October babies due dates and bump colours

[OctBebe]

Ugh what a hectic last few days. Im moving this weeked so i am already stressing about that. Doesn't help my alcoholic mother is text absuing me with horrible texts then thinks its all ok in the morning! Saying i think my baby is a joke. NO YOUR ADDICTION IS A JOKE MUM! Grrrrr

Having trouble sleeping so uncomfortable at the moment. Its winter here and I cant stop sweating and overheating. I work in an office where everyone wants the heaters on and im dying LOL

 

[LittleStars]

I'm saving buying the big items like the exersaucer for Xmas gifts. I already have one but definitely want two so I figured why not just get it at Xmas. So weird that Christmas is so close to when the babies will be born since last time around my DD was born it wasn't for another 6 months.

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Ugh what a hectic last few days. Im moving this weeked so i am already stressing about that. Doesn't help my alcoholic mother is text absuing me with horrible texts then thinks its all ok in the morning! Saying i think my baby is a joke. NO YOUR ADDICTION IS A JOKE MUM! Grrrrr

Having trouble sleeping so uncomfortable at the moment. Its winter here and I cant stop sweating and overheating. I work in an office where everyone wants the heaters on and im dying LOL

So sorry to hear that. Maybe it's time to get a new number and not give it out to her. You have a baby on the way and a family of your own now that your responsible for. She need to take responsibility for her behavior and actions.

I'm dealing with something similar only not as drastic with my own parents. I've seemed to be the parent and THEY are the children. While they're not addicted to alcohol they are loose with money and irresponsible in other ways. I dealt with physical abuse as a child with my dad, though he KNOWS he can't do this now so our relationship is somewhat better but neither parent knows how to deal with emotion and pretty much shuts down.

They had me doing everything for them as a teen and now that I'm married, they like my husband to install this, do this, do that. Keeping in mind we're an hour away so getting back and forth is hard. They're selfish yet the way they show affection is with material possession and money so if we ever need any of that...we have it....though they spend money they don't have like it's water and I find myself constantly telling them they need to put the money in a savings instead of buying the latest fridge, gaming systems, computers, etc. There's more but the moral to this is I've had to let their behavior and bad habits go. I know this is going to come back to haunt me when one of them passes, but the truth is..I have a child on the way and my family comes first. I've tried to help and it's just not working. It's THEY'RE responsibility to deal with their behaviors.

So maybe instead of putting you and the baby at risk, it's time to cut the cord with mom, change your number and for HER to take responsibility for her addiction. You'll feel guilt there's no doubt. It's what happens when we kids play the role of the parent instead of vise versa....BUT the only way they can move forward is to take responsibility for their own lives and clean up their own addiction. Do NOT take responsibility for their actions. Turn their behavior back to them and let THEM take responsibility for their own actions and lives.

Sorry, don't mean to sound like a therapist. I've just been there in a different way and it REALLY takes a toll on you being the parent and taking abuse. If anything, what will this teach your own child if you allow your mothers behavior ESPECIALLY abusive behavior towards HER daughter?! I try to keep boundaries and when my mother goes over them, she has to deal with the consequences. Just like a child would for their behavior. It's just sad that when we need our parents they're too busy acting childish. A daughter needs her mother in pregnancy. Just frustrating....for me at least.

I pray her words go through one ear and out the other...There's a scripture I like that helps put things into perspective for me through my own frustration:

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things. Philippians 4:8

Now I'm not sure if your a believer in Jesus....but I think this is true no matter what you believe. Think on the positive. Actually re-reading this today has helped remind me through the moodiness to focus more on the positive. In your case, I would say that what your mom speaks, ESPECIALLY of your child...it's not truth. I'm sure if we let our parents, their hurtful words "could be truth" when they're NOT but I think you know that what your mom spews is not only from her addiction, but maybe even hatred for herself. That's a behavior SHE needs to deal with not you. This is NOT your responsibility dear friend.

