and I'm like "I'm not concerned; the NP was." And then just told her we don't give him juice or sweets, only get take out like once a week and limit fried food. At the time, between winter and a small townhouse, he could only be so active. Put now that he's getting a more varied diet in daycare and the weather is getting warmer, I'm sure he'll come down a bit. She even said it looks like he was born at pretty much 99%, so she's not to concerned since his percentile is the same. He'll be 18m later this month, so we'll see what he is at that appt.

 

[DobbyForever]

Yeah exactly. I’d be more concerned if he ate like s* or wasn’t mobile/agile. But I didn’t appreciate it especially since like what would I change? We’ll see what the ped says. The men on my dad’s side are mostly built like American football players, my dad was the slim one. My ex comes from top heavy, stocky athletes as well.

watching naked and afraid and pretty sure they’re boning each other lol

 

[shaescott]

This post is so long I’m sorry, I started writing it when I got back from clinical and forgot to hit post (or fell asleep) so now it’s a combined post.

Pretty happy birthday!!!
little kids are shameless

Oh yeah, I remember you being really upset that you might miss Halloween due to his birth. I’m more of a Christmas gal myself. I hate carving pumpkins just because my hands get so sticky from the pulp and it feels so gross to me. Also because I’m terrible at it. But I love seeing jack-o-lanterns from better pumpkin artists than me lol. I like picking a costume and all that as well.

But I go all out for Christmas, this year I hung Garland wrapped in string lights around my dining room and mud room (on the the walls elevated above doorways) plus big red bows, and I put bath and body works wallflowers with fresh balsam scent around the house. The Christmas tree was in the living room, so basically every room on that floor made me think of Christmas when I entered them. It was mostly meant as an instant serotonin boost, my family gets hit with seasonal depression pretty hard. Which is probably why I was too tired to finish decorating.

I feel like the stressful thing with Christmas is planning Christmas gifts/party and a birthday gifts/party simultaneously. Although there’s not much going on in terms of parties these days.
I do hope that whenever I have a baby, it’s post-social distancing. I want more than one birth companion lol, I want SO and perhaps my mom as my doula, she’s been a doula for her best friend, plus she knows how to calm me down lol, and also I want my sister to take pics and videos. I think it would be cool to get to watch my birth on video after, even if I never ever share it with anyone.

Dobs ah, I had wondered if it was a long beak common dolphin (I did some googling). We would never see wild dolphins on a whale watch here, but we see a lot of harbor seals and they’re sooo cute. They tend to get pretty close to the boat so you can see them really well. The whale watches we go on are through the New England aquarium so they know the names and backstories of the whales that show up, they track them.

When it comes to weight, I’m a huge proponent of “look at your patient, not just the numbers”. First I think, does he look obese, or just chunky and/or broadly built? BMI does not account for muscle or bone structure, so I think it’s a crappy system. If he was eating unhealthy or had crazy high cholesterol or A1C, or was so overweight he had trouble walking normally or was getting short of breath, or was visibly obese, then yeah I’m definitely concerned. But if it’s a child who eats well and is active with no mobility issues and looks a little chunky or broadly built, then why would I care? Leave the kid alone.

Speaking of being active, I should really go to the gym today, I haven’t gone all week. Ugh I hate the process of getting there, I have such a hard time just initiating actually getting ready to go to the gym. I don’t mind being at the gym once I’m there.

Oh, re: vaxx rollout, MA is being quite slow, NH is being much faster, already doing non-healthcare college students. My sister and dad are still not vaccinated, they’re waiting to be eligible in MA. SO’s mom got vaccinated a month ago or so due to her risk factors, diabetes and such.

 

[Flueky88]

Pretty happy birthday!! I remember you being worried about Halloween and Matthew's birthday.

Shae I too wanted to avoid a December due date cause didn't want their birthday being lumped with Christmas and lack of people at birthday parties due to holiday plans. Christmas isn't my favorite holiday though. I've always been partial to 4th of July. Fireworks, barbecues, fresh fruits, and swimming.

Sorry things are so hectic with school and assignments.

