Recurrent Miscarriage Thread

[stephtaylor86]

Hi girls.

Just wanted to say hello as I think I am probably joining you. I had a MC in Oct last year a day shy of 8 weeks, was a complete MC that happened at home. I passed the sac which was grey in colour and quite firm, about the size of my palm (sorry if tmi but it relates to my next question!!)

Anyway, had a BFP on New Years Eve 4 days after my period was due. Has preggo symptoms like sore boobs and sickness which i didn't have with the first. On the 3rd I started spotting, which turned into period blood with clots. The biggest clot I probably passed was about 1cm in size. The bleeding is now very light and if I hasn't taken the damn preg test I would have passed this off as a normal period, just a week late! anyway, this has confused me as, even though I know I was only 5 weeks, surely there would still be something to pass like the first time? I have called the GP who didn't seem interested and told me to call back in a week if I was still bleeding. Called EPU who said they wouldn't scan til 7 weeks so take a test in 2 more weeks and if its still + come on in! (Grrr!) Do you ladies think I have had a chemical preg or an actual MC? I'm scared of retaining tissue and then causing more problems in the future.

The real kicker of this whole mess is that my boyfriend is 13 years older than me (I am 24 and he is 37) He has had 3 MC's with his ex-wife and they were referred for tests and he has no chromosone probs and his sperm is better than average. And now he has had 2 MC with me! feel so bad for him and understandably, he is getting to the point where he just wants to stop but I'm determined to be a mum!!

Sorry for the long post, but I have ghosted loads of MC forums but never got my story out...

 

[fifi-folle]

Sorry for your losses Steph. I've had 4 early miscarriages all of which were around 5 weeks, with them I only passed clots and some stringy tissue but never saw the sac. At that stage the sac is only 5-10mm so it's small enough to pass without you being aware. There's nothing I can suggest. We have had all the tests done and been sent away with "It looks like you've been unlucky, just keep trying" which is what we have done and I am now 13 weeks. It's heartbreaking to go through losses again and again and even when you do get pregnant it's difficult not to worry as you know what the possible outcome could be. Take time to recover, talk to your OH and speak to your doctor, explain the situation and see if you can be referred for the blood tests now rather than waiting to see if it happens again (although next time you may get a sticky bean, you never know - which is what kept me going)
Good luck.

AFM Surprisingly still pregnant, keep expecting to see blood every time I go to the toilet. Got our scan on Monday when I'll be 13+2 really hoping everything's ok in there.

Fx for sticky beans this year for everyone x

 

[mrs_lukey]

How do you keep going? I'm in the process of losing my 5th baby now and I can't deal with this anymore x

 

[Rabbittchild]

Steph, am sorry for you losses, I agree with Fifi-folle with 3 out of 4 of my mcs I didn't notice passing anything so hopefully it will be a complete mc and you won't need surgery. some units will refer you for testing after 2 mcs if you're persistant so good luck and i hope you get your sticky lo soon.

fifi- that's great news I hope all goes great at the scan.

Mrslukey - I'm in the same position and wondering the same thing

 

[fifi-folle]

Mrs lukey I kept going because I couldn't imagine not trying again. I mentally couldn't cope with the idea that we might miss conceiving "our baby" because we stopped trying. It's a weird way to think but it's what's kept me going, the thought that our forever baby was just waiting for the right time. This is just what helped me, it's one way of looking at what is an impossibly painful situation.

 

[stardust22]

Mrs lukey I kept going because I couldn't imagine not trying again. I mentally couldn't cope with the idea that we might miss conceiving "our baby" because we stopped trying. It's a weird way to think but it's what's kept me going, the thought that our forever baby was just waiting for the right time. This is just what helped me, it's one way of looking at what is an impossibly painful situation.

This is my 4th pregnancy (after 3 miscarriages, 2 of them at almost 12 weeks and needing operations due to missed miscarriages and baby not wanting to come out )

I am only 5 weeks but everytime I have lost one I just think...ok I have to try again. I feel that the only thing keeping me going is the thought that "next time" just might be my forever baby and that it will be right this time. The heartbreak is never easier and I am attached already to my baby that is growing. I just try and think positive and stay calm. Its just so hard some days and being on this thread with all you lovely ladies who are experiencing that same as me makes me sad. Its not fair that we are here!

to all of you and may we all get our FOREVER baby!
x

 

[want2bamum86]

hi girls well i am 8 weeks with my 7 baby so fx this one sticks lost twins in 2005 after giving birth and 4 mc last yr so pls dnt give up

 

[moonmama]

So sorry for your losses mrs lukey and stephtaylor . Stephtaylor with the mc I had 5-6 weeks I didnt pass anything of any significance compared to the ones I lost after 8weeks. Its a horrid thing to go through though whatever the stage x

Mrs Lukey it is so so hard to keep going through this. I've just had my 5th too and not sure if I can do it again. I suppose its only something you can decide but no one would blame you for not being to face it again! x

Rabbit I cant do the trial now anyway because I'm now too old Having said that I wouldnt want to risk getting the placebo anyway! x

 

[petitpas]

all round!

