General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[DobbyForever]

Ooooo thanks for the update! Hope you’re feeling good! Do you feel like she’s coming soon?

 

[PrettyInInk42]

I hope so. Looking back at my last labours, I can't really remember there being signs that it was about to start. Everything was business as usual, went to bed, and was woken up by contractions. There have been several times over the last few days that there was so much movement and pressure that I was surprised my water didn't break. lol. But, like I said, she's still all comfy an cozy in there. If she's anything like Matthew, she could be in there for another week.

 

[gigglebox]

Proper response later but yay for labor watch!!! You gotta give us one last bump photo!

 

[Flueky88]

Gigs, I know I'm excited about seeing those 160s soon! I did get into the 160s for a brief time after having V but I got the flu and it just derailed my motivation with working out. As far as the 150s....it's been a really long time, probably 8 or 9 years.

Ah it is kind of nice feeling a light amount of soreness. It just reaffirms that you made an impact. I did some chest flies and omg I'm sore. I did give myself a rest day. Still walked but thought I'd skip the beachbody workout for one night.

Dobby I can understand. I was really disgusting when I was in 200s when not pregnant. I was exhausted, stressed, breastfeeding hungry, and 5 months postpartum.

Also, so glad I'm not the only one hearing about the occasional "bad" day of eating. I believe I was near my weight loss goal in WW back in 2011 and I was getting there slowly. Well I had a night out with some girls I used to work with. So shots, bar food, and I had a skillet cookie with ice cream and fudge. I actually lost weight that week. So I've definitely seen it first hand. The hard part is to not continue eating "badly".

That is interesting about having a genetic predisposition for a weight range. I didn't realize that.

Thank you about MIL. Oh and yes, I don't think I hear or read as many spoilers as years ago. Thankfully everything gets on digital/streaming apps quickly now.

Well glad that the pimple shouldn't be an issue and yeah I don't blame you for not wanting to do Disney. I would kind of like to take the girls but it would just be too exhausting for them and frustrating for us.

Pretty oh I'm sorry she is being extra comfy right now. Well I do hope that she doesn't wait as long as Matthew. Also, yes we need a bump pic

 

[DobbyForever]

I'm jumping on the train of bump pic requests! Hehehe. Definitely keep popping in for your update.

Fluek right?! The cheat days thing seems so counterintuitive and the media makes it seem so awful in shows, but I definitely think it works/ Both in a physical sense but also emotional because strict dieting is so frustrating. You have to have something to look forward to haha.

I had heard about genetic prepositions in a very general/broad sense like in terms of build or metabolism. We have talked about it in health I think, but I didn't know it applied specifically to average weight as well. I guess makes sense, but I was shocked when it was part of the health report.

Honestly, the only pull of Disneyland is the churros. But I remember when *rofl* churros were 75 cents!

You all inspired me to do a ride last night. First one in quite a while. Good old Cody Rigsby LOL one of his older rides, but he cracks me up/ I can't believe they let him say what he says haha. You also inspired me to replace the batteries in my scale. 139.1. So since the beginning of the school year, I've gained 12 lbs. Let the work begin.

Annnnnd here's the cap and gown photo! I can't believe he'll be a kindergartener 3 months!

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Flueky - Glad to hear you're not too worried about your liver results. And way to go on the weight loss. Sorry to hear about your MIL's health issues. Hopefully she'll come to her senses and start taking care of herself, but old habits can die hard. Is she still working cuz she needs to money, or does she just really like what she does?
Hope V's party goes well. Is it just gonna be family, or some friends as well?

Dobby - If you're really, truly ok with your current relationship with OA, then I support you/it. I wish things were a little smoother and more consistent considering your previous relationships, but if you see yourself living with him at some point in the future, I'm sure that'll make things a little less chaotic when it comes to spending quality time together. Either way, we're all here for you no matter how things go.
A looks so adorable in his pic. They grow so fast.

Gigs - Sorry to hear about your MIL. What's the plan for her? Lump removal, radiation? Either way, FX they did indeed catch it early and she can beat it nice and quickly.
Those definitely sound like some out-of-nowhere comments/concerns on your SIL's part. I'd be kinda hurt too. Are you gonna let the dust settle and then ask why she now feels this way or just leave it?