 

[OctBebe]

Thank you mommy's angel I really appreciate it. I am lost with what to do and your post helps. The stress is just CRAZY I found myself having to breath my anger out on the couch last night over the text and turn my phone off, I have not been that angry in a LONG time.
I get a text in the morning saying she is ashamed as she reads through her sent messages. I have no replied. She can choose, booze or her grandson.
and i WILL get a tresspassing order on her if I have to.

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Thank you mommy's angel I really appreciate it. I am lost with what to do and your post helps. The stress is just CRAZY I found myself having to breath my anger out on the couch last night over the text and turn my phone off, I have not been that angry in a LONG time.
I get a text in the morning saying she is ashamed as she reads through her sent messages. I have no replied. She can choose, booze or her grandson.
and i WILL get a tresspassing order on her if I have to.

Sometimes it takes a child who's parented a parent to understand one. In all honesty, you have a family right now and this stress is NOT something you need. It's apparent you love her and I'm sure of that...but it's time to let go of the guilt and let HER help herself. If she wants to be a part of your life, it's without these shenanigans! Otherwise it's time to let her go. This can't be an example you want for your child. I think the hardest part is wondering whether she'll choose the bottle again over you. It's possible until she gets to that breaking point BUT as much as YOU need your mother? Your son will need HIS. He's your priority and your physical and emotional well being is SO important for your child and your spouse. Especially for you dear!

Okay enough of me giving advice when it's not asked.

You have a little one to look forward to and this is EXCITING!

 

[zb5]

nypage and MA, I can relate! I slept HORRIBLY last night because I was up listening to the hurricane. The lack of sleep really affects my mood too. I ended up crying in a Taco Bell today! DH wasn't even surprised, just "Okay, do you want me to get you some napkins and hot sauce?" I can't imagine what I will be like as a new mom! Hope we all get some better sleep. It does wonders for our moods.

Octbebe, sorry to hear your mom says such terrible things. My MIL is also an alcoholic, not so much abusive but generally difficult. The result is we just don't see her that often - they live a several hours flight away and they never visit us, and we don't make visiting them a huge priority. It's sad, but like MA says, we have to prioritize our own family. Anyway, big hugs! It's such a hard thing to deal with and there is no right answer.

 

[Lys]

Hi Ladies!
I am w/ you guys on not sleeping well!!! I am averaging about 4 hrs a night and it has seriously begun to take a toll!! I wake up around 12am - 1am every night and DO NOT FALL back asleep. The good news is that I am only working up to 37 weeks which means I only have two weeks left of work as of tomorrow!!! It might be a very long 2 weeks but the maternity leave is in sight!!!

Sorry to hear about the family issues... I know that family troubles are so hard because we (people) have such an instinctive need to love and be loved by our families!! I guess an encouraging thought is that w/ these little ones we have the ability to do right by our babies and do things differently than our parents or parents in law!!

MA: I am definitely getting a prenatal massage as soon as I am on maternity leave!!!

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Hi ladies!

On the sleep issue. Not sure if I mentioned this but I'm taking Ambien. The low dose at 5 mg. I actually found out a mommy of triplets was given it in her hospital and they said it was safe. Usually it's not given until 33 or 34wks. It's a b rated drug. At any rate, it's not for long term but my Dr. gave it to me to try for 3 days to try and start up the sleep pattern again and then take several days off and try 3 more again. SO this is where I am. I took 3 and I felt AWESOME. Then I couldn't sleep again and started getting CRAZY so I'm taking one tonight. It's the lower dose so it's not as potent. It's an option if things get REALLY bad for you. The tylenol pm makes me shake and the benedryl stopped working so I was in DIRE need of sleep.

The prenatal massages. I'm calling the insurance company tomorrow to find out if theyre covered. Even if I need a script to cover them it would be worth it. Doug gets tired after a few minutes and I NEED invasive. After the wedding my ankles, feet and legs swelled and even after being in bed yesterday and today with my feet up and drinking water, I'm still slightly swollen. Not sure if I mentioned it but the nurse said last friday the reason for the pain in my pelvis is because it's filled with water. MUST be the plus size issue. I'm almost wondering if this is a reason Amelia isn't comfortable moving into head down position. I was thinking a massage might help.

