Somebodys comment disturbed me...shall I say anything?

[pinkie77]

The situation in the op is extreme but to agree with some other posters, the majority of parents I know expect their babies to sleep through by around 3/4 months. I'm seen as the weirdo who won't let her baby cry and whenever I say it's normal for babies to wake past 6 months I'm shouted down. I've been told it's my fault fi still wakes cos I give in to her and should just ignore her as she's being manipulative! People really do still believe these things sadly.

 

[mummy2lola]

I wish I hadn't read the post now,as I'm just thinking about that poor neglected baby.

There is a chance she was just talking crap tho thinking she sounded clever for some reason.

Plus I haven't read any of the posts that followed the op but I'm guessing there's an argument somewhere and normally I would read but this one has been done so many times and it's always with the same people that it's all being repeated and I'm bored of it so sorry if I missed something important xx

 

[emilyjade]

i seriously remember why i stopped coming into this part of the forum now! Some of you women are so plain damn rude, what happened to being kind to one another and supporting each other

I know!! Scares me sometimes... And honestly I've noticed it is the same people most of the time. Poor girl. So sorry. We are here to support and offer advice. They obviously were not. RUDE!

Glad I'm not the only one who thought this. I felt embrassed for the girl. I would hate someone to belittle me like that.
Let us know how the phonecall goes tomorrow

it is mainly the same people who start, drives me crazy. Think i'll be sticking to the grotto until it closes now

What is the grotto? Maybe i will check it out.

grotto is santas grotto just below general chatter, so friendly and no one judges! come over and have a look

 

[Cinnamon Girl]

reading this and the responses broke my heart and made me feel ill

 

[sam1984]

how close are you to your friend. maybe have a word with her in general conversation and see if it concerned her or if it was the other girls weird attention seeking. if she is concerned or found it alarming maybe they are close enough that she can bring it up

 

[cat lover]

how close are you to your friend. maybe have a word with her in general conversation and see if it concerned her or if it was the other girls weird attention seeking. if she is concerned or found it alarming maybe they are close enough that she can bring it up

Excellent advice IMO

 

[Babushka99]

Maybe not as young but the majority of mums I know use or recommends CIO. It is standard practice & I've met people who have sleep trained from birth but they love their children dearly and wouldn't want any harm to come to them. That is the way people do it unfortunately. But its the parents choice.

 

[amymarx]

Omg the poor thing!! I'd like to lock that women in a room for 13 hours with no food and leave her to sit in her own filth! That is neglect and I would be inclined t phone social services, her tough shit attitude is a disgrace!

It reminds me of the NSPCC ad were it says something like "Charlie has learnt that it doesn't matter how hard he cries, noone will come..." something like that anyway!

 

[stepmum]

Omg the poor thing!! I'd like to lock that women in a room for 13 hours with no food and leave her to sit in her own filth! That is neglect and I would be inclined t phone social services, her tough shit attitude is a disgrace!

It reminds me of the NSPCC ad were it says something like "Charlie has learnt that it doesn't matter how hard he cries, noone will come..." something like that anyway!

That ad haunts me..that is why I will never leave LO to cry for more than 10 seconds.

 

[tiggerpony]

Oh my god..........can't believe some of the replys Ive got on here. Yes my LO has STTN pretty much from 5 weeks old - however at around 8/9 weeks she started going through a realy rough patch of being awake a lot and I didn't know why or what to do - hence that other post! For goodness sake, I wouldnt think some of you on here were grown women! Thank you all those people defending me... but it makes me not want to come on here anymore if I have to justify myself when I want advice. I am a new mum and still learning guys, give me a break those who are being rude?! x

 

[summer rain]

Maybe not as young but the majority of mums I know use or recommends CIO. It is standard practice & I've met people who have sleep trained from birth but they love their children dearly and wouldn't want any harm to come to them. That is the way people do it unfortunately. But its the parents choice.

I'm sorry but I haven't come across this, the only person I have met who does CIO was an American friend. I did CIO with my eldest when he was 11.5 months old; I regret it now but I haven't met anyone else who has done that at any stage really; aside from the American lady who I am no longer on speaking terms with (not just because of the letting her 1-2 month olds CIO and never checking on them at night but various other parenting and general issues also). To say everyone does it just because people you know do it, isn't really accurate.

 

[mummy2lola]

My friend always said she would never so cc or CIO but her 11 month got to the point where he just wouldn't go to bed and sleep,the second 7pm came he just screamed until he could leave the room and get overtired in the sittingroom.she said it was the worst five days ever whilst they did the cc but now she sees it as the best thing she ever did for him as he now self settles in his cot really easy.she never wouldve done it any younger but I don't think I could do it at any age xx

 

[Lauki]

Let's not start another CIO/CC debate shall we .

 

[cissyhope]

Maybe not as young but the majority of mums I know use or recommends CIO. It is standard practice & I've met people who have sleep trained from birth but they love their children dearly and wouldn't want any harm to come to them. That is the way people do it unfortunately. But its the parents choice.

let me get this right,its standard practice for the mums you know to leave a 4 week old baby from 7pm to 8 am? iv never done CIO or CC but that was not my understanding of it? theres nothing controlled with that and i thought it was done with older babies?

 

[Divinebeauty]

And.... another thread turned into the CC/CIO debate.

 

[tiggerpony]

This thread wasnt about who uses CIO or CC....it was about advise I needed and as I have that advise I think the post shoukld end now before it gets any nastier. I didnt think the post woukld go like this just from me asking for advise if I should say anything to anyone....please guys theres enough shit in this awful world without bitchyness going on, on a forum that's ment to be friendly. Once again thanks for everyones advise. I think I am going to report it just be to be on the safe side.

 

[Juicybaby88]

This I find very worrying and it concerns me what might happen to that poor child either now or in the future! If this woman can be so ruthless now when they are so dependant, just imagine what she will be like when the child is older! I wouldn't even hesitate about ringing the relevant organisation, this child does not deserve this.

 

[Itsychik]

This thread wasnt about who uses CIO or CC....it was about advise I needed and as I have that advise I think the post shoukld end now before it gets any nastier. I didnt think the post woukld go like this just from me asking for advise if I should say anything to anyone....please guys theres enough shit in this awful world without bitchyness going on, on a forum that's ment to be friendly. Once again thanks for everyones advise. I think I am going to report it just be to be on the safe side.

I've read through this whole post and have no comment to add. Really, everything that could (and some things that shouldn't) have already been said.

However, if you do report it, would you keep us updated on what happens/what they say? I'd like to know for my own piece of mind... thanks

 

[franny_k]

Possibly another thing to consider: if she does leave her baby for this amount of time at night, there could be other issues of neglect happening in the day (I think someone else mentioned this a few posts back from Manchester). Personally, I would contact SS. I contacted SS regarding our neighbours and my concerns regarding their chilld. Essentially, I'd rather be wrong than have something terrible happen and know that I did nothing. SS visit quite frequently now so there must have been issues and the young girl seems a lot happier, too, although I don't really know her. There were a lot of "parties" and people coming in and out of the house with police round a lot due to girl and her partner arguing/ fighting. Perhaps SS were already on the scene but I wanted to make sure that they were aware of what was going on.

It's hard to work out what to do in that situation so I feel for you but ultimately you have to think of the child. Good luck x

 

[deafgal]

CIO is NOT recommended for newborns. they have such a small tummy and can get dehydrated easily. Plus, they need comfort and love. I wouldn't turn this into a CIO debate.

oh, and I doubt the mother was exaggerating the situation. There's no reason to.