Sorry if I've forgotten to comment on everyone else's news.

Re: weight. Well, sounds like I am by far the heaviest in the thread. I know my highest pre-pregnancy weight was 232. When I got pg with Alex, I was 200. Got up to 260 with him, down to like 228 postpartum, then back up to 255 just before I went back to work. Pg with Matthew at 230, got up to 275, lost about half, then up to 272. Started keto and IF and lost 40lbs. Lost another 20 once I started working again. Got down to 207. When I got my BFP with Baby Girl, I was 212 and, as of a couple days ago, I'm 271. So, ya. My goal right now is to lose, but not regain a bunch during leave and then get back to keto/IF when I'm done BFing.

Re: Upcoming 5yo BDay party. I asked Alex if he had a theme in mind or just some colours he liked for decorations and didn't really get a straight answer. We have 2 months to figure it out though. Probably just gonna try to keep it simple though. Finger foods, cupcakes, kiddie pool, etc.

AFM, it's past midnight here, so Baby Girl is officially late. I've been off work since Monday, so I've just been puttering around at home, doing grocery shopping, and chilling in between. Specifically putting my feet up everytime I can feel them getting tight from swelling. I'm not over being pg since this is more than likely my last time. It's just the not knowing when she'll come, the pain of labour, and not knowing how long it'll last. Also, I thought we'd finally decided on a name, but the name I prefer isn't exactly SO's top choice and vice versa. I think we're just gonna have to wait til she comes out and see what feels right.

I'll take a bump shot tomorrow, but for now, bed time for me. lol

 

[gigglebox]

Pink, are you tall? You carry your weight well. I wouldn't have guessed by your photos what your weight is. Your game plan sounds good! and wow 40lbs with keto! How long did that take? I mentioned it before but hubby had great success with it. He is still eating keto but not doing IF and he is either starting to gain again or maybe just not losing anymore weight; I'm not sure because he refuses to step on a scale. So that's strictly based on what he looks like to me *shrug*

To answer your question about SIL, I'm just going to let it be. She's a nut bar, that one. I've had a lot of issues with her and know by now that she's stubborn af and to leave things be. Hilariously she texted me yesterday to help her with her baby shower/celebration. So I don't even know with that one.

fx you go into labor soon! I'm sure you're ready to meet her and ready to not be pregnant anymore!

oh and MIL-- she is getting tested today to see if she carries the gene they're associating with cancer now. If she's positive for it, she's thinking of doing a full mastectomy (both sides) just to eliminate the chance of it coming back. If she's not a carrier, she's leaning toward a lumpectomy with radiation. She's also going to find out which method is the least likely to end having to have radiation/chemo -- she knows so many people who were wrecked by chemo. My own grandmother had cancer but was cancer free when she died; it was all the "treatment" that did her in :/

Fluek any update on your MIL?

Dobs I think that's a good plan with OA. I know you're not ready to let him meet A -- are you ready to meet his offspring? Like are you curious? I would be curious as heck to meet her! Also what about the added pressure of probably having to meet baby momma at some point? hmmm def sounds to me like your brother was interested in his current gf for a bit, and no harm in that helping him break away from the relationship he was unhappy with. Sometimes we need that motivation to get us out of the current situation. and that is interesting about the weight disposition and genetics. Also I find it funny that it's 135 but you're not comfortable at that weight, haha. What do you attribute the weight gain to? You said "let the work begin"-- what's the game plan? and OMG how cute is A?!!! I hear you on starting K! I need to figure out what to do with ds2. I'm not sure if I want to get an actual curriculum or just wing it, which is how I started with DS1. With is being "just" K, I think I'll just wing it for this first year...

afm...I weighed in this morning, back to 169.8, so barely back into the 160's which was my first mini goal next mini goal is 164.something, then back to the 150's. I'd like to be in the 150's by the time of my next disc golf tournament which is mid-June, so we'll see...

 

[DobbyForever]

Aww Pretty you’re so sweet. Also how ironic would it be if because you take a bumper tomorrow is the day hehe. That sounds like a winning party to me!