Also, I'm calling Le Leche League tomorrow too. I've been having SEVERE pain in my boobs once in awhile. Yesterday I had it again. My nipples turn purple. I'm not even exagerating! It's really odd. Someone in this bnb forums mentioned Raynauds syndrome which I'm HOPING I don't have. Just what I'd need, another "syndrome". This morning I looked and my boobs are big and the areola is darker. I'm honestly thinking it's milk production. One site said it "could" be pre-engourgement. The only way to know is by seeing if someone at LLL knows and maybe they can help me "carefully" see if milk is actually being produced by hand-expressing. I DO have to be careful not to cause nipple stimulation to put me in preterm labor but I have to figure out what's going on. Also it would help to know ahead of time if I'm producing anything. Kinda prepare my mind!

Well, I'm about to take my Ambien for the evening. If I respond to anymore posts and I'm not making a bit of sense...you'll know I feel PRETTY DARN GOOD!

 

[tanni78]

hi, can i join you please? i have 3 girls aged 12, 9 and 7 and am expecting a blue bump on oct 29th!!!!! xx

 

[LittleStars]

Welcome Tanni!

Sorry for my last post. My daughter bonked my arm and it entered my post andI wasn't finished but then DH was telling me he needed to go on the computer so I never got to respond to OctBabe. Doh!

Seems like a lot was already said but wanted to add in. MIL was a destructive force against DH and our marriage and our parenting when our first LO came. We ended up having to walk away from her for nearly 3 years and even now things are questionable. We're tolerating things because the twins are on the way but are VERY aware of her behavior and will not hesitate to walk away once again for our sanity. So hang in there OctBabe! Just do what feels right to make sure that your family has a happy life.

MA - I hope you get your boobie issue sorted. KUP on what's going on, doesn't sound good when you start mentioning syndromes!

As for the sleeping.. last night for some odd reason I slept for 5 hours straight. It was bliss (and possibly a fluke)! It was like in the summer when I was anemic and I slept like a log. I realized this morning I haven't been having OJ with my iron pill in the morning like I was told to, just water. I'm wondering if it means that my body isn't getting the iron it need hence the sleep. Also just wondered if it were for the fact that I was so pooped from the weeding I did yesterday in the backyard, or should I say former jungle? It's was a little wild in there! lol

My sister came to visit last night for a bit and it was nice to see her. Then DH and I watched Insidious but had wanted to get Paranormal 2, they were all out. doh.

Today I'm off shopping with my sister and mostly likely DD to baby shops for some fun. Then home to get the nursery cleaned up and a little more finished. My sister is dying to see the room and I wouldn't even let her peek!

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Welcome Tanni!

So, A friend of mine who offered to help my husband and mom two months ago with the shower has come up with a cold and then told me she had to be honest and forgot. My mom doesn't know her and she had wondered if this girl was trustworthy because she REALLY needed the help. "Usually" she is, but boy did this surprise me. While she did have surgery a few weeks ago, she mentioned the shower and how she couldn't wait....then she had several other showers, weddings and birthdays to go to and has seemed to forgotten about mine.

It wouldn't be so bad if mom hadn't asked if she could help with planning the games for the shower...then she also offered to make a few things and be there to help.

NOW she's saying her husband will be out of town and she has her two young boys with her and is acting like single mom until dad comes home.

I'm FRANTIC! She told me that she would call my mom yesterday and didn't and told me to tell her she would call tonight because after the party she caught a "cold". She wanted me to pass it on. I'm NOT passing this message on as I dont want to hear "I told you so from my mother".

I also can't imagine these two young toddlers at the shower. Not that I don't like kids, but these little silly guys are in to EVERYTHING. I had my cake designed specially and it wasn't cheap...then there are hot roasters that will be keeping ziti in. Just NOT a place for toddlers to run around loose.

