Support thread for ladies who have had 3+ failed IVF cycles

[ashknowsbest]

unlucky - My doctor said since I was on BCPs prior to the cycle and they are controlling everything that it's fine. Since I will be doing PIO to maintain my lining I think that helps too as I won't get a period until I stop that. I trust my doctor, been through 6 cycles with him so hopefully it'll be fine I think that's one of the benefits of doing a FET cycle, they're a lot more flexible. OMG august 31st is so close! Do you know the sex of your baby? You get to meet you LO so soon!

AQ - they do have it easy. Honestly every man reacts different emotionally but I think even on the emotional side they have it fairly easy. I mean most men aren't super emotional anyways. I know my DH gets upset but never cries about our infertility and he also tries to stay strong for me I'm sure. I'm pretty emotional without female hormones raging around in my body and the meds just make it worse

 

[bugs]

Ash and Sarah hope both your cycles is the final step in your journey. Wishing you both the best of luck xxx

Jo you are so close now, I've been told that the tens machines are really good so may look into that myself.

Sarah I'm fine thanks for asking, I don't post too much after my little altercation with someone on another thread I'm sure you remember our thread had been taken over by baby talk so I try to keep it to a minimum. I know you all like to hear updates as i do so of course I will keep you all posted. Today I am very pleased to have made 24 weeks V day I think it's called. Baby is getting more active and even with the anterior placenta I am feeling kicks. I thought I would be nice & relaxed at this point but as my sister had a prem baby at 27 weeks I think I'm even more anxious, analysing every twinge. Still feel like I've got ages left but I'm sure it will be here before I know it xxxx

 

[africaqueen]

Yep totally agree! my dh tends to favour sticking his head in the sand tbh but i am very 'vocal' with my emotions! haha. I guess each person deals differently. I find that we women have to be the strong ones tho x

Well ladies, had a stressful few hours! called docs receptionist to get viral blood results so i can arrange faxing them to the clinic and she says 'there is a issue with your hep b test and doctor wants to speak to you' well obviously we know we have been monogamous since we have been together an had clear tests 3yrs ago but still been stressed awaiting the call?! anyway, doc just called and said the wrong test was done. It was a hep b immunity test which obviously shows we are not immune seeing as we have never had it or been immunized against it, so we need to go in the morning for more bloods for 'hep b core' which i have no idea what it is but the clinic need us to have it before treatment can commence so more bloods and more nightmare for dh as he is terrified of needles! Grrrrr. Dh also needs to go to the clinic on Wed morning for another SA. None stop tests once the ball starts moving again isnt it. Think i forgot all the groundwork BEFORE actual cycle can start. lol xxx

 

[africaqueen]

Cross posted there Clare! happy 24 weeks! soooo happy for you!! time is flying by altho im sure not for you glad all is going well xxx

 

[Unlucky41]

Hi All

I can't believe that it is almost time now. I as ready as I can be. My body is full of aches - back and legs but very thankful that I am finally here! DH said he can finally be excited as we are so close and we should be in the clear now.

Bub - yes DH should do all the nappy changing and settling from my perspective but I am really scare as DH has not held a baby before! How is yours with kids?

AQ how could they get the test wrong? Dcotor's bad handwriting ? DH always struggled with producing his sample so totally can relate to your husband but yes compared to us it doesn't compare right ?

Ash- we are going to have a little girl although I don't think she will be too little already estimated to be 3.2kg last week already. Sounds like your doctor has all things covered. Ash my pregnancy was from a FET hence I hope this is it for you! I think you are heaps more relaxed doing a FET instead of a Fresh. I think the worst part is just waiting for it to work!!

 

[africaqueen]

Jo- It was not so much our GP that got the test wrong, basically what happened was, our clinic was going to charge us £500 for our viral bloods to be redone and so i asked our GP could she do them for free which she kindly agreed and asked me what needed doing. I emailed our RE and asked him and he replied HIV, Hep B and C and rubella immunity. I just relaid this info to our GP and she did the bloods. It was only that another Doc picked up on the fact the core test had not been done that he called us to say that is the relevant one for IVF so hence the mix up really x

 

[africaqueen]

Hi ladies

Well me an dh have just been for our bloods for Hep B core and all my other results were there but dh's are missing?!! so the doc was not happy at all and has redone all dh's bloods. Results should be in by Monday latest and then i can get them faxed to the IVF clinic. Hope things start going smoothly from now! don't need all this added stress before the cycle even starts. Just got our invoice too so off to transfer the money. My account will look very healthy for first time in a year for all of a hour before i make payment! haha xxx

 

[Sandy83]

Hi Ladies

Sorry I've been MIA, still need to catch up on posts as DH got admitted into hospital last tuesday due to an infection he had a very scary episode! All better now but was in hospital on IV antiobiotics till sunday.

