IVF BFP 'S .. The journey, the hope, the success.

[PostalMom]

Mizuno, I can completely understand how you feel. My Dh will be taking 3 weeks off as well but had informed me that he may still be working from home and going into the office from time to time. That's not really taking time off. Instead of getting upset, I opted to say ok. Who knows how he will react . I know he's excited and terrified. So I'll let his emotions be his for now. He may feel differently when the boys come. If not, that's when I'll lay the guilt on. To be honest, I may want him to leave for a bit. Lol. My Dh is not the touchy Feely type. He has been coming along touching my belly, just started talking and putting his head to my belly. It's sweet. He's come a long way. So I'm trying not too be to pushy about anything. I hope this helps you some. Just remember. . You can have what ever you want. .. just convince him that is his idea. . Is all about perspective. Hahahahaha

 

[Serenyx]

I have a question ladies, do you change your EED even when you know your conception day after IVF?

I'm glad your 20 week scan went well I was measuring a few days ahead at my dating scan but my hospital didn't change my dates as they said they never change EDD's when it is an IVF pregnancy as you are 100% sure on the date of conception which is obviously more accurate than the scan

Congrats!!! Have you named her yet?

We decided to call her Isabelle I know it is fairly common but it is the name we both kept coming back to and have liked for a few years now We are not quite 100% sure on her middle name yet but it will probably be Alexis (my main concern is that it is rather androgynous, but Isabelle Alexis flows so well imo). We call her Izzy for short

I need to go in for blood test next week cos my blood is rhesus negative .

Me and DH decided on names.... Aria and Florence...

Oh do they test you before giving you the Anti-D to see if you have actually developed antibodies? At 28 weeks I just got the option to have the jab or not, they never tested me. My LO is Rhesus positive so I needed another injection after birth

Those are lovely names - Aria was on our shortlist

Serenyx, congrats on your Lil girl! ! I bet is such a relief!

Yes it is such a huge relief Initially I was happy to go slightly over and only schedule the cesarean for then but my consultant discussed the risks so we opted to go for the more standard 39 weeks instead (well just over anyway). I am so glad we did as I can not imagine going over now! I would be a bundle of nerves

I hope your LO's stay in there for another few weeks - it will be here sooner than you think though I am now surprised with how fast it all seemed to go!

We went to our local hospital for a birth info.

I did reserve a spot for a birth preparation, baby care and breastfeeding classes. It's 10 hour intensive course in 3 days. My habby and go there when I am 8 months preggo!!! I couldn't get anything earlier. All classes are booked out!

Another plan is to visit a bigger hospital today. They also have a birth center in the same building. I am interested in that!

It sounds like a pretty nice place! Good luck with the visit today - I hope that goes well and you can then choose where you want to deliver

Since I was high risk I didn't really get a choice lol

I hope you enjoy your classes, we went to a couple and found them fairly informative

Dovkav, I have compression socks and love them.they are not the most fashionable things ever, so I wear them around the house or under long pants, but they really work. They are just like really tight knee-high socks and they have helped me on a long flight and after a long day of sitting/standing.

I am wearing mine at the moment It is standard at my hospital for all women who have had a cesarean to wear them for about 4-6 weeks post birth (in addition to Clexane for a week) in order to minimise the risk of blood clots forming

