LTTTC #1 - Support Group *Please share your story

[flou]

Hi Kallie I personally think after what is considered to be average to get pg, if you have gone longer then your lttc. Even though it can be perfectly normal to take longer than a year to conceive, its just not what most people experience. My DH and I have had our fertility testing and all is good and it still took us 19 months to conceive the first time and 11 months the second time. I hope your stay on the lttc boards is a short one and you get your bfp soon!

 

[flou]

Hi ladies I've just had a big surprise a bfp! I can't believe it! I'm also incredibly scared and nervous. Please stick!

 

[Swtpinkbabi]

Hi ladies I've just had a big surprise a bfp! I can't believe it! I'm also incredibly scared and nervous. Please stick!

Omg Flou, congratulations . Sticky bean!!!!

 

[Myshelsong]

Fingers are all crossed for you flou! May you have a healthy happy nine months.

Hi Kalli, I love that area. Going back home to Kitchener Ontario tonight. So full of cowboy food!

 

[madtowngirl]

Congratulations flou! I hope you have a h & h 9 months!

 

[MrsAM]

Dear All

Married since 2007 came off the pill 2008 and been TTC ever since then.

Diagnosed with pcos and a blocked left tube in 2011.

6 failed clomid cycles i.e. I ovulated, used the trigger shot and BD'ed at the right time and still couldn't conceive.

Had one IUI which failed so consultant recommended me to go straight to ivf.

Just completed the rollercoaster ride of my first cycle of ivf, felt like I have been on it forever! Basically it is now 7 days past embryo transfer and I am bleeding and clotting and feel like my heart is broken. Really had high hopes but to be honest I could not help but think negatively...I have never been pregnant so made me think why should I get pregnant now and all sorts of other irrational guff.

My PT is due this Saturday 19th july and tbh I feel like what is the point just want to go straight to popping in some of my frozen embryos now! They better put in at least 2 this time but they might not as they are so worried about multiple births.

Now I know my eggs and DH's sperm don't actually hate each other and they actually came together into a beautiful little blastocyst gave me hope but now I'm like maybe it's all my wombs' fault..! Lol.

Really thinking of going to that mayonnaise injection doctor I just want a baby like yesterday please God!

So anyway that's my LTTTC story. Thanks for reading.

 

[flou]

MrsAM I'm sorry your journey has been a long rollercoaster ride. I hope you get your little one soon.

 

[MrsAM]

Thank you Flou. Congrats on your bfp hope it sticks

 

[panda fan]

Congratulations, Flou!

Hi MrsAM. That is great you made a blast. I just started at CCRM and I went in with very little hope and they said that if you've made a blast, they consider that a very good sign that pregnancy can be achieved by IVF!

So I just got back from tests at CCRM. Getting ready for my 4th IVF cycle. First one at this clinic. The Dr told us that I have a very large hydrosalpinx on my left side. My RE here in RI had said she didn't think it was actually a problem and CCRM Dr doesn't understand why she though that. He thinks it is very likely why the first 3 IVFs failed. Has to use Essure to correct it because I already have too much scar tissue, but he's going to try to plug the tube at the same time as retrieval so I don't have to do anesthesia twice. They will freeze my embies and I have to wait 3 mo for tube to heal over before transfer, but hopefully I'll have some healthy blasts waiting for me after this.

 

[MrsAM]

Hi Panda Fan (as an aside I abso-bloody-lutely adore pandas so...good taste on your part )

Thanks for saying that about the blasts, has made me feel a smidgeon better, but I can't help obsessing over my womb now and wondering why it didn't hold my little potential negativity hey what a soul sucker.

Anyway so glad your doc is actually going to do something about your hydrosalpinx. I have only done some cursory research on it as I thought maybe my blocked tube was also of the hydrosalpinx variety and the overwhelming anecdotal and nicely summarised peer reviewed paper view is that hydros should be dealt with to improve your chances of conceiving via ivf....

Incidentally I was concerned my blockage was a hydro and asked the doc who did my embryo transfer who said it was not but seemed quite put out that I even asked about it giving a kind of derisory snort when I said I had researched it online! Well excuse me but it's my messed up tube I think I have the right to ask...sheesh.

It's always better to ask don't care what the nhs thinks of my incessant questioning anymore lol.

Really hope your fourth cycle works out. Wishing you all the best.

 

[Swtpinkbabi]

Hi Mrsam and Panda. I just wanted to respond to your stories because they are similar to mine. I also have Pcos and had a hydrosalpinx in my right tube. We did several cycles of Clomid with and without IUI's before ever knowing about the blockage. When I switched RE's in 2010, that's when we found out about the hydro. My doc also told me that it can leak some kind of fluid into the uterus and cause conception to not occur. We tried more clomid, and always had follies, but never conceived. In 2012 I had my right tube removed because she said it would be better to have it done before trying ivf. We took a fertility med break after the surgery for about a year and a half. Started up again in April and trying Femara for the first time. We finally got our bfp on the first cycle of actually trying after removing the hydro. My doc said she's pretty sure that the hydro was causing my conception issue.
I wish you both the best of luck in your journeys, baby dust to you!

