The Loss of Breastfeeding - Guilt, Grief & Support Thread

[Leopard]

Lavera you are being rather callous.

 

[queenlavera]

That thread you posted about women not really trying to bf was callous, please don't even start.

 

[Leopard]

I will start because unlike you i know how to apologise when I make a mistake; you're just in here to start shit.

Don't want something to start? Then don't start it.

 

[Snugggs]

I happen to fully agree with queen lavera. most comments on here are not about bf v ff, bottom line is, that is how the bf section on here makes us feel.

I was one of the so called wrongly informed and bf for the first 3 weeks with top up. I for one think that happened to be the correct advise for me.

I posted 1 topic on bf asking for help with thrush and stepping over to try bf full time. all the answers read the same.... One legged mountain climbers as vintage calls them. I didn't need telling to suffer bleeding nipples and I wasn't trying any where near as hard as the poster did, I needed support!
I even got paired up with a bf champion, who after the first message didn't bother to message back!

I think you also have to remember summer that queens comments weren't pointing to any one person, it was an opinion of 1 forum section.... Eand I support that opinion

X

 

[MonstHer]

Leopard, you are a huge hypocrite. That thread you made a while back was more than cruel. I view you completely differently now.
Lucky for you the ladies in here are so forgiving.

Lavera is right. Women don't want to hear that stuff.

 

[queenlavera]

Thanks Snuggs, my initial comment was just my frustration in general, anyway I am not going to study the nonsense.

 

[dragonhawk]

ok, back to the original point... thank you for creating this post. after trying to bf for 3 weeks, spending every feed time in tears having been told by my midwife that i HAD to breast feed, i was finally seen by a different midwife who could see how awful i had been made to feel by the medical profession, in being effectively forced to breastfeed, when i could see that my newborn son was not getting enough nutrients, that she had the sense to not look into the latch, as that wasn't a problem but rather to reassure me that i was a good mother as i knew there was a problem and could see that he was not getting what he needed.

there was no issue with tongue tie, which nearly every breastfeeding 'specialist' kept telling me. the problem was actually because my son wanted to 'bite' my nipples and his sucking action was so strong that my nipples would bleed and would be completely mis-shapen.

therefore no one was at fault, but i was made to feel like a failure to my son and my husband because i wasn't able to breastfeed. believe me, i was DESPERATE to bf. however, to this day, although we are essentially ff, whenever i can manage to get anything out, i express what i can to supplement my son's diet. the only reason i express when i can, is because i am still not 100% to terms with the need to ff. that is the fault of the medical profession, all except that one midwife that could see the state that we were in.

thank you for the initial post.

 

[Wobbles]

I think some of the ladies have a right to feel more than offended about A LOT of comments that have been expressed using 'opinions' as a backup BUT past negative threads are best left behind where they were ... let's not make a perfectly good supportive discussion into something else.

It was requested for this thread to be made a sticky which I granted however if this does turn into a war I will un-stick and consider closing.

In the nicest way I do think there are a lot of ladies on here that need to reconsider using the formula feeding section when they have made it more than obvious of their disapproval. It isn't a place to push options/opinion on breastfeeding at all and I've give the same advise vice versa before anyone starts!

 

[Snugggs]

Dragon, I'm glad that one midwife helped you. I too was desperate to bf.... But I do think "what's the point" if it's going to be detrimental to your relationship with lo. I've read of so many women on here who day they hated their lo during feed, or they dreaded feed, or they cried during feed!... That to me is not healthy, and an unhealthy mind isn't worth all the booby milk in the world.

I don't think there is anything wrong with you expressing . My hv told me (when I was coming to terms with not bfing) that if I wanted to give him the odd feed, then do it if it kept my sanity. It was almost like having a guilty please.... But it did help me through that tough week or two

X

 

[BabyBoo36]

Come on ladies, please lets not let this thread be locked. It's a source of support for a lot of us x

 

[MrsPOP]

Please don't let this thread get locked PLEASE.

I would respond further but I'm in hospital with my very sick mother.

 

[Lil_Pixie]

mrspop x

 

[Leopard]

hope everything is alright.

 

[summer rain]

 

[BabyBoo36]

Mrs Pop xx

 

[Karlie06]

Mrs Pop xx

 

[MrsPOP]

They think she has a blood clot on her lung (pulmonary embolism) I've come home to get her some stuff pretty shit for me and my fam at the moment. Puts things into perspective.

 

[jojo2012]

Thats awful. Hope everything works out and she's ok. xxoo

 

[buddyIV]

MrsPOP... I'll be thinking of you and hoping that all is well x

 

[Snugggs]

Oh mrspop ... Wishing your mom a speedy recovery and sending plenty of strong positive vibes your way.....

...and you're so right, it certainly does put things into perspective xxx