Recurrent Miscarriage Thread

[hopeful23456]

all of my friends have kids and have no clue about rpl, i tell them this is kind of what it is like. imagine tomorrow that all of your kids just died, and you have very little chance of ever having more. then everyone around you keeps on talking about their kids. how would you feel?

 

[heart tree]

all of my friends have kids and have no clue about rpl, i tell them this is kind of what it is like. imagine tomorrow that all of your kids just died, and you have very little chance of ever having more. then everyone around you keeps on talking about their kids. how would you feel?

That's a great approach. I've often thought about saying something similar, but so far haven't had to. While none of my friends have ever had one loss, never mind several, they are pretty good at being compassionate.

But I'm going to keep this one in my back pocket, just in case!

 

[hopeful23456]

ok - the pic was taken at my wedding from one of my friends in Oct, 2010, back when i was happy and probably drunk at that point. now if you saw me, i have a sad look on my face alot of the time.

 

[heart tree]

Oooh, I see you Hopeful! You are so lovely!!! I hope that smile comes back to your face very, very soon.

I need to change my avatar. I want to show my face, not my bum.

 

[heart tree]

Hey girls, I just stumbled upon this website. It is called Share, and it focuses on Pregnancy and Infant Loss. They have a blog section and I started reading some of them at: https://www.nationalshare.org/blog.html

There are some really nice pieces written. One that I particularly gravitated towards was about strength. I get so sick of people telling me how strong I am and how they could never be as strong as me. I usually tell them I don't feel very strong. What I want to tell them is that I don't really have a choice in the matter. I'm dealing with the crap hand I've been dealt. It's not strength, it's survival. Anyway, this piece helped me to view strength in a different light. It helped me to realize I am strong. I want to share it all with you as I think we are all strong. If you feel like reading it, you can find it here: https://www.nationalshare.org/blog.html?entry=strength

 

[hopefulmama2b]

He told me to do it the day after an "almost positive" opk. What the heck?! It confused me since everything I read on the internet said to do IUI the day after a positive opk, ie: day of ovulation. I called the office and voiced my concern and they had me come in for a dominant follicle scan. My follie was 20mm so she told me to schedule for the next morning even though I didn't have a true positive yet. When I woke up the next morning I took another test and it was almost there, but not yet. So I sent hubby to his collection appointment with a picture of my opk from the morning. The Dr said- oh ya, that's perfect. If we wait until it's positive it's too late. She's probably going to ovulate in the next 12 hours. Ummm....I think we all know, except for my highly educated reproductive endocrinologist, that you o 12-36 hours after the positive. Not right after it turns positive. So we did it and of course this morning my temp is still low. I'm assuming today is ovulation day so I feel like we should've done the IUI today. Just irks me cause that's $300 down the drain if the timing is off. $300 isn't bad, but several months of $300 does add up. Next month I'm with you, Amos, we're doing it on my timing! And like every single website out there says- day of o!

DH says trust the doc, but after having so many bad ones I just can't...

 

[hopefulmama2b]

I feel like I'm being a complainer! It's done with and I need to just let it go! Was just curious how they timed your guys' IUI. I'm done! Let it go, hopeful, let it go!

I totally hope I eat crow this month with my complaining.

 

[hopeful23456]

hopefulmama - you have every right to complain! i've only done 3 times iui's on stims with triggers and iui is 36 hours after trigger. are you going to add meds so they can time everything by monitoring it?

i do think washed sperm live 24-36 hour too though. i've heard 12 hours for frozen sperm.

 

[hopefulmama2b]

so is yours timed to be on day of o?

He said I don't need meds since I don't have a problem O-ing. I'm going to do 2 months unmedicated and then make an appointment and see if he will try meds.

 

[hopeful23456]

Oooh, I see you Hopeful! You are so lovely!!! I hope that smile comes back to your face very, very soon.

I need to change my avatar. I want to show my face, not my bum.

that's funny - i thought it was a cool picture and didn't think about it being a picture of your butt

 

[hopeful23456]

so is yours timed to be on day of o?

He said I don't need meds since I don't have a problem O-ing. I'm going to do 2 months unmedicated and then make an appointment and see if he will try meds.

i don't have a problem o'ing either, cycles always the same, they just want to have me on meds and time it all to make sure it's all calculated out for the best chances of big juicy eggs at the right time given 4 unexplained m/cs. as the meds make the follies big and they monitor them until they are big enough. so instead of having just the 1 egg/month release on a nomal cycle, the meds give you more follies for more chances.

if i do the trigger shot on a Sun night at 10am (trigger makes you O) then do IUI around 36 hours later (ends up being around 37 hours later as that's when i think the trigger shot kicks in the follies to o?) i don't do opk during these cycles as it's so timed with u/s and meds. i was even taking shots last cycle to make myself not O until I gave myself the shot to O.

i really like knowing the details of the follies/timing, etc as when you are spending $, you want it well spent. I'm lucky as insurance has paid for most of my appts and meds.

are you going to an RE?