Dobby omg, so jealous of vacation but happy for you! Enjoy it

Sorry for the concerns regarding As weight but I'm sure he's okay. My girls are over 90th for height and weight. They look healthy, active, but do eat some junk. Their pediatrician is happy with their size.


AFM things seemed to have calmed down for now with the neighbor. Work has been busy. Started PT for pelvic floor again. No more kegels until she says so as I've got to get muscles to relax first. My birthday is next week and DH has order me a cheesecake and booked us a couple's massage. E is going back and forth with sleeping, mostly poor sleep though. I'm getting exhausted but just trying to get through each day.

Well I hope everyone has a great weekend!

 

[PrettyInInk42]

shae - Re: Christmas. I feel like changing soaps and dish towels to fit the time of year is a hella white people thing/at least one tax bracket up from where I am. lol. But you do you. Maybe when my kids are older and I know they won't break stuff, I'll decorate based on season a bit. I actually finally figured out how to put up external XMas lights, so I put some up at my house and my mom's. The last time we had some up was XMas 2015, the last XMas we had with my dad. Thank God he took them down before he passed.
Ya, the ability to have a few people in the delivery room would be great. I had SO, my mom, and my (also 9 month pg) friend with me. She took some labour pics, but none of the delivery. She was at my home birth with Matthew too and actual took some PG13 video of the birth, so that was nice. Another friend had her midwife take pics of her delivery. She got induced, so hospital staff took over and the MW was just there for support. She said seeing the pics after was like looking at a horror show. lol
I feel you on the gym. Sometimes the motivation to get there is the hardest part. I haven't been since April '17, when I was like 6 months pg with Alex. I sometimes miss it. Getting a good sweat going on the stair climber, using free weights, putting on music and zoning out. SO says I should go again once the kids are sleeping (and once gyms are allowed to be open), but I'd probably be too exhausted by that time of night. lol

Flueky - Happy early Birthday!
Ooo, a massage sounds nice. Glad to hear the neighbour has backed off. Hope PT is going well and sorry that E is having sleep troubles.

Hope everyone is doing well.

AFM, back to work on Wednesday, unless something happens. Daycare says getting tested was recommended, but not mandatory. And testing centres were doing bookings for days in advance, so I said F it. None of us are showing symptoms.
My BDay was quiet, but alright. A friend (who've I've known since middle school, but only got super close with when we were pg in 2019) left some flowers and a card at my front door. Literally never had anyone do that for me, so it was very appreciated. Still waiting on SO's gift to be delivered. Once it does, I should probably bring up what I'd like for next year, i.e. baby #3. lol

 

[shaescott]

Flukes yay for pelvic floor PT! I think all women should be actively offered it after childbirth, like OBs and midwives should be telling patients that it’s an option and offer to refer them (in my opinion).

My birthday is this week, my mom is making me a cake lol. Happy early birthday!

Sorry about E’s poor sleep.

I like the 4th of July, but I don’t like heat and it generally involves sweating my butt off. But BBQs, fresh fruit, and fireworks are definitely my kind of party. It’s hard for me to compare it to Christmas because they’re so different. I love the coziness of Christmas, the sweaters, the trees, the baking, the decorations. It just brings me a lot of peaceful joy. The 4th isn’t peaceful imo but it’s definitely joyful.

Pretty lol we don’t change dish towels at my house but I do indeed buy seasonal soaps. I grew up upper middle class (and I am hella white). Decorations can be expensive, I hate that. We don’t exactly have an unlimited decor budget so I got most stuff at Walmart. If I was rich I’d probably hire someone to do full out fancy Christmas decor throughout the house, but alas, I am not. I used command hooks to hang green plastic garland and cheap string lights on the walls with $5 big red bows. It honestly didn’t look bad... until the command hooks started falling :/

Re: birth photography, I’d love to hire a photographer so I can get high quality pictures, but I don’t love the idea of a stranger taking pictures of my vag or hanging out in the room during labor. Hopefully I’ll be able to have my sister there to take pictures but if not I’ll just have SO take some during labor and after birth.

