Raising Children In Religion

[tina3747]

I suppose as you are still practicing your faith, those beliefs stay with you. My friends chose not to continue with the religion for various reasons and they always say they felt very left out and isolated at certain times.

I used to actually go to the meetings at kingdom hall sometimes, they hated going and always used to beg me to go!!
Their dad was a horrid man and I suppose ignorantly enough I've always associated this religion with how he bought up his children. Shame on me!
As much as I respect your views There are alot of parts I cannot understand ... I suppose not just your faith. I won't go into as the debate will erupt ha!
Again I'm sure this stems from my friends dad....

 

[ShanandBoc]

Fair enough, but you cant base a religion on a few people you knew i guess hey Whats important is what they teach and how they teach people to be, if ones dont stick by bible principles and behave inappropriately then thats between them and God.

Just because you call yourself a christian doesnt mean u are one. Its your actions that prove it

 

[smelly07]

shanandboc, can i just aske you something, an old work collegue of mine who is a JW and works within the child sector refusues to take part in religious/christmas/birthday/easter activities as a whole due to her religion. is this soemthing that is stated within the religion or is that a personal choice iykwim?

 

[ShanandBoc]

Hi Smelly07

Its stated in the bible, as in the celebrations have origins which go against bible teachings and stem from worship of false gods etc, i explained briefly on the previous page about Christmas and Birthdays

At the end of the day of course its about personal choice no one is forced to do anything. Hope this helps

 

[smelly07]

Hi Smelly07

Its stated in the bible, as in the celebrations have origins which go against bible teachings and stem from worship of false gods etc, i explained briefly on the previous page about Christmas and Birthdays

At the end of the day of course its about personal choice no one is forced to do anything. Hope this helps

Thank you shanandboc x

 

[ShanandBoc]

No worries, i didnt want to got into it too much on here and turn this into a JW thread

 

[smelly07]

No worries, i didnt want to got into it too much on here and turn this into a JW thread

lol no me neither tee hee.

 

[cherryglitter]

hmm. i don't know. i can see it from both sides.

i guess it can 'start' your child off into religion?! as in your giving them a basis to begin with and then they an make their own decision when they're old enough to understand things a bit better.
but at the same time i don't think religious beliefs should be imposed on anybody, child or not.

so what i'm getting at is i don't really know.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I am not religious. I just care about the earth and the universe, I think general morals are what we need to teach our children. Be kind, respect, hard working, treat others how you wish to be treated. I believe we choose out own destiny and as long as we are decent people that is all that matters. I cant understand how anyone could ever be penalised for being a good person whether or not they believe in a god.

I would say I am holistic.

 

[KaceysMummy]

I think its fine - I don't think it should be 'forced' on them though. I'll be bringing Kacey up in a religion. If it's not for her when she is older, fair enough - it's her choice.
For me religion isn't about set rules and doing things 'the right way' - it's about love...
I think it depends on your own beliefs tbh - for example some people believe you have to live life the correct way and follow the religion fully to be accepted by God and gain eternal life - what parent wouldn't want there child to 'do the right thing' if this was the consequence? If that is what the believe.
I don't think religion should ever come before your children either xx

 

[buttonnose82]

if you follow a certain religion yourself then I think it is pretty much impossible to not raise your child in that religion since it is a part of your everyday life

As long as it isn't forced onto the child once they are old enough too make up their own mind then I don't see a problem

 

[summer rain]

I am Muslim and have been since long before I married my husband (or my ex husband who was also a convert), my children do learn about other faiths but we don't celebrate Christmas or birthdays, I really don't see why when it comes to Muslims integrating into society that celebrating one or two days a year is always seen as a sure sign of Muslims integrating and them refusing to celebrate is seen as causing problems and division-integration involves so much more than that. Muslims are not at all bothered by Christmas though and it always turns out not to be Muslims who have banned xmas lights and so on and so forth but silly do-gooders at the council (or perhaps they are trying to save a few quid!).

Anyway my boys are homeschooled but they mix with other kids of various backgrounds and religions and they attend an after school part time religious school; one we made sure was supportive of integration into society. We do teach them about the basic beliefs of other faiths as well. xx

 

[xolily]

i'm christened but not overly religious and OH is muslim. we're not raising our kids christian or muslim but OH is very strict on them not eating pork and our son being circumcised.

