May Marvels 2018

[cheluzal]

We had our shower yesterday! Our nursery is racecar and my besties did SUCH a great job! My favorite was the little details, like signs by food saying "PIT STOP" and "FUEL STATION" and the paper plates in green, yellow, and red all arranged to look like stoplights!

...but I am paying for it now! I didn't drink much at all yesterday and have been contracting since last night. I'm trying to recoup my dehydration and force water (ugh, I hate water anyway) and hubs got me Gatorade. They are slowly going away but it was every 5-10 minutes all night. Not labor since they never got harder but oof, so tight and painful.
I missed church because I was exhausted!

 

[Reiko_ctu]

Chel what a fun shower! I hope you felt celebrated xx. Rest up today!!

 

[Reiko_ctu]

Reiko I have no idea how you did it. I shaved my legs for the first time in months the other day and it about did me in XD

I was definitely flying blind the majority of the time lol! Thank goodness I didn’t catch any skin XD

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

Chel your shower sounds like it was great! I hope you rested up yesterday and are feeling better today.

Reiko you are a braver woman than I I haven't laid hands on my razor for weeks now. And the lady garden is a lost cause til this kid is out. Hubs isn't bothered, we're not having sex anyway. It's just me being driven mad haha.

Happy 30 weeks to me. Final 10 weeks. Hecking heck! It really feels like the final stretch now. Nearly single figure weeks left.

Back to school for us. It's warmed up, the snow is mostly gone. The paths are clear and DS needs to get out of the house and I need some peace

It's 4 years today since my mum died. My bathroom scales shattered when I picked them up this morning. I don't believe in supernatural stuff but it's a bit of a weird coincidence. Maybe she's telling me not to obsess over my weight lol.

I'm basically gunna spend today allowing myself to be sad, I find it easier to deal with it's the rest of the year if I let myself have the day to just feel my grief.

Hope everyone has a good Monday!

 

[ricschick]

Reiko I do feel huge!!! And definitely woddling now! And by the end of the day I’m sore. The hospital called this morning and I’m having my growth scan today at 4.30! So I’m excited to see her again, I’ve never had a scan this late in pregnancy so I’m excited to see what she looks like. Just hope dh can make it out of work in time.

Broken oh I’m sorry to hear that, I hope your ok xxxx

Cheluzal your shower sounds lovely!! Did you get lots of nice things for baby? I tend to get a lot of BH if I’ve had a busy day too! Hope your feeling refreshed today.

When’s everyone packing their hospital bag? I’ve not bought anything for it yet so I best start stocking up!!

 

[ReadynWaiting]

Broken-I’m sorry your heart is hurting. Grief is a strange thing as it pops in and out. I take solace in knowing they are always with is even if I can’t see or touch them. Be gentle with yourself and take the time you need.

Ricschick-I’ve been waddling for a couple weeks off and on but now it’s all day everyday. Lol. So excited you get to see baby today!

Anyone feeling miserable with their family? My fam doesn’t seem to give a shit that I’m in so much pain or exhausted. Dh especially is being totally inconsiderate and I’m ready to snap. I went away sat for the night with a couple girlfriends for my bday and instead of him doing anything around the house he shipped off dd to his parents for the night to go out with friends. I got home and no dishes were done, stuff was all over and he was miserable I’m cuz he was hungover. I’m just so disappointed that he made the choices he did.

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

Thanks ladies.

Ricschick I haven't even got the hospital bag yet, never mind thought what to put in it I have to pack for DS too. Not even thought about it. Whoops!

I'm not sure if I'm waddling yet. I feel like I'm still walking normally. The school run was a shock to the system this morning though. Felt like bubs was going to fall out by the time I got home haha. I did get a few comments on how big I've gotten this morning.

RnW I'm not really close to my fam for them to notice my day to day life. I wish DH was a bit more sympathetic though. There's zero intimacy ATM. It's like if sex is off the table then he's not bothered about anything else. I'd like a flipping back rub maybe. I'm in pain and I'm tired and i just want a bloody rest. He's always been helpful around the house so that's not an issue, I just wish he'd pay more attention to me yknow.

I'm sorry your hubby made some questionable choices this weekend. I would not be pleased to come home to that either.

Enjoy your scan Ricschick. I hope you get some good shots of your little one.

 

[cheluzal]

Thanks all! I did crash yesterday but I have a sore throat today. I cannot breathe and had to through my mouth most of the night so maybe that's it. I used to get them a lot as a kid so hopefully it's just that and goes away and nothing more. 4 days of work then spring break next week.

Off today because of a small town festival here. So I'm about to go through all the gifts we got, which was a ton! I am blessed.

