OH performance anxiety - 6 BFPs so far!!!!

[Juniperjules]

Hehe... Yeh a few months back I actually said to OH that I felt like I was turning back into a virgin!! : ) gotta have a sense of humour in all of this eh??!!? Otherwise you'd go nutz!
I HAVE found that the more sex we have... The more sex we have... If u get my drift? I actually think we got a bit lazy & complacent. I put on alot of weight & lost my confidence, and I think that affected him too. So we kinda drifted away from having regular sex- & I felt uncomfortable in my own body. Then last year we both started cycling, sometimes 60-80km a week & I lost heaps of weight & got my confidence back.

Unfortunately we've also had alot of external stressors this year due which hasn't helped either! But the sex has definitely been getting better & easier.

Unfortunately I panic easily about all of this though. I did it the other night, started saying crazy things acting really insecure... I know it's all of the pressures on top of one another that eventually get to me.. If we weren't TTC I'd be happy just casually working on improving our sex life. It's the baby-making that is usually the straw that breaks the camels back!

Well done on the weight loss Juniper. I too need to lose some. I might try cycling again.

Just to say, I am on a mission this month. I want my OH's sperm every other day. Im on CD8 today and plan to get some every other day until AF arrives. I feel mean as it feels like I am just getting my OH to comply as a babymaker but I just dont think we usually have spermy sex often enough in the month. I am making use of Artificial Insemination techniques this month which removes the romance even more but at least I am guaranteed a delivery!

The cycling is the one thing that really works for me bcos it burns heaps of calories & I actually enjoy it- which means I don't give up! We did a 35km ride yesterday, start of spring here so weather is perfect for good riding. Mind u I'm paying for it today, did a few killer hills & my legs are feeling it today!

Your AI idea sounds like a good plan. Good luck with it. I wish I could get OH to give me his swimmers that often. Sometimes u have to try something different, makes u feel like ur doing a bit more. So I hope it all goes well for you.

I hear you on the issue of using OH as a baby maker..I feel that way almost every month. But I keep reminding myself that after all the years together that's a ridiculous way to feel. And anyway, it's for both of our own good! OH wants a baby too, but if I left all of this up to him it'd never happen. He's too laid back, he just thinks 'hey, it'll happen, people have babies all the time, don't stress'. He even said to me last nite 'your probably pregnant already' & got annoyed when I said 'yeh I don't think so'. I'm not even sure I Ov this month! He does not get it!!!! ; )

Speaking of which... TMI WARNING!! So I am cd18 now. Not certain when/if I Ov this month. I thought 'maybe' on cd12 I might've. However.. This morning I seemed to have some unusual CM?? I hate to be gross, but it was like a 'blob' of CM.. Eeewww sorry girls, can't believe I'm writing that!!! It was like a mix maybe of EWCM & creamy CM. so now I'm confused to the max. If it IS Ov then it's really late for me & I'm not happy! This month is a bust I think. No flippin idea wot going on. I'm def buying a Clearblue monitor on payday...

 

[Katherine1209]

Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...

Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...

 

[Juniperjules]

Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...

Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...

Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone.

Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff??

3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???

 

[viccat]

Good luck on the baby making front greenjelly! We DTD last night, and I'm not sure either of us was really in the mood, but hey at least we gave it a go. It is not the most romantic, but I think he has learnt at least it stops me from getting upset

Speaking of which... TMI WARNING!! So I am cd18 now. Not certain when/if I Ov this month. I thought 'maybe' on cd12 I might've. However.. This morning I seemed to have some unusual CM?? I hate to be gross, but it was like a 'blob' of CM.. Eeewww sorry girls, can't believe I'm writing that!!! It was like a mix maybe of EWCM & creamy CM. so now I'm confused to the max. If it IS Ov then it's really late for me & I'm not happy! This month is a bust I think. No flippin idea wot going on. I'm def buying a Clearblue monitor on payday...

Nothing is TMI around here! I get blobs of CM - generally around the EWCM time. I have always figured it is slightly dried up EWCM Bodies are funny and fascinating things aren't they?


Sorry to hear AF has turned up Katherine I was really hoping you would get your birthday BFP too.....

 

[Katherine1209]

Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...

Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...

Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone.

Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff??

3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???

I've had two blood tests now, each on cd 21 to measure progesterone and AMH. Got my second lot of results from the receptionist today who said I might be peri menopausal!!? That scared the crap out of me so I've been googling a lot about what it means...but I'm seeing my dr Friday to see what our next step might be....also trying to get my oh to have a semem analysis but he's a bit of a procrastinator when it comes to medical stuff so he's dragging his feet....

Yes, my birthday is Wednesday and my OHs was Monday so we always go out on the Tuesday...off to a Mexican feasts and given my bfn and af showing up....I'll be enjoying a margarita too!