OH's son was here during the holidays and he asked if we'd had our son circ'd yet, i said no and he was like "urgh, hurry up, if you dont he's gonna be really dirty and he won't be able to wee properly, everyone will laugh at him". i was disgusted that this is the kinda stuff he's been told and told OH in no uncertain terms that he best teach his children that everyone has different beliefs.

 

[JackiePed]

It seems simple... For those to whom religion is a very important part of their life, it's unthinkable not to raise their kids with the same beliefs. Why? Because we truly do believe it is true... We aren't speculating, or developing theories. We believe it to be 100% true, therefore why wouldn't we want to pass those truths on to our children?

And for those to whom religion is not as important, it would feel like a false indoctrination of their children to raise them to believe something specific when it comes to religion. So this is (usually) a pretty simple line. Religious parents will raise their children in that same belief system and religion, and those who aren't won't.

 

[AirForceWife7]

It seems simple... For those to whom religion is a very important part of their life, it's unthinkable not to raise their kids with the same beliefs. Why? Because we truly do believe it is true... We aren't speculating, or developing theories. We believe it to be 100% true, therefore why wouldn't we want to pass those truths on to our children?

And for those to whom religion is not as important, it would feel like a false indoctrination of their children to raise them to believe something specific when it comes to religion. So this is (usually) a pretty simple line. Religious parents will raise their children in that same belief system and religion, and those who aren't won't.

The reason why I asked this question is because my Aunt & Uncle are strict Catholics, they however want to raise their child a Christian. Everyone doesn't understand why (not that it's any of their business anyway), but if they believe so strongly in that faith why would they choose to raise their child an opposite religion from what they believe to be fact?

 

[JackiePed]

That is interesting... and rare, I think. I mean, tbh... I can only assume that they don't genuinely believe, regardless of how 'strict' they are, that the Catholic way is the right way... or they wouldn't be raising their kids in a different religion. Though, how they intend to remain 'strict Catholic' but raise their kids mainstream or non-denominational Christian is beyond me... I don't see how kids would really become invested in it if their parents aren't, aside from when they explore and study on their own as they get into teens and young adulthood.

I still think for the most part, if you truly are devoted to and passionate about a specific religion or belief system, you will raise your kids the same way, as how could you not when you truly believe it is right? Religion is so different than, say, political beliefs or general morals... with religion, when you truly believe in it with all your heart... you believe you are dealing with someone's eternal life after death, as well as their well-being and blessings on earth. I can't really see a parent fully believing and not passing it on to their kids in every way possible... it's like saying, "I want my kids to be healthy, but I won't step in if they want to drink poison... they have free will..."
Of course you wouldn't. Since you KNOW with every fiber in your being that poison will kill a child or make them sick, you will certainly do all in your power to ensure they don't ingest it.
However... let's say you don't really buy into the whole organic-foods thing... well, you'll be sort of ho-hum. If they get some, great. But you're not going to be adament that they eat it. That's sort of like those who aren't decided on a religion, or aren't very invested in a religion. If their kids discover a religion that works for them, great...but they aren't going to insist on it, because they aren't convinced it's vital or even necessarily true.

(No... I am not comparing those who don't raise their kids in religion to those who would feed their kids poison.... I was trying to draw a comparison with something that all of us can relate to as something we would, without question, be vigilant about because we KNOW the effects it would have on the child. Many people who believe strongly in a religion would be vigilant and passionate about teaching/raising their kids in it because they TRULY believe it to be 100% true.)

 

[JASMAK]

It seems simple... For those to whom religion is a very important part of their life, it's unthinkable not to raise their kids with the same beliefs. Why? Because we truly do believe it is true... We aren't speculating, or developing theories. We believe it to be 100% true, therefore why wouldn't we want to pass those truths on to our children?

And for those to whom religion is not as important, it would feel like a false indoctrination of their children to raise them to believe something specific when it comes to religion. So this is (usually) a pretty simple line. Religious parents will raise their children in that same belief system and religion, and those who aren't won't.

