The 'chit chat' thread

[dancareoi]

Manda, so,sorry to hear the position to are in, hopefully you will find the support you need to make the right decision for your and your family.

There is no wrong or right here, you have to do what you feel is best and remember, if you can, everything happens for a reason. That won't be much of a comfort at the moment, but hopefully one day it will all become clear.

Sending lots of love your way during this difficult time.

 

[Miss Mitch]

Hello,

I don't know if any of you still come here - i'm back after a 3 year 'break' from anything baby related - would be lovely to hear from you all, updates etc.

If anyone replies, i'll be happy to give you an update on me xx

 

[dancareoi]

Hi, I'm still around, but not as often as I used to.

I now have 4 children, my youngest was 2 in September. At the grand old age of 44 my baby making days (sadly) are now behind me.

How are things going with you!

 

[Miss Mitch]

Hi, I'm still around, but not as often as I used to.

I now have 4 children, my youngest was 2 in September. At the grand old age of 44 my baby making days (sadly) are now behind me.

How are things going with you!

Hello! How are you? It's been a while! Ah how lovely, another little one. Would you have more if you could?
I'm really good, in a much better place than when I left thankfully. I split up with my ex - which is what I should have done years before. I've been with my partner now for 3 years, we have just bought our first home, and are about to ttc, which as you can imagine has left me excited and petrified! Xx

 

[dancareoi]

Sounds exciting. Glad you are in a better place now. You are still young and have a very exciting journey ahead. Lots of luck and baby dust coming your way.

Make sure you keep me posted.

I wish I could be TTC again. I'd do it again tomorrow if I could, but at my age now I think it would just bring more sadness, heartache and worry. Also DH had the 'snip' so its not likely to happen anyway!!!!!

 

[Andypanda6570]

I am still around too..I didn't try again after Ava, not sure why..Now I am 45..It will be 5 yrs she is gone in March..I cannot believe it has went that fast.. How is everyone doing? XOXOOX

 

[Miss Mitch]

Sounds exciting. Glad you are in a better place now. You are still young and have a very exciting journey ahead. Lots of luck and baby dust coming your way.

Make sure you keep me posted.

I wish I could be TTC again. I'd do it again tomorrow if I could, but at my age now I think it would just bring more sadness, heartache and worry. Also DH had the 'snip' so its not likely to happen anyway!!!!!

Thank you, I definitely feel more ready now - but this 'ache' for a child has been driving me crazy since Olivia, which is 4 years ago on 18th Jan. I can't believe it has gone that quick. Just recently though, the want has actually made me cry - its actually like a dull ache in your soul. I probably sound mental (and probably am) But I am looking forward to hopefully getting a little one out of it this time.

Ah bless you, I suppose that ache doesn't go away does it - its a womans maternal instinct! xx

I am still around too..I didn't try again after Ava, not sure why..Now I am 45..It will be 5 yrs she is gone in March..I cannot believe it has went that fast.. How is everyone doing? XOXOOX

Hello! How lovely to hear from you I am good thank you, about to start the ttc journey again. Did you have any other children? I'm sorry, i'm not able to recall xx

 

[MissingEllie]

Hi all,
New to the thread and site.

5 weeks ago I lost my daughter Elizabeth.
It was a slightly difficult pregnancy, nothing too serious just was stressful.
Cystic fibrosis test came back positive, but my husband didnt carry the gene so we were fine.
Had early onset gestational diabetes so that was fun..
Downsyndrome test came back as screen positive with 1/30 chance.

On 12/22 we had the CVS done. Everything seemed fine.

a few weeks later I started to notice a little extra wetness but read that thats a normal symptom of second trimesters.

on 1/22 I got really sick. Fevers and uncontrollable shivering. I couldnt drink water without throwing up. I was very dehydrated.
There was a nasty flu going around and I assumed I had gotten it.
I treated to myself as if i would any flu at home.
On 1/24 after a few days of unbreakable fevers I went in to see a doctor.
She snarked at me and tested me for the flu and gave me fluids in her office. The flu test came back negative and she emailed that evening to tell me it wasnt the flu. - but thats all.

on 1/27 at 5 am i began to have contractions. I knew what they felt like vrs. braxton hicks because I had already delivered one healthy child.

I stood up and my water broke.

I had my husband take me in to the doctor to confirm that I was in labor.
That evening at 5:30 pm we lost Elizabeth. She had kept fighting all the way up until the delivery and passed away as she was coming into the world. I was 20 weeks.

Its now been about 5 weeks and I am lost.
Everyone treats me like i should be better by now but I am so deeply broken.
We had been planning Elizabeth for over a year and when we conceived we were so thrilled.
Some days I am fine and happy and motivated to not let her life be in vain. I work hard eat well and pay extra attention to my son.
Some days i tear up in quiet times but make it through the days okay..
Some days I am so angry, so mad at myself, my doctors, my friends who say the wrong thing... ANYONE WHO SAYS " OH I HAD A MISSCARRAIGE ONCE TOO"
no no no no, there is such a huge difference in a misscarriage and a late term miss carriage or second trimester loss. Or at least thats what I am fixating on..
Other days I drink a bottle of wine and cry my eyes out. - like last night.


Just hoping to have a place to let some of this go...
Maybe come across something that will help..

 

[StillPraying]

.

 

[StillPraying]

Hi all,
New to the thread and site.

