Not Waiting After Miscarriage - Any One Else?

[sarah2211]

I see it on the reverse image and I'm just on my phone. FX for you

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Thanks Sarah.. I honestly would be ok with things either way I just want out of limbo. I'm 7 days late for AF and no sign of it...

 

[Gypsy1106]

Oh my goodness I can't wait till you test today! we're all a little crazy but I totally think I see it too!

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Another view of it

 

[sarah2211]

Thanks ladies. I feel terrible thinking the things I do. But when I see anything to do with people trying beyond their first baby, I just have to take a deep breath. I've been hiding out in the TTC#1 board a lot because it's so much easier. I just want 1, it's just hard to see others talk about their 3rd, 4th, 5th. I hope you understand and don't think I'm being horrible.


Garg, maybe it's time to see a doctor for a blood test. To be honest, I would have expected a darker line if you were that late, but you do heard stories of women who don't get their BFP until they are weeks and weeks late.

 

[StillPraying]

Gagrlin could be that you are earlier tho since mc can mess up your cycles.

Sarah I don't think that's awful at all. I find it harder to be on the boards with those who haven't had a loss, it's an emotional thing. You can't help how you feel. You gotta go wherever helps you.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

I'm thinking AF is on her way.. Which im honestly not upset about.. It'll get me out of limbo.

 

[sarah2211]

Thanks. It is just the most frustrating things I've ever had to deal with. You spend all your life thinking that pregnancy will just happen at the drop of a hat and you need to do everything you can to prevent pregnancy. But then when the time comes and tou want to get pregnant (after being in a committed relationship for many years, but wanting to wait until the time is right) it doesn't happen. And no amount of money or anything can guarantee that this will end positively for you. And there's no timeline. If I knew in the next 2 years we'd have our baby in our arms, I could let go. But there's no way of knowing. We could spend years, thousands of dollars and still be childless at the end, while watching everyone else get their babies and not even be grateful for it. Honestly, that is the one thing I couldn't deal with in my life.

DH's brother and SIL have dealt with infertility and were meant to be coming today to visit and we were going to go to an army family day together. They just text back saying they can't make it but hope we have fun at the family day without any family... Wow.

 

[WishnandHopn]

Oh Sarah you sure said it...I feel exactly the same way. I wish I could look into the future and know that we will have at least one child. I don't even need the crystal ball to tell me when it's going to happen...just IF we will ever have our baby. It would make it so much easier to keep going and keep hoping.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

AF made her appearance and my dh admitted he was a little disappointed.. In think my heart sank a little... Back to charting and temping.. I'm going to do everything in my power to make this month our month...

 

[MissYogi]

Hi ladies, can I join you?

I've just had an early loss at just 5+3 but nonetheless it has been very heartbreaking. I actually haven't even been fully confirmed yet, I still need to get my second blood test to check that my hcg level are dropping and then I'll know for sure on Monday. Although I already know it's gone. I feel sort of terrible for thinking of trying again so quickly but it's what I need to do in order to move on. We will start going for every other day once I stop bleeding and just keep our fingers crossed we get our rainbow baby soon!

 

[sarah2211]

Wishnhopn, that's exactly it. If we could look into that crystal ball and just know it'll happen for us I could take a deep breath and let go and let it happen. DH and I had a big talk this afternoon and he got really annoyed with me saying that we couldn't guarantee we will end up with a baby. He got really annoyed with me for saying that, but it's true. Not everyone who wants a baby gets one. Nothing is 100%.

Gagrlinpitt, I'm sorry I was so hopeful for you. Don't be too hard on yourself, there's so little we can actually do to make it happen. I'm sure you did all you could.

Welcome Missyogi. I'm so sorry for your loss. I remember it took me about 5-6 days to have it confirmed but like you, I knew it was over. We wanted to start again asap and after 2 weeks we did. FX you'll be one of the lucky ones who gets their BFP straight away.

Afm, I think I'm just feeling emotional thanks to the provera. I hope AF shows her face soon. Tonight's my last tablet.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Sarah I think both dh and I were hoping our rainbow baby would come right after the loss.. I think that both hit us pretty hard.

 

[sarah2211]

Gagrlinpitt, I was the same last cycle. After reading about this increased fertility, we got our hopes up. When it was a BFN, it made it even tougher. That's the dumb thing, you want to be hopeful and positive but when the odds are never in your favour and based on all the other months, it's hard. If you want to PM, feel free to send me a message

 

[StillPraying]

Ladies don't be so down on yourselves! Positive thinking goes a long way and they've even done studies proving that it helps! I know it's hard to keep your heads up, but in the end when you DO get your rainbow babies, and I have full faith we all will, we will look back and say it was worth it. You're right sarah, it isn't 100% guaranteed, but then, nothing in life is. Don't live your life focusing on what may or may never happen. Life is much too short to be so hard on yourself. I truly believe we will all overcome this, and I'm so thankful to have such awesome women to get through this with!

Missyogi welcome so sorry for your loss. Mc is hard no matter what stage.

 

[MissYogi]

Still praying, I love your perspective and I think you are absolutely right, it will definitely happen for all of us.

I just had a friend call who knew we were going to be trying but she doesnt knew about the MC and she was asking how I was doing which was really hard to hold it together through but then she says "so no baby yet" and then I just lost it and started crying. I know she doesn't realize the issues with asking that because she's never been even close to this situation but I thought it was just really insensitive. I mean, even if I had good news then I wouldn't want to be forced into announcing it like that. There's really just no good that can come of asking a friend that before they bring it up themselves.

 

[StillPraying]

Missyogi I've had so many people say such insensitive things like that it's obnoxious. People who have not been through losses or ever had to actually ttc have no clue how hard it is.

 

[WishnandHopn]

MissYogi, I'm sorry you're going through this. It's definitely tough, so many things would set me off crying in the first couple of weeks after my loss. People can really be insensitive with their questions and comments, even if they mean well.

Just this week someone at work I hadn't seen in over a year patted her own tummy and whispered 'are you pregnant?'. I almost lost it. I told her no, I'm just fat. Ugh, hate those questions!

 

[StillPraying]

Wish I'm so sorry. I hate comments like that. Our birthday ball is coming soon and one of my Marines told me, "we'll at least now you can drink at the ball".....no that does not make me feel better about losing a baby.

 

[MissYogi]

I honestly think they all mean well and are just trying to be nice but don't know what else to say. My friend who asked on the phone is such a kind person and she knows how badly I want a baby and she is a good friend who I would likely tell pretty early anyways. But she has never wanted kids and just doesn't know the aching feeling when you can't have a baby that you want so badly so she doesn't understand how painful it can be to talk about. I'm sure she feels really badly for having asked now that she knows because I just broke down and told her what was going on. Then she was so kind and offered to bring me food and I just wanted to scream "I don't want to eat I just want my baby!"