Recurrent Miscarriage Thread

[heart tree]

Bumpy, I'm so sorry honey. This is such a rollercoaster.

Lucy, you need to get checked. I'm guessing based on your levels that this pregnancy isn't viable unfortunately. I have two thoughts. One is that you didn't pass all of the tissue so your body still thinks it is pregnant. The other is that it might be an ectopic. Your levels are too low to show anything on an ultrasound unfortunately. I personally think a D&C is in order, but you should ask for another u/s just for peace of mind. I'm so sorry you are dealing with this.

 

[heart tree]

Hopeful, your symptoms sound good even if they are from the progesterone!

 

[Mon_n_john]

Mon- did u trigger you bfp cycle and iui/ stims?

Nope, I haver never taken any fertility meds or done an IUI. It was a natural conception. Just a LOT of BDing lol.

 

[Mon_n_john]

Bumpy, 9babies, and Lucy: I am really sorry to hear about what you are all going through. I wish there was something I could say to help you feel better but I know from personal experience there isn't. All I can do is offer you all a great big hug.

 

[hopeful23456]

i got my other test results back that they did on Sat - they didn't tell me what they were testing for but it was to make sure things were ok as i had the 6 follies release and was on all of those stims. I got a message this morning that my liver and kidneys are fine. thank god they didn't tell me there could have been a problem with my liver and kidneys, i would have freaked out.

 

[Amos2009]

Oh my hopeful....just another thing to have to freak out about. Why would your kidney and livers be affected?

 

[petitpas]

Lucy, that doesn't sound viable to me, either. I would ask for another consultation with your doctor/the epu and ask what they think is going on. Do they suspect an ectopic or molar pregnancy? What is their plan? An ultrasound to look at your tubes or for retained tissue in your uterus?
If you have any questions, you need to get them out of the way first but without hanging around for too long. I am sure your hospital will understand your need to know more about what is going on

 

[petitpas]

Bumpy, how sad and disappointing! Thinking if you

 

[heart tree]

Bumpy, how do you know it is a chemical? Just wondering what your body is doing right now. Are you going to get levels checked by the doctor at all?

 

[hopeful23456]

amos - i think it was to make sure i wasn't developing OHSS

per dr google:
What causes it OHSS?
Fertility drugs stimulate the ovaries to produce many egg sacs (follicles). Sometimes there is an excessive response to fertility drugs and this causes OHSS.

Overstimulated ovaries enlarge and release chemicals into the bloodstream that make blood vessels leak fluid into the body. Fluid leaks into your abdomen and, in severe cases, into the space around the heart and lungs. OHSS can affect the kidneys, liver and lungs. A serious, but rare, complication is a blood clot (thrombosis). A very small number of deaths have been reported

 

[heart tree]

I go for my blood test this friday- thank goodness they agreed to do it then and not wait til my birthday Monday. I assume they will give me the results late that afternoon and if it is a negative I will stop progesterone that day. Of course I will test Wednesday and Friday morning, but will not stop prog until I hear it from the bloodwork. Like you- I am too scared to stop anything until I know 100%. Only thing I am praying for is they will be able to give me the results friday afternoon and not wait til Monday. I really don't want my birthday to be that kind of day.

I really hope you get the results before your birthday too. I'm glad you are getting the bloods done so you can be 100% sure one way or another.

 

[Amos2009]

Wow hopeful....you would have thought I would have read that in all my research about those meds. Good thing I wasn't taking a test to see how much I learned HAHAHA.

So heart and hopeful- It's sooooo slow watching these days go by isn't it? Don't you wish you could go to sleep and wake up in December already pregnant?

And Lucy- I'm so sorry I missed your post earlier. Coming from someone that had an ectopic pregnancy- please make sure they don't wait too long to make a desicion. Stay on them to find out what's going on.

 

[heart tree]

Whew Hopeful, glad you didn't have OHSS! I have read about it, but haven't paid too much attention because I've only done the Femara at a pretty low dose. It's probably a good thing you weren't concerned about it until after you got the good news that you didn't have it!