5 weeks ago I lost my daughter Elizabeth.
It was a slightly difficult pregnancy, nothing too serious just was stressful.
Cystic fibrosis test came back positive, but my husband didnt carry the gene so we were fine.
Had early onset gestational diabetes so that was fun..
Downsyndrome test came back as screen positive with 1/30 chance.

On 12/22 we had the CVS done. Everything seemed fine.

a few weeks later I started to notice a little extra wetness but read that thats a normal symptom of second trimesters.

on 1/22 I got really sick. Fevers and uncontrollable shivering. I couldnt drink water without throwing up. I was very dehydrated.
There was a nasty flu going around and I assumed I had gotten it.
I treated to myself as if i would any flu at home.
On 1/24 after a few days of unbreakable fevers I went in to see a doctor.
She snarked at me and tested me for the flu and gave me fluids in her office. The flu test came back negative and she emailed that evening to tell me it wasnt the flu. - but thats all.

on 1/27 at 5 am i began to have contractions. I knew what they felt like vrs. braxton hicks because I had already delivered one healthy child.

I stood up and my water broke.

I had my husband take me in to the doctor to confirm that I was in labor.
That evening at 5:30 pm we lost Elizabeth. She had kept fighting all the way up until the delivery and passed away as she was coming into the world. I was 20 weeks.

Its now been about 5 weeks and I am lost.
Everyone treats me like i should be better by now but I am so deeply broken.
We had been planning Elizabeth for over a year and when we conceived we were so thrilled.
Some days I am fine and happy and motivated to not let her life be in vain. I work hard eat well and pay extra attention to my son.
Some days i tear up in quiet times but make it through the days okay..
Some days I am so angry, so mad at myself, my doctors, my friends who say the wrong thing... ANYONE WHO SAYS " OH I HAD A MISSCARRAIGE ONCE TOO"
no no no no, there is such a huge difference in a misscarriage and a late term miss carriage or second trimester loss. Or at least thats what I am fixating on..
Other days I drink a bottle of wine and cry my eyes out. - like last night.


Just hoping to have a place to let some of this go...
Maybe come across something that will help..

I'm so sorry. I wish I had the words to help you, to take away the pain. But the truth is only time can do that, and taking one day at a time. It's so hard when everyone else moves on and assumes you should too. Don't worry about everyone else. You deserve to grieve, and take all of the time you need

 

[xMissxZoiex]

Hey everyone, I hope this thread picks up again.

I lost my first son Leo to IC in 2014, I had my rainbow Wyatt in 2015 and lost my twin boys Owen & Milo to IC & failed TVC 8 weeks ago.

I hope to get to know other Angel mummies xxxxx

 

[ReadynWaiting]

So sorry for your losses. Having had 8 miscarriages and then losing my son Zander at 17 weeks there is definitely a difference. My miscarriages were all very upsetting and life changing but delivering my son and holding his perfect little body was complete devastation. I work daily on moving through this pain so I can get to a place where I'm not crippled by my pain.
I have some form of therapy weekly (reiki, grief counselling, shaman, reflexology, chiro) that has helped me move through it all. I am around if anyone needs to talk, vent, scream, cry. Be gentle with yourself!

 

[Myshelsong]

Hi ladies, so very sorry for your losses.
We lost our son at around 22 weeks in September. It has been so difficult dealing with it, especially as he was a five year infertility miracle thanks to IVF. We had another early loss in January after a FET and I am mid FET cycle right now.

Big hugs

 

[ReadynWaiting]

Myshelsong- I'm so sorry for your losses and the hard path of infertility and ivf. My everything is crossed that this transfer is a positive one.
I was doing much better and then I was smacked with 2 pregnancy announcements from people that really shouldn't have more children. I'm struggling to stay positive and have yet to be able to congratulate them.

 

[Myshelsong]

I am the same way. I struggle to be "happy" for anyone who announces their pregnancy, I find I am bitter and jealous for a few days before I can actually get over it and be .... glad for them. I don't even know if I am ever really happy for them. I have decided I am ok this with. It is completely natural and I am done feeling guilty about my reactions. All that matters is how I show my feelings, I am not being hateful or rude, I put on a braves face and smile where appropriate and cry when I have too ... but I avoid baby showers like the plague.

 

[ReadynWaiting]

I don't feel guilty anymore either. The loss of my son was profound and if people think poorly for how I deal with things that's their problem. I'm just trying to survive.

 

[Myshelsong]

Well I had my FET transfer yesterday, feeling really nervous but trying to stay positive.
Just hoping for some happy positive thoughts sent my way. You never know if it will work...

How are you ladies doing?

 

[ReadynWaiting]

I have everything crossed for you! It's so exciting and terrifying all wrapped together. I really hope this is your rainbow in the works.
Dh and I talked about ttc again and we both seem to be ready. I say that lightly because it actually scares the shit out of me. I'm trying not to feel resentful that I have to go through this again. On the other hand I'm feeling very positive about things working out. It's almost like I have a split personality lol.

 

[xMissxZoiex]

Fingers crossed Myshelsong!!, Good luck

I'm still waiting on my TAC surgery, I'm so nervous about getting it done but I know it needs to be done to have my rainbow!, We are kind of NTNP but not really if that makes any sense at all the surgery can be done during pregnancy but that's even scarier than just having surgery. I don't know how I feel about it all, I'm trying to just go with the flow and letting nature take its cause until then.

 

[ReadynWaiting]

Misszoie-what is the surgery for?