Long Term Trying To Conceive Vent Thread

[Myshelsong]

Stupid F@$&ing period!

 

[Hope3]

So sick of this lttc. Surely over 3 years is enough. I'm turning into a bitter, miserable cow. X

You and me both, Lazy. You and me both.

Same here. I'm totally fed up. The stress has finally got to me and I've been signed off work for a couple of weeks. LTTTC has sucked the life out of me and turned me into an emotional wreck. I know that age is against me but why can't I be one of those who beats the odds to have a baby at 44/45?

 

[madtowngirl]

Same here. I'm totally fed up. The stress has finally got to me and I've been signed off work for a couple of weeks. LTTTC has sucked the life out of me and turned me into an emotional wreck. I know that age is against me but why can't I be one of those who beats the odds to have a baby at 44/45?

I hope I'm not being patronizing, but my age is really starting to be a huge concern for me, too. I hate that feeling, there's nothing I can do about my age.

But I will keep my fingers crossed that you beat the odds, Hope3.

I feel like I'm just a giant magnet for other people's BFPs.

 

[Hope3]

You're not being patronising, it's only natural to be concerned but conception seems to be such a lottery. When I saw my GP she said don't give up as she'd seen a woman that day who was pregnant at 46. Then again when I asked if the woman already had children she said that she did.

I hope you get your BFP.

 

[k4th]

Facebook!!

As if it's not bad enough seeing scans, pregnancy announcements and seeing pics of newborns. Now "you" are posting about all the negative things about having a newborn. Daily. You were once in my shoes - I really REALLY would have thought you'd either be much more grateful or at least more sensitive.

 

[Lazydaisys]

It Always amazes me. It's like some people forget.

I do have a lovely though friend who struggled to conceive and now whenever she moans she always makes a point of saying how incredibly thankful she is to have them. I asked her if the pain of struggling to conceive was cured when you finally get pregnant and she says you remember it clearly. In fact it's worse to look back on.

I won't be posting anything in Facebook until I have a baby in my arms and then I will spare a thought for people struggling and not moan or whinge. Xx

 

[DBZ34]

Not saying anything on fb until the baby is born is a good idea. I was also contemplating just a sentence saying "We're having a baby, due x" and then follow that up with the obligatory "Baby x arrived on this day. Everyone is doing well."

I've also thought about detailing our journey in my post, so something like "3+ years, 4 miscarriages, 5 angels later, we finally get to announce that we are having a baby! Due x" But I'm not sure DH would like sharing all of that with people he doesn't know personally.

One of my friends did a post where she said that she knew that some of her friends were dealing with infertility (and there were probably more that she didn't know about), so feel free to block her as needed, she would understand and she apologized if she made anyone upset with her announcement. Then she made a special facebook group to post pics and statuses in before and after the baby was born. You had to ask to join the group....I didn't. And it was nice to not have all of that thrown in my face on a daily/weekly basis. It was a nice gesture.

But I definitely won't moan or whinge about my kid if I can help it...I'm going to remember where I came from and what I went through and even when they drive me crazy, I'm going to be incredibly grateful for them and I will thank the Lord daily...because if I get pregnant and have a baby, it will be a miracle for sure.

 

[k4th]

Thanks lazydaisys & dbz34. Hope you're not waiting too much longer before not sharing an exciting status & :babydust:

 

[Lazydaisys]

I just think you wouldn't walk around showing everybody your photo albums so why put everything on facebook . Having said that I enjoy the (odd) snap of my cousins children that live in a a different country occasionly.

Don't get me started on the pics of children on Christmas cards. I will never do that!!! You are stuck with them. It's difficult to throw photos of children away and a lovely reminded of what you are missing at a difficult time of year... Oh dear I went off ranting again lol xx

 

[Miaw]

I'm feeling so sad today and so tired of it all.

And I beyond tired of going on Netflix to watch my T.V shows that I like and then in the suggestions there is always movies with babies, always the same shit too... People that did not want to be parents stuck with a baby.

Why can't they stop making stupid movies like that?

I can't watch anything with a baby or young kids in it. I stick to watching things far away from that. Even seeing advertisement with a baby picture makes me cry.

Sometimes I wish I did not want kids, that way I would not have to care.

 

[nobump]

Princess kate is going to be all over the news tomorrow. She is going to her first public engagement.... think u will be avoiding the kitchen at work with news on 24/7.

 

[Kallie3000]

I'm feeling so sad today and so tired of it all.