BROKEN: My brother died unexpectedly after a horrific car accident and us taking care of him at home for years. I call that day his "rebirthday" and will always take off work and school and celebrate his life. I do something I normally wouldn't do: I've swam with dolphins, manatees, ziplinging, etc...sometimes I take my two nieces. Make it a tribute day...sometimes it helps...

 

[Reiko_ctu]

Ready - must be a third pregnancy thing. Like they are all the same so we're used to it... well this pregnancy is a lot harder in different ways and I would appreciate some sympathy!

DH did let me nap on the couch for an hour yesterday afternoon without bugging me about it which is great. But when I started crying the other night because I'm feeling so awful and uncomfortable and I have 9 more weeks his only response was "yeah, your belly is really big." I would have appreciated a hug or cuddles or something lol! He wants to have a 4th too but honestly this is getting too hard for me in the last half!

No hospital bag here yet. I always have candy in mine because of my GD, as soon as that baby is out I eat candy haha. Have to pack backpacks for the girls too, we'll be getting them some special new activities to keep them busy if we have to take them. I can't even remember what to put in my hospital bag. Comfy clothes (do I even have anything that will fit after birth!?!?), granny panties, make up, snacks... what else? I'm not the person who packs "my own pillow with a cute pillow case so it looks nicer in photos" lol. Just the basics. And time to install the carseat in the next few weeks too.

 

[ReadynWaiting]

I told dh last week that I was struggling this go around and feeling like I wasn’t able to cope with all that I would normally do. He couldn’t understand what I was talking about. The pain alone is doing me in (and I have a high tolerance) but the constant reflux and unbearable exhaustion is just too much. He texted my sister and said he thinks me being off work is the issue instead of asking her for suggestions on what he could do to help. It’s just frustrating!
I don’t pack a hospital bag but Pinterest has some great ideas if you need any. I have a cart full on Amazon of postpartum items that I will soon order (large/dark panties, pads, nursing pads, nursing bras, diapers and wipes...to name a few lol). Here’s a great post https://www.gentlenursery.com/organic-pregnancy/all-natural-postpartum-care-kit/ about things to have if anyone is looking. I just forgot about some things and was thinking just baby not about what I would need. Another thing I’m going to try is an Amazon subscription to diaper delivery because it gives you 25% off of the cost of diapers/wipes. That way I don’t have to constantly check for sales and stock up when they happen.

 

[KittenLifter]

Chibi, I'm going to try to adopt "it's not going to get smaller!" That's brilliant. I'm not used to people making comments on my body (unless it's "you look so STRONG!" at the gym, which I like) and I am not a fan. Of course I'm getting bigger. This baby has a lot more chunkin' up to do.

Broken, I had a good chuckle about the lost cause of the lady garden. And I'm glad to hear you gave yourself time to just experience your feelings and not try to control them. I had a therapist who used to talk about feelings being like waves; if you let them move you, and move through you, it works a lot better than trying to resist them (they'll just knock you over!). My mom always gives herself at least 24 hours with Very Strong Feelings to just feel them; there's time for action later. And I love the idea that your mom's maybe trying to send you some kindness.

ricschick, I keep looking at "hospital bag" lists and going "don't need one, not going to the hospital unless there's a problem," but you've reminded me I actually DO like the thought of having a little one packed, just in case. It's highly unlikely we'd ever have an emergency transfer (our midwives are very conservative/careful), so theoretically there would be time to put it together last-minute, but I've never been in labor and I can't really see how I'd know how I'll feel at the moment. Maybe it would all be too much to do then! Plus packing a bag is something I can control...and I like that feeling sometimes!

Ready, what a frustrating situation with your DH. It's hard to enjoy a night away as much as you could when there's some unknown chaos going on at home.

chel, glad to hear your latest GTT went okay, too! Your shower sounds lovely and you two are cute as buttons, to boot. I love the idea of a rebirthday, too. What a thoughtful way to honor your brother. (My mom and her sisters do a version of this around the time their mother died; it ends up being a yearly celebration of her life.)

Reiko, hooray for the nap...and it sounds like your DH needs to add something to his list of responses that's nicer than "yeah, your belly is really big" (?!). Maybe "thanks for all this hard work you're doing for our family"........

 

[KittenLifter]

Ready, thanks so much for the link about postpartum care supplies! So clear. So specific. Yesssss.

I hope your DH finds a clue soon. It's hard enough being miserable without having your partner invent reasons you're "actually" feeling bad.

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

Thanks ladies I'm feeling better the closer it gets to the end of the day. The worst in the morning, before her time of death. After that I feel like I can at least breath a bit.

Chel that is such a beautiful thing to do for your brother. What a wonderful way to keep his memory alive.

