icsi in 2011?

[annie25]

yes fisher im off from today for two weeks for sure doc may give me longer but we shall see!

no more scans now straight onto egg collection they think i will have between 10-14 eggs by thier calculations i had 12 lasr rime so we shall see x what did u have last time? x

 

[fisher14]

Thats great you have 2 wks off

I had 20 follicles last time and got 10 eggs so im hoping i still get some gd eggs this time

Xx

 

[Lolly1985]

Oooh Annie and Fisher you both sound like you have some lovely follie numbers there So excited for you!! So nearly there and then the waiting starts and we will all have everything crossed for you! So glad you have each other to help try and stay sane!!

Well i'm going stupidly mental 12dp3dt and still running scared of testing I have taken the first step though and bought some last night. Then got DP to hide them as terrified I had jinxed everything The thing is this will be the first time I have tested with any kind of hope. Before I have tested when bleeding red or before allowed to start, so only ever when I knew it'd be negative. And when got together with DP I already knew my probs so we never did the whole testing thing each month then either. I still think someone is playing games and know if it is negative (which I still can't imagine it'd be anything else) I will hurt a lot more this time. Its so hard, but I know I just have to man up right???!!!! I'm out with MIL and SIL to walk their dog in the rain soon, maybe that will make me feel better.... Oh and major cramp yesterday morning, had to find an empty room at work to go and try and breathe through it. Then back to being fine, so confused!!!

Hi to the other lovelies, Gill, Tinks and Nayla. Hope you are all getting lots of lovely attention from your DH's and making the most of the weekend. Thinking of you all,

Love Lolly xxxxxxxxxx

 

[GillAwaiting]

Lolly I dont want to jinx it for you and say its looking good but that odd wet feeling is a good sign! In both my pregnancies I noticed lots of watery cm so this sounds like positive stuff to me. You are so stuck between a rock and a hard place right now. I feel for you. Taking the test is such a tough ride. No matter what happens, we are here for you and every one of us holding our breath and praying.

Annie and Fisher, you guys are doing great! What brilliant numbers for you. These last few days must be driving you nuts. It great that you are both at the same stage. The rest of us have such hope for you guys!!

Tinks you are such a trooper. It's so good that you can do FET in the new year. At least you have all the hubbub of Christmas in between to help the time pass and the possibility of being able to enjoy your Christmas drinks without any guilt. There's a good chance a few more of us here will be right there with you in the new year and please god 2012 will be the best year ever for everyone here.

AFM I did a final test this morning to be sure, bfn. It's absolutely fine. I got over it a few days back. Just wanted to make sure before i go off the progesterone and estrogen. No more crinone!! Fingers crossed for next Tuesday to get started rocking and rolling again. I had major dramas at work this week with management. Unfortunately I have no fear calling out bad decisions that effect my job. I work for local government and consider the local people and businesses my true priority and not so much egotistical politicians. Its a funny thing all of this fertility stuff, it toughens you up I think and shapes your priorities. Gives you a little less fear of what misery work people could inflict on you. We've all been just about as miserable as we can get! So while its been drama drama and noses out of joint, it's actually been a distraction and I didn't feel the last week passing by. I got to think about something else other than pregnancy and miscarriage for 5 minutes! Every cloud ...

 

[Nayla82]

Hi Ladies

Gill im very sorry for your result, Tuesday will be here soon and i pray you start 2012 with your dreams coming true!

Tink- Hope your doing well and and be kind to yourself Dont feel sorry for being down, whether its your first failed IVF or your fifth! the pain is still there and in sucks! Im so happy that you can start in Jan with the frosties x it will go soon here Xmas always goes fast!

Lolly- Everything is sounding amazing for you it really is! Im so happy that you have come this far! you deserve this so so badly you have been through so much and what an ending this will be!! Please please lord let it be a BFP xoxoxoxoxo Is it next week you will test?

Annie and Fisher loads of lovely follies its always nice to know theres alot of eggs for them to choose from, aww great your girls have each other!

AFM had a great week at work everyone was so nice and lovely to get back into things, i cant believe im happy to be back and the money will help!


Last night we watched Paranormal 3 what the hell! made my heart jump out of my chest!! not to advise when your in your 2 ww too too jumpy... everyone was jumping around me lol!