 

[MrsAM]

Hi Swtpinkbabi

Thank you for sharing your story.

In my case, they said i don't have a hydrosalpinx but still the anxiety of my twisted tube preventing conception lurks.

Anyway I will make sure to get all the facts and figures from them the next time I see them. The problem is they are always rushing around and don't seem to want to explain as much as they really should.

 

[Swtpinkbabi]

Hey MrSam, I hope they give you all the info you need to make a decision. I was really nervous about getting my tube removed. Mainly because whenever I ovulated I always felt it on the side where the tube was being removed. My doc explained to me that because the tubes aren't attached to the ovaries they can pick up eggs from either side. I searched several forums and found that it was true for many people, so that made me feel better.
I hope they find what works for you and you get your bfp soon .

 

[Myshelsong]

Hey ladies, hope we are all doing well this week.
Just had my hubby's bday weekend and man it was full. Went to the beach, movies, dinner out, his 20th high school reunion! It was crazy. And to top it off I didn't even get crazy sad when I say everyone there with there two plus kids running around. It was nuts. Going to be positive this week, but awaiting af to show. Ovulated later this cycle so don't know when af is arriving, hopefully soon or not at all is all I can say.

Wishing you all the best

 

[flou]

Myshel I'm glad the reunion went well. Keep positive!

 

[wtbmom_tx]

Hello, may I join your group? I was reading the first page, until I realized it was started last year. Well let me tell you all my story (if you all don't mind.. I seem to feel that we understand what we are going through)..
So DH and I are 29. We have been married for 9 yrs (everybody though we were marrying so young cause I was pregnant.. I now wish that were the case) So, I've had three ectopic pregnancies, one tube ruptured and the other had to be removed after the two ectopics. We were told I could get pregnant through IVF, so DH and I saved money for the procedure. We were so confident we would get a positive, and to our surprise it was a BFN!!!
We waited a year and tried it again, another negative, but this time we had 3 frosties, so we decided to do a FET right away. We got a BFP, but it ended up being a chemical.. We just did our last FET in June and got a BFN. Doctors have not told me why it hasn't worked, because they don't know. They say we are both healthy and don't know why it isn't latching on.
Don't know if it's me or any of you feel the same way, but I usually get mad when I find out certain people are pregnant..
I've gone through friends pregnancies and I haven't felt bitter about it, on the contrary I'm happy for them (I guess because they also went through a lot to try to get pregnant).
I have felt bitter towards one person, and I feel bad, but I can't talk to anyone close to me, because I don't think they'll understand..

 

[wtbmom_tx]

It's been over two years for us, first year after marriage we were NTNP, but we traveled a lot and partying so we figured we just weren't timing it correctly (even tho I have ovulation pain and every period is 26-29 days, so I know when I'm fertile..i guess I was just lying to myself). Last summer we really started trying and this spring we started doing all the blood work and SA..so far everything is perfect. Now we have our first appointment in a fertility clinic this Monday...I am beyond scared. I feel like I'm broken and I don't want to hear it from the doctor. I always thought this would happen naturally and I'd have kids before my 30's...now I feel useless and kind of embarrassed. I know I shouldn't.

I've stopped going to baby showers and every time a friend of mine tells me she's pregnant (which seems to be every month!) I cry for about a day....I only have two friends who aren't pregnant or have kids yet, but I'm sure they will soon! I am becoming angry, jealous and just a horrible person. I've never been like this. I'm very close with my mom but she just doesn't understand, she keeps telling me it's okay, don't worry about it. So she doesn't even know half of my struggles. I wish I had people ask me how I feel and talk to me about it, first I thought no one cared but I think everyone is just scared to ask. I wish I had the will power to stop thinking about it so much and just relax, enjoy life...I'm only 27 by the way...I feel like I shouldn't be so depressed about this. My husband has been very good overall, he actually really wants kids, but he doesn't show his emotions like me, so he doesn't understand why I can cry at a drop of a hat.

I'm sorry about this long post, it just feels good to tell my story! I want to stay positive like all of you! Hopefully I'll be able to be happy again soon.

I just asked to join this group as well.. As I was reading your post I sort of saw myself.. I have felt jealous about certain people who get pregnant.. I also feel embarrassed when people ask if I have kids, why I haven't had kids, or when they ask my hubby. We are both 29 and have been married for 9 yrs. There are some people who don't understand what we are going through, and of all our friends I've had two who want to know more about what I'm going through and ask me questions. I feel like I can talk to them, but can't express my feelings since they have kids and I wouldn't want them to think I feel jealous or am envy of them (which i'm not).
Recently I did feel mad, jealous, envy, all the worse feelings one can have because my cousin got pregnant. Sorry for venting but, I really need to let this out..
So my dad told me my cousin was pregnant, and I was like ok whatever. What got me so MADD, was that he was like, "I'm sorry she got pregnant".. To this day i'm still annoyed at him for how he said it.
She invited me to her baby shower, but I refused to go. See she's the kind of person who parties everyday, drinks, smokes, and doesn't have a serious boyfriends. So when she announced she was pregnant I couldn't believe it. My DH and I have spent thousands of dollars on IVF, haven't gone on vacation or looked for our dream home because we want a baby. We have our first home, which we got when we first got married, but always thought we move out after five years, and haven't been able to because all our savings is going to IVF..