How sweet of your friend to drop off flowers! They’re very pretty. And the boys are adorable s usual


AFM currently drowning in schoolwork and interview anxiety but otherwise I’m okay lol. Currently 8dpo. Noticing some acne which I usually get when PMSing. No other PMS symptoms so far. My night sweats this cycle have been super random, I had them a few days before and a few days after O which doesn’t usually happen. There goes my reliable PMS symptom lol. I was dumb and tested today, BFN obviously, but it was a cheapie so no biggie.

 

[DobbyForever]

Been reading but the page keeps reloading and deleting my response, haven’t mustered up the energy to type in a note. Not much new here. Allergies kicking my a** and my older dog has a cyst on her leg apparently trying to get a vet appointment is nuts they’re all booking in f*ing may

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I’m sorry about the allergies and your dog I hope it’s not painful for her. Fx’d you can get her looked at soon. It’s been awful getting vet appointments these days, my 4 year old cat started acting weird and they were booking weeks out. Luckily he went back to normal, we think he ate something weird. He likes to chew on plastic so I wouldn’t be surprised.
BnB wouldn’t load at all for me for a few hours yesterday, it said there was a host error. Sorry you’re having issues as well.

BFN at 9dpo

 

[DobbyForever]

Thx. Luckily got her appointment moved up to Friday so I’ll be “teaching” my third block from the vets parking lot I refuse to call a sub for 45m to administer tests in silence when I can do the same damn thing.

Sorry I know the bfns are a mixed bag even if going in you know logically what the outcome is. Heck I’d s* a brick if I was pregnant and I still can’t help but feel sad when I get my period. So big hugs

and sorry everyone else I really did read and I had things to say but now I’m tired so I will try to type them out soonish. A has a check up tomorrow early afternoon and then vet and maybe a wax Friday or happy hour if I don’t need the wax... waiting to hear from the boy if we’re getting it on. If not cancelling my appt then going to happy hour with the BFF lol

 

[DobbyForever]

Lol so apparently I can’t measure and A is like 3 inches taller than I thought so his weight/height is fine 65th percentile. Gonna give me a stool softener for his cycling between man sized clog the toilet poop and constipation. But overall everything looks good

 

[shaescott]

Dobs how did the vet appointment go today? I hope it was nothing serious. I’m glad to hear that A’s height/weight is totally normal! It’s also great to know he’s not a low percentile because I remember you were worried when he was a baby and he was born small that he’d always be small, but it looks like that’s no longer an issue. Lol @ the poop cycling I often rotate between constipated and everything coming out in 1/4 the time it was meant to, but it’s not clog the toilet level, thank goodness.

Re: BFN, I agree, it’s such a mixed bag. I’m just trying to remind myself that like you said, it’s another month I have to prepare to be a better mom. While I want a baby, thinks are crazy right now and not being able to have reward wine after getting through the million crappy assignments I have would suck.

Speaking of school, things are all coming together over the next month. That is, as long as I can get these last few dang assignments in. I’ve been having a lot of trouble with motivation and just being overwhelmed and not knowing where to start. On the bright side, I picked up my cap and gown, ordered a sundress to wear to graduation because I’ll be hot under those black gowns, and ordered a grad cap topper. Graduation is in a month and a day. Finals end 3 weeks from today. My pinning ceremony is in 2 weeks (although we have to pin ourselves due to COVID, but it’s in person so that’s something). My last clinical day is Tuesday. I have a big exam next week (and one smaller one). I have a group project presentation the next week. The next week I have a final. After finals but before graduation I have to go to a 5 hour NCLEX review (online). I need to start the process of applying for my license because you can start before you graduate, the school just won’t send your records until you graduate. But I can do all the background check and fingerprinting stuff. So yeah, there’s a lot going on.

In related good news, I essentially got a conditional job offer at a hospital in the same town as my college, it’s where I’m doing my clinical currently. They said they want to wait for me to pass the licensure exam (NCLEX) but they don’t want me to go anywhere else so when I pass the exam they should have a full time position for me. I have an interview with another place in a week, so we’ll see how that goes. I’m honestly not sure where I want to go at this point.