Gigs yay! Glad you hit your first mini goal! That’s awesome!

It’s so interesting that we’re all working on weight loss goals. Obviously probably large part the whole active parenting makes self care a challenge. Hopefully we can keep each other motivated

Re OA. I knew it was coming and I almost told him last time we talked that it doesn’t sound like he has time to see me and we could put a pin on plans until I’m off work in two weeks, but I didn’t because I didn’t want to put thoughts in his head lol. Anyway I could tell by his mannerisms that cancellation was coming so I CTJ him to tell me straight so I could cancel my Brazilian and not waste money. And he was like no sorry I’m really struggling. It sucks but I get it. I think he’s been home less than five days all month, and his daughter’s mom is really coming down on him. I didn’t ask for details but it sounds like he did still take her to brunch right before he flew out and it was a deeply unpleasant morning. Anyway. I texted him later to say we should talk because I like him but I think he really needs to think about whether or not he’s actually capable of being with me logistically. But he said he was really overwhelmed and just needed some alone time and will call me today. Idk. It’s improvement in some ways like I’ve asked him to tell me he can’t call vs just not call. And I’m not mad just disappointed. I’d be pissed if I shelled out the $80 for that Brazilian though. ETA the reason I was thinking of telling him not to stress until I’m off work is that each time we’re on the phone the last 3x he sounds progressively worse. Like he’s trying his best to hide it, but I finally directly asked him last weekend if he was ok. And he said no but he doesn’t talk to me about it because I can’t fix the things stressing him out and talking about them just makes him frustrated versus feeling better. He gave me a short summary but yeah I didn’t press him because even just him running through the list of daily bs I could hear him getting overwhelmed.

I don’t know. I feel like out of respect for his daughter, I shouldn’t be comfortable meeting her until I’m comfortable with him meeting Aiden. But I’d be more comfortable because I’m a teacher so I work with kids all the time. And if it meant seeing him more then I’d probably cave and do it. The person I’m most keen to meet is her mom. He only speaks highly of her, but I don’t like some of the things I hear. She sounds a bit entitled (pot calling the kettle black LOL) so I feel like she and I will either be best friends or f*ing hate each other

 

[gigglebox]

I still find the dynamic between those two weird (OA and the ex) but to each their own. Regardless, I know everyone's in full support mode, but I am questioning things from what you say. He sounds noncommittal to me and I feel like this series of let downs is only going to continue. I hope that I am wrong! He sounds like he has potential but also part of me is like what if he just knows exactly what to say to string you along? But I'm not there feeling all the feels so I truly just hope it works out for the best, whatever that is. Anyway I hope he can give you some sort of reasoning that is satisfactory for whatever is going on with him. I feel for him and his frustration.

And....yay for not wasting $80! Dang that's steep but I guess that's a job you gotta pay a little extra for! I've never been waxed, I don't think....I did wax hubby's back once and it was terrible; wax stuck to him, patchiness, lots of fun! I just shave him since lol; I don't mind it though, I like my men hairy he hates it though.

 

[Flueky88]

Dobby, yes self care is way harder as a parent. Hope we all reach out goals

Also I would be mad as heck to waste $80. I tried a wax once, never again for me. Honestly, just prefer to trim. My skin is so sensitive there.

Omg A is so adorable in his photo! He is gorgeous

Gigs yay for reaching 1st mini goal hope! hope you reach your goal by the disc golf tournament next month.

My MILs Hgb was 5 on Monday, she had 2 units of PRBCs on Wednesday, then Hgb retested. She got a call either yesterday afternoon or today that her level was 7.8 from the recheck so she's going in for another transfusion on Monday. She has an appt with the hematologist/oncologist July 22nd. I told her I really think she should call to be seen sooner, she just said "ok". So who knows. She is very stubborn and neglects herself. I will check again next week and ask and push it again. After that I will probably stop. I di ask if she stopped taking her iron pill and she said she'd stopped about a month ago because of some GI side effects. I don't know what her level was before stopping but I feel like going to a 5 is pretty extreme. DH is meeting her to take her groceries in for her today though.