Well the time has come my WFT appt is this afternoon, haven't been to the clinic since my failed cycle in Feb due to DH's condition hopefully be able to come away from this afternoon with a plan for the end of the year

Hope everyone is doing well and will catch up soon xx

 

[ashknowsbest]

sandy - good luck at your WTF appointment I hope they have some answers for you and your DH. Sorry to hear that DH got an infection but happy after the antibiotics he's feeling better! Let us know how it goes.

 

[Peachy1584]

AQ what a pain in the ass! I was lucky as new RE didn't make us redo all that even though they were "expired". You know these last 2 fresh cycles (thanks to a gal on here) i applied for the First Steps program and got half off my stims. It's income based and I'm not sure if it's available in the UK and if it's not maybe there are other programs available for the there since I know we don't use the same meds but it's worth looking into and they give you an answer within 48 hours.

Sandy so sorry about your scare! You really deserve a break and I hope this appt goes well for you and leaves you feeling hopeful

Ash yay for having a date! Hope it goes by quick for you! My husband did my pio for me (so did others) i never felt comfortable with trying to do it in my behind area : )

Bubu and Dovkav hope you ladies are feeling great and babies are perfect!

Unlucky I think you're going to have think about a name change! : )

Hope everyone else is well! So glad to have football season back it's the best time of year : )

 

[Sandy83]

Well appointment went as expected no really answers to why it hasn't worked yet but plan is to start FET in November so just need to ring nearer the time for drugs and dates. Xx

 

[Peachy1584]

Sandy I wish you had some answers. Have you been at the same clinic this whole time? I know you can't do much different since it's a frozen cycle but have you don't the endo scratch? I did it this time and they told me it can be very beneficial. Hope time passes quickly and smoothly for you. Sometimes when we're taking care of others we forget to take care of ourselves. Take time to treat yourself to things you enjoy hon

 

[Unlucky41]

AQ - I hope from now onwards everything goes smoothly. Did your GP do all the extra test or did you have to pay out of pockets ?

Sandy - how is dh doing now? It is good to get the WTF appointment out of the way so you know what is the plan going forward.

Peachy - haha I don't think I can change the name yet ! I feel very blessed that it is finally happening for us.

AFM - We have our c section book for this coming Monday. My fluid levels is starting to be too low hence safer to take her out. Doctor suspects my placenta no longer working as well!!

Only 5 more sleeps!!

 

[Sandy83]

Wow 5 more sleeps and your miracle will be here sounds like the c section is the right move

AQ, sorry you have had to go through all this stress and hope that the hard part is out the way and everything else just falls into place

Ash, How's everything going not long now

Dovkav & Bubumaci, How you both doing

Plex, How you doing, have you had WTF appt? (Sorry if you have already posted)

Hope anyone I've missed is doing well

DH is doing good getting back to his normal self, Off work after today so i can spend sometime with DH before he goes in for his transplant booked a local hotel for the night over the weekend so i can spoil him rotten before a 4 weeks hospital stint! So looking forward to that xx

 

[bubumaci]

Jo .. my goodness ... it is here already.
DH has absolutely no experience holding babies. Didn't even hold his nephew (born last November) even though I said he should try and get some practice Last week at the baby-preparation-course he put on the doll's nappy ... And then while I was dressing the doll, I was talking to it, telling it how well it was doing, using a soothing voice (didn't even think about it, just came naturally *lol*) and he totally laughed at me, thinking it was weird that I was talking to a doll
Will definitely be thinking of you Monday and looking forward to an update and some pictures when you are up to it

Sandy, I am so so sorry to hear that DH suffered an infection! Very glad to hear that he is OK now and also that you will have some together-time before he has to go in for his transplant. When is that? Will definitely be sending out prayers for the two of you!
Sadly, on this journey, there - more often than not - isn't always an answer as to why it doesn't work. We never got an answer, just the assumption, that the embryos we were transferring were in some way chromosomally abnormal and that they stopped developing / body rejected them. i.e. it was just nature at work. I mean the two times we had chemicals (before the bfp), we transferred two beautiful looking blastocysts each time ... No rhyme or reason, just the way Mother Nature works some times. It is of no consolation to the couple, desperate for it to work...
For the last tries we had, they did an endo scratch (which is really supposed to help) ... as Peachy suggests, maybe that is one thing you could bring up?