Oh and last thing, it snowed today. Like a good 3+ inches of heavy wet snow. I had already put away my boots and only had sneakers. It was in the 60s and sunny 2 days ago. Today it was in the 30s and snowing. Frickin New England.

 

[DobbyForever]

I was right lol it’s a damn funky looking nail

I’m not exactly sober so I don’t exactly have it it me to read past that one sentence. I tried 4x and getting nowhere lol

 

[PrettyInInk42]

shae - Ya, decorations can be pricey. I was looking for those things you can place on a mantle that have a hook on them for stockings this past XMas and they were like $12 each. And then after XMas, I didn't see any on clearance. But I would totally get stuff from the dollar store.
Sounds like you're pretty busy, but also on the home stretch of your schooling. Exciting! And congrats on having a couple job options already.

Dobby - Glad to hear it's nothing serious with your dog and that A's measurements are just fine.
Matthew has some pretty massive poops too. Like, red in the face, crying as they come out. His next Dr appt (over the phone) will be in early May, so I guess I'll bring it up then.
So, I guess The Boy didn't get back to you?

AFM, work is kicking my butt a bit. Coming home sore and tired, but at least I'm slighty losing weight and making money.
There was some story on the news a few nights ago about the government working to really bring down the price of child care in the next couple years. (Currently, it's about $2800 a month for both kids full time) So, SO turns to me and says "you gonna try to convince me to go for #3 now?" If he hadn't been in a bit of a mood that night, I might have actually tried to have that talk with him. But there's still time.
My BDay gift from him still hasn't shown up. C'est la vie. *rolls eyes* lol

Re: Snowy weather. We got some snow last night. It was like 15C (59F) on Monday, 2C (35.5F) today, and we'll close the week back at 14C (57F). These pics were taken on the same road, like 3-ish hours apart. Snow at 9am and melting around noon. Gotta love April in Southern Ontario. lol

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae I second Pretty! Sounds like everything is really closing out well and exciting! Hope you’re getting some you time in there

Pretty yeah his doc put him on a stool softener. I’m not thrilled, but even if he’s not straining it’s obvious the consistency isn’t right.

hopefully work only gets easier here on out but yay for added bonuses. And isn’t that the second or third time he’s joked about 3? I hope that convo goes well when you have it and you get to start trying for 3! The snow is pretty! I’m sure it’s not fun to live in lol or maybe it is. I’ll never know

The Boy officially ended things yesterday. He was being so sweet for the last few weeks. Like we were actually back to chatting and he’d text first. So naturally I’m on the verge of potentially having to kiss this one boy with The Boy being cutesy. So I asked him why he isn’t seeing other women and to clarify our boundaries. And he said there’s too many unintended feelings and it’s not fair to either of us so we can’t keep doing whatever we’re doing. So. Yup.

meanwhile this other dude I need to cut loose. He’s genuinely nice and would be so good to A and me. But he’s such a man child and so painfully ignorant and it’s so aggravating. And I don’t like who I am with him. The Boy made me want to be better and heal and grow. This guy just enables me and pulls me back into my trauma because he’s still in his.

 

[DobbyForever]

Oh yeah decorations are pricey. I’m finally starting to put house decor and it’s like I stopped counting after $500. And we’re not talking holiday decor. My parents were never big on it. But I imagine if you invest in quality stuff and store it properly, you build up to a big show or you just eat the cost upfront. I should care more so A cares more but I’m too burned out to go ham for holidays

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Re: Snow. It has its pros and cons. It looks nice and can be fun for the kids. But when you have to brush off your car while it's still snowing and the area you started at has already started to accumulate more snow, no bueno. lol. But I need all the seasons. I can't imagine being able to go outside in short and a tee on XMas day. lol. I think we're in the clear now though. Gonna be warming up for the foreseeable future and snow in May is hella rare.

Sorry about the Boy, I guess. As nice as it is to flirt and chat and get a little sexual healing, having a relationship with more devotion and less drama is definitely better. There's a great guy for you out there for sure. Hopefully you don't have to kiss too many frogs before you find to him.