I think I would be happy to try out steroids next time round. I'm not even bothered to have the invasive biopsy.

Hubby and I have decided to wait until our London appointment before trying again. Then I'll give them one chance to draw all the blood they want and we'll get right back to business. Still no letter from the hospital so I will start phoning around on Monday.

Why do I keep going in general? Because I know I can get pregnant and I know I can survive another loss however hard it is. And I'm greedy: I want at least two children! I'm also the wrong side of thirty so I want to hurry up.

 

[reedsgirl1138]

Ladies. Keep fighting ladies. Miracles do happen. I am 26 weeks after 4 mcs. I lost a twin with this pregnancy so 5 really. But keep after your drs tell them how you feel. And keep trying drs til they really listen to you. I did and he listened and did all the right things to help me carry this miracle.

 

[stephtaylor86]

Thanks, you guys have been helpful. I asked my GP what I should expect to 'come out' at 5 weeks and she was really vague, didn't really seem to know herself. Was kind of hoping that maybe it was just a bleed and by some miracle I would still be pregnant. Sigh.

I'm determined not to give up whatever it takes, even if it's another 10 years of heartbreak before I get my baby. All I've ever wanted to do is be a mummy and I refuse to be childless!!

Fifi - It really gives me hope that despite early losses you are at 13 weeks! I can only imagine the kind of paranoia I would have at that stage!

wanttobeamum86 - Good luck, I really hope this one works out for you!

 

[stardust22]

Ladies. Keep fighting ladies. Miracles do happen. I am 26 weeks after 4 mcs. I lost a twin with this pregnancy so 5 really. But keep after your drs tell them how you feel. And keep trying drs til they really listen to you. I did and he listened and did all the right things to help me carry this miracle.

Congratulations with your miracle baby boy!
What has been done differently this time ?

I am now on clexane, aspirin and progesterone after 3 miscarriage and 2 of them after heartbeats seen. I came back positive to the thromophilia screen (stick blood) although he would of liked 2 positives before confirming 100% of me having it but I got pregnant before this was done

 

[Lamburai1703]

Hi all. I saw Siobhan Quenby in September and she is no longer doing the NK cells trial. They are doing the Promise trial now so she will try and recruit you to that instead. It is a progesterone trial which some folk might be interested in. PM me if you'd like details.

NK cell can be detected in the blood apparently but it is not as accurate. I still intend to have the test but the NHS are pretty unhelpful with this. I saw a consultant called Tim Child at the John Radcliffe in Oxford (who was one of the most insenstive shit wits I have ever encountered) who said until I had 5 miscarriages he wouldn't even test for it and even then they might choose not to! It is available privately and the blood tests ranges from £200 to £700, but obviously you have to factor in at least another £200 for an appointment in the first place.

My consultant (private) has prescribed me the treatment for NK cells "just in case" so some of you might want to go down this route if the test is unavailable/too costly.

Hope that helps a bit.

 

[Chilli]

Thanks Lambu - I might start pressurising mine for the same. What is the treatment?

Petit - hound them! I have had terrible waits for appts and find that having got my name has helped a bit - but have low expectationsof their organisation - not trying to depress you just don't want you waiting too patiently like I did.

 

[petitpas]

Ok. Phone calls tomorrow morning it is then

 

[Lamburai1703]

Thanks Lambu - I might start pressurising mine for the same. What is the treatment?

Petit - hound them! I have had terrible waits for appts and find that having got my name has helped a bit - but have low expectationsof their organisation - not trying to depress you just don't want you waiting too patiently like I did.

The treatment is steroids (prednisolone) until 12 weeks.

 

[Rabbittchild]

Thanks ladies, you're a mine of information. I'm going to try and speak to the Dr at my local EPU who has been with me through all my miscarriages and will have a chat with her about options and maybe just prophylactic steroids/heparin treatment - will be interesting to see what she says, although she might just say try again with just the aspirin. I know I just feel like throwing every drug at our next pregnancy so that something might work.

Am feeling quite low at the moment, keep having nightmares about miscarrying - last night it was twins at 31 weeks. I hate my brain! Only two more days til the scan and then at least this mc will be confirmed.

to all

 

[Lamburai1703]

I agree with the throwing drugs at the problem issue. It is exactly how I feel.

GIVE. ME. THE. DRUGS.

 

[Rabbittchild]

 

[Razcox]

I just want to see someone now to at least feel like they give a dam i have lost 3 babies! They took my bloods 3 weeks ago and i know they said it can take 3 months to get an appoinment . . . Wish i could aford to go private i really do