AFM - all good here, just plugging along. Physically I don't feel too bad, just really tired, but mentally, I'm exhausted and an wreck - emotional, can't concentrate, anxious, stressed... I don't know how I will get through the next 2 months of work (and I work from home). Anyway, I need some advice from you ladies - warning - long rant ahead! DH and I got into an argument over him taking a parental leave. Let me just say up front that he will take 3 weeks (vacation) after birth and will take a month (vacation) next summer to go on a road trip we are planning through the US. However, in Canada we have a year of parental leave (either mom or dad can take it), so I thought I'd go back to work at 10 months so that he can take 2 months to spend with the baby. The thing is, he is refusing to do it. I think that this would be a great opportunity for him to bond with the baby and really immerse himself into her care, but he keeps coming up with excuses like he might lose his job if he takes the time off, there's no one to take over his work, it will be too stressful for him knowing that the work is not getting done, etc. Now, he has a good job, but he is not a CEO or anything and he works for a large company, which I'm sure would not fall apart if he was gone for 2 months. I think these are all excuses for him not wanting to do it. We have several male friends who are taking time off work to stay at home with their babies and it upsets me that he won't do that. It's not even the fact that he won't get that bonding time with his daughter, but the fact that these other men are really looking forward to it and he just seems very scared and defensive when I bring it up. It's always, "it's not like I don't want to, it's just that my job doesn't allow it. It would be too stressful for me." Really???? Because it's not stressful for me at all. I put my career on hold, I went thorough all the injections and pain of IVF, now my body is going through some unpleasant (and permanent) changes and don't get me started on the labour, but taking 2 months off is too stressful for him??? I just can't believe that he won't take this opportunity to spend time with this baby that we so desperately fought for. Don't get me wrong - he is very supportive and I think he will be a great father - but I'm very disappointed that he basically flat out refuses to do this. Please tell me that I am unreasonable and that I'm overreacting! I don't want to constantly fight over this, but every time I think about him refusing to do this, I feel like he's basically saying "my job is more important than spending time with my daughter" and I am so disappointed in him. I mean we were both very career-oriented, but having this baby has changed my perspective and I guess I was expecting it to change his. So sorry for the long rant, but I just want to stop feeling this way because I don't want to resent him, but I'm not sure how to stop myself from being so angry. Can't even have a drink to relax

Sorry to hear this is stressing you out I must admit that even though I am not planning at the moment on using all of my maternity leave (the last 3 months is unpaid) I never actually considered asking DH if he wanted to use the remaining leave himself The main problem would be the fact he wouldn't be earning for those 3 months. I am curious now as to whether he would want to take the leave or not, as far as I am aware when my sister went back to work recently after having her DD the option of her partner taking the remainder of the leave instead never came up either.

My DH is currently on his 2 weeks paternity leave (with some holiday days tagged on to make it almost 3 weeks) but he is still checking his work emails daily incase they need him to answer any queries I'm not too worried though as I have to admit to checking mine once or twice myself (in my defence I am a teacher so wanted to know how my students got on in their recent exams!).

Don't be too annoyed at him, as I said I feel bad that I didn't even consider the possibility for my DH but I doubt he would take it up anyway. He is one of the senior managers so even taking these 3 weeks off is quite a lot for him to take at once but his work have been fairly good considering we had to see the high risk consultant every other week so he was taking a day off for that each time (he took it as holiday but still ...).

My breasts are extremely sore where my milk is coming in! I seem to be producing more than she actually needs at the moment - it is dripping sometimes I had to go and buy a couple of sleep bras yesterday after waking up to find wet patches on my bed where it had leaked overnight (I have nursing bras with lactation pads to prevent it during the day but forgot to consider night time ).

Hope you are all doing well

 

[mizuno]

Thanks serenyx and postal! I know I'm over reacting. DH is not really a super romantic/emotional type (neither am I), but I just thought that having the baby will have the same effect on him as it does on me. To be fair, he does not have a daily reminder that there is a new life brewing and probably does not have the same connection with the baby that I already have. Postal, I like your advice to wait and see what happens once the baby is here. I don't see him changing his mind though. I should focus on the positives - I can take full 12 months off instead of 10! When else am I going to get that chance?

 

[PostalMom]

Mizuno, that's right. He won't feel the way you do. But wait until he holds her, then something may click. I expect my Dh will be like that. By all means. . Enjoy a full year off. I'll be quitting my job. A job I've been at 7.5 years and it kinda sucks. But my babies come first. I want to raise them, not a day care. Plus in my area is over 150 a week per baby. Geesh! ! How can anyone afford that.

 

[PostalMom]

Hi... I'm in the hospital. I thought they were going to send me home when the contractions became iregular again. However, my cervical length has thinned to 1.8 , 1.9. So they admitted me. So far 2 bags of iv fluid. And i had my first of 2 steroid shots to develop the boys lungs. They usually do that as a precaution. But they can only do the one set and it only helps if they do it with in a week of delivery. So they must think I could go soon. I don't know how many days I will be staying. I do know they have to give me the other shot tomorrow night. So I figure at least 2 nights in the hospital. I just need to keep them in a bit longer.

 

[flagirlie7]

Good luck, postal! You are already at a good point but yeah each day helps a bit more. Keep us posted!

