The possibility of Afghanistan....

[PipSqueaker]

Hey everyone, I really need a panic moment, and don't know where else to turn.

You see, my husband is in the National Guard and we got word that he might be deploying to Afghanistan in January. We should know for sure on Monday, but the wait is really taking its toll on me. I'm scared to death of being pregnant and taking care of our first newborn without him, but I have to put on a strong face so that he won't worry about me as much.

I came into the relationship knowing that he would deploy at some point in time, but when his earlier scheduled deployment was pushed back until next October, I abandoned the idea of him going at all because he wanted to find a new job (his current one requires him to be in the Guard) so that he could get out of the military for good.

I know I signed up for this when I married him, but that doesn't change the fact that it's been sprung on us so quickly, and that circumstances are less than ideal. Thank you for reading. Any tips for coping with separation would be greatly appreciated.

 

[bonidee]

do you live near family? mine is deploying like less than a month before my due date and i live in california but my whole family lives in georgia so i'm going to move back there.

you and i are very close to each other in progression, have you asked his command if he can get his R&R around your due date?

 

[PipSqueaker]

I do have family pretty close by, (an hour in any direction) and I even have a cousin that will come stay with me when/if DH deploys, so I do have a strong support system.

From what I've heard he may not get an R&R. It has something to do with the fact that, even though he'll be gone for a full year, only 8 months of it will be in Afghanistan (that they predict.) We're keeping our fingers crossed, but it doesn't look promising.

 

[bonidee]

i'm sorry hon, but we knew this is what we signed up for. mine will only be gone for 6 months, thank God but from what it's looking like, he will probably miss the birth. :/

hang in there, i'm sure if you try to work with them they will manage to do something to help you guys out since you know so far ahead.

 

[TNW]

He should still get an R&R... My DF is also national guard. He was suppose to deploy but dates have changed so we are wait and see. But, from what he has said he will have an R&R even though he will only be in country 8 months...

 

[threemakefive]

Good news is my brother in law was set to deploy there today and turns out they didn't send him said they were done sending to iraq and afghan....or so they say..so instead he went to kuwait,....which is better than the others i guess...he is in nat. guard as well!

 

[PipSqueaker]

I know that no more troops are going to Iraq, but as far as I've heard, Afghanistan is still on the table until Jan 2014.

If he does get an R&R, I know in the past his chain of command has been really understanding about scheduling it over due dates. Fingers crossed, and thank you, everyone for the support.

 

[PipSqueaker]

It's official, he got his mobilization order today. I think now that I know for sure it'll be easier to relearn how to cope with the idea.

Thank you all.

 

[JessPape]

Hey, just read, i wish you all the best when he is away, it'll be hard but I bet your rock it

 

[Iamblessed]

You and your dh will definently be in my thoughts and prayers I wish you didn't have to go through this as its a sensitive time but as the pp said you will rock it and seem very strong. Bless you both If you ever need to talk I know the situation well as I have an ex that was in the military and had gone away to somolia.

 

[beth_terri]

I really feel for you. My partner had to go to afganistan just before our sons first birthday, and his regiment is due to deploy again september next year- 2 months after baby is due. Im praying that he wont have to go again. I dont know how id cope with him missing the birth though. Although I suppose it will be harder for them to miss it than what it is for us.

Im sure youll manage just fine (its easier when they are away lol you get into a little routine that gets completely interrupted when theyre home!)
xx

 

[MagicalLeigh]

My sil dh was deployed a lot during the first two years of the marriage, even during a pregnancy. You women must be tough! where in Utah are you? I live in Utah county!

 

[PipSqueaker]

I'm in the southern end of Salt Lake County. Not far at all.

Thank you all again for your support. I'm doing much better now that the initial hit has worn off. I was prepared for this situation once, and I can be prepared for it again. Plus, I know exactly where I can come when things get tough.