Sarah - fingers are now tightly crossed that nothing else goes wrong with the bloods and that it can be smooth sailing from here on in!! So annoying, when "external influences" screw up and there is nothing you can do about it. Sometimes makes you wonder if they have any idea what they are putting the patients through with their incompetence?

AFM ... I have been so good updating my journal (and the groups I am on on Facebook), that I have been terrible updating anywhere else. Incidentally, anyone who wants to read and stalk my journal is most welcome *hint hint* The link is in my siggy...
Soooo there has been a lot going on the past week or so. Last week on Monday we went to a breastfeeding seminar which was very interesting. Then on Wednesday, to the baby-preparation course, which was also pretty cool. That was held at the birthing centre we were registered and at the end, I asked the midwife, whether having the gestational diabetes would influence my being able to give birth there ... sadly, it does and I no longer can give birth there. So I promptly started researching clinics - the first one that both of us liked was where we visited the breastfeeding seminar last Monday (they are certified as baby-friendly and have a fantastic policy on breastfeeding, 24-h rooming in with the baby etc. etc.). Also, I promptly stated my desire to have a Doula at the birth supporting me / us. So the hunt for the doula began. I found a few that I contacted and tonight we are meeting one and on the weekend (Saturday + Sunday) another two. At least I can now be relieved that I will have a Doula and don't have to worry about not finding one.
Then on Monday I was at various appointments. First, for the gestational diabetes - we agreed to up my dosage at night to 8IE (maybe 10) and that I would send her the readings for Monday and Tuesday (and not just 4 times a day, but 7 - fasting, before eating and after eating 3x a day) ... did that and this morning she told me to up my night dose to 12IE and to inject 4IE in the morning too....
Monday afternoon I was at the birthing centre we had been registered at and wanted to know if they would still carry out the "after-birth-care" now that I wasn't giving birth there any more. They said they would and would let me know who would come out to me after team discussions today. So I was relieved.
In the evening on Monday we then went to the hospital we had listened to the breastfeeding seminar at (info evening) and feel pretty comfortable that that is where we will register at for the birth. So next week I will be ringing to get an appointment for the registration. Also, with gestational diabetes, I won't be able to come straight home again, as baby P. will need monitoring to make sure that his sugar levels are OK (poor little bean)...
This afternoon, the midwife-led facility rang me to tell me that the midwife who would have been coming out to look after me / us will be on her honeymoon during the first month that I need her (it is the practice here for midwives to visit you on a daily basis in the beginning to make sure everything is OK) and would I please look for someone near where I live (even though hard, because I am very late looking for someone now). She confirmed if I couldn't find anyone, that they would somehow do it. ... anyway, long story short, I managed to find someone with availability and she is coming for a "getting to know you" meeting on September 2nd. Decided I won't look further, don't need the stress - but luckily, I have someone now

So ... that is the excitement going on at my end at the moment ... here is my bump-picture from Monday, when I started into the 30th (OMG!!!) week!

Hugs to you sweet ladies and lots and lots of for the upcoming tries!!!

 

[dovkav123]

Unlucky, 5 more days and you'll be rewarded with your little one!
Sandy, it's time for your hubby's transplant! I hope and pray all goes well like always.

I had my 21 week scan yesterday.
The baby's head was near my belly botton, my tears went down my chin. I was so emotional to hear this. All the measurements head, belly, hips were dating between 21w1d-21w4days. We saw black spots in the tummy and in the bladder, it means liquid is there, digestive system is developed nicely. His heart was beating strong 140bpm and I could see 3 beautiful heart valves. We will not find out the gender. EED It's on the 26th of December on my birthday!!!! I am so happy, excited and blessed that little 8w2day(last u/s) peanut grew in a such a big and healthy pomegranate.
In the hospital I was told that no much craziness going on in the end of the year, more births are in Summer.