 

[Disneyfan88]

bizzibii - Congrats on passing your glucose test! Sorry to hear about the leg cramps. Sleeping with a pillow between my legs helped as it kept me from keeping my legs stretched out. I only got leg cramps when I straightened my legs and extended them too far. Hopefully it will get better for you. I love the names you picked!

mizuno - Hopefully your DH will come around to the idea of taking a little extra time for bonding. If not, you can take the extra time for bonding yourself. My husband took 2 straight weeks off and then split his 3rd week across multiple weeks so that he was working shorter work weeks (he took Mondays and Tuesdays off for the 3 weeks following the first 2). We weren't expecting that we'd spend pretty much the whole first week in the hospital, so it didn't really feel like I had him home to help out for as long. He's taking 3 weeks off at the end of the year when things at work slow down a bit. I go back to work at the beginning of January and already don't want to go back.

Serenyx - I love the name you picked out! So pretty. We named ours Audrey Elizabeth (we actually had the name picked out before we did the transfer ). I'm glad to hear that you are doing well on the milk production. Believe me, it's better to have extra than not enough. You can always try pumping a little if she's not draining the beast completely.

PostalMom - I'll be praying for you and your boys. Hang in there and try to relax (I know - easier said than done). Keep us posted.

 

[Serenyx]

Thanks serenyx and postal! I know I'm over reacting. DH is not really a super romantic/emotional type (neither am I), but I just thought that having the baby will have the same effect on him as it does on me. To be fair, he does not have a daily reminder that there is a new life brewing and probably does not have the same connection with the baby that I already have. Postal, I like your advice to wait and see what happens once the baby is here. I don't see him changing his mind though. I should focus on the positives - I can take full 12 months off instead of 10! When else am I going to get that chance?

I asked my DH this question this morning and whilst he said he would love to have 2 months off to look after her, it is not feasible so he wouldn't. It would be 2 months unpaid and whilst we are comfortable, that would stretch things a lot, also his work would not be at all happy with him taking 2 months off (even though they would have to let him). However as you say - focus on the positives - you get to take more time off

Hi... I'm in the hospital. I thought they were going to send me home when the contractions became iregular again. However, my cervical length has thinned to 1.8 , 1.9. So they admitted me. So far 2 bags of iv fluid. And i had my first of 2 steroid shots to develop the boys lungs. They usually do that as a precaution. But they can only do the one set and it only helps if they do it with in a week of delivery. So they must think I could go soon. I don't know how many days I will be staying. I do know they have to give me the other shot tomorrow night. So I figure at least 2 nights in the hospital. I just need to keep them in a bit longer.

I hope all goes well and the boys stay in for a little while longer x

Serenyx - I love the name you picked out! So pretty. We named ours Audrey Elizabeth (we actually had the name picked out before we did the transfer ). I'm glad to hear that you are doing well on the milk production. Believe me, it's better to have extra than not enough. You can always try pumping a little if she's not draining the beast completely.

Thank you We have liked the name for a long time but weren't 100% sure on the name until she was born as we did have a couple of others we really liked too.

I have a pump that I need to get out of the cupboard and try - I did attempt hand expressing but that was a dismal failure (I didn't have the patience to sit there for hours trying to hand express lol )

How is Audrey doing? I can't believe she is coming up for 2 months already!

 

[Disneyfan88]

Thank you We have liked the name for a long time but weren't 100% sure on the name until she was born as we did have a couple of others we really liked too.

I have a pump that I need to get out of the cupboard and try - I did attempt hand expressing but that was a dismal failure (I didn't have the patience to sit there for hours trying to hand express lol )

How is Audrey doing? I can't believe she is coming up for 2 months already!

The pump will definitely speed things along for you.

Audrey is doing great. She's very alert (has been since very early on) and has been holding her head up when she's on her tummy for a while now. She just went through a growth spurt this last weekend. I'm curious to see what her weight and length measurements are at her 2 month doctor visit. She's already growing up too fast! Haha

 

[PostalMom]

Disney, aww. You should post pics. They grow up so fast! I can't believe my boys will be here any time. Hopefully we can put it off a few more weeks. They put me on precardia, it's sipping my contractions. I just don't know how long I'll be in the hospital. I do still have sharp cervical pains. I'm hoping my cervical length isn't still shrinking.