Amos, I agree, this waiting is dragging. As much as I am a Monday-hater, I'm glad today is Monday because work always makes my days go by much more quickly. This weekend dragged.

I have 2 questions for everyone. How do you deal with social interactions and conversations? Specifically when you see people you haven't seen in a few weeks or months and they ask you what you've been up to. Most of my friends know my story. But when I get that dreaded question, I usually deflect and ask them what they've been up to. In the past 4 months since my last loss I've been grieving, obsessing about IUI, going to therapy, watching a lot of TV and exercising. I really haven't had much of a life to report to people. It gets awkward. Any thoughts on how to approach this? I'm going to bring it up in therapy tonight.

My other question is about sex and progesterone. Those suppositories are messy. I'm using them twice a day and my body never fully absorbs them. My husband had a little panic attack last night when I told him I was starting them today. He thinks we're never going to have sex again! In the past, I've shied away from it due to the mess and also not wanting him to absorb the hormones. What are other people doing about this?

 

[Amos2009]

You probably don't want advice from me on social interactions. I am one of those people that almost any time, any place or any where someone asks me what I have been up or how I have been I always just say good and move on asking about them. I am slowly changing that now (not going into every detail all the time) but close friends know I have changed over the past 2 years and I want them to realize why. It's not just hormonal, bitchy Amy- I am going through one of the most difficult things someone can go through and I am basically doing it alone, since none of my friends can relate. It's a tough balance knowing how much to say when, but if I offend someone, or make them uncomfortable by asking, oh well.

As far as sex- since my last loss -TMI alert- I am never able to have sex without lube- definitely one of those changes I was talking about earlier. So for just sex we carry on like normal since he cannot tell the difference between the lube we use and the suppositories. I definitely do not let him take a trip downtown though. Omg...he would kill me for not warning him. I have heard some say get the deed done before you use the one at night, but sounds like you are like me. I ALWAYS have the cream left over in me as well so waiting wouldn't make a difference.

Have you circled a date on the calendar when you will be testing? Are you having any kind of symptoms now?

 

[bumpyplease]

Bumpy, how do you know it is a chemical? Just wondering what your body is doing right now. Are you going to get levels checked by the doctor at all?

Well I'm presuming it's a chemical because I've started bleeding bright red blood and my AF was due today. My BFP on thurs which was 10dpo was fairly faint, I then retested at 12dpo and still faint, both of these were with FRERS. I'm still getting negative results on ICs. I've got more good tests coming tomorrow or wed so will test again then but this definitely feels like a chemical. Doctors in the uk don't really check blood levels (I wish they did) I would prob just get referred to EPU but they don't see you until 6 weeks and according to LMP I am only 4+4 so a bit of a wait. Also they do a test and if neg you don't get a scan or bloods anyway! I'm predicting a neg test in a few days time and will let you all know the outcome.

Heart, good qu about sex and progestetone I've only started using it this month (and will continue for a few days just in case) but I wondered about that too!!!! Interested in everyone's thoughts....

 

[heart tree]

Thanks Amos. I react the same way you do with friends. Say I'm fine and then change the topic. It gets tiresome to keep telling people that I'm sad, depressed and not doing much these days but surviving. But at the same time, I want them to know. My therapist had a good point. She said that in the past, and in other cultures, there is a visual way to indicate you are in mourning. People used to wear black for an entire year as a way to visually tell people to be kind to them. I wish we still had something like that. I want a visual reminder to tell people what I've been through so they don't ask me what I've been up to. I'm get annoyed by the expectation that I should be "up to" anything. Grieving is exhausting and time consuming.

Thanks for the sex tip. My husband would definitely know the difference between the cream and my natural juices! And yes, that cream is ALWAYS there for me. But maybe we'll just go for it anyway. And I definitely wouldn't let him take a trip downtown either. He would kill me too.

