Support thread for ladies who have had 3+ failed IVF cycles

[ashknowsbest]

sandy - everything is going pretty good. I had a bunch of problems gtting my medication and keeping both of my clinics in sync but we're finally in the last phase and I couldn't be happier. I just started my PIO last night and it's not that bad. I remember it from my 3 IVF cycles so it's not a big deal. Transfer in 4 days!

Hope you and DH are doing well and taking some time to spend together before his transplant.

 

[africaqueen]

Sandy- Hope dh is ok and im sorry you didnt get any answers as such at your wtf appt. I always find those darn things to be a let down! good luck x

Lady- I get what u mean about not wanting to 'give up' with your own eggs but i have made the decision that 4 cycles is plenty with my own eggs so if this next cycle fails( god forbid) it will be a DE cycle for sure. Can't take anymore heartbreak knowing what a slim chance i have but determined to give it one last shot x

Dov and Bubu- Glad all going well with your pregnancies and cant wait to share my stories too! pma pma! haha x

Ash- Ooh only 3 sleeps till transfer now isnt it?! good luck x

Jo- Omg you are gonna be a mother soon!! eeeek! so excited for you and cannot believe how fast time has gone!! x

Hi to all the gang x

AFM- Not had the best few days. Been very emotional and tbh dh has been crap support once again. I am lucky i have my dad for emotional support at home an u ladies on here. So once again i just have to be the strong one and its tiring but hopefully worth it! fingers crossed xxx

 

[LadyLovenox]

Unlucky... Thanks!! My Amh is 1.33.... Last afc was 22. They got 17 eggs out of me, 11 embryos but only 3 made it to blast, so the doctor thinks they're not quality eggs they're getting. she doesn't act like there's much else they can do that they haven't tried. Sigh

Ash.... I'm sorry we are in the same boat, but I'm glad to have someone who understands. Hopefully your next cycle will be it too!! Are u in the middle of an fet?

AQ... I hope I didn't come across that using DE is "giving up". It is in No way giving up, and people who go that route have fought harder than anyone! I know the heartache of feeling like your eggs keep failing. Ugh. I will pray that this next cycle is your miracle.... Regardless if the chances... Its absolutely possible!!! I'm sorry about the lack of support from dh.... I think our husbands run out of things to say and are just as frustrated as us, but don't know how to show it as support

 

[ashknowsbest]

AQ - sorry hubby isn't being very supportive right now. Infertility is hard on everyone. Even our hubbies! Hang in there

lady - I'm in the middle of a FET. I go in for transfer on Monday, final scan on Sunday.

 

[africaqueen]

Lady- No you didnt come across like that all! Going the DE route is the most brave as ladies who end up with DE babies have been to hell an back to get them and all we are giving up on is our own eggs, not our baby dream i hope an pray we both get lucky this time around but at least we know we have plan B x

Ash- thanks. Just so hard. I do accept men deal with things differently but it is also selfish to not think about the other side and that annoys me but hey i am a tough cookie an i will get thru, hopefully even stronger and as a MOTHER please god! x

Hi to all the gang x

Bugs- How are you doing? x

MrsE- dont know if u are reading but thinking of you x

AFM- Feel a lot calmer today thankfully. Went for a coffee on my own before work an had a half hour time out which i needed. I am going to do it more often. I need to put myself first during this cycle. I always think of others needs too much an need to start putting myself first and being kind to myself during this cycle xxx

 

[bubumaci]

Lady hmmm - I don't think that your doctor need be pushing you towards DE so soon. I was under the impression that DOR just means that you don't have that many ova in your ovaries, but not, that their quality is poor. Your response to the stims doesn't to me seem to indicate poor ovarian reserve at all!
In our experience, it doesn't necessarily mean that the egg quality is poor if the fertilised embryo doesn't develop to a blast (we can count on both hands how many of ours did!!). It can be the sperm, it can be the egg or it can just be that the fused egg is chromosomally abnormal and won't develop better.
The plan for October sounds good (also with the endo scratch, as well as the oestrogen + progesterone support during the TWW) and all fingers and toes will be crossed for you!
I think you will have to decide for yourselves at which point you want to stop trying with your own eggs and going for DE - but at this point, if you are still OK with stimming and ER and everything, then I think it is a bit early

Sarah I'm sorry you were so down ... this awfully rocky journey can get even the strongest person down at times! We do all bounce back, but it is so very trying. And you do need to care for yourself and look after yourself! Have you looked into the MP3s I suggested for IVF (hypnotherapy)? It forces you to take that half hour for yourself, closing doors, turning off phones, making sure you aren't disturbed and really just concentrating on yourself.
Glad, that you're feeling better today

MrsE Thinking of you, Sweetie!

 

[LadyLovenox]

Ash...I am so praying for your FET, for good luck, for God's blessings, and for your journey to be wrapping up!! Hugs!!

