September loss thread, TTC our rainbow babies

[MorgansMom09]

Hope everyone's had a good start to the new year. I think I'm coming down with the flu, it's been going around and I've just felt off today, my husband had it right before new years so hopefully after me it'll be done at this house. I'm currently 9 dpo and eager to start trying again this next cycle.

 

[Myshelsong]

It seems like everyone has the flu, i really need to get the flu shot this year!

Good luck on this cycle morgansmom baby dust all over you!

Getting my lining checked tomorrow and then we find out how close we are to the FET. Hoping it wont be too much longer or a wait. I feel like the days and hours are just standing still to see if i will break something.

I am horribly conflicted at times about moving forward with the FET. Especially since I should be delivering this month. it still seems so surreal and crazy that we are starting all over again. It is hard to feel hope when all I feel is grief ... do you guys feel the same way?

 

[MorgansMom09]

Yes whole heartedly. I feel like we've got so used to grief that were not comfortable enough to let hope back in. Good luck with FET

 

[Myshelsong]

Thanks so much, I sometimes feel crazy alone in this grief.

Are you guys going to be using opks or temping? I know how crazy stressful that all is, not fun at all.
Fingers crossed for you!

 

[MorgansMom09]

If it doesn't stick this time around yes, I want to get some opks. But that's as crazy as I'll let's myself get right now. We've only been trying for 3 months so Imuch trying not to stress to much.

 

[Myshelsong]

So we are having the FET this Sunday.
I am so happy and scared. And the prometrium is no helping, so out of it today!

How is everyone else doing?

 

[MorgansMom09]

Well no sign of AF yet today. And my opks came early on Tuesday so I an at least prepared. Hopefully she never shows up

 

[MorgansMom09]

Day 3, still no AF and still getting BFNs. I have a doctors appointment Tuesday for my yearly check up, so if she doesn't show by then I'm asking for a blood test. I feel like I'm going crazy. But I don't think stress would make me late because I'm actually less stressed than the last couple months and she came right on schedule almost to the exact same time too.

 

[MorgansMom09]

Oh and good luck tomorrow Myshelsong!

 

[Myshelsong]

Morgan I hope your af stays away. How did you track ovulation is cycle? I hate it when af is later and all I got see negatives. Drives me CRAZY!!

I am excited, terrified and everything in between about tomorrow. I can't believe it is tomorrow it feels like forever, but it also feels like I blinked and here we are again.

What are you doing this weekend to keep your mind from giong crazy?
We are heading to a movie I think, maybe a quick dinner out. Nothing fancy.

 

[MorgansMom09]

Working to stay busy. It's not working as I type this from the store bathroom lol

 

[StillPraying]

Myshel how did it go?

Morgan any sign of the witch?

I'm sorry I haven't been on much, I find it harder and harder to watch others get their bfps when I should be miserably pregnant right now. My due date with Luke is in less than a month and I'm just....struggling. I had comforted myself with the thought that I'd be pregnant again before that date but here I am on cycle #5. Ugh sorry for the pity party. It hit me so hard tonight for some reason....probably because yet another girl at work announced that she's pregnant.

 

[Myshelsong]

Don't worry Still. I have been crying each night because this is his birth month. It has been so much harder than I thought it would be, I thought I could get through Christmas and be ok, but I am not. Hubs isn't either, he has been crying along side me a few nights talking about him. Big hugs. You have to take care of yourself as well, if you need space take it.
Even with this FET I am happy and hopeful, but still sad and grieving. I hope to god I will get pregnant but I know that even if I do it will be bitter sweet.

So FET went off without a hitch yesterday. We have 1 4bb little blast on board and I am just praying it sticks around.

 

[StillPraying]

I try not to bring it up around dh or anything because it just makes him angry. I'm just focusing on getting healthier and learning how to just be. I'm considering taking up yoga, I've tried it a few times and enjoyed it. Anyone here do it?

I'm keeping you in my prayers that this little bean sticks Myshel!!

 

[MorgansMom09]

Well AF decided that yesterday, while I was running at the gym, was the best time to show up. So that answer that question. Uh of all the months she had to be late it would be the one that I'm scheduled for a pap smear. At least I was able to reschedule that for next week. And now I can at least put my opks to use. I guess I'm looking at the bright side because now the timeliness would not be the same, but unfortunately now if I get pregnant I'm going to have to pass his birthday and that'll be rough. I guess it could let
Always be worse and I could still not be pregnant by then too.

 

[Myshelsong]

I am not great at it, but I love doing a few yoga stretches in the morning when I get a chance. I would love to do it for real one day but I am so uncomfortable in front of people I don't think I could work up the courage. I would fall over and toot I know it!

Sorry af hit. I hope next cycle is your month.

 

[StillPraying]

Sorry AF showed Morgan, but it's nice to hear you are looking at the bright side of things

Myshel that's hilarious lol

 

[Myshelsong]

It is funny but true. I do it is my own house, so I know I will do it in public.

My emotions are crazy high and low today.
How is everyone else feeling?

 

[StillPraying]

I got this today please don't be a chemical please please please

 

[Myshelsong]

Ahhhh!!!! Fingers are crossed so much for you! How many dpo are you?
Sending you lots of and