 

[greenjelly]

Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...

Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...

Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone.

Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff??

3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???

I've had two blood tests now, each on cd 21 to measure progesterone and AMH. Got my second lot of results from the receptionist today who said I might be peri menopausal!!? That scared the crap out of me so I've been googling a lot about what it means...but I'm seeing my dr Friday to see what our next step might be....also trying to get my oh to have a semem analysis but he's a bit of a procrastinator when it comes to medical stuff so he's dragging his feet....

Yes, my birthday is Wednesday and my OHs was Monday so we always go out on the Tuesday...off to a Mexican feasts and given my bfn and af showing up....I'll be enjoying a margarita too!

Good attitude Katherine. Life goes on without a BFP huh? Margarita sounds good too! Sorry to hear about AF though. I had been feeling confident last month too. Not fair is it?
I have just been to see my doc. Now we have my OH's sperm test results, I feel more confident in pushing for more tests for me. She is going refer me for a HSG which I feel is the next step. My blood test showed I am ovulating and a scan didnt show anything wrong with my bits and pieces so the next step has to be my tubes .I told my doc about my AI efforts. She didnt seem too shocked and told me to carry on with the project!

 

[Juniperjules]

Good luck on the baby making front greenjelly! We DTD last night, and I'm not sure either of us was really in the mood, but hey at least we gave it a go. It is not the most romantic, but I think he has learnt at least it stops me from getting upset

Speaking of which... TMI WARNING!! So I am cd18 now. Not certain when/if I Ov this month. I thought 'maybe' on cd12 I might've. However.. This morning I seemed to have some unusual CM?? I hate to be gross, but it was like a 'blob' of CM.. Eeewww sorry girls, can't believe I'm writing that!!! It was like a mix maybe of EWCM & creamy CM. so now I'm confused to the max. If it IS Ov then it's really late for me & I'm not happy! This month is a bust I think. No flippin idea wot going on. I'm def buying a Clearblue monitor on payday...

Nothing is TMI around here! I get blobs of CM - generally around the EWCM time. I have always figured it is slightly dried up EWCM Bodies are funny and fascinating things aren't they?


Sorry to hear AF has turned up Katherine I was really hoping you would get your birthday BFP too.....

fingers crossed last nite was the charm for you Viccat! ive kinda decided that when it comes to our TTC attempts im not really bothered anymore if its romantic! gosh isnt that terrible?! but he knows how much i love him....i'll concentrate on making the rest of the month sweet and loving...its all about getting the job done right now : ) but i do feel a little psychotic sometimes. im soooo lucky that hes such a calm and placid person.

i dunno whats going on with my CM, its different this month to how it usually is. so im just gonna have to go with the flow. doubt that we even DTD during
ov so im not putting any real hope into this month

 

[Juniperjules]

Hi Green! My dd is coming over to cook me and OH dinner on Wednesday and i am going to get my nails done.....so that will be great...along with having three days off work...

Today has really sucked...spotting this am and now af has shown up...im so devestated as i had definitely got my hopes up for a birthday BFP! I hate this waiting and disappointment each month...made another dr appointment Friday to see what might be the next step for me and to find out my results for last 21 day blood test....scared but excited...

Oh cripes really... ((((hugs)))) So Sorry about AF arriving on you. Good that you being pro-active and going to see your doctor. I've been considering doing the same. On one hand I feel a bit silly bcos we haven't been TTC long, but I figure I'm almost 38 and shouldn't let the grass grow under my feet just waiting around to see if I/we are fertile enough to do this alone.

Good luck with that. Will this be the first time you've approached ur Doc about TTC stuff??

3 days off, dinner cooked, & nails done sounds fab!! Is it actually your birthday Wednesday???

I've had two blood tests now, each on cd 21 to measure progesterone and AMH. Got my second lot of results from the receptionist today who said I might be peri menopausal!!? That scared the crap out of me so I've been googling a lot about what it means...but I'm seeing my dr Friday to see what our next step might be....also trying to get my oh to have a semem analysis but he's a bit of a procrastinator when it comes to medical stuff so he's dragging his feet....

Yes, my birthday is Wednesday and my OHs was Monday so we always go out on the Tuesday...off to a Mexican feasts and given my bfn and af showing up....I'll be enjoying a margarita too!

sorry you didnt get your BFP but try and stay positive.. my OH is a procrastinator with the medical stuff too. which irritates me bcos im a nurse and am the opposite.

definitely enjoy a bucket load of margaritas on your birthday Katherine!! have fun and enjoy yourself for the night!!

 

[lexus15]

Good luck on the baby making front greenjelly! We DTD last night, and I'm not sure either of us was really in the mood, but hey at least we gave it a go. It is not the most romantic, but I think he has learnt at least it stops me from getting upset .