The reason why I asked this question is because my Aunt & Uncle are strict Catholics, they however want to raise their child a Christian. Everyone doesn't understand why (not that it's any of their business anyway), but if they believe so strongly in that faith why would they choose to raise their child an opposite religion from what they believe to be fact?

No, I am the same...I was raised Catholic, but I am letting my children choose. It does not mean I don't believe, it just means that I have respect for my children. I don't want to force things on them....these are my beliefs. They now attend church on their on will, and that makes me happy.

 

[AirForceWife7]

No, I am the same...I was raised Catholic, but I am letting my children choose. It does not mean I don't believe, it just means that I have respect for my children. I don't want to force things on them....these are my beliefs. They now attend church on their on will, and that makes me happy.

Hey, that's great! That's how I want to go about it with my child, although I am an agnostic. I want her to be fully informed of what it is & why people practice it, but I also think it is her right to choose whether or not she wants to take part in it, not force it upon her iykwim x

That is interesting... and rare, I think. I mean, tbh... I can only assume that they don't genuinely believe, regardless of how 'strict' they are, that the Catholic way is the right way... or they wouldn't be raising their kids in a different religion. Though, how they intend to remain 'strict Catholic' but raise their kids mainstream or non-denominational Christian is beyond me... I don't see how kids would really become invested in it if their parents aren't, aside from when they explore and study on their own as they get into teens and young adulthood.

I still think for the most part, if you truly are devoted to and passionate about a specific religion or belief system, you will raise your kids the same way, as how could you not when you truly believe it is right? Religion is so different than, say, political beliefs or general morals... with religion, when you truly believe in it with all your heart... you believe you are dealing with someone's eternal life after death, as well as their well-being and blessings on earth. I can't really see a parent fully believing and not passing it on to their kids in every way possible... it's like saying, "I want my kids to be healthy, but I won't step in if they want to drink poison... they have free will..."
Of course you wouldn't. Since you KNOW with every fiber in your being that poison will kill a child or make them sick, you will certainly do all in your power to ensure they don't ingest it.
However... let's say you don't really buy into the whole organic-foods thing... well, you'll be sort of ho-hum. If they get some, great. But you're not going to be adament that they eat it. That's sort of like those who aren't decided on a religion, or aren't very invested in a religion. If their kids discover a religion that works for them, great...but they aren't going to insist on it, because they aren't convinced it's vital or even necessarily true.

(No... I am not comparing those who don't raise their kids in religion to those who would feed their kids poison.... I was trying to draw a comparison with something that all of us can relate to as something we would, without question, be vigilant about because we KNOW the effects it would have on the child. Many people who believe strongly in a religion would be vigilant and passionate about teaching/raising their kids in it because they TRULY believe it to be 100% true.)

That's what I was thinking too! Many people in my family have politely asked them & they seem to get very angry when others ask I just wonder why, and to be honest, I think you're completely correct in your statement ... surely if they are full-on Catholics they would pass on their beliefs to their son, but they choose to raise him in a different religion, which is fine. However, I find it very odd that they continue to practice Catholicism (what they believe is fact), but pass on the teachings of Christianity to their son. It seems like it would be very confusing to me, sort of like a family divided almost. You have two parents who believe in one thing, & their teaching their son to believe in another thing that they do not practice. The only assumption that I can really make is that they don't believe in their faith, but they are just so used to being around that religion their entire life, they feel it would be wrong to convert. It's just a guess though, & this is all my opinion. x

 

[twinkle1975]

I'm a children and families worker for a church so it's my job to tell children about Christianity!!

However I've also got a degree in comparative religion and although I was raised in a Christian family I spent a lot of time as a teenager researching other religions and working out how I felt.

If we're lucky enough to have a baby then they'd have to come with us to church as we both go but I'd encourage them to be open about other religions and make their own mind up.

 

[deafgal]

Children should be raised to understand (and respect) their parent's beliefs, It's part of the family... but what they believe in is really up to them. You can't force someone to believe in something they don't. Religion don't work that way.

BUT religious folks do expect their children to behave the way they want to behave (values, morals, standards, whatever) though. Like Baptist women have to wear modest clothing, or muslim wear head scarf (in some countries). Even if they are non-believers, sadly.