Indigo the husband whisperer ! Love it.
Oh well , sorry my turn to moan . It's a sort of mixed one actually but I know you girls will get it.
So we've been trying for 8 cycles now ( not as long as some but enough that I'm scared and confused at times ) sorry if a bit personal , but we've always had a great sex life , happy and fun. So of course hubby has known were 'trying' but I'm sure like a lot of people here hasn't realized how much ive been 'trying' . We talked about not wanting our sex life to become timetabled etc etc , but of course I know exactly ( well not always exactly ) but as close as I can the 'right' time. This morning I had a total melt down because ( warning poss tmi) we were dancing away and he pulled out at exactly the wrong moment
Of course I was super upset , Im day ten , got my first pos opk yesterday afternoon ( but now no ewcm ) have been drinking green tea which I hate , even took a little cough syrup etc then he did that.
So I'll get to the good bit. In some ways although bad timing it made me spill about everything ,
how I wasn't saying much in order to keep things as natural and spontaneous as poss etc etc . He
was surprised at how much I'd been worrying and keeping from him. We had such a great hour of
thrashing it out and came up with a plan that he would look at my 'maybe baby ' chart on my iPad ,
which is a very not scientific but general guide , so he can check when were on a green light day etc.
We totally agreed the green days would be bonus days but even if it was red and were up for it then so beit . It's such a hard balance , keeping things the way they always were but catching 'those' days . Equally we agreed even if it's a green day and were sick or tired or simply not in the mood
that we won't force. Having said that he's always in the mood , and I can make it work even of I'm not sometimes
So I guess , this needed to happen for us , and were closer for it . I really couldn't carry all this on
my own and I'm lucky he's the sort that wants to help
Funny these men though . There I am popping new supplements , denying myself our treat coffee ( our new machine is a major treat living somewhere where there are no nice cafes ) swigging grapefruit juice and green tea which Im not that keen on truth be told. Taking my temp and spitting on a scope every morning , and he still didn't cotton on to all that I was doing
Even when he's been for a sa test. They can be so un observant . I teased him saying at least I know I could get away with an affair or a crazy shopping habit or something !
I agree though , I don't think even the best hubbies invest the same amount of emotions and heartache. Not all of course , some are amazing and hurt too. Maybe they deal it with it in different ways ? Mine gets so cought up in the rest of our life sometimes.
My freak out did show me how much this was meaning to me too . How scared of missing that crucial moment , and how long each month feels . But at least we both have a clearer understanding. How could he 'get it' if I wasn't telling him.
Well , that's my moan , freak out , crazy moment. Thanks so so much for this thread , it means so much to have a place to go.
I'm a fish out of water not only where we live but I don't kow anyone else who's had ttc issues so those is a great find . Take care all of you