AQ...Definitely pamper yourself during this time! Anything that makes you feel good, relaxed, and stress-free! I have recently read a book called "The Power of your Subconscious Mind" by Joseph Murphy, and I could not recommend it more!! It is simply amazing, and it truly helps to turn your mindset around for the positive!!

Bubumaci...Oh thank you, thank you, thank you! Your message was good for my soul! Sometimes I feel foolish NOT going to DE if they're recommending it, so hearing that someone else thinks I could still be in the game with my own eggs is just so uplifting! I am debating so much right now over whether to take birth control pills before we cycle or not. We have every time, and I just feel like that might be suppressing me...maybe I'd get better quality or more blasts if I didn't start with bcp. My RE is willing to try it, but also says that I'll be in danger of getting a lead follicle without being suppressed first, which would cause my cycle to be cancelled so I'm really worried about that....cycles are costing us about 4 grand each time in meds, so it's a big gamble. I've also read about Estrogen Primed Microdose Flare Protocol, which I want to ask about too. My RE is willing to try whatever I want, but I sort of hate that too, because I feel like the decisions are all on my shoulders, and I"m no expert!

 

[bubumaci]

Lady, that is really frustrating, that they won't advise you / take the lead on how to stim! It is interesting, the different methods! I didn't have to take BCP nor did I down-regulate for any of the cycle - it was the aggressive protocol each time (just once I changed doctors at the clinic, trying different combinations and protocols).
If your clinic has and uses an embryoscope, then I would definitely recommend that. Our fertilisation results were always amazingly good (considering DH's sperm, lack thereof / quality of), but the embryo development was not that great ... once using the embryoscope it definitely improved.
I think you need to discuss pros and cons with your RE, get them to advise which protocol would be best - it shouldn't be you telling them, they are the experts ...
Being no expert myself, of course I cannot judge how your eggs are, but I know that the doctor started thinking (being not the youngest any more) that my egg quality might not be that great any more (I did respond well the meds - too well at times, with OHSS). I started taking a high dose of CoQ10 (from NOW, maximum strength, 600mg), Resveratrol (both suggested by my doctor) - both improve cell-regeneration. In parallel, I am taking Zinc; get your vitamin D levels checked and also your thyroid. My thyroid levels were perfect for a healthy woman (at 2,1 or thereabout, sometimes 1,7) - specialists said, that when trying to conceive, a TSH level of around 1 or below is better, so my TSH levels have been artificially adjusted...
So maybe there are a few things you can do, to try and improve things at your end. Taking the supplements for a couple of months might be a good idea?
Anyway, a combination of taking everything, plus the varied stim plans, plus the additional shots + embryoscope ... it took several tries, but we got there (I still can't believe it, despite Pünktchen moving around to let me know he's there) - and I really am praying that Jo, Dovkav and I can bring some good luck to this thread and spread heaps of ... xxx

 

[Unlucky41]

Lady - your amh is better than mine and you definitely stim better than I do. Just to give you some hope I only got two eggs in my fifth IVF cycle which lead to my bub inside me in at the moment !!! She is coming out tomorrow hence extremely exited and ofcourse very scare. Hope she pass every test!!!
If you are still keen with trying with your own eggs I think you still have a good chance being so young just need to get the right protocol and some luck!!!

AQ -How are you feeling now ? I agree you need to distract yourself with some pampering during this time. I agree that dh are the worst comforters at times. They just don't know what to say!!

Ash all the best to 1the transfer hope to hear our good news once I come back from hospital!!

AFM the nurse called and said my operation is tomorrow 2p.m. hence no eating from 8 a.m. how am I going to distract myself all morning!! Excited and thankful. Thanks for all the support ladies over the year!! Wouldn't be the same without this thread!!!

 

[bubumaci]

..ooohhh... this time tomorrow you will have your LO ... I am so excited for you! If you can, try to sleep as long as possible, to extend the morning Then spend time making sure you have everything you need for the hospital. Wander around the house, taking it in - it is the last time it will look and smell the way it is for a long time ... and spend and cherish your last moments with DH as a twosome
You probably will need to be at the hospital at least an hour beforehand, right?
Thinking of you, crossing fingers for you and : SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!!
xxxx

 

[LadyLovenox]

Bubumaci and Unlucky...Thank you both so much for the positive words and encouragement!! Bubumaci...I agree...I totally wish my RE would take the reigns and tell me what's best! I feel like she will suggest this or that, but it's up to me, and I always beat myself up when it fails, like I should have made different decisions. I am on coq10 right now, (600mg as well), I have never heard of reversatrol (sp?), but I will definitely look into it! I am on 75 mg DHEA daily, which I definitely feel helped our last cycle, so I am staying on it. It makes me super greasy (we are talking 2 showers a day, kind of greasy), and I notice more hair in the shower drain but nothing too dramatic. The embryoscope is something I've never heard of, but will DEFINITELY bring up. After googling this, it seems like it could be a huge help. I am so so so happy for your success, and I'm sure you're just ready to hold that little baby in your arms and give a huge sigh of relief that your journey with infertility is over!!
Unlucky...Thanks so much! I'm sooo glad to hear you had success, with low numbers like mine!! I am so encouraged to hear that with only two eggs, you still got pregnant!! It really does just take one golden egg!! You have to be over the moon right now!!