My OH is no better..this month was wasted as cbfm never registered I ovulated & to top it OH never wanted to dtd at all this month after we talked about things & HE said we would dtd more. Could literally.

 

[Katherine1209]

So frustrating Lexus, I have the same issue come up too...oh agrees we need todtd more and then we are lucky to bd twice in the fertile week....wtf!

 

[gustav72]

reading your posts and sending out hugs!

 

[janey211]

Katherine, Happy Belated Birthday, hope you had a great day!

Green, am with you. I am on CD11 and started yesterday with AI. doing in at least every other day or every day until CD 20 or so. We need to do AI cause my hasband hurt his back and he is on muscle relaxers and pain killers. Do you think that will hurt his spermies?

 

[Katherine1209]

Hi everyone! How is the week going for you all?

I was meant to go to dr today but got this letter saying I had to pay a fee to have my amh results read!...and from then it will take up to 10 days for the results to be sent to my dr...so cancelled appt cause what's the point if he can't tell me anything yet....

OH and I had a good talk this morning about ttc and he said he is disappointed every month too...he said he likes to think hopeful but that it probably won't be this month....so then when af comes he's doesn't feel really really down about it...makes sense to me but I told him its ofetn hard for me cause i seem to over analyse symptoms and then that has me thinking more positively or negatively...depending on my mood...whether I'm in a glass half empty or glass half full mind set on that particular day

I'm on a mission to get healthy too, Sunday is the day and I'm going to eat better, and walk everyday...sick of being so lazy...

 

[greenjelly]

Katherine, Happy Belated Birthday, hope you had a great day!

Green, am with you. I am on CD11 and started yesterday with AI. doing in at least every other day or every day until CD 20 or so. We need to do AI cause my hasband hurt his back and he is on muscle relaxers and pain killers. Do you think that will hurt his spermies?

oooh good luck Janey! I am insisting on us DTD (by any form possible, mostly AI) every other day and so this is the most sperm I have ever received in a month! I dont see that a bad back should affect his swimmers but I have no medical knowledge at all. Good on him for going along with it when he is pain!
I am going for a first session of acupuncture today. Not sure I want to go now. Not really scared of the needles but just cant see how enjoyable it will be and it is setting me back £70! Feel Id rather spend the money on a nice meal out! And just got emails from 2 girlfriends who have 6 month old babies (one with twins) and both said what hard work it is! Am I ready for that really?!
Katherine how was your birthday despite the arrival for AF? Hope you had a good night.
Kelly, how are you feeling? And Sara, are you ok?

to all xxxx

 

[viccat]

Hi all

I am in the TWW now, and not feeling overly optimistic because my temperatures are all over the place. I am starting to wonder if there is something amiss despite me having a regular cycle and everything looking good (EWCM and LH surge) pre-ovulation.

Got to move house in a couple of weeks though, which will necessitate a change of doctor, so will visit once I am registered with a new doctor.

 

[Katherine1209]

Katherine, Happy Belated Birthday, hope you had a great day!

Green, am with you. I am on CD11 and started yesterday with AI. doing in at least every other day or every day until CD 20 or so. We need to do AI cause my hasband hurt his back and he is on muscle relaxers and pain killers. Do you think that will hurt his spermies?

oooh good luck Janey! I am insisting on us DTD (by any form possible, mostly AI) every other day and so this is the most sperm I have ever received in a month! I dont see that a bad back should affect his swimmers but I have no medical knowledge at all. Good on him for going along with it when he is pain!
I am going for a first session of acupuncture today. Not sure I want to go now. Not really scared of the needles but just cant see how enjoyable it will be and it is setting me back £70! Feel Id rather spend the money on a nice meal out! And just got emails from 2 girlfriends who have 6 month old babies (one with twins) and both said what hard work it is! Am I ready for that really?!
Katherine how was your birthday despite the arrival for AF? Hope you had a good night.
Kelly, how are you feeling? And Sara, are you ok?

to all xxxx

Hi green, had a lovely birthday, oh gave me a birthday girl badge which I was allowed to wear all day and it gave me the power of oh doing exactly as I said all day....it was so much fun!
All geared up for October cycle...positive but realistic!

 

[viccat]

Hi green, had a lovely birthday, oh gave me a birthday girl badge which I was allowed to wear all day and it gave me the power of oh doing exactly as I said all day....it was so much fun!
All geared up for October cycle...positive but realistic!

I'm liking the sound of that badge. It's my birthday soon - I think I will be asking for one too!

 

[Juniperjules]

Hi everyone! How is the week going for you all?

I was meant to go to dr today but got this letter saying I had to pay a fee to have my amh results read!...and from then it will take up to 10 days for the results to be sent to my dr...so cancelled appt cause what's the point if he can't tell me anything yet....

