General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

Bahaha Dobs, damn right. And I did an ethics oral exam for my master’s literally on my due date with Matilda. But the part about me crying through half of it can be left out…
 
Still too tired for real reply but he’s progression looks great it’s hard to see day to day oncheapies (though I def see it) but clear as day every other day. I line mine up evens and odds hah
 
Wow that’s so smart. Wish I hadn’t taped them down now lol
 
Dobs lol if DH had an office job I’d agree that he needs to just come home and work on his portfolio when he’s not working, but unfortunately he works a job that’s entirely outdoors with a lot of physical labor. He carries 30 lbs of equipment on his back through thorn bushes, swamps, rivers, etc, he has to dig for property bounds no matter how frozen the ground is, he’s out there whether it’s 20 degrees or 90 degrees. He comes home with scratches from thorn bushes, poison ivy, etc. He’s forced to drive a truck that is visibly unsafe to drive, despite his complaints to his employer. He was 20 feet from a lightning strike a few weeks ago and miraculously wasn’t hit by the shrapnel of the tree that exploded. A tractor trailer truck almost ran him over a few months ago, it was literally an inch from him when it barreled down the road, his coworker was white as a ghost seeing it happen. All that, and he gets paid far less than I do. I would quit day 1 if I was asked to do half the physical labor he does. All that to say, when he gets home, he genuinely needs to rest, both physically and mentally. He can’t work on his portfolio effectively with this job, which is why he’s taking the time off to treat it like a full time job. I also really want him to quit because the job is literally dangerous and his employer doesn’t care that they’re risking his life every day. He’s just worried that I’ll suddenly be incapacitated by extreme symptoms and he’ll have to scramble to find a new job that will support us. He won’t be able to go back to the old job because we’re moving too far away. Hopefully I’ll be able to reassure him that I should be fine to keep working the full 9 months.


Jez oh he’s totally scared of the responsibility of having a baby. He very much wants to have one, he says so all the time, but he’s also terrified that he’ll be a bad father. I think that’s normal for guys though.

The progesterone testing is through Inito, it’s a fertility monitor, it uses specialized urine strips. They aren’t cheap tbh but yes, it’s available to anyone willing to dish out the money for it. I think it was the physical stress on my body more than emotional stress that caused the low progesterone, but I do know that emotional stress will often delay my ovulation, so it totally does affect our hormone production! My body probably decided it was too stressed to be a healthy home for a growing baby, so it prevented implantation of a baby as a response. Our bodies are crazy, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if that was exactly what happened.

Wonderful progression! Have you made your first doctor/midwife appointment yet?
 
Yikes Shae, DH’s job sounds wild, and not in a good way. I’d defo be encouraging of ways of finding him an alternative. What kind of portfolio is he planning on creating? And yes, I think a lot of men are anxious about fatherhood and how they’ll perform at it. Thanks for the reminder about the midwife appt… I’d applied to a couple of nearby ones last week but I’m supposed to follow up if I haven’t heard back in 5 days, so I’ll try to remember to do that tomorrow. I really hope it works out. I’d be pissed if it doesn’t, considering I basically applied at 12dpo… I don’t know how much sooner other folks would’ve gotten in for my due date. I do have an ultrasound booked for Sep 11 though.

I’m trying to think of cute ways of revealing this pregnancy to Matilda when the time comes. Happy to hear ideas!
 
Ok I have a little more energy today now that the first day of school is over haha.

Flueky awww that’s cute about the spinner thing but also like what do people expect haha. How is V liking her class/teacher? Hopefully the prek comes through! That’s awesome about the neighbor! It’s such a lost social practice to be close with the neighbors.

Pretty that’s so funny about Zoey climbing on their bunk beds. Absolutely adorable. Love that fearlessness!