 

[africaqueen]

Jo- OMG D day is almost here!! i am so excited for you and would love to see a pic of your miracle if you are able to share with us Wishing you lots of luck and shall be thinking of you tomorrow! x

Ash- Is ET tomorrow?? x

Hi to Andrea, Clare, MrsE and all the gang x

AFM- I am feeling a lot calmer today. I have had a weekend off my healthy life plan an enjoyed maccies an pizza an choc! back on the tons of fruit an veg tomorrow tho to keep my eggies healthy! x

Btw ladies, did u hear somewhere that organic milk is best during stimming as normal milk contains hormones or have i imagined it?! lol xxx

 

[bubumaci]

Puh, Sarah, I wouldn't know about milk. I don't drink it full stop (have always hated milk and am somewhat lactose intolerant), so I always have Soja Drink or something similar ... But I hadn't heard that about milk before ...

 

[africaqueen]

Thanks Andrea. I may of imagined it anyway! lol xxx

 

[bubumaci]

I'm about to trundle off to bed - but I wanted to wish you, Jo all the best for your C-Sec (it's morning there), lots of luck, a wonderful meeting with your LO and I look forward to hearing from you and seeing some photos once you're up to it

Ash good luck for your transfer

 

[ashknowsbest]

unlucky - I hope everything went smoothly for you today! Am thinking about you and your family. Can't wait to see pictures when you get home

AQ - Yes transfer is tomorrow. I go in between 1 and 1:30 and the transfer is at 2. I'm looking forward to the transfer but not the drive up to NYC. I went to NYC today for bloodwork u/s and we hit a ton of traffic on the way home .... it was awful! I was surprised too because it's normally not that bad on Sunday. I was also exhausted because I couldn't get to sleep until midnight and then I had to be up by 4:15 am to leave by 5 to be there on time for my 7am monitoring. Crazy crazy day! And as far as milk goes, I always drink organic milk because regardless of if I'm stimming or not for IVF I do not want the hormones that they give the cows to be in my system. But I think it's just a personal choice, not really sure if it really matters for the stimming procress.

bubu - thanks! Will keep you girls updated.

 

[dovkav123]

Hi ladies,
It's is such an amzing thread, I had chills reading it this morning. You are so wonderful and supportive!

ashknowsbest, hope and pray you'll have a smooth transfer today!

Unlucky, you are the luckiest mummy in the world by now. Sending you blessings to you and your family!

africaqueen, If I were you, I would drink only organic milk. I advice everybody: old or young to consume only organic milk products. It suppose to be free of pesticides, antibiotics, hormones. All these nasty stuff may cause anitbiotic resistance, inflammation, autoimmune problems and even cancer. I don't know how honest the companies are in these days but I hope they do their best to reduce the amounts of chemicals.
I beleave that whole milk is better for IVF than a low fat milk. Drink lots of filtered water too!
Wishing you all the best for your journey!

 

[Sandy83]

Ash good luck for transfer today got everything crossed for you

Unlucky good luck for your c section can't wait to see photo's xx

 

[Peachy1584]

Ash best of luck today! So excited for you but totally don't envy that tww : ). Everything crossed this is it for you!

Unlucky you are so lucky! Hope everything goes perfectly for you and baby but I know it will! So jealous!

AQ when you start digging into all that stuff it's a mess. Really you have to be a vegetarian and eat only organic fruits and veggies because it's in the meat you consume as well. I'm not a huge meat eater but I'm bad on the processed foods. I didn't get like this on carrot sticks : ). So I looked at the grocery yesterday just to see and a pound of 93% lean ground beef was $6.99. No wonder I don't buy organic I couldn't afford it : ) . Anyhow I think the bottom line is go ahead and switch the milk if you'd like but I think you're perfectly fine. I've been eating/drinking the crap for years and I'm older than you : ) . This was the only time we transferred on day 3 and the only time we did assisted hatching and the endo scratch. Maybe they helped and maybe not. I think sometimes it's just getting lucky and getting the right one. When I see how much weight you've lost on the ticker it's amazing! This is the heaviest I've ever been during a cycle. This whole process has stressed me out and I've gained weight. Don't beat yourself up over every little thing. You know form the weight loss and the supplements and trying to be positive you've done everything you can on your part. I think you know that too

 

[ashknowsbest]

Transfer went great. Both frozen embryos thawed well and we transferred both. They were graded 4BB and 3BB. Hoping that's good enough to get us pregnant! Official test date is Sept 3rd. I will probably test on the 2nd but not sooner than that. I've attached a picture for you girls to see if you're interested! I love pictures!