I'm not really into decorative trinkets either. I have a few things displayed on the bookshelf in the living room, but I'm more into pictures. Either way, we really don't have a ton of room for stuff atm anyway. Again, maybe when the kids are older and we don't have a ton of toys everywhere. lol

 

[shaescott]

Pretty the dollar store stuff is pretty low quality but it’s obviously cheap af. I bought stuff there for my dorm room since I didn’t need it to hold up for years. They have some cute wood signs that aren’t terrible quality, though. I got a 12 inch Christmas tree to set on my desk lol. For my house we went to Walmart and yeah, it was expensive. But we put all the decorations in boxes to use next year, so hopefully it’ll pay off that way. I’m less interested in non-holiday decor. I plan to have pictures and maybe a few other wall hangings, maybe some pieces on bookshelves, flowers on the table, but that’s it. I think furniture plays such a huge role in decor so I’d rather spend my money on nice looking furniture. That is, if I even have enough money for that lol.

I’m sorry you’re so exhausted from the new job, but I’m glad to hear that it’s helping with weight loss etc. Daycare is crazy expensive so it’s great that they’re trying to do something about it. I wouldn’t blame you for using that as a reason why you guys should try for #3 haha, love that your SO made a joke about it. Hopefully he’ll be receptive.

I totally relate re: snow, it’s pretty and all but oh my lord is it annoying sometimes. I really despise shoveling snow and cleaning off my car. On the other hand, I wouldn’t want to live somewhere where it doesn’t snow. I agree, I don’t want it to be warm on Christmas. Hopefully Friday was the last snow until next fall/winter.


Dobs sorry about The Boy but I’m glad things were made clear, the ambiguity and being strung along isn’t fair to anyone. Also sorry about having to cut this other guy loose, but it sounds like it’s the right call, you want someone who makes you better not worse.

Re: decor, we’re trying storing Christmas decor and reusing it, hopefully it works out. It was definitely a few hundred dollars, so I’d be annoyed if it only lasted one holiday season.


AFM the other hospital cancelled my interview because they were out of spots. So that sucks. However, I still have the offer at the one I’m doing my capstone at. I’ll probably apply to a few more places. We’ll see what happens.

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae sorry about the interview being cancelled. Hopefully they keep you in mind if something opens. But I’m glad you do still have a plan b. So many people have no clue what they are doing after graduation so that’s super cool

pretty ditto like idk shit in my house has to matter to me. So everything so far is family photos or my paint night art. I just ordered fancy diploma frames and I did some galleries of beach photos I took. I just got cheap frames at Michael’s during buy one get one but I still shelled out $200 on frames and Costco photo printing

Yeah I mean I miss the sex and attention but end of day even if he wanted to date me i don’t think he prioritizes his partner enough. I think this aerospace engineer I saw on hinge just did a presentation for my class lol but the science teacher will not hook a girl up! He’s so cute and loves his dad and was in drum line in college and is so passionate about his job and good with kids and nerd cute and an AEROSPACE ENGINEER. But alas. He eludes me lol he has no social media blueprint, I’m so mad lol

 

[PrettyInInk42]

shae - There's some kinda decent stuff at our big Canadian dollar store chain, but some of the stuff can be up to $4 a piece. Still better than some other big box stores.
I have a bunch of XMas and Halloween decorations in my garage too. I actually just bought several storage containers and one of those black resin shelves for the garage to help organize stuff better. Gonna TRY to get to that this weekend, but I'm not gonna hold my breath. Giving mine and SO's cars a good vacuuming/cleaning is priority. lol
Sorry your interview got canceled, but at least you have the other job waiting for you.

Dobby - Ooo, that looks nice. Super artsy.
That sucks about the elusive engineer though.

Here are some pics in the living room and part of the bookcase.

 

[DobbyForever]

Awww love those photos!

hope the car cleaning and/or garage organizing went well! Be gracious with yourself. No rush to get everything done.

I deleted the boy off my FB and now FB won’t take him off my friends list on my home page it’s like add him back. No fb that’s not how that works. I deleted him for a reason. Insert eye roll.

These allergies are killing me but A loves being outside.