Varicose vein on my left leg and overall pain in my legs are the only comlaints I have so far. I have mild Gingivitis also, after prof. teeth cleaning the bleeding has stopped. Dr. prescribed compression stockings to manage my bulging blood vessel on my left leg. Have you used them, do you know if somebody else wore them?
My mom has varicose veins and so do I. It's genetic, I have week veins, and during pregnancy they showing up. It's not big deal. It's only a cosmetic problem, my varicose vein may dissapear after the delivery, if not there are some options to remove them. The good news is that I do carry lots of genetics from my mom, and I hope I carry her "easy delivery gene" too ( she delivered 3 kids quick and easy, without even pushing, they came out like from the cannon.
I realised that pregnancy puts your body on a huge stress and this way you can find out your weak spot in your body. It is a chance that by the time I am 60 I may need to repair my varicose veins and implant my new teeth.

 

[bubumaci]

Dovkav - that's wonderful news! So happy for you!
I'm surprised they're changing the due date - in cases when IVF is done and the exact date of conception is known, they don't usually change it (some of my scans Baby P. has been behind - right at the beginning - and in the later scans, he was measuring earlier - but the don't adjust the EDD). Still, very exciting that it looks like baby will come around your birthday

I'm sorry to hear about your varicose veins. I have heard that they can be quite painful! Let's hope that they do go away after baby is here!
In the first trimester I went and had my teeth cleaned and had my second pregnancy cleaning today. Even though my teeth are OK, I was told to floss more and to also use the mouthwash more...

I have not been wearing them, but I had the compression stockings prescribed for my flight to the US. Really tight ones - so I have had some practice putting them on and taking them off. It is hard work putting them on, but your legs do feel lighter when wearing them and they prevent your legs swelling... I suppose I could have worn them for the rest of the pregnancy, but I wanted to keep on eye on whether or not my legs were really swelling and so far it has been OK - just after looooong bouts of sitting. So so far I haven't been wearing them. Also, you should wear them only when you are up (so not during the night) and after two days, wash them, so that they spring back to the original tighter form. Might be a good idea to get a few pairs so that you are not constantly washing the same pair to wear. They have them in different styles and colours, so you can be quite stylish wearing them (and not look like a frump with only brown ones *grin*). xx

 

[LadyLovenox]

Hi ladies!! LOVE seeing some of your pregnancies progressing...gives us hope! Had my wtf appointment today and basically:

No real answers as to why it didn't work. She says an "egg issue" again, but it's not a quantity issue, it's a quality issue. Although she expected my perfect blasts to stick.

We will cycle again in Oct.

Microdose Flare Protocol 225 menopur 225 follistim

Endometrial scratch beforehand

Lovenox and prednisolone

Both Estrogen and PIO will be injected during tww

She said MOST patients my age (30), with DOR are able to use their own eggs, sometimes it just takes several tries. She said if it was her, though, after this time, if we don't get a pregnancy, she'd go the DE route. I'm just not ready for it yet. We have 6 fresh cycles in our shared risk, and this will only ("only"..haha) be fresh cycle 4, so she can keep on tryin' cause I'm far from giving up!

Much love to you ALL! It's so nice to read your stories and feel like someone understands, as I watch all of my friends get pregnant the first few months of trying. (UGH!)

 

[Unlucky41]

Sandy - how are you going to spoil your husband ? glad to hear he is back to normal and good on you being so supportive!!

Bub I lover the bump - 30 weeks you don't have long to go !!! I think the husbands will just have to learn on the job eh ?

Dovkav- looks like your scan went well such a sigh of relief after the 20 weeks scan. You can really start to relax and enjoy the pregnancy !! Hope your veins don't bother you too much.

Ladylove - I agree it is too early for you to consider donor eggs. hopefully this is the miracle cycle but I am sure they can do a few more things for you before you have to consider DE. What is you amh?

 

[ashknowsbest]

dovkav - Not long now! And on your birthday, how cool!

Bubu - sorry about the GD. Not long now for you either!

lady - sorry you didn't have an answer from your doctor. I know how you feel about going the DE route. I'm not ready yet either but I do want a family sooner rather than later. Good luck with your October cycle!