The Loss of Breastfeeding - Guilt, Grief & Support Thread

[andella95]

Well I now have almost no milk, I cannot even get a proper drop out.

I'm sorry...I know how important it is to you.

 

[Leopard]

Well I now have almost no milk, I cannot even get a proper drop out.

I'm sorry...I know how important it is to you.

Yeah...
It hasn't sunken in yet, but I'm in a dark skinned community now and almost all of them manage to breastfeed with no problems and it tears me up; it's not fair they should be able to do it and I cannot.(majority of them are drunken derelicts).
We are TTC now though, so next kid I'll be giving it all.

 

[vintage67]

Andella, I like that picture, but have seen some pretty offensive stuff on the alpha parent site. It kind of reminds me of someone who would.... you know, run formula down as a not even second place option but probably fourth and then bat eyelashes and say but goodness me! I never said the mom
was bad!

I just want to educate! HA!

 

[Eala]

Alpha Parent can bite me. She posted a pick recently where a baby's head was photoshopped into an obese woman's body, then labelled bits to point out the "dangers" of formula. The woman is deranged. Bottle babies did a ff meme like that, will try and post it when not on my phone.

 

[vintage67]

I like that picture though.

There isn't a place on the internet as special as this thread!

 

[andella95]

Okay, I didn't know all that, just found the picture by googling. hm. sorry about that. but i like the picture!

 

[andella95]

I'm in a good state of mind right now...looking at the pro-breastfeeding/anti-formula propaganda and seeing it for what it truly is- biased, incomplete, incorrect and primarily a way to make certain parents feel better about their choices than other parents. There is no better way to feel better about yourself than to go all over the internet and criticize others, is there?

But I feel so bad now, for unknowningly unleashing that hate link upon this thread! Please, forgive me!

 

[queenlavera]

It really amazes me that some moms have to go through such great lengths to put other moms down to make themselves feel better. I really feel like if you are doing the right thing for your child, you shouldn't have any desire to beat someone else up for their parenting choices.

 

[kecie]

This post is really amazing. I was looking forward to BF throughout my whole pregnancy, then my son was born with tongue tie and hasn't been able to BF since having it fixed. It's not fair that other people can put us down and judge us, our babies are getting fed and that's what they need!

 

[MrsPOP]

Yeah Alpha Parent can suck balls as far as I'm concerned. I'm sick of hypocritical mums who profess to give a toss about parents but then once they start posting offensive crap and expect us to just sit there and take it ...

 

[Kage76]

OMG i have never heard of alpha parent- i've just read some of her posts and they have made me sick to my stomach. I pray i never meet her or anyone like her in my life- i wonder what the air is like in that ivory tower of hers.

 

[MrsPOP]

Yeah I started reading Alpha parent, but I promptly subscribed after one pontificating post too many.

 

[booflebump]

Ladies - while this is primarily a wonderful support thread, it has been brought to our attention a few times over the past 24 hours

I'll remind you that I've already asked for incidents that occurred on FB not to be mentioned again on this thread - this includes references to the other member involved. There will be no further warnings regarding this issue.

Yeah...
It hasn't sunken in yet, but I'm in a dark skinned community now and almost all of them manage to breastfeed with no problems and it tears me up; it's not fair they should be able to do it and I cannot.(majority of them are drunken derelicts).

Sweeping generalisations regarding a community or particular race are not permitted on the forum, and the above could be construed (and has been by other members) as racist.

Antisocial, discriminatory or offensive messages (intended or otherwise) aimed at the community at large, certain demographics (including parenting styles) or specific members, are not permitted

I don't really want to have to come in here and comment again as it is a great source of support, but please be mindful of what you are posting and how it can be read by others.

 

[Kage76]

i don't even know who the other member involved is- Mrs pop has been very careful not to mention names or user names - so if I have inadvertently mentioned them I apologise. I still have no clue who it is.

 

[Kage76]

This post is really amazing. I was looking forward to BF throughout my whole pregnancy, then my son was born with tongue tie and hasn't been able to BF since having it fixed. It's not fair that other people can put us down and judge us, our babies are getting fed and that's what they need!

hey Kecie- welcome- I think that's what really bites about formula guilt- I spent so much time fantasising about breast feeding that when the reality hit- i had to really learn to adjust quickly. I laugh now but i even looked into donating my excess breast milk I was that sure i was going to BF.

 

[MrsPOP]

Boofle whilst I understand your position I don't think I have done anything wrong. I've not mentioned her name. Trust me, I'd love to do consisering im getting slagged off left right and centre on BnB but I'm mature enough not to.

 

[MrsPOP]

And further more it's really ridiculous this thread keeps getting reported. It's like people don't want us to be able to deal with this or something?

 

[booflebump]

Boofle whilst I understand your position I don't think I have done anything wrong. I've not mentioned her name. Trust me, I'd love to do consisering im getting slagged off left right and centre on BnB but I'm mature enough not to.

You have made a few references, and most recently in your post about the Alpha Parent, said it was recommended to you by the 'bf is love' lady. Regardless of the fact no names are mentioned, it's still referring to a particular member and an argument that occurred off BnB, and that's where it should stay. If there is more to say on the matter, or resolutions to be made, then please keep it to FB

And further more it's really ridiculous this thread keeps getting reported. It's like people don't want us to be able to deal with this or something?

The thread wasn't reported for this particular reason, but a number of other comments. I don't think it has anything to do with people not wanting you to deal with things, but just because this is a support group, doesn't mean that forum rules don't apply and all reports are looked in to

 

[MrsPOP]

Of course Boofle and I apologise if it seems like I've caused trouble. I'm just upset as you can imagine, it's important to me that the issue of Bf "failure" isn't kept like a dirty secret. I have never intended to transcend any forum rules.

Trust me, I'm dealing with FB help centre over the matter it's hard because this situation upset me so much with regards to my own Bf failure and I needed support.

Please highlight any further comments I have made and I am happy to edit.

 

[Lady_Bee]

Gaaah. Just when I thought I was beginning to feel ok about this... I went to my local Children's Centre and there is a lovely lady there who tried to help me with the bf earlier on, and she remembered me and asked me how the feeding was going and whether I was still trying to bf and I just burst into tears Grr why is so hard to get over it and move on??? It seems silly - it's just food at the end of the day...