Oh just said he might not want second

[Flip flop]

It's like roller coaster!

Beckie1991, I hope u got on ok at the dr today?

 

[Tink1o5]

It definitely seems like a roller coaster. Hopefully you get some sort of answer soon though.

 

[Flip flop]

I think it most likely is af, feels very Crampy, will find out tomorrow.

My only other hope in the meantime is if only use the pull out method I guess it could still Happen, he must know the risks!

 

[Tink1o5]

Yea he should know the risks. Just try an keep your head up

 

[Flip flop]

Thanks Tink. Still no sign of proper af but im pretty sure she's on her way.

The other option I have been thinking about is to say to DH ok it's fine to completely forgot the idea at the moment, but as long as we can defo try in the future when he's feeling better about everything. I would even suggest I could go back on the pill....as much as I don't want to. What do u think of that idea?

 

[Flip flop]

Ok so it's officially af now, that was my longest cycle ever

 

[Tink1o5]

Big big hun. Well I think what you should do is sit down and have a complete talk with your OH. Let him explain himself and you explain yourself. Maybe then you guys can come to a compromise about maybe trying in the future when he feels more comfortable with your guys situation.

 

[Flip flop]

Yeah it's probably a wise move. Although I'm not sure if I can park the idea for now unless I know it will defo happen at some point in the future.

I doubt I'll bring it up tonight as he's had a terrible day at work again, and he's out all day tomorrow.

 

[Tink1o5]

Maybe since he is having so much stress from work, you could set up a little romantic dinner for the two of you at home, and make it a relaxing evening and after dinner have a relaxed conversation of what it is you both want an need from eachother.

 

[Flip flop]

That's a great idea! Although not sure how that would work with lo unless got mum to babysit. I'll think about thats idea. I am really reluctant to go back on the pill though as it's so against everything I want at the moment.

 

[Tink1o5]

Yea well maybe you guys can use condoms or something instead of going back on the pill? Just a thought

 

[Flip flop]

I think for now I'll leave it up to him to organise, which I guess will mean the pull out method!

 

[Tink1o5]

Looks that way. Keep me posted on how it all goes for you flip flop. Hoping the best!

 

[Flip flop]

I will Tink1o5 you've been a great help!

 

[EmyDra]

Reading over your thread and just wanted to send . 2 years of age is a super stressful time for kids and it'll get much easier. Even if you wait till he's in school, managing an older child and baby is much easier than 2 young ones.

I think it's cruel to change your mind. The next baby will be easier as second ones usually are, there's much less worry over eating/sleeping/feeding as you've done it before.

From your sons pov a brother or sister will enhance his childhood so much. I find it easier with a 2 and 4 year old than I ever did with just a 2 year old - I've even flown on my own with the pair of them and it was easier than just having one.

When I met DH I had my son who was 6 months and he had two daughters of 3 and 5. He said he never wanted anymore children and I said that I really did and couldn't envisage my life without more. We started TTC after 6 months and whilst pregnant he said he'd be open to another after this one and we are happily TTC number 3.

 

[Flip flop]

Thanks for the support EmyDra. I'm beginning to come round to the idea that I'll have to wait. I woke up this morning with a terrible sore head and it think it's been from tension worrying about all this (and I've had a busy weekend). I think he will agree eventually he just needs a bit of space to think.

One thing I've noticed lately is that he can't handle the constant whining from ds, he just moans at everything. I also think he needs to spend more time with him to build up more of a bond with him as at the moment that may be lacking.

I really can't see him wanting a third one though!!

 

[ChiiBaby]

Oh hun ive just read through whats happened
I know he wants to get a better job, but cant he look for one while your pregnant he does have 9 months

My OH the other week said he didnt want another one yet after telling me he did. So after alot of tears from me aha, he said okay to trying. We are getting married in 2 years and i want the baby to be hopfully walking by then. He did accurly ask me to wait till after the wedding! but i said no.
We are finally ttc now but im still scared he doesnt want to ( ithink he is just doing it for my sake)

and as tink said a lovey romantic meal would be lovely!

Does you OH know that you can still get pregnant from pulling out? Becasue of the precum

Hope all goes well for you

 

[Flip flop]

Chiibaby, thanks for your comment. You're right he could look for a job while I was pregnant but I think he just can't handle the thought of it at the moment because of the stress from his current job.

I ended up getting upset today, it wasn't just about the baby thing I've just been really sad all week about everything including him being so unhappy in his job and all his drinking. I mentioned the baby thing but he said he didn't think we should talk about it then because he had a hangover and I was so upset. I mentioned about me going back on the pill as long as it can happen in future some time and he said maybe but well talk about it tomorrow. I doubt we will though.

He must know the risks!

 

[Flip flop]

Chibaby, I meant to say that must be hard if u think he doesn't really want it, he mustn't mind that much though or he wouldn't have give in?

 

[Luckybug]

Just to jump in, but I think when you're unhappy in your job it makes everything just that much harder. Plus, in addition to that having another child would keep him from quitting if things got rougher if it got to the point where he had to.

That's really what my husband's only reservation is. It's not that he hates the military, he just wants to be closer to family, and it's almost impossible to get a job back in Kentucky that pays what we're making now. Actually it's pretty impossible. We're going to bite the bullet and save up money the best as we can to kind of cushion ourselves for the fallout of both having a child and moving back home in three years.