 

[mizuno]

postal, hang in there! I hope your boys decide to stay in a bit longer. You are already at 32 weeks, right? So you're in a good place now. It must suck being in a hospital. We went on a tour of the labour and delivery facilities at my hospital and it's so dreary! I was really put off by how old and drab and, I must say, stinky, it was. Somebody on the tour said they felt like they were in Soviet Russia. Someone else said, as joke, that they will be considering a home birth. And this is one of the best hospitals in Canada. I wonder what the other ones are like. To be fair, they are in the process of renovating, but it won't be finished soon enough for us Ugh.

 

[MishC]

Mizumo - Hope you had DH have managed to get sorted.

Postal - How are you getting on? Are you still in hospital? How's your cervical length doing?

Disney - Glad to hear Audrey is doing well. I remember thinking when my daughter was 8 weeks that it had flow by! The first 6 month is like a whirlwind!

 

[PostalMom]

Mizuno, that sounds awful. I'm lucky. My hospital is very nice, clean, great nurses. My Dr said I have to stay another 24 hours, then we will see. A social services lady who helps with perinatal depression made her round to let me know of services and said. .. so I see you will be staying with us a while. . I was like. . I hope not. . Does she know something I don't? Because it's twins you don't get any definite answers. It's all ... well you ARE having twins. .. or we just need to wait and see. . Or... well your body is gearing up. . But nothing that days hey maybe you hand a week left maybe 3. I don't expect the answers to be perfect, but some indication would be nice. .
My nipples are sore today. . This is new. My cervix keeps getting sharp knife like pains, sitting upright is hard because of the boys heads pushing down. . And Robbie is very low, right pushing on the cervix.

 

[flagirlie7]

Postal, what hospital did you chose?

 

[PostalMom]

I'm at St Josephs women's hospital

 

[PostalMom]

I've been told I'm being kept until Tuesday now. I was taken off of the procardia. My main dr didn't know why I was put on it anyway. It worked at first.. then it seemed not as much. So i stayed have 5-6 contractions an hour again. They will check my cervix again on Tuesday to see.. if it's the same I may go home. . If it's shorter or dilated they will keep me even longer. They are focused on me getting to 34 weeks. Then we can leery the babies come. There's not much they can do any way, just because it's twins.

 

[Disneyfan88]

PostalMom - I'm praying for you and your boys. I hope they will continue to stay put for at least a couple more weeks.

 

[Disneyfan88]

Mizuno - sorry to hear about the hospital. Are the rooms at your hospital at least private?

 

[dovkav123]

Postalmom, I know staying in the hospital is not fun, sorry about that.
My girlfriend's baby stopped growing at 7 month, so she had to stay for the whole month in the hospital, in bed rest and fetal monitoring. She had compression stockings on to reduce the blood clotting. She stayed with another woman and she was happy about it cos chatting with somebody was helpful for the countdown....

mizuno, I got dissapointed about your hospital in Canada. I am sorry you have no other choice but deliver your baby there.
I visited my small hospital and it's really cozy, colourful walls, they have a tub for birthing(walk in, not climb in), family rooms, little breakfast buffet. My goal is to visit a hospital in big city, they have a birthing center in the same building, if something goes wrong I can be rolled down to a hospital.

MishC, how are you? How is your placenta? Did your kidneys got better?

I am doing fine. My baby is moving a lot through the day. I am in such relaxed time of my pregnancy, I know he is healthy, I am feeling OK, that is all important. I do have pain in my legs, standing hurt, sitting hurt longer, walking is good and I do walk a lot, but in the evening I fell finished. I elevate my legs, all pain is gone then. My dr. prescribed me compression stockings, I am still thinking if I should get them or not.
I didn't gain a kg last week, I feel good about it. I have gained 8kg, I was worried I growing too fast.
Yesterday my tummy got really hard for a few seconds. WAS it a Braxton contraction?

 

[PostalMom]

Dovkav, if your belly got hard around your belly button... then it very well could be the start of bh. They say if it gets hard and feels like your forehead than its a contraction/bh. My contractions sometimes stay with a feeling of breathlessness, maybe a, but of nausea. Then the tightening gets stronger and stronger. .. sometimes the pain will go around to my list back as well. My contractions are only coming 2-3 an hour right now but they are stronger. I just need to make it 10 more days! I'm so nervous. Our lives are about to change. I'm ready to not be pregnant any more but nervous about my new role. . My breasts are so ready. They leak. The nurses are surprised that my breasts are all ready. Moo lol