I cant believe im up so early wasting my extra hour sleep

Take care every one love to you all,,, and goodluck xxxxxxx

 

[annie25]

blinking heck nayla thats early i was up at 6.30 but lazed in bed til about nine!!

im in agony today now def not going into work tomorrow because i can barely walk! i have done nothing productive at all!
trigger is at 11.30 pm but what a bugger since the clocks went back it feels way later! thank goodness were nearly at egg collection! xxx

 

[Lolly1985]

Hi my lovely ladies.

Well sadly it was a bfn from me. Have started the horrible AF now (just to add insult to injury). I was very upset Saturday night, which is strange because deep down I always knew. I think it was the false hope it had given me. I didn’t imagine the cramps and the fact the bleeding stayed away so long. Horrible progesterone!! So adoption is now our dream and I guess it was always meant to be this way.

So are going to adopt and are going to an information evening a week Thursday. We are both excited, and kinda wanna get things moving asap. Don’t think that’ll be possible though and there needs to be a ‘grieving period’ in between failed treatment and starting the process so more waiting! But means we can hopefully have a great Christmas, take time together and then start the process next year sometime. So a long road ahead but I am excited, and always knew deep down that this was the path we would end up taking. We are thinking maybe to adopt overseas so we get a younger child. It costs then as you pay for translating documents, legal fees etc, but our families have said they will help us. Lots to think about but a positive step as at least we know there is a definite plan, and not a lot of maybes. We also are going to get married. It’s not the huge romance but it makes sense in every way. Love, a commitment, people can see we are a stable unit and I think it can mean more when going down this route. Maybe it’s wrong to get married as it makes ‘sense’ but we were always going to, it just makes the reasons even more valid. We thought we would ask for money as a wedding present to help us complete our family – pull at a few heart strings, we’ll make a fortune!!!

I know that I will no doubt be sad again, it’s all still sinking in. But I will be a mum, its just not the ‘normal’ way. But then none of this is normal. And as long as I can hold a child in my arms I know I will be fine. Whether its biologically mine or not isn’t a huge thing to me to be honest. I have looked after so many children over the years and have created amazing bonds. And these were children I saw a few times a week. This would be always as they will be our baby, and I know it will be just fine. I think the worst bit is the time as I am so impatient!! But I guess I am only 26, I just feel a lot older and I have been through a lot at a younger ages with all of this TTC. I know by 30, I will have a child, and hopefully a lot before then. DP is happy too which is a massive relief. He said now we know a massive weight has been lifted and he can just enjoy us again and stop worrying about treatment, health, appointments, side effects, heartache. Obviously the appointments side will start again but this is something definite, so somehow is different.

I want to thank you ladies for all your amazing support through my journey. You have been amazing.

Annie, you go with EC today, you deserve your forever baby and I am praying that right here right now is your time. You have been incredibly strong to o through this again and I admire that so much. Good luck with everything lovely, we are rooting for you.

Tinks, again I am so sorry that your first try ended in sadness. But you have more tries left, and two beautiful frosties waiting for you. What an amazing thought. I have heard people get success with FET after fresh cycles have failed, and I really hope you are one of them. I believe this will work for you, keep fighting hun.

Gill, all the very very best of luck for your ICSI cycle. You have made it this far and I hope this is your happy ending. You have been so so brave and are fighting so hard for what you believe in. I really hope that you get to hold your baby someday so soon. I know that you have adoption in the background if need be, and remember, that no matter how you get your child, when you hold them and look into their eyes it will not matter how they arrived, it will just matter that they are finally here.

Nayla, you need to prove to me lady that third time can be lucky! I know how much you need this and I need it for you. You have done so well to fight on and be strong again. You are back and work and looking to the future, which is just great. You can do this again, and you will have happiness lovely. Please stay strong but don’t be afraid to ask for help.

You ladies have been with me through all of this and I honestly couldn’t have done it without you.

Fisher, I am rooting for you, you deserve this so much and I will be keeping everything crossed that you have a lovely bfp staring at you from the dreaded pee stick very soon!!

T4B, thank you for your lovely support. You have been a start. Good luck for your second cycle, I want this for you, like all of the girls. You have a great outlook and your positivity in just what everyone needs. All my love to you.

Girls please don’t be sad for me as I think that is the worst thing. I am ok, I have great support network and I know can proudly say when the awkward ‘when are you having a baby question’ comes up, that we are going to adopt. I can’t wait to see their face and then show them how great it will be.

