General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[autumnal]

Oh no Dobs that sounds awful, fx your mom can take the FMLA. And the important thing is you fixed the mistake with the dogs and it'll be ok. Don't beat yourself up, you have a full plate going on. The clippers sound like a good idea

Gigs thank you.. we live in Ontario so no problem with homeschool laws, it's very lax. My younger 2 kids would be fine with it but my oldest (8 years) is extremely headstrong and obstinate. So I worry about him. He's already quite ahead in reading and penmanship and about average with math and spelling though so the hard part is over. As for where we will move, it depends where my husband will get a good job in a couple years I suppose.

 

[DobbyForever]

Thanks. I have to keep reminding myself that every time I get an animal impulse that I can barely keep my dogs happy/cared for.

Oh perfect ages! Once you get past that k-2 foundations then I feel like it’s a lot of pressure off lol. Is he headstrong with you or his teacher or both? Homeschool is so great because it’s more individualized and tangible teaching. He could have more say in what his school day looks like, which could make him more agreeable. Also always the option to homeschool the younger ones while your older goes to public school.

I want to take A somewhere but everywhere is outrageously crowded. And I’m so exhausted. I just don’t want to be around people

 

[DobbyForever]

This child needs to live on a farm lol

 

[shaescott]

Dobs hahaha I bet he would honestly love living on a farm, with all the animals and the space to run. Though you may worry he’ll run too far on a big property, I suppose.

Re: homeschooling, my goal is to be able to homeschool my future kids. That’s a huge reason I want to be a stay at home mom, and why DH is trying to get into this program, his salary outlook in like 2 years would be like $120k. We’d have to budget of course, but that’s very doable, even with today’s grocery prices, I feel. I do think unfortunately I’ll end up working per diem to keep my license just in case he were to lose his job (or some other tragedy, God forbid), hopefully I could get away with working one day a week or less. If he’s able to get this job, the first year or so will be pretty crap pay in comparison ($45-60k depending on location) so I expect to be working full time and likely putting our first child in daycare 2 days a week, unfortunately. I hate the idea of giving my kid to a stranger (and I don’t even have said kid yet) but you gotta do what you gotta do, and I make more than daycare costs, so it would actually be worth it money-wise.

Anyway, back to homeschooling… I’ve heard of a lot of great programs, you can even get faith based programs if that’s your jam (I plan to do that, personally). I follow a lot of Christian homeschoolers on Instagram, and they often share what programs they’re using and how they’re liking them. Personally I think once my kids hit high school, I’m gonna have to put them in online homeschooling for my sanity. I refuse to relearn calculus (I say that but I kinda liked parts of calculus, not gonna lie), and I most certainly will not be analyzing Charles Dickens again (that one is for sure accurate, I hated pre-AP English, it’s why I didn’t take AP English, a tale of two cities was the worst).

DH started the job training on Monday. The Week 1 Challenges are super easy, but they’re going to get very hard. I’m very reassured by the fact that he finds week 1 easy. If he found it hard, I would be very concerned that it was not starting at a beginner level, as he is a beginner and really needs the foundational stuff.

 

[DobbyForever]

If he had a dog like the cattle dog pittie mix (or two) with him, i wouldnt be worried. Kiah always puts herself between A and danger, and I know cattle dogs will f* s* up. The barn owner’s dad was saying that was why they bought their barn originally. The rule was that you could go anywhere on the land that you could hear the (literal) dinner bell and make it home within ten minutes haha.

Yeah good plan to keep your license active just in case.

Glad week 1 is going smoothly for him!

 

[HalfricanMa]

Halfrican when is your ultrasound again? I haven’t struggled with gaining weight since high school, personally, and I ate like a linebacker. Currently, I have discovered that eating an entire pint of ice cream after dinner is a fantastic way to put on weight (which was not my intention and now I’ve bought a treadmill). I think therapy would probably be a good thing regarding the emetophobia, even if you didn’t want to have another child. The kiddos you have are going to get stomach bugs once in a while, and having more coping skills is always a good thing.

Dobs ah geez sorry about the emergency surgery for your brother. How is he doing now?

Gigs my main goal for location is not living in a HOA. Hell no.