RnW I'm sorry, your DH needs a bit of a slap and a kick up the butt. I'm sorry he's being insensitive. I hope your sister gave him a flipping clue.

Reiko as well, your DH maybe needs to think about his words. Honestly what is with these men. My DH isn't outright insensitive. He just doesn't comprehend the level of pain I am in all day every day. So he's very "oh that sucks" and very blasé about it.
He's never experienced chronic pain so I really don't think he has any frame of reference.
His go to is always "go soak in the bath" no matter how many time I explain it hurts to step into things and it hurts to open my legs too wide and I'm scared I'm going to get stuck in the effing bath if I bathe when he's not here. I might murder him during labour lol.

Kitten I had a therapist say to me, after I described the 6 months before my mum died (miscarriage, loss of childhood pet, cancer diagnosis for my mum, cared for her for the final 3 months of her life solo, arranged her funeral solo, basically cleaned her house out on my own etc etc) that it was like life had kicked me down the stairs & I was laid at the bottom in shock and the only thing I could do and should do was just lie there for a bit and take in everything that has happened in the short amount of time. It really stuck with me and I try and take the time to actually feel my feelings now, not to repress them and try to control them.

I'm just starting to think about post partum stuff too. I got some soft cotton bras to sleep in. I'm gunna get some disposable pants with pads in for the first couple of days. Big granny pants and big pads for after that. I might get some witch hazel for baths as well. It's been such a long time I can't remember what I packed for the hospital and what I needed for post partum. Heck!

 

[ricschick]

I’m sorry some husbands are being clueless and inconsiderate!! Let’s hope they buck their ideas up ! They really have no clue do they lol.

Had my scan all looks great, didn’t get a great shot of her at all really no side on view of her face as she consentrated on her measurements. She weighing approx 3lb 6! And is on the 81st percentile so definitely on the larger side!!

 

[Reiko_ctu]

Ricschick, I had a late scan with my first and it was so dissapointing there were no good shots! The tech said they're way too big at that point to get any cute profiles or anything. Maybe a frontal shot but that's not cute haha, ours looked like a ghost head on XD

Even if you're doing a home birth my midwives told us to pack a hospital bag, because one thing people don't consider is sometimes AFTER the delivery the baby has to be transferred to the hospital, so packing something is a good idea (& having your carseat ready to go)! And the number one reason women transfer to the hospital is not being able to cope with the pain and needing more options. So if you've never been in labour before I'd definitely pack one I'm not sure if I have to go on insulin or not yet so I'm not sure if we're having a home birth or not!!

 

[KittenLifter]

Broken, oh my goodness, what an INTENSE chapter you had around your mum's death!! Any subset of that would have been a lot, but all together...I can't even imagine. I'm so glad you were strong enough to get support in processing that.

Reiko, that's a good point! Our midwives say most of their transfers are first-time mothers who are just plain exhausted. Our friend (& doula) had one of those transfers with her first (her kid was not coming out right, she had an epidural and a nap and all went smoothly after that). Second kid was born at home, no problems...and then it became clear something wasn't right, so he ended up in the NICU. ALSO a situation where I would not want to be running around the house gathering things.

 

[Reiko_ctu]

GUYS WHYYYY AM I EVEN HAVING ANOTHER KID

I can't even handle the ones I already have!!! No one listens to me around here!!

 

[ReadynWaiting]

GUYS WHYYYY AM I EVEN HAVING ANOTHER KID

I can't even handle the ones I already have!!! No one listens to me around here!!

This was me last week! I was ready to go stay in a hotel and let them all fend for themselves. Instead I decided I would take this by the balls and had a ‘meeting’ with my family like I would have had at work. I had a list of ALL the jobs that need to be done in the house, gave my spiel about no one working together and it all falling on my shoulders. Everyone picked their jobs and committed to working together. Even my 5yr old was rhyming off what she should be doing and said sorry for not. I’m feeling much better today and don’t want to scratch their eyes out lol.
I hope ‘your people’ get their shit together Reiko!

 

[ricschick]

Oh reiko I hear you!!! What drives me mad at the moment is I put things on the stairs (99% of it isn’t mine!) and everyone just walks past it and never takes it up!! It’s driving me mad!!! So I end up taking it up as and when I go as the stairs are a challenge for me at the moment but no one else thinks too!!! Why??? Can they not see it???? Heads are gonna roll ifbit carries on!!!! 🙄

 

[ChibiLena]

31 weeks already! Walking is becoming somewhat of a chore now, haha. Let's see how I do until close to 39 weeks at work. Booked myself in for a prenatal yoga workshop this Saturday...feeling bad that I don't exercise as much this pregnancy. My hands feel hot and swollen at times, I feel hot in general much more often now.