 

[35_Smiling]

35 - read your post, yes, because we stole the land - what a strange thing to celebrate..

cruel Americans

all of my friends have kids and have no clue about rpl, i tell them this is kind of what it is like. imagine tomorrow that all of your kids just died, and you have very little chance of ever having more. then everyone around you keeps on talking about their kids. how would you feel?

now that is one deep thought but GOOD POINT…I must say…sooo what they said after that??

ok - the pic was taken at my wedding from one of my friends in Oct, 2010, back when i was happy and probably drunk at that point. now if you saw me, i have a sad look on my face alot of the time.

your beautiful! Ya gotta smile more hun…god will bless you I am sure. Love the pic!

Oooh, I see you Hopeful! You are so lovely!!! I hope that smile comes back to your face very, very soon.

I need to change my avatar. I want to show my face, not my bum. [/QUOTE]

that's funny - i thought it was a cool picture and didn't think about it being a picture of your butt

that’s because there isn’t any!

Hopeful, at the rate you are going through FRERs you won't be able to make Christmas with children, either, as you'll be too broke to buy them presents!

I have to agree lol

35, technically, Thanksgiving is supposed to be about how the Pilgrims and Indians made nice with each other and were able to have a dinner together in harmony. But in reality, there was a pillaging of Indians and their land. In my house, I actually changed the name of Thanksgiving to “Native American Appreciation Day” and read a Native American poem before we eat. .

that is creative but the fact remains lol have fun on Nov.24th. I wonder if the Indians celebrate it as well though…Mmmm interesting….

Oooh, I see you Hopeful! You are so lovely!!! I hope that smile comes back to your face very, very soon.

I need to change my avatar. I want to show my face, not my bum. [/QUOTE]
Ya cracking me up here Yeah want to see butt lol here is one… BAM! IN YA FACE Now that's a butt! i cracked up when they took this pic...lol

 

[hopefulmama2b]

Yep, seeing a RE. I even researched him and he's "award winning". Who knows. I'll question him about it if this doesn't work. He said the meds tell your body when to o and since your body knows we don't want to mess with that process if we don't have to. Since we've got pg so easily in the past I think he thinks it's unneccesary for me. Like I said, I'm giving it 2 cycles! Then request meds after that! I wouldn't mind having more targets.

 

[hopefulmama2b]

BAM! IN YA FACE Now that's a butt! i cracked up when they took this pic...lol

 

[35_Smiling]

BAM! IN YA FACE Now that's a butt! i cracked up when they took this pic...lol

i know crazy me lol

 

[hopeful23456]

that's so funny 35!
when is asked one of my friends to imagine childless world, she said she would just volunteer at her kid's school to be a part of things they are a part of. so it wasn't too similar so told her to imagine they all died as young babies. she just feels so bad about the whole situation but is a stay at home mom to 3 so really can't image what my life is like.

hopefulmama- i think you should ask for meds - i get preg pretty easily too (every 3-4 months of trying naturally ) - i had to take a long time off before the septum surgery and to get all the bloods/tests back in 2010.
But, how old are you? with my age, we are trying to move things along quicker...

are you in MN?

 

[heart tree]

Hey Hopefulmama, don’t stress about stressing! I don’t even think you were complaining. This TTC business is CRAZY making. Especially after all we’ve been through. My experience with my first IUI was that I had a 19mm follicle on Tuesday. They told me to trigger the next day between 10pm and midnight. I did it at midnight. According to everything I’ve read, the trigger should force me to Ov 36 hours later. My IUI was scheduled for 37 hours later. I did OPKs up until I did the trigger and they were negative. Once I did the trigger, I couldn’t do OPKs anymore since it would show a positive due to the hcg in my system. So, I had to just have a leap of faith that I wouldn’t Ov before the IUI and it wouldn’t be to much later after the IUI that I Ov’d. I obsessed that it wasn’t timed right either, though I have no evidence of that. It was hard for me to let it go. I think we want so badly to be in control of this uncontrollable thing. Any ounce of control we can have, makes us feel better. You have every right to question your doctor about this. It is just as much an art as it is a science.

35, that is one juicy booty! Yum yum!

 

[35_Smiling]

honey tree i tell you! lol

 

[hopefulmama2b]

hopeful-I'm 31. I know that is still young, but when I've been at this for over 1.5 years it's more urgent to me. I just keep thinking- my 30 year old eggs were bad what the heck are my 32 year old eggs going to be like?! In the past I've fallen pg quickly (2 months each time), but something is differnent now and not sure why. This is my ninth cycle trying this time around. I just worry that my three D&Cs caused damage, but he assures me they didn't. I'm hoping my body is just waiting for the perfect healthy little egg because it knows I can't handle anymore heartache. And I'm in Missouri- so not far from MN!

 

[hopefulmama2b]

"honey tree" 35- I imagine you as having a permanent smile on your face. Which is refreshing in this neck of the woods on BnB!