Jez awww well you can exacta knife them off jk jk. I’m just oct when it comes to hpts. I love poas and staring at them.
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Shae we’re gonna have to agree to disagree. I have very low tolerance for to getting things done that have to get done because that’s not how I function. I will say though I’ve never had a physical job. I complain having to move one 50 lb box a year lol. That sounds like a really s* situation to be in and I agree he needs to get out. I do understand wanting to have something else lined up first before jumping ship, but with the move to your papa’s it sounds like now is the best time you’ll be financially. Plus there’s always filler jobs. Like I worked at PetSmart making $10/hr while I got my teaching credential. I go bit, peed on, humped, yelled at, sexually harassed and assaulted by my manager… it sucked. But it paid the rent while I went to school. So he could always do something part time while working on his portfolio. Though I’ll still say he doesn’t work 7 days a week. And it’s not like a portfolio is a lifelong project in his case. So he needs to knuckle down and just do it. When I had my cyst pregnancy, I was teaching full time, doing free tutoring before and after school, doing 1-2x a week of girl group lunches with the guidance counselor because the girls in my class were cutting themselves, I was a Year 2 BTSA candidate trying to clear my credential (coursework and tests and observations), dealing with an abusive stalker ex, and I was in my master’s program full time. I started doing krav 5x a week because my mental health was so bad. So as much as I just wanted to go home and veg and cry and quit my masters or postpone my year 2 (you have 5 years to clear your credential), I knew it was temporary pain for major long term game. So at the end of the day, I’m very put up or shut up. It’s the cause of like 99% of my relationship friction with people. You want it, you find a way and do it. Especially if your choices impact someone else.

I think you should be fine working. Literally all my teacher friends, though different job for sure, work up to and past their due dates. How’s the saving coming? I really think that’s going to be a game changer for him because having that nest egg I think will give him some peace.

Long story short I just want you to be able to ttc soon cuz I know you’re itching for it. My loyalty is to your ovaries not his anxiety. ;)

I think the Temu 90% off makes me uncomfortable. Like as much as I want to buy something I know should be $25 for $2…. that’s just weird hahaha. SUS as the kids would say.

AFM first day of school went well. Already feeling the strain of not having my mom to call on. Her boss refused to let her take her prep today to take A to school. I’m pissed at her boss and pissed at my mom for not having a spine. My brother and stepdad took him, but their pictures are stupid LOL. Luckily the Y director took some great photos of A and me this morning. My class seems sweet. I have one kid with a s* home life. His parents were screaming out front so he didn't want to come to class and be associated with them/ be embarrassed and labeled as the kid with the parents who fight at school.
 
Jez I’ve never revealed a pregnancy to a child so I have zero experience in that department. I bet there’s ideas on like Pinterest or just articles on Google. My parents told us about a big trip using a scavenger hunt, I wonder if that could be a fun way to do it? Ending with the announcement? As long as a baby is something she’d be excited about lol

He’ll be creating a portfolio of 3D artwork. He got his bachelor’s degree in video game design with a concentration in 3D modeling. In order to get a job in that field, you need a solid portfolio with lots of examples of your work. 3D models aren’t quick to make, so he unfortunately can’t just make one in a few hours.

Dobs I give major kudos to people who can live that way, every waking moment being work with no time to just sit and breathe. There were some girls in college who worked a lot while going to school full time and I don’t know how they did it. I got a part time job and literally couldn’t get my homework done unless I wanted to live on 2 hours of sleep every day. I quit the job, it wasn’t worth it to me because I could survive without it. They literally didn’t have a choice because they had no financial support from their parents. I truly think that they are some of the strongest people I’ve ever met. At the same time, that is like my worst nightmare and my mental health would be absolutely destroyed. Of course if it was the only way to survive, I’d do it, but if I have a choice, absolutely not. I’m sure it’s also majorly cultural, our attitudes about work.

For saving, I’ve got a little under $11k and 1.5 months left of the contract. I get to put away about $1500 a week. We’ve had some expenses come up like car repairs that cut into the total savings but we’re still doing okay. And I appreciate your loyalty to my ovaries :rofl:
 
It’s definitely not a great way to live, but it’s temporary. And if he’s not willing to do it and you have a living situation and ability to hold down the finances, he needs to quit and get a move on. Partners support their partners through school and career changes all the time. I just don’t like the delay. You’ve waited and waited. I don’t think it’s fair to ask you to wait about 6 months to a year at this point. But it’s tough because you both should be enthusiastic and agreed on ttc. So hopefully he moves forward whether it’s quitting or pulling double duty. He should see if he can get a remote Cali job. My friend is trying to move to Ohio but looking for online admin jobs in Cali haha

s* is hitting the fan with A’s school update later
 
Pics at 6m. Tested because I threw up yesterday morning and this morning. I did have a glass of wine right before bed and ate weird things. Also could just be sick lol. Tested because I’ve not been good with my pills with all the stress of my mom having Covid, dealing with my job, A’s school. I took a good amount of pills late (up to 12 hours late) and I’ve doubled up twice. DTD was 12 days ago well before I got my usual mid pill pack horniness/when I’d expect to O off bfps. But even my bff the skeptic told me go get a frer and test again

other weird things I noticed I’m starving all the time yesterday and today. My mom made me cry yesterday.