I will be praying that your MIL doesn't have that gene. It would be nice if she didn't have to have a double mastectomy but understandable if she needs to.

I think for K, winging it would be fine. I'm just so impressed that you homeschool. Seriously, you deserve an award DH is open to homeschooling depending on how public school works out.

Bah I wouldn't know hot to react either with SIl asking for help with shower.

Pretty awww don't talk so down on yourself about weight. I agree with gigs you carry it well. Hope that you are a lucky one that has lbs melt away while BFing! Definitely envious of those that do.

MIL, I don't think she necessarily HAS to work but she wants to until her car is paid off AND she needs to replace her flooring. In 2020 she discovered that her floor us falling through in spots in her living room and I think as of last year a section in her bedroom. I'm not sure where she is going to put all her things while the repairs are being done. She is a hoarder and her bedroom is so full of shit, she hasn't sleeped in her bedroom for at least 10 years.

I think just family as it's Memorial Day holiday and many people will have plans. Ah well hope he comes up with a theme so it makes it easier for you

Well I hope you get to enjoy these last few days or day before her arrival. I can't wait to hear your birth story.

 

[DobbyForever]

Oooo and I’m gearing up for a fight idk I’d I mentioned but the school is clearly going to push for mild/moderate special day class and they know I’m not going for it so the head of the sped department is finally showing her face. Like literally both administrators of the sped department are coming and they’ve banned his Gen Ed school from talking to me

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Gigs - No. The tallest I've ever registered at at a Dr's appt was 5'6", once. Otherwise, I'm about 5'5". The 40lbs came off in about 3 months. Then I got complacent and just kinda maintained instead of losing more til I started work again.
Ya, I've heard radiation can mess people up. SO's aunt had lung cancer and the radiation really messed up her brain. Some days, she's fine. Others, she's not really sure what's going on.
And yay for being back in the 160's.

Dobby - Well, FX things go smoothly whenever you meet his daughter and his mom. And which school are you gearing up to fight? A's?

Flueky - Historically, it hasn't really melted away for me. I just lose the weight of the baby, placenta, fluid/extra blood volume, and then start gaining again cuz I'm just sitting around all day. Like I said though, gonna try to keep the weight I put back on to a minimum. Just don't wanna calorie restrict/work out so much that I affect my supply. But we'll see how things go this time.
Ah, that sucks about her floor. At least that means things will hopefully be paid off quicker cuz she's making a full wage instead of whatever she'd get during retirement.

AFM, 11:30pm and still no signs of labour. Haven't taken a bump pic yet, but I will very soon and ETA.

 

[DobbyForever]

Dumped him over text since he couldn’t make time to respond or call me. Not happy about it. Don’t want to be told I did the right thing or he applauded for being strong. My BFF invalidated my feelings, my other BFF sent me to vm, fam ignored me or invalidated me, and my grandmother hung up on me to take another call. So. I took a bath, did a few guided meditations, and a 30m spin class. None of which helped so I’ll just go to bed and bury my feelings per usual

 

[DobbyForever]

Pretty you are gorgeous. Absolutely beautiful bump picture.

 

[Flueky88]

Dobby it is sad that you have to fight to get A what he needs. I hope it's an "easy" fight. Also

Pretty beautiful photo! Thinking of you.

AFM showed a weight gain. I haven't been tracking but I don't feel like I would have gained 2 lbs. Think it's just my sore muscles/inflammation. Will try to track more soon, life is just hectic.

 

[DobbyForever]

Gigs some people are so entitled. Like really, after insulting you she’s just going to ask you to help for her shower? What are you thinking? I’d love to say I’d be petty and ignore her or make some quip about feeling uncomfortable using her own hurtful words. But the reality is that I probably would, just because if things do mend then you don’t want to look back and have missed it. And a shower really isn’t about celebrating the mother, in my opinion. It’s about celebrating the baby. That being said, I firmly believe there is a line. Like was I really ever planning to go to my cousin’s wedding? For the free food and booze maybe, but not really even then lol. And that was just to attend not help so. Do whatever feels best to you. I’m so sorry about MIL. It sounds like testing positive or negative both carry some heavy weight to them. I’ll be keeping you all in my thoughts.