I'm bout in tears but had to tell myself to calm down and trust that God has a plan. NOT to take this "drama" on for myself. Doug did a double and is sleeping so I can't confide in him. He's been a bit more level-headed than I have lately and I'm sure he'd be the calm source of reality.

Again, here's where my comfort zone is WAY over the top. My mom will freak and I didn't want this shower. I wanted a nice calming sip n see with Amelia here. She means well, but it ends up like everything else...very chaotic and the brunt of everything goes on my husband, myself or both of us. I like PEACE! I needed it for this pregnancy with all the hormone treatments we did to get here, the hormones I'm taking to keep Amelia, the hospital stays for infection, the loss of our little guy. I just needed some peace and just to find joy in the process and instead, little things like this are driving me batty.

Now my fear is dealing with my mothers attitude and second guessing my friendship with this girl who volunteered on her own and just forgot. I mean everyone accidentally forgets. ((sigh)) Ah well, I'm just going to give it to God and let Him deal with the chaos. I can't handle anything outside my own issues. I'm grateful to the people planning and putting this on and those who are actually coming....I'm just out of my comfort zone.

 

[FeistyMom]

MA - you are an inspiration to me. I too rely on my DH to be the calming influence on me, because I get so worked up over things like that, and honestly they are out of our control and better if we can let them go.

You are right - people do accidentally forget things, and I think you are amazing for thinking positively about it. I hope your shower turns out beautifully and is as stress-free as possible. Hang in there, and I hope you are getting more sleep!

 

[AmberS]

Due October 25th with a baby boy

 

[MrsK]

:wave: Welcome AmberS and Tanni!

Sorry this shower isn't turning out as planned, MA! Unfortunately, life always likes to throw us a curve ball, hm? The best-laid plans get ruined by some small thing, and then it's all drama and stress. But you're right, just take it easy-- let things happen the way they do, and don't stress about it. Laugh at the mishaps, that way they're no big deal at all

My boobies have been in lots of pain since about 20 weeks or so.. my left one especially is just SO sensitive. I've been leaking since then, too.. and in the last few days, they leaking has increased by a lot, to the point where I really should be wearing pads... but.. I don't like them. lol. They're itchy.

I don't think you need to be too worried about causing labor by stimulating your nipples, MA.. from what I've read, to start labor, you have to stimulate your nipples for several HOURS a day to cause real contractions, and the stimulation has to mimic a baby's suckling.
Oh, and if you want to see if you can get colostrum to come out, I don't think you even need to touch your nipples much. Mine leak if I squeeze the whole thing slowly from the outside toward the nipple, but doesn't have to include the nipple. Lol TMI maybe, sorry.. just wanted to share what I've learned so far ;-)

I'm a little glad to hear that I'm not the only one feeling super uncomfortable lately. At least I know I'm not alone in all my pain and sleeplessness! I'm sooo ready to just have this all over with and get the baby out! He's getting way too huge and heavy. I'm 5'-10" with a long torso.. but by now this "little" one is getting so big that he's making it impossible to eat more than a few bites, even when I think I'm starving.. and sometimes it's almost like he gives me a kick in the stomach or something and I suddenly feel terribly nauseous. Plus those lovely feet in my ribs and being short of breath... argh.. I know all pregnant moms go through this, but I'm getting really tired of it! SO hoping I don't make it to 40 weeks.. haha.

When I think about the fact that I'm only 3 weeks away from full term, though, it does seem to make it all a little easier, though... just 3 weeks to full term, 6 weeks till due date.. that's really soon! Like.. really, really soon! lol!

I went on a looong shopping trip yesterday to BRU and Buy Buy Baby.. and got pretty much everything left on my list. THEN I installed the car seat and child-view mirror.. .. I guess it's probably a little early for that, especially since I have to move the passenger seat all the way to the front to fit the car seat... but.. I just really, really wanted to have everything all ready to go.
Now I just have to buy the changing pad I like on Amazon.. annnd.. then I'm all set! Woohoo, feels good :-D I hadn't really started buying anything until August.. and didn't even have ANY clothes for LO until this past weekend.. so I'm really surprised to be done with preparations and shopping 6 weeks before the due date ;-)

 

[LittleStars]

MrsK - wow! I'm impressed that you are done. I feel so ill prepared still.