OH and I had a good talk this morning about ttc and he said he is disappointed every month too...he said he likes to think hopeful but that it probably won't be this month....so then when af comes he's doesn't feel really really down about it...makes sense to me but I told him its ofetn hard for me cause i seem to over analyse symptoms and then that has me thinking more positively or negatively...depending on my mood...whether I'm in a glass half empty or glass half full mind set on that particular day

I'm on a mission to get healthy too, Sunday is the day and I'm going to eat better, and walk everyday...sick of being so lazy...

Sounds like a good plan there, the gettin healthy stuff. How long till you get ur AMH results?? Are you nervous? I ask bcos im headed in that direction too i think- the testing stuff.

my OH & I had a good talk today which started with him saying 'so you might be pregnant now right?' ... And I answered him trying to be positive but realistic, basically saying that I guess anythings possible but I doubt it since we might not even have been anywhere near Ov this month. Thanks to my crappy OPKS which I don't think worked. So we have agreed that we're gonna go to the doctor & run the gammet of tests to check if everything is working properly. Which I am SOOOOOOO happy about!! : ) I mean I can't honestly say we've been trying long but I want some peace of mind that we aren't wasting time for nothing IYKWIM?? I'm also going to talk to the doctor about whether we should consider IUI given OH's inability to 'finish' while actually having intercourse. I'm prepared to go at this all guns blazing.

So I'm feeling positive tonite. I'm happy & relieved OH is so up for us both going to the Dr (I mentioned the fact that he is 44 in 2 wks & I'm 38 in Dec... Think that helped my cause!), I'll keep up the Chinese medicine, & fingers crossed we 'could' get a BFP over the next few months maybe......

 

[Katherine1209]

Hi everyone! How is the week going for you all?

I was meant to go to dr today but got this letter saying I had to pay a fee to have my amh results read!...and from then it will take up to 10 days for the results to be sent to my dr...so cancelled appt cause what's the point if he can't tell me anything yet....

OH and I had a good talk this morning about ttc and he said he is disappointed every month too...he said he likes to think hopeful but that it probably won't be this month....so then when af comes he's doesn't feel really really down about it...makes sense to me but I told him its ofetn hard for me cause i seem to over analyse symptoms and then that has me thinking more positively or negatively...depending on my mood...whether I'm in a glass half empty or glass half full mind set on that particular day

I'm on a mission to get healthy too, Sunday is the day and I'm going to eat better, and walk everyday...sick of being so lazy...

Sounds like a good plan there, the gettin healthy stuff. How long till you get ur AMH results?? Are you nervous? I ask bcos im headed in that direction too i think- the testing stuff.

my OH & I had a good talk today which started with him saying 'so you might be pregnant now right?' ... And I answered him trying to be positive but realistic, basically saying that I guess anythings possible but I doubt it since we might not even have been anywhere near Ov this month. Thanks to my crappy OPKS which I don't think worked. So we have agreed that we're gonna go to the doctor & run the gammet of tests to check if everything is working properly. Which I am SOOOOOOO happy about!! : ) I mean I can't honestly say we've been trying long but I want some peace of mind that we aren't wasting time for nothing IYKWIM?? I'm also going to talk to the doctor about whether we should consider IUI given OH's inability to 'finish' while actually having intercourse. I'm prepared to go at this all guns blazing.

So I'm feeling positive tonite. I'm happy & relieved OH is so up for us both going to the Dr (I mentioned the fact that he is 44 in 2 wks & I'm 38 in Dec... Think that helped my cause!), I'll keep up the Chinese medicine, & fingers crossed we 'could' get a BFP over the next few months maybe......

Supposed to be within two weeks, but really waiting for OH to get his arse in gear to get a SA done too... I'm a bit nervous about results but at least I'll know what we are dealing with and what might be the best path to take...My first blood test was for progesterone to see if im oving and that was okay but the second I'm not sure what results are except what my drs receptionist told me...something about perimenopause...??

 

[Kat S]

Same problem here, although not as severe. At least half the time, he doesn't finish, and when he does, it takes 30+ minutes, and that's if he doesn't get a sex headache and have to stop. He has no trouble finishing on his own, which makes me wonder if it's me, even though in my head I know it's not. We're going to IUI next month, but as far as trying at home, I now keep cups and a few 10ml oral syringes around, just in case. He was a little uncomfortable with it at first, but now, no big deal. We can have fun together, and if he needs to finish on his own, he can and I won't be insulted, and his guys get where they need to be one way or another. LOL. Not very romantic, but you've gotta do what you've gotta do.

Wow, Siensasmama, our stories are so similar, except my DH has never finished during sex. He's FINALLY seeing a specialist about it, but in the meantime, we're doing IUI.

Best of luck to you!!!