As for testing, I will be 13dpo on Thanksgiving. Blah. I'll probably test on 12dpo and if it is negative I may wait until 14dpo so I don't have to test on Thanksgiving. I doubt I'll have that kind of control though. I'll probably keep doing tests every day until I test out the trigger and then keep going. I'm an addict that way.

 

[heart tree]

Oh Bumpy, that's just awful that you can't get bloods done! I had no idea I was pregnant with my ectopic because I had what I thought was AF, right on time, though it was a lighter AF than usual. A week later I started having some more bleeding and thought it was weird. I kept doing pregnancy tests the entire time and they were all negative. I was using ICs, not FRERs. I got a blood test and found out it was positive, but the level was 32, which is why it was negative on an IC.

I'm not suggesting an ectopic for you. I'm not even suggesting a chemical. Bleeding happens. I think it's good you are still going to use the progesterone and you are going to keep testing. I know other girls in the UK who have gotten blood tested after RPL. Maybe you could insist based on your history? I don't know the NHS well enough so not sure how it works for you. Sending lots of hugs your way.

 

[petitpas]

Heart tree, I have been avoiding people. I know it's sad and lonely sounding but I just can't cope with much at the moment.
As for the progesterone question, mine comes in the form of a waxy bullet. You can use it in your vagina but it works just as well up the bum. So, that's where I mostly use it. Not because of sex but because I generally have to go to the loo within an hour of going to bed and when I pee it melts out the vagina (maybe I'm just loose ). If I use the back package I can go for a wee and it stays in.
Now how is that for TMI!?

 

[35_Smiling]

Lucy529: :wave: I am so sorry your going through this roller coater ride. With my of my m/c my hcg was going up and down as well. With each u/s they couldn’t see how I could have even had a hcg because they didn’t see anything. Then in the end I was in so much pain and they found this hug lump outside the tube but not in the uterus ..they called this a corneal pregnancy. Each u/s showed no baby…nothing! Until a month later…ask your doctor about it…in corneal pregnancy they will not see anything in the u/s until the last minute…hope they can sort your issue out asap…

Petitpas:

LeeC: :wave:

Embo78:

9babiesgone: :wave: I know this is hard for you. Please try to keep strong hun. you are in the right place for support here.

bumpyplease: damn.. I am sorry hun.

hopeful23456: :wave: good luck this iui cycle! lets hope those cramp feelings are part of implantation! good to know all your test are okay..

Amos2009: o my sorry for your computer wow on the first night?? That’s mug.. hope you are able to get it fixed. Now that sounds like some good baby to me get your freak on!! Good luck this cycle Amos shame on you…you gotta wait more time hun..now don’t you be worrying yourself too much give it a few more days or so before the next test…okay

Heart tree: :wave: hey hun good luck this iui cycle! do you have to stop the progesterone? You can’t keep taking them until the end of the cycle or if you get a That’s what my fs wanted me to do..

Razcox: CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR !!!! :yippee: this one is a winner and a sticky bean!

Jennijunni: :wave: I am sorry for your loss :sad: I hope something would be found in the tests. Then you will be able to move on from there. Good luck

Mon_n_john:

 

[heart tree]

Thanks Pip, I was thinking about the "back door" option. I wasn't sure if that was safe or not. Mine specifically says it is to be taken orally or vaginally. It looks like a little yellow egg.

And I know what you mean about not going out. I try to avoid it. That's part of the problem. When I finally do go out and see people, they ask what I've been up to and I have nothing to tell them! It is lonely, I agree.

35, I plan to take the progesterone until the end of my cycle or BFP. My concern is that the BFP will come too late, like Hopeful's did at 17dpiui. I don't want to keep taking them past 13 or 14 dpiui. But what if I'm pregnant and I stopped them for a few days and then found out I was actually pregnant. I just hope that if I am pregnant, I'll get a BFP early and won't have to worry about this scenario.

How are you doing? How is the bean?