I went shopping with my sister yesterday (and got in trouble form DH because he was mad I was out for so long but that's a whole other story). Meanwhile DD hung out with the grandparents all day. Anyway, I found two strollers that I'm down to.. leaning towards one of them, a side-by-side 25" wide twin stroller. I need to double check that it'll fit in my trunk theoretically for when we got places we want a heavy duty strolelr. It's so new on the market there isn't a lot of reviews on it but things from the same company and the side-by-side that is 29" get good reviews so I am hopeful it would be a good purchase. The other contender would be a tandem one that allows you to flip the seats forward, backward, facing together and facing away and it's tiered so theone in the back doesn't get their view obstructed. Still I fear the fighting over who is in front so I dunno.. Both are within $30 of each other but one is on special price for a limited time. Grrr... Need to think. I am hoping I can talk to a mommy I know from DD's school next week who has two young ones and ask what they would go for. I really don't need a stroller until the snow comes anyway since I have the car seat snap'n'go and my old stroller has a bassinette I can put both babies into for the initial few months but if I want the one on sale then I probably have to buy it shortly. Don't mind me.. just thinking out loud.

So my DD is pissed at me this morning. She literally will not come out of her room, far less talk to me. All because yesterday she convinced my mom to buy her her Halloween costume at Costco early and she doesn't get she can't wear it and play in it for the next two months because it'll get ruined.

I love when my day starts like this.

Last night sleep wasn't nearly as good as the previous night though not completely as bad as before. However, DH is tired of listening my me grunt and groan and saying 'ow' all night long as I turn over so he's decided since it wakes him up anyway when I do it he'll mock me and remind me how annoying I'm being. Gee thanks honey! He seems to think I'm just putting it on for show or something. Does he not get my pelvis feels like it's going to crack in two constantly, I can barely lift my legs, have a hard time using stomach muscles and am generally a tired and sore beached whale? It's like they know we're pregnant but yet give us no allowance for the fact that we're pregnant. I am so going to milk how sore I am from the c-section. It'll serve him right.

So anyway, yeah.. haha feel better having said all that today. Plan on taking it relatively easy but getting some stuff in the house done, assuming my family doesn't drive me bonkers.

 

[nypage1981]

I can't use my stomach muscles either and have to call OH in to help lift me up every time I need to get up from laying! He loves it though, I know he likes to care for me and feel really needed. At least thats what I tell myself I even call him into the room if I need like the end of my phone charger to plug my phone in and its on the floor. Hahaha. I love it.

Little- I hear ya on the stroller issues. I go at least once a week looking, comparing, opening, pushing, pulling, shaking, turning these damn strollers, think I figure out which to get, dont get it, and later start researching online and confused all over again. Then go to another place and start over again. I canNOT decide which brand to go with. Graco, Chicco, or Eddie Bauer. I am never going to have a car seat I would just let DD wear her old comtumes, maybe that would take her mind off the new one for a moment.?

MA- hope the shower works out for you. I just found out yesterday my work wants to have one there for me, but we work in patient care so doing one there seems akward as its a hospital so at any time people have to be working and cant just solely stop for a while to do this with me...so what, I just open gifts whether they're there or not? Idk, seems weird, nice thought though...I would just tell mom the part about the friend's husband leaving and kind of play it like that...instead of the she forgot part. Maybe then its more like something she cant control rather than just kind of flaking out.

Mrs- I am jealous of tall girls. I am 5'1 and this pregnancy has turned into torture! Pure torture. Like you, the ribs are always in pain, I can't sit up anymore or bend forward in the least, i have no torso so I feel pain in the cervix and ribs at the same time. I pant like a dog if I move from bathroom to bedroom! Its hard to imagine 6 more weeks of growth...especially since most babies will double this weight by the time we are done. DOUBLE?!? I can't even imagine.