I still think I can’t be and I’m seeing things

IMG_2459.jpeg BC2DBA18-7C3B-4282-B71D-FF5991178E95.jpeg IMG_2460.jpeg DD482FD4-1F11-46C4-A691-FA96D2701DFA.jpeg
 
Ordered some for curbside. I'm supposed to take A to the zoo today so can't test until later unless the order is ready in the next 45m. I could have dragged A to target but I'm too tired.

Eta other weird symptom is I went from like no more pets to suddenly this last week I want all the pets
 
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Dude imagine how crazy it would be if we had 3 of us pregnant at once! That would be so cool, being bump buddies. I know you weren’t planning on getting pregnant, and life is crazy enough as it is, but I’m a big believer that whatever happens is what was meant to happen. Anyway, I’m getting ahead of myself. Let’s see what that FRER says tonight. The cheapie is definitely positive though. Is it expired by any chance?
 
Yeah idk it would be the worst timing although we’re at the zoo for the first time with no safety tether abc he’s doing really well staying close enough lol or stopping if he realizes he’s rounded a corner or coming back if I’m too stubborn to leave an exhibit so idk

order was not ready before we left so it has to wait til later. But yeah line was still there when I left so. These were ordered mid April so I’m assuming they’re not expired but I didn’t double check.

so I know last pack I ended a day early cuz originally the plan was to DTD Sunday and sometimes I’m still spotting Sunday. I meant to start my pack Saturday but forgot. We DTD tues cd 8. I vaguely remember forgetting the pill on Sunday too as I meant to take it before I left but I forgot. So I took it the next morning. There were two days I had t double up. One was last Thursday and I had checked and had the wrong day of the week in my head so I thought I took it but didn’t. And it was weird because usually I feel super sick when I double up (and this was the second time I’ve had to this pack) and I felt nothing. Idk I’m still not convinced

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Dobby I definitely see that line. FX for whichever outcome you are hoping for.

Also ditto about feeling Temu is sus.

I'm sorry things are hitting the fan with A's school.

Jez are you having any symptoms yet? I can't remember if you had said when you were going to tell Tilly. I hope it goes well when you do.


Shae I'm sorry DH has such a horrible job. I know he's had some issues with depression and that can really drain your ability to do much. I hope you guys can start ttc soon though as you have waited a long time and you have a good nest egg foe when you are on leave.

Pretty oh no about Zoey being a little daredevil! Hope you are all doing well.
 
There’s just this scary thought of I did everything right with A and yet he has all these special needs

this pregnancy I’m on a super restrictive diet, not consistent with my daily vitamin, been drinking, and I had a yeast infection last week and used the 3 day not the 1 day

Also yes temu like I want this display but the idea it’s only a few dollars scares Me lol

will read and respond when I’m home

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Dobs I know it’s scary, but you’d be so early that it’s highly unlikely that any of that matters. As long as you get off the restrictive diet, stop drinking, and start taking your vitamins as soon as you confirm you’re pregnant, you should be fine. When it comes to A, his father claims to be autistic and although it’s possible he’s just a jerk, he could be both. That genetically pre-disposes him. You were also going through a lot emotionally during that pregnancy due to that harmful relationship, which you’ve mentioned can increase the risk of autism. This maybe baby would have a different father and would not have a mom going through an abusive relationship. There’s never any guarantees about a child’s health, but I do think that this maybe baby would have a better shot. Regardless, A’s autism is not your fault, and if this maybe baby were to have autism as well, it still wouldn’t be your fault. Your health choices during pregnancy are far more impactful than pre-pregnancy. The most important thing would to be to get on that prenatal vitamin ASAP for neural tube development and stop drinking since that reduces folate levels in the body.

For Temu, it’s definitely cheap stuff, but it is real. DH did receive the items he ordered. They weren’t high quality by any means but they were good enough for his purposes.
 
True I tell other people that but don’t listen to it myself lol.

Still haven’t caught up. My legs are jelly. I’m pretty sure this was a 3h hold with minimal liquids unless I went to the bathroom on autopilot (possible). But it was pretty concentrated. Wondfo and frer definitely bfn. Nothing to squint at. CBE had a shadow then had a line at 15m, but I’m having a hard time telling if it’s just indent or a line. But I’m like 95% sure it’s colorless and an indent.

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Something is catching my eyes on the CB. When do you think you will test again?
 

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