 

[madtowngirl]

Welcome wtbmom_tx, I hope you get your rainbow soon.

 

[Haffy]

Hello everyone

I'm new here, just registered today. I came across this website through my google searches related to ttc/ltttc. I posted a thread but all was quiet there. Anyway I came across this thread before (before I'd even signed up to B&B) & feel I belong here

I'll just tell you a little about my situation. I am 23 years old & I think I've known that there may be something wrong with me when it comes to conceiving for a long time now. I have been married for nearly 1 yr & 3 months now & no sign of pregnancy as has been the case for many years (maybe more than 6). No mc's, no cp's nothing.. (not uses to the acronyms yet). I went to the Dr about it his month & I'll be having a blood test soon to check hormone levels and what not (Can anyone tell me what I can expect next?). This situation is just consuming me at the moment and my DH does not even know to what extent or anything, I don't want to get him worried until solid answers come up.

Anyway, I think I just wanted to come and connect with others who are going through the same kind of thing & I feel right at home here. I never realised so many are going through this struggle

 

[Haffy]

It's been over two years for us, first year after marriage we were NTNP, but we traveled a lot and partying so we figured we just weren't timing it correctly (even tho I have ovulation pain and every period is 26-29 days, so I know when I'm fertile..i guess I was just lying to myself). Last summer we really started trying and this spring we started doing all the blood work and SA..so far everything is perfect. Now we have our first appointment in a fertility clinic this Monday...I am beyond scared. I feel like I'm broken and I don't want to hear it from the doctor. I always thought this would happen naturally and I'd have kids before my 30's...now I feel useless and kind of embarrassed. I know I shouldn't.

I've stopped going to baby showers and every time a friend of mine tells me she's pregnant (which seems to be every month!) I cry for about a day....I only have two friends who aren't pregnant or have kids yet, but I'm sure they will soon! I am becoming angry, jealous and just a horrible person. I've never been like this. I'm very close with my mom but she just doesn't understand, she keeps telling me it's okay, don't worry about it. So she doesn't even know half of my struggles. I wish I had people ask me how I feel and talk to me about it, first I thought no one cared but I think everyone is just scared to ask. I wish I had the will power to stop thinking about it so much and just relax, enjoy life...I'm only 27 by the way...I feel like I shouldn't be so depressed about this. My husband has been very good overall, he actually really wants kids, but he doesn't show his emotions like me, so he doesn't understand why I can cry at a drop of a hat.

I'm sorry about this long post, it just feels good to tell my story! I want to stay positive like all of you! Hopefully I'll be able to be happy again soon.

I just asked to join this group as well.. As I was reading your post I sort of saw myself.. I have felt jealous about certain people who get pregnant.. I also feel embarrassed when people ask if I have kids, why I haven't had kids, or when they ask my hubby. We are both 29 and have been married for 9 yrs. There are some people who don't understand what we are going through, and of all our friends I've had two who want to know more about what I'm going through and ask me questions. I feel like I can talk to them, but can't express my feelings since they have kids and I wouldn't want them to think I feel jealous or am envy of them (which i'm not).
Recently I did feel mad, jealous, envy, all the worse feelings one can have because my cousin got pregnant. Sorry for venting but, I really need to let this out..
So my dad told me my cousin was pregnant, and I was like ok whatever. What got me so MADD, was that he was like, "I'm sorry she got pregnant".. To this day i'm still annoyed at him for how he said it.
She invited me to her baby shower, but I refused to go. See she's the kind of person who parties everyday, drinks, smokes, and doesn't have a serious boyfriends. So when she announced she was pregnant I couldn't believe it. My DH and I have spent thousands of dollars on IVF, haven't gone on vacation or looked for our dream home because we want a baby. We have our first home, which we got when we first got married, but always thought we move out after five years, and haven't been able to because all our savings is going to IVF..

Hi wtbmom_tx

I know the feeling of embarrassment too. When we hear of someone being pregnant after being married for less time than me, I actually feel embarrassed & get paranoid thinking my mother is law is probably wondering about me or that inside she may feel disappointed *sigh* how I would love also love to make the family happen by giving them a grandchild/niece or nephew etc..

I think for some people, the idea of infertility doesn't even pass their mind because for them, pregnancy has come by so easily & so they've never had to look into it & think about it.Others probably don't want to hurt by bringing it up and asking about it