 

[MrsK]

However, DH is tired of listening my me grunt and groan and saying 'ow' all night long as I turn over so he's decided since it wakes him up anyway when I do it he'll mock me and remind me how annoying I'm being. Gee thanks honey! He seems to think I'm just putting it on for show or something.

Aww.. I'm miserable with one LO in there, I can only imagine how much harder twins must be! To be honest-- before I ever got pregnant, I thought those preggo girls MUST be putting on a show.. I couldn't imagine that it's really as bad as they say. Now I realize that most actually downplay how miserable it can be!
So.. I guess most men will never really be able to put themselves in our shoes. Now that my stomach is getting huge, my hubby seems to realize more and more that it's difficult for me, and tries to help out... but I think sometimes he still thinks I'm exaggerating.. lol. He especially doesn't get the hormones and bursting out in tears over some insignificant little thing.

If I had to buy baby gear for twins, I think I'd be completely stuck... that's so much more researching and thinking! I think the second stroller you mentioned sounds lovely.. but you're right, they would probably fight about who gets to sit where. Maybe decorate each seat with a special name in a special color, and keep them in the same seats from the very beginning, before they care who sits where? That way later on it would be all about sitting in THEIR seat, not in front. That's how my baby sisters are, anyway.. they're almost like twins.. and to them it's always important to somehow mark that something belongs to them. Recently my mom brought them each a cup from Colorado.. both the same cup to avoid fights.. and guess what they did? They found some tiny little dot INSIDE the cup on one of them, so that way they still know which cup belongs to who, and they MUST have their own cup all the time.

I've heard that moms of multiples often assign a special color to each child, and buy everything in that color.. so the child knows exactly what's his/hers and there aren't so many fights.

maybe that would work?

 

[MrsK]

Oh, and I also wanted to ask... for those of you who have kids already.... Has anybody used those hook-on travel high chairs that clamp onto a table or countertop? Like this:

https://images.babyage.com/icons/localhost/products/large/l-62508.70.jpg

I got a full-size Chicco high chair as a gift.. and am now wondering whether I should return it in favor of a hook-on chair or keep it. The full-size high chair is just so big.. and even though my kitchen is not tiny, it's rectangular without any nooks or corners where I could keep the high chair when not in use. It would really get in the way!

We have a large island where we eat all our meals.. and I think a hook-on chair would be so nice! LO would be at the same level as our barstools, and he'd be right there at the table with us instead of "alone" in his high chair.

I've read tons of reviews, and it seems like some people really hate how food falls into baby's lap, though, since most of these hook-on chairs don't have a tray. However, Chicco does make one with a tray.. and it's even 360-degree rotating, which sounds even better to me... AND Buy Buy Baby, where I'd have to return the high chair I have carries it.. so I'll be able to buy it with store credit.

https://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41HPMpEdsyL._AA300_.jpg
https://www.amazon.com/Chicco-Degree-Rotating-Hook-Chair/dp/B002GD4H6M/ref=pd_sbs_ba_3

Just wondering if any of you ladies have any experience with these? Love them, hate them? Or even if you've never had one... does it sound practical at all??

Many people complained that the chairs were hard to clean... but when I read reviews for the full-size high chair I have, people say the exact same thing about it. I thought I might just try to avoid huge messes by covering the chair in a receiving blanket before putting LO in it at every meal?

 

[nypage1981]

I liked the highchair because it reclined so much so when they couldnt hold themselves perfectly upright it could still be used...but then we did rely on the booster seat more when she could sit well. As the high chair was a pain to mess with opening the tray thing, getting her in it and stuff. Does the swivel chair on the chicco one lock? Because that would be aweful if the baby could turn whenever they wanted to, as feeding time is sometimes a battle.

 

[MrsK]

Yes, it does lock-- because that would definitely be a pain. The hook-on chairs wouldn't work for a baby that can't sit up fully on their own.. but by the time they start solids at 6 months, most can sit upright.... right? Until then, we could use the bouncer and swing to put her down... although I do have a Baby K'Tan carrier which he will probably be in most of those first few months.