tempted to talk to FOB....I'm gonna cry!

[nightkd]

It's nice that he's made some effort and obviously has some pride to have added the pic to his FB photos. I definitely wouldn't have guessed he was almost 30 either

xx

Glad I'm not the only one! hahaha

Also, nightkd, WHEN THE HELL DID YOU GET SO FAR ALONG?? I swear, you were hanging out with us WTTers just last week!

Sorry. Off topic but I caught sight of te ticker and nearly crapped myself! lol

Lol! I'm honestly not sure On the one hand it feels like it's dragged on for ages, because I just want to meet Bean! On the other...OMG! I'm in 3rd tri!!

xx

 

[trashit]

bloooming hell that has gone fast!!!!! she'll be here before you know it!#


oh jesus if only we could all be lesbians and use sperm doners x

 

[aiimee12345]

lol yep ellie sperm donors sound good lol!
x

 

[ohmisslizzie]

By the choices that you have made so far - I think you will do whats right for you and your baby, personally as long as hes drugging- I would say no way- and I know it seems all men are assholes- I had my share of them- but there are a few that are not- and I am positive you will find a man who loves you for you and Jude as his own, congrats on your sweet baby boy!!xx

Just wanted to say- I do not know how old you are but what you did was sooo mature- you have taken the high road and nothing but respect for that, I have followed some of your story and just wanted to add that you are a beautiful, amazing woman and now mother to the cutest baby ever!! xx

you almost sent me into tears with this. thankyou soo much that's a really lovely thing to say
I have tried my best, i just wanted what was best for Jude and i knew that his daddy wasn't.. Its a confusing situation cos he did run off, but at the same time i did tell him he wasn't responsible or mature enough to be a part of Jude's life but i did that after he ran off may i add in. He loves drugs too much and not only that but you WOULD think he was the 17 year old and i was the 28 year old, its actually ridiculous.. At that age he shouldn't have acted as he did..
Grr i dont know why i suddenly have sympathy for him! But i guess i've ran out of angry energy now and i keep looking at Jude and imagining how it would have been to bring him into a complete family..
Not that i want him back, hell no, he always embarrassed me. He wouldn't let me throw away his brown cords, and he played with trains still says it all really doesnt it?! xx

 

[cabaretmum2b]

Dear me, he's nearly 30 and still acts like that??? Just goes to show that men stop maturing when they're around 15...then they just get grumpier. There are a few that are lovely though, and from how you are, I'm sure Jude will turn out to be one of the nice ones when he grows up

 

[PleaseBaby]

I'm amazed at how mature you have managed to be through all of the shit he's put you through! At the end of the day you have the most beautiful son ever and nothing is going to change that. I can actually understand you sympathising with him because without him you wouldn't have Jude but you have let him know your son arrived into the world safely and the balls now in his court. I'm absolutely certain that you will make the best decision for Jude and that you will be the best mother in the world, with or without his fathers help, he will miss out on nothing just because he doesn't have a father. I really hope you realise how proud you should be of yourself x

 

[Jadelm]

Just goes to show that men stop maturing when they're around 15...then they just get grumpier.

That is SO true

 

[trashit]

that is SO true

thanks everybody

I'm just gonna be a wimp and dwell loooooooooser!

You know, i actually cried today cos i have to change docs as i now live out of the catchment area and i've been with them doctors all my life pathetic or what?!

 

[aiimee12345]

aww hun ur hormonal arent u?
i dont like my doctors anyway so dont think id be too upset if i had to move!
but do get upset over silly things sumtyms dont we lol!

xx

 

[Abigailly]

I've not read the whole thread, only up until the point where you said about him not been there for the last 2 months of your pregnancy.
Obviously I don't know your whole situation. Honestly he sounds like a prick. But I'm going to tell you my story anyway.
My OH wasn't there for a lot of my pregnancy, most anyway. The last few weeks he was brilliant in all fairness, but the minute he met Niamh he was head over heels and is the best Dad she could ask for.

I know you don't want to be with him, but perhaps he can, and will, man up and be a dad for your son?

On the other had he could be some useless idiot who doesn't know the Earth from the Moon.

