Soap in the Mouth....

[louandivy]

Piper you are so unbelievably insensitive I don't even know what to say. If these people had otherwise loving and decent parents but made one bad choice probably passed down through their parents that does NOT make them abusive parents. It makes them uninformed.

It's weird how you were concerned with men being unfairly labelled misogynists in my other thread yet you are happy to label parents of actual posters on here as abusive and to trivialise something as traumatic as rape.

 

[TennisGal]

Firstly, I don't see anyone saying 'you know what, pass me the soap, it's 100% something I am going to do'.

Someone saying that they had it happen to them and they are ok does not translate as them condoning it and saying they want to go with it full steam ahead. I may have missed something, I will go back and check.

And I'm sorry, the use of language to compare a quick bit of soap in the mouth to oral rape is the only vile thing I've read on this thread. In fact, I find it downright disturbing,

 

[Piper84]

Vile? Being upset that someone labels it "oral rape" is vile? Wow.

Speechless.

It's weird how you were concerned with men being unfairly labelled misogynists in my other thread yet you are happy to label parents of actual posters on here as abusive and to trivialise something as traumatic as rape.

And I'm sorry, the use of language to compare a quick bit of soap in the mouth to oral rape

Don't you dare misquote me to score points. I said that forcing objects into people's mouths is considered in some jurisctions as oral rape with a foreign object. I didn't intend to trigger memories for victims of sexual abuse but now you are making it worse by constantly repeating the word for everyone to read again, and again, and again. Think about what you're doing.

It's clear there are massively diverging opinions on this and I stand by what I said. Forcing a child to ingest soap is abusive, no matter how many times it occurs.

 

[Andypanda6570]

I said I did threaten my boys when they were young ( Big now) but I never did it. Just like people say i am going to beat the shit out of you, they just say that aren't actually gonna beat the shit outta ya. Like when you say I am going to kill you? Not really going to kill the person They are empty threats and my boys weren't 2 when I threaten them with soap. They got the point through. Like I said I could have never done it, but things were different back then in 1991 94 and 2000, not saying it was right, but it was just something I said and I said it once maybe twice. But to come out with such an offending comparison I am sorry , I may not be up to date with baby feeding and sleeping and all that other great stuff, but I know right from wrong and that was just a horrible thing to say .

 

[TennisGal]

I have no interest in scoring points at all. Why would I?

I just feel that some of the comments made on this thread have - quite clearly - crossed an acceptable line and made several people feel uncomfortable. I don't think it's fair, empathetic to fellow posters or remotely sensitive.

 

[TriChick]

Vile? Being upset that someone labels it "oral rape" is vile? Wow.

Speechless.

It's weird how you were concerned with men being unfairly labelled misogynists in my other thread yet you are happy to label parents of actual posters on here as abusive and to trivialise something as traumatic as rape.

And I'm sorry, the use of language to compare a quick bit of soap in the mouth to oral rape

Don't you dare misquote me to score points. I said that forcing objects into people's mouths is considered in some jurisctions as oral rape with a foreign object. I didn't intend to trigger memories for victims of sexual abuse but now you are making it worse by constantly repeating the word for everyone to read again, and again, and again. Think about what you're doing.

It's clear there are massively diverging opinions on this and I stand by what I said. Forcing a child to ingest soap is abusive, no matter how many times it occurs.

Score points? How dare you. You made the reference that it could be considered "oral rape" in some jurisdictions. Might I suggest you think twice before throwing that word into ANY conversation, as it is one that will ALWAYS trigger an emotional response. The nerve you have to insinuate that I would use the term rape to "score points" is appalling to say the absolute LEAST. This isn't some sort of contest. You upset people, plain and simple. Think about what YOU are doing when you refer to people as vile.

 

[Piper84]

I have no interest in scoring points at all. Why would I?

I just feel that some of the comments made on this thread have - quite clearly - crossed an acceptable line and made several people feel uncomfortable. I don't think it's fair, empathetic to fellow posters or remotely sensitive.

I don't know. Why would you deliberately misquote me other than to make a statement about something?

I agree the legal definition was a bad choice, and if I could make the choice again I would probably not have added it to the debate.

Now the problem is people making it worse by repeatedly bringing up the offending contribution just for the sake of being outraged, when they have nothing more to add to the debate.

 

[TriChick]

I have no interest in scoring points at all. Why would I?

I just feel that some of the comments made on this thread have - quite clearly - crossed an acceptable line and made several people feel uncomfortable. I don't think it's fair, empathetic to fellow posters or remotely sensitive.

I don't know. Why would you deliberately misquote me other than to make a statement about something?

I agree the legal definition was a bad choice, and if I could make the choice again I would probably not have added it to the debate.

Now the problem is people making it worse by repeatedly bringing up the offending contribution just for the sake of being outraged, when they have nothing more to add to the debate.

You referred to people as vile. That will outrage them.

 

[Piper84]

You referred to people as vile. That will outrage them.

Really? Who, exactly, did I refer to as vile when I said:

making a joke out of this kind of punishment and condoning it while accusing those who condemn it of being hysterical and misusing certain vocabulary is absolutely vile

?