And I beyond tired of going on Netflix to watch my T.V shows that I like and then in the suggestions there is always movies with babies, always the same shit too... People that did not want to be parents stuck with a baby.

Why can't they stop making stupid movies like that?

I can't watch anything with a baby or young kids in it. I stick to watching things far away from that. Even seeing advertisement with a baby picture makes me cry.

Sometimes I wish I did not want kids, that way I would not have to care.

I know exactly how you feel. Some of my favorite books, movies, and tv shows have a pregnant character. Either it is their 'happily ever after' (how come I don't get one?) or it was an unwanted 'oops' (how does that whole oops thing even happen?! I can't TRY to have an oops!)

 

[Lazydaisys]

I want an oops!!!! Does anybody watch hollyoaks? In one storyline there's somebody having ivf , where they are so far off the mark its untrue and now that's turned into a surrogate storyline. Whilst two single women get pregnant that werent even trying. I know it's not real. But it's in my living room and I used to watching it.

I can no longer watch teen mom, one born every minute. Here comes baby or any baby product advert or worst still the clear blue ovulation test adverts. Lol

 

[Myshelsong]

... Since when does every car commercial feature a child or a pregnant lady?

 

[Kallie3000]

... Since when does every car commercial feature a child or a pregnant lady?

Even a local dentist office had a radio ad talking about how if you were pregnant or planning to become pregnant you should get your gums checked, because periodontal disease can cause problems with your baby.

So, scare tactics, and reminding me that I've been planning for a while now?

Thanks dentist. Thanks.

 

[longing]

Just needed to put this somewhere really.

Spent most of the day crying. It's my day off work and have done almost nothing except cry. Why is my oh not supportive? He says we are ttc and wants children but we haven't had sex for months. Its 5 years ttc this month, I am nearly 33 he is 42. We don't have time on our side. I desperately want to be a mum. He won't go to the docs about it. What do I need to do? My friends are all lovely but gloriously wrapped up in their family life. I am finding it hard to cope. Feeling alone.

 

[Hope3]

Sorry your OH doesn't understand what you're going through. Is he expecting you to conceive by immaculate conception?

I was listening to a radio programme this week where the male presenter talked about his issues as he was the reason he & his wife couldn't conceive. I'll find the link & post it. It might help your DH to see how other men have dealt with infertility.

 

[Hope3]

Here's the article https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-412273/Im-infertile--look-happened.html

Your OH could go to the LBC radio website to listen to the show. It aired on Monday and was called "Why don't we talk about male infertility?" You have to subscribe though.

My DH doesn't talk much either. When I get upset he doesn't really know what to do. We had a talk the other day and he said that he's angry too but mostly keeps it in. When his cousin sent a photocard of her newborn (I've already had a vent on here about that one) my DH ripped it up and threw it in the bin. To be honest I felt like doing the same but didn't have the guts. I hate that I'm so bitter but I am.

You still have time on your side. Hopefully your OH will find the courage to go with you to the GP to talk about getting tests.

Sending & best of luck.

 

[longing]

Here's the article https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-412273/Im-infertile--look-happened.html

Your OH could go to the LBC radio website to listen to the show. It aired on Monday and was called "Why don't we talk about male infertility?" You have to subscribe though.

My DH doesn't talk much either. When I get upset he doesn't really know what to do. We had a talk the other day and he said that he's angry too but mostly keeps it in. When his cousin sent a photocard of her newborn (I've already had a vent on here about that one) my DH ripped it up and threw it in the bin. To be honest I felt like doing the same but didn't have the guts. I hate that I'm so bitter but I am.

You still have time on your side. Hopefully your OH will find the courage to go with you to the GP to talk about getting tests.

Sending & best of luck.

Thank you so much. Men are such different creatures aren't they? I will give it a go. And well done for having a go at your cousin. I think people just have no idea how hard this is. Sending big love back xxx

 

[Kallie3000]

Here's the article https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-412273/Im-infertile--look-happened.html

Your OH could go to the LBC radio website to listen to the show. It aired on Monday and was called "Why don't we talk about male infertility?" You have to subscribe though.

My DH doesn't talk much either. When I get upset he doesn't really know what to do. We had a talk the other day and he said that he's angry too but mostly keeps it in. When his cousin sent a photocard of her newborn (I've already had a vent on here about that one) my DH ripped it up and threw it in the bin. To be honest I felt like doing the same but didn't have the guts. I hate that I'm so bitter but I am.

You still have time on your side. Hopefully your OH will find the courage to go with you to the GP to talk about getting tests.

Sending & best of luck.

This is a really helpful article, thank you.