Re the bro and gf, yeah they’re on good terms. So I’m happy for him, and I told my mom even if it doesn’t work out at least know he knows what healthy and happy looks like. So he’s less likely to go back to someone like his ex.

Re game plan. The weight gain is stress eating. Eating crap because I don’t have time to cook anymore, let alone grocery shop. I’m not walking the dogs in the morning anymore, I was only able to do it because I was WFH and only worked half a day. I stopped spinning because I was just too physically/emotionally exhausted to get on the bike or to even stay up after putting A to bed. Basically, everything has fallen to crap. Also, my IF eating window was to eat every two hours from 8am-4pm. But I’m at work 7:30am-3:15pm so I just never really readjusted my diet/exercise to working full time. The gain was slow at first, but after the whole Setsuna incident… in before eating my feelings. But the plan is basically go back to IF and healthy eating and exercising regularly over the summer while I'm off work. Next year, my mom is taking a leave and we've already talked about her picking A up a couple times a week so I can maybe take a dance class or go back to krav.

Re K curriculum, I agree. I say wing it. It’s kinder and obviously you had awesome success with DS1.

Re A’s school. The long story short is that they will want to bully me into agreeing to placing him in the Mild/Moderate Special Day Class. I’m not opposed to SDC if he truly needs, but as a general ed teacher myself I really believe in full inclusion as much as possible. And especially with having tried gen ed with full supports before just putting him there. Once you’re in SDC, it’s very difficult to move a child back out both legally, logistically, and emotionally on the child. So if there’s ever a year to try gen ed, it’s kindergarten. But based on the fact that his home school is icing me out and clearly has talked to the SPED team, the roster of the meeting, and general comments/ his advocate used to work for them… both the admins from the SPED department are coming. She said they’re going to try to place him in SDC right off the bat. So I’ve been studying the case law, which is totally in my favor to keep him placed in gen ed. Luckily, the registrar had me go ahead and enroll him vs waiting on the IEP team. So even if they decide to fight me in court over it, the law allows A to stay put until we sort it out. Which def won’t be before August.

RE OA and his ex. Not my monkey, not my circus anymore. But from what I can pick up between the lines, she sounds like she uses his parental guilt to get what she wants.

Re wax: I’ve only waxed my lady bits since I was like 18/19? I loooove waxing. Omg. This is where my kink shows, but the feel of warm to hot wax on my skin. And when they pull it, like assuming the skill level is there. It’s so satisfying haha. I find it incredibly relaxing. But it adds up! I cannot wax my legs though. Idk why. It’s excruciatingly painful.

Okay I went deep sorry so Flueky gotta respond later to your post because yikes! I was waiting for A to finish his cereal thinking I cn respond in 5 minutes and now it’s like 10 minutes later. Oops.

 

[shaescott]

Went wedding dress shopping, bought this dress! The nude cups won’t stand out like that in the one I get, we added a liner since the bodice was sheer except the cups but in the sample dress the cups were already sewn in, in mine they’ll be behind any liner. Didn’t buy a veil because SO’s mom offered to sew me one. Bought one size up from the sample cuz after a while it started feeling pinchy in the waist and per the size chart my waist was one inch bigger than the sample dress’s waist measurement.

 

[Flueky88]

Dobby no problem.

Shae, gorgeous dress!!

 

[shaescott]

Dobs yikes you’ve had a week. Sorry they’re trying to push A out of Gen Ed. I know he can have behavior issues sometimes but I really do think it’s beneficial for him to be interacting with kids without any neurodevelopmental disorders/disabilities for purposes of modeling age appropriate behavior and speech and stuff like that. Just my 2¢ as someone who’s never met your kid lol so my opinion doesn’t carry much weight.

Sorry about the breakup. Hugs

Pretty yay for the bump pic! Fingers crossed your little girl will be making an appearance very soon!

Flueks thank you!

 

[DobbyForever]

BB another day but Shae. SHAE. S.H.A.E. I'm not girl! I know I can't see your face. But your natural hair and that dress. And omg your mom is sewing your veil?! I just cannot. CANNOT. Omg. PLEASE do first look photos because SO is just gonna bawl. Stunning!