I honestly don’t know if I will be back on here yet. I want to see how you get on but at the same time I don’t know if it will help me come to terms with things. I hope you understand. I sincerely wish each and every one of you all the love and babydust in the world. Dreams do come true ladies, in lots of weird and wonderful ways!

Love Lolly xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[annie25]

oh lolly i know you said dont be sad but you just made me cry! i'm so so sorry that it didnt happen for you but i understand the need for time and and that you understand for your own sanity when enough goes at ivf were where you drew the line.

i will be thinking of you and your adoption plans and from this stength you are showing right now will be reminded that there are many beautiful children out there in need of an amazing mummy just like any of us on here! please remember that being a amazing mummy is not about giving birth and i know you will do this.

i hope that one day soon you will come back when you are feeling strong enough xxx

lots of love and hugs to you annie xxxxx

 

[annie25]

hi all,

i'm not coping as well as i thought i woukd with round to all the emotions from before have come to bite me on the backside!

i had egg collection yesterday and only under sedation it was the worst pain ever and i really really struggled with it. they were having trouble getting into my ovaries as they are very mobile so they were brutal to say the least! to top it all off the indignity of it all i got a pesserie pain relief put up my backside nice!!

im so so dissapointed that we only got 6 eggs this time as it really doesnt give us room for manovere and there are so many hurdles to overcome! last time we had twelve what could have gone wrong?

i have also been given eostrogen tablets to be taken three times daily up until bfn or 12 weeks pregnant as tmi i have a worrying amount of mucus i think they want to thicken my womb lining to reduce the chance of misscarriage. i could not wallk last night and im still struggling with pain now but it is a little better.

the hospital have phone me three times since once to check i was ok and the others to say all six eggs matured ok and this morning the even better news that all six of them fertilised! 100 percent fertilisation rate is very rare so im hoping that although we dont have the quantity we have the quality! maybe it's wishful thinking tho .........

 

[fisher14]

Annie im sorry you have had such a traumatic time it really is an emotional journey. The egg collection sounds awful think i have been really lucky as had mine this morning under a general anesthetic and didnt feel a thing. Im home now in bed and have no pain at all.
6 embies is great hope they develop nicely for you. Do you know when you are having them put back in yet?
I got 10 eggs this morning now just waiting for the dreaded call tomo to see how many fertilized.
Make sure you rest lots and hope ur other half is looking after you

 

[annie25]

aww fisher 10 eggs thats fab! well done! i bet you are so chuffed! im glad all went well and your resting up and as u said to me your hubbie is spoiling you too!

my last egg collection was ga and i now see why but if im honest my new clinic is amazing so on the ball and not like a conveyer belt like my old one so it's a small price to pay! i never suffered this pain after last collection tho or my d and c so it's is weird!

i hope that the six mini ninjas as i call them continue to grow well and that all yours do too! xx

 

[fisher14]

My hubby is spoiling me... he just went out and bought me a big bag of giant chocolate buttons lol
Hope ur mini ninjas do great
Hope the pain goes soon xx

 

[fisher14]

Annie how are you feeling today?
Im a bit uncomfortable today but im sure it will get better soon.
The hospital called this morning and we have 8 fertilized little embies
Im going in on saturday morning to have et.
Im trying not to get too excited but it really hard not 2 xx

Hope everyone else is ok xx

 

[Nayla82]

Oh Lolly my heart broke into a thousand pieces when i read your message im so so upset with that result... I was praying so so hard for you x Please please look after yourself and i love your spirit i truly do... I have said it over and over again you are one so the sweetest and caring people on here and you deserve nothing but happiness

I understood what you meant by being FREE again no more injections no more shit that comes with the journey it really is hell... Your going to be a superb mum you really are, I pray that the Adoption journey will be a quick one for you.. we all know that you will love this child like it is your own and it will be Your own xx I cant wait wait you send us pics of your new child xx
Hun mayb you dont want to hear this, but I have read time and time again when people adopt than 'boom' not long after a pregnancy?? Miracles do happen and wow you will be blessed xxxxxx
I do want to make you proud and be lucky 3rd time.. Hand on heart im trembling than what 4th 5th 6th and they keep saying badluck??? im so scared it will never ever work and i will be in the 'IVF Unexplained Category' My husband is really against starting in Jan he wants to wait till summer.. he thinks only now I have just got my marbles back and I want to punish myself all over again?? I keep telling him whatever the outcome I will be cool... but i know my heart will stop
Lolly please pop in when you feel ready we will all miss you dearly xxxxx