I’ve been losing so much weight because I cant run or do olympic weightlifting. I had to stop in April due to a knee injury during a race and it’s so swollen still. I need to go to the sports med training hospital to get it checked out again. Sounds strange but working out kept me with a strong appetite. Plus I’m thinking some of the weight loss is dropping muscle unfortunately.
My ultrasounds were Thursday. Everything showed normal.

 

[HalfricanMa]

We had our daughter’s first birthday party today. Both sets of grandparents are in town staying with us and we had her baby dedication at church as well. It’s been wonderful and keeping busy has kept my mind off of ttc so thats been nice.
@DobbyForever you sound very busy, but i’m sure you’re right about your boy enjoying the farm life!
@shaescott how wonderful that you hope to homeschool future children. That’s our plan also and now that our first born is nearly 3.5yrs old, i’m learning more about it in preparation. What job training is your hubby doing again? Im sorry, i know you said at some point but i forgot. I pray it goes smoothly for him so you both feel that job security and also can feel comfortable to ttc.

 

[autumnal]

I'm glad your husband is doing well with his new job @shaescott that's wonderful. It sounds like you have a great plan

Happy birthday to your little girl @HalfricanMa !
You guys are so right about the homeschooling! I'll pray about it.

 

[DobbyForever]

So... you all know I struggled to put A on the 4h meds for school. They just said in his IEP that there's not much difference from morning to afternoon (sincer afternoon has more transitions and tends to be. less structured ie ELA and math tends to be in the morning vs social studies and science in the afternoon. But his psych approved him to move to a 6h or even 8h med. I've seen A medicated firsthand. It does wonders. If that's what you're after. I hate it. I hate watching how drowsy he seems and the loss of curiosity and energy, I HATE having to medicate him for things. The daycare is having such a tough time. If I moved him to 6h then technically that's about 8:15-2:15 (school isn't over) or the 8h from 8:15-4:15 (I pick him up at 4). I just don't feel like I should have to medicate him to attend aftert school child care. Like it's f-ing afterschool. Let the kids run and jump and sing and play. He got yelled at on Friday just for rolling a truck down the slide gently, which a different teacher said was ok. I had to bite my tongue before I cursed out the teacher or served her back her b*y tone. Anyway, idk. Like I'm saving it in my pocket for when they threaten to actually kick him out in writing as a hail mary stall but ffs. Would y'all do it?

 

[Jules8]

@DobbyForever I’m so sorry you’re going through that for A. I work with adults with autism, but I also have a nephew with ADHD and am friends with someone whose son had ODD. The medication question is always a hard one, especially when you know it’s not always them…it’s people that don’t have the time or patience to work with them or be consistent. I agree that A shouldn’t need it in play or relaxed settings. I understand school, but it’s not fair to make someone be drowsy to play. It also sounds like they are picking at everything because they don’t want to deal with it at all. My one client goes to program during the day and everything is fine til they have a bad day of behaviors then they shoot right to meds. It’s not going to be perfect 100% of the time. In fact, sometimes the suppression of the behaviors meds and having to keep it together at all times can backfire in to bigger behaviors. I hope you’re able to figure something out that works best, but I know the struggle.
@HalfricanMa I’m glad your ultrasound went well. I hope your daughter enjoyed her party!!!
@shaescott That’s great to think ahead! I would love to be a stay at home home maker and home school. It’s very very common in my area! I can’t due to my husband being injured a few years back and now I’m the breadwinner. I promise everything falls in to place…or you just go with what situations are put in your lap. I know you will do great when that time comes!
If I missed anyone, I’m sorry. I kind of slacked keeping up. It’s been a busy few weeks. I had my follow up ultrasound for my cysts and chorionic bump yesterday. Praise God, the bump is gone!!!! That was such a big relief. It seems the cysts have resolved or shrink as well, but they aren’t 100% because she couldn’t find my ovary. She tried hard because she was digging in with the ultrasound. Baby was measuring right on track. My bp was way high though. I was def anxious for the appt, but because of my history with pre-e I know I have to keep it in check. I haven’t been eating great so I know that’s my first priority. And now that the bump is gone I feel a little better about doing some walking. It had me so stressed because I didn’t want to aggravate anything.

 

[HalfricanMa]

Im so glad everything is looking in the up for you @Jules8! What a relief you must feel.