 

[TriChick]

You referred to people as vile. That will outrage them.

Really? Who, exactly, did I refer to as vile when I said:

making a joke out of this kind of punishment and condoning it while accusing those who condemn it of being hysterical and misusing certain vocabulary is absolutely vile

?

My apologies. Our act of condemning the use of the term was vile. Correct?

 

[TennisGal]

If I've misquoted you, I apologise.

I do not give a hoot about being outraged for the sake of it, and I take great offence that you suggest I do. I'm outraged that comments have flown around that have caused distress to posters. I am also cross that my choice to defend the feelings of said posters has been labelled as outrage for the sake of it or point scoring.

For that, I stand by the sentiments

And I have made salient contributions to this thread, which have been overlooked, perhaps.

 

[Piper84]

You referred to people as vile. That will outrage them.

Really? Who, exactly, did I refer to as vile when I said:

making a joke out of this kind of punishment and condoning it while accusing those who condemn it of being hysterical and misusing certain vocabulary is absolutely vile

?

My apologies. Our act of condemning the use of the term was vile. Correct?

Bingo.

 

[TriChick]

You referred to people as vile. That will outrage them.

Really? Who, exactly, did I refer to as vile when I said:

making a joke out of this kind of punishment and condoning it while accusing those who condemn it of being hysterical and misusing certain vocabulary is absolutely vile

?

My apologies. Our act of condemning the use of the term was vile. Correct?

Bingo.

Not an improvement whatsoever.

With that, I'm done. To the ladies who shared their personal experience in hopes of shedding light on the sensitivity of the term, hugs to you all.

 

[Piper84]

You referred to people as vile. That will outrage them.

Really? Who, exactly, did I refer to as vile when I said:

making a joke out of this kind of punishment and condoning it while accusing those who condemn it of being hysterical and misusing certain vocabulary is absolutely vile

?

My apologies. Our act of condemning the use of the term was vile. Correct?

Bingo.

Not an improvement whatsoever.

Apparently you don't see the difference between accusing me of calling people vile and viewing the downplaying of abusive behaviour as vile. Not my problem; just don't lie about what other people have said.

Thanks for "shedding light" by constantly repeating the original trigger. I would have deleted my offending post, but thanks to you and a few others the word has been repeated in almost every post in this thread, so it won't make a difference.

 

[robinator]

Can we move on to hot sauce now? It's a food product

 

[robinator]

Thanks for "shedding light" by constantly repeating the original trigger. I would have deleted my offending post, but thanks to you and a few others the word has been repeated in almost every post in this thread, so it won't make a difference.

You're mad because people are taking you to task? I've been ripped to shreds in threads for having differing opinions but I don't blame other people. The words came out of my mouth, not theirs.

 

[LoraLoo]

Can we move on to hot sauce now? It's a food product

But its inflicting pain. But then I dont agree with smacking

 

[robinator]

Can we move on to hot sauce now? It's a food product

But its inflicting pain. But then I dont agree with smacking

seems like soap has run its course

 

[LoraLoo]

Can we move on to hot sauce now? It's a food product

But its inflicting pain. But then I dont agree with smacking

seems like soap has run its course

I know. And i was responding that i dont agree on inflicting pain by putting something in my childs mouth that is going to hurt them

I dont really think it matters WHAT you are putting in their mouth- the aim is the same, to scare the child in to not swearing again. I dont want to scare my children, I want them to learn.

 

[oneandtwo]

Can we move on to hot sauce now? It's a food product

*giggles* good shift!

In most jurisdictions, hot sauce will actually get your kids taken faster than soap because it can cause serious, permanent damage. While some states do not consider soap in the mouth abuse, so far from what I have researched most of those same stas consider hot sauce abuse. What people seem to be failing to realize is that usually why things get deemed as illegal is because too many went to en extreme with it and seriously hurt someone either physically or emotionally. This is why spanking can be considered abuse in some jurisdictions. In Florida in 08 a woman had her two children taken from her permanently because she put soap in their mouth for an extended period of time. While we would like to think that everyone who.soaps their kid is doing it out of love(???) Many do not, they do it with the intent to hurt and mistreat their child which IS abuse by every sense of the word.

The emotional responses to the term abuse is ridiculous, has anyone bothered to figure oit its exact definition?

a·buse**(-byz)"tr.v."**a·bused*,**a·bus·ing*,**a·bus·es**1.**To use wrongly or improperly; misuse:*abuse alcohol; abuse a privilege.*2.**To hurt or injure by maltreatment; ill-use.

hurt**(hûrt)"v."**hurt*,**hurt·ing*,**hurts*"v.""tr."*1.**To cause physical damage or pain to; injure.*2.**To cause mental or emotional suffering to; distress.*3.**To cause physical damage to; harm:*The frost hurt the orange crop.*4.**To be detrimental to; hinder or impair:*The scandal hurt the candidate's chances for victory."v.""intr."

You see? If you are putting anything inside the Childs mouth or doing anything to harm them, or cause them distress, it is by the very definition. Abuse. It could be very easily said that you are abusing th soap too, you re not using it as its intended purpose considering it is not intended for consumption.