Tinks- Were all thinking about you

Annie- sorry that EC was painful but 6 really is a great number! from what I have read the less eggs they collect the stronger they are? My first IVF 5 Eggs than 5/5 Full House fertilised just like you! which means excellent quality! 2nd IVF 8 Eggs 6 Fertilised... Quality is v important with IVF... excited for you xxxxxxx

Fisher- Good Luck hun x

Gill- have you started? Hope this is it for you hun xxxxx

AFM My period came this morning, I had a strange calm didnt get upset we did time it like crazy, but hey who was I kidding... If my 1st IVF worked I would have been due this Sunday 6th November that hurts alot and a few girls i cycled with at the start of the year have had their babies... I want this to be over with now... it really is tiring

thank god weekends almost here xx

 

[annie25]

hi guys,

fisher im ok struggling with more pain i think i may have very mild ohss but im weeing ok so im keeping an eye on it

the clinic rang at lunch we have four embies two of which are looking really good. i think it is likely i will be pupo tmrw although they will confirm in the morning
xxxx

eight fertilised thats fab news hun well done you!! xxx

nayla sweetie i know that feeling well i should be nearly 32 weeks now and here i am nearly pupo from cycle two! i feel quite down about it. keep strong and if you feel ready go for it in jan hunni xxxxx

 

[GillAwaiting]

Hey Annie and Fisher, fingers crossed for you guys. How's it going? When are you guys having the eggies put back in?

Lolly, Im so so sorry to hear your news. You did everything you could possibly do. Fair play to you for looking forward to new plans and new opportunities. It's not easy. Please stay with us from time to time. You've been a tremendous support to all of us here and being honest, more of us here could be on the same path as you, we just haven't turned that corner yet.

Nayla, T4B's, Tinks, how are you all holding up? I hope you are all keeping busy and time passes for you quickly.

Sorry I havent been around to follow everyone's up and downs. Been looking after my sister's toddler as they deal with appointments for her husbands cancer and her depression/anxiety. It's been a mental time. I love my niece to bits though so Im always happy to have her around. It's been a real eyeopener as to how hard it is to have kids full time!! Im not complaining but definitely it's been a learning experience. Thank goodness for steriods or I would be half dead on my feet.

Im back on the stims. Had 1st scan yesterday. Doing ICSI to blastocyst and they are going to put 2 eggies back in. Back for scans next Mon/Wed/Fri. I hate to keep banging on about it but we are absolutely praying this works as the cost for this cycle is 6210 euro. I dont know what we will do if it doesnt work. Think we might have to re-mortgage to go any further. Im confident the clinic is doing everything they can to make this work. They even have DH on antibiotics to make sure he has zero wrong with his sperm. The steriods have my head now looking like a football. Happy to be putting 2 eggies back in (please, please god we have 2 to put back in). The other clinic would only have put in 1.

Nerves are starting to fray a little, I must admit!

 

[annie25]

hi guys,

the update is im PUPO! with twin embies! one perfect graded 4/4 8 cell and one 7 cell 3/4 so very good results! they will continue to culture my other embies to blast but it's looking unlikely they are gonna make it x

todays expeience was amazing in comparision to last time it was easy pain free(ish) and we saw our beautiful embies on the screen and then saw the flash of light on the screen as they left the catheter into my uterus! it was amazing! we even have scan pics of this so chuffed! they consultant said we could not have asked for a better embie and transfer and that my womb looks fab she seemed very positive about it all.

now all i need is alot of pma guys! xxxxx

 

[fisher14]

Oh annie im so pleased for ........so glad it went well x
Im going to be sending you lots of over the next two weeks!
I hope mine goes as well as yours tomo, i havent had an update today so hope they are still going strong.
Will update tomo xx

 

[fisher14]

Hope you are feeling ok today annie

I had my transfer this morning and it all went very well, i had 2 grade 1...8 cell embryos put back in and amazing we have 3 grade 1...8 cell embryos to freeze

We are so pleased as the last time we didnt have any to freeze.

Now just have to have lots of pma xx

Hope everyone is ok xx

 

[annie25]

yay fisher that is fantastic news im so glad you got some frosties and such good embies too!
just a waiting game now indeed.

ive just been led on the sofa all day taking it easy but i may venture out for an hour tmrw get some fresh air lol! so nervous! xxx