And on the note of hormones, I cried today, at the fact I ripped my best jeans. It seemed like the worst thing that cold happen. EVER!

 

[trashit]

In a perfect world he wouldn't be such a goon and we could all be together as a family, but its not a perfect world and he IS a big fat goon. He really is someone to be ashamed of. Drugs are HIS LIFE, there's barely a sentence where he doesn't mention them. We had quite a topsy turvy relationship... We moved in together after the first date and then within a few months i was pregnant so it was all quite quick and crazy and obviously being pregnant there was the hormones and for the first few weeks i kept dumping him and getting back with him, well you all know how it is lol. Then suddenly when i was 30 weeks gone "he had found a job 2 hours away and it payed really well and i was gonna come join him with the baby when i'd got on my feet" But he left on the understanding he would keep in contact and always have his phone on in case anything happened. He left, the job didn't exist, he took all my furniture and he left the house in a state, oh and he didn't contact even though he had many ways of being able to... and left no way for me to contact him. So it was clear that he'd got scared and done a runner....
So i messaged him to let him know that i didn't think he was responsible enough to look after my son and it was in my sons best interests that he didn't think he could just swan back on in when he felt like it and he simply told me in a nutshell to "fuck off"

And i haven't heard from him since. Well until I contacted him to let him know about Jude...

I shouldn't have sympathy for him because he is an absolute cockface, really i think its hormones. But also the fact i just don't have the energy to be angry anymore *sighs* Its all such a confusing mess... x

 

[aiimee12345]

:O what a fuckin idiot!! omg... ur the one trying babe and he hasnt!!
i cant believe he left u like that! i new he left but didnt no he left like that!! WTF is wrong with him!!!

jude and u are better off without him .. he will probally just let jude down anyway!!
but hun if u want to try and let him be involved everyone would understand ur a great mommy ! x

 

[trashit]

thankyou
It made me laugh that he changed his "looking for" on facebook to a relationship the minute we split up, i was like yeah the chances of you pulling are one in a hundred trazillion (i was his first girlfriend AT 28 YEARS OLD) x

 

[aiimee12345]

lol really?!?!?
what a loser lol!!

haha ellie u make me giggle
u & Jude deserve better x

 

[trashit]

yeah and he boned his step mum, i wouldn't have minded if she was sexy but she was in her fifties and still thought she was a 20 year old hippy she was also the size of a boat... I'm gagging to tell his dad, he still has no idea

Sorry i shouldn't be exposing FOB's dirty laundry on here, but it does make me giggle.

Thankyou sugar x

 

[AyaChan]

ive just been reading this since it started.

but i have to say, OMG @ the stepmum thing


Jude don't need him anyways, we all know that, your more than enough for the little(big) man

xx

 

[Mellie1988]

Glad he replied with a 'nice' message hun, tbh though that message proves that he isn't worth it otherwise he would of said like can he meet him etc....I dunno? He sounds like a looooser, and from the story above about how he left you, I agree with all the other girls in that you and Jude are most definitely better off with out him!

Hope you got that bit of closure that you needed?

x

 

[trashit]

yeah it has given me closure, he didn't respond to the other pictures i sent so i just closed it off by saying that i'm sorry it didnt work out too and i made a joke about me being back to "normal" now and not the crazy pregnant lady anymore lol.
I just said "you know where i am"
Its not like if he did turn up i'd turn him away or anything, i would have done 2 months ago, i'd have happily punched him off the doorstep But i would let him see Jude, its not fair me turning him away but i'm not going to beg and plead him to come see him, its his decision in the end.
I keep invisioning him turning up. I crazily keep thinking that every car door i hear slam outside is him lol. I think i'm spending too much time inside! xx

 

[Jadelm]

I think you've done the absolute most unselfish thing for Jude and given FOB a fantastic oppurtunity which quite frankly, after reading how he left you, he didn't deserve. I couldn't have done it to be honest, I would be too pissed off, but the fact you have been so mature for Jude is just amazing hun you are gonna be THE BEST mum and Jude is as lucky to have you as you are to have him xxx

 

[trashit]

aww thankyou everyone on here is SO lovely, i really dont know where i'd be without this site! xx