I am so sorry you had to go through and are still going through all of that. I do not blame you one bit for feeling the way you do. You are a strong woman.
thank you hun.........but Im not strong. Im terrified of having the op for the colostomy bag, and I am told the reversal in 6 months time is hell.....I dont feel strong. I feel sad, in pain and a bit scared! x
thank you hun.........but Im not strong. Im terrified of having the op for the colostomy bag, and I am told the reversal in 6 months time is hell.....I dont feel strong. I feel sad, in pain and a bit scared! x
You have every right to be scared! What you have ALREADY gone through much much more than so many women....You are strong, I don't know you presonally but I can tell you are! You will get through this, and I am sure you have a wonderful support team in life and as well as you do on here. Take care mama, it may be a long road but this too shall pass, brighter days are here to come. xxx
You're amazingly strong.
Dear DH's Family (Aunty, Cousin, MIL, etc) -
Hi.I'm TM's wife. We've been married for almost two years. We have a daughter. We live in our own place and have since we got married. We don't do everything that MIL does, we don't do everything that Aunty does. We have a completely separate life because we are a completely separate family unit.
This means that if you are planning a get-together for the family, it would be a good idea, hell it would just be polite, to give me or DH a call, or drop us an email, if you are including us.
Instead of just inviting Aunty or MIL and assuming they'll let us know.
Yes, even if Aunty says "Oh I'll tell them!"
Because she and MIL are weird and don't tell us till they see us, instead of giving us a call. Which means we are the last people to know.
Also, we don't want to just ride on the coattails of MIL bringing food to contribute, we'd like to bring something too, but how are we supposed to know what to bring if we don't talk to YOU??
The way you've done this, makes me feel like you see us as two kids playing house. Which we are not. And I have no idea how to get you to stop....
i know exactly how you feel!!
Dear DH's Family (Aunty, Cousin, MIL, etc) -
Hi.
This means that if you are planning a get-together for the family, it would be a good idea, hell it would just be polite, to give me or DH a call, or drop us an email, if you are including us.
Instead of just inviting Aunty or MIL and assuming they'll let us know.
Yes, even if Aunty says "Oh I'll tell them!"
Because she and MIL are weird and don't tell us till they see us, instead of giving us a call. Which means we are the last people to know.
Also, we don't want to just ride on the coattails of MIL bringing food to contribute, we'd like to bring something too, but how are we supposed to know what to bring if we don't talk to YOU??
The way you've done this, makes me feel like you see us as two kids playing house. Which we are not. And I have no idea how to get you to stop....
everyone just assumes that we will be there as MIL and FIL have been invited, if they say yes to going they automatically assume we will be going! we dont get told until day before usually as MIL and FIL dont think to tell us, assuming we would of been invited by whoever it is hosting said get together so we only find out when we ring them to check in on them of an evening and they say see you tomoz... we then have to either rush to bake a cake to take (as im always the 1 who takes cake) or if we already have plans we have to ring up whoever is hosting and tell them we wont be coming, then they get all arsey because they have made enough food for everyone and it will go to waste because they thought we would be going because MIL and FIL are coming, i wouldnt mind as much if we had only recently moved out of parental homes, but we have been living together as our own little family for 3 years! you think they would get used to it!
It is a horrible feeling tho when you dont get invited as a seperate family and get invited in your parents/ inlaws invites it is like they think your too young/too immature to be living alone with your own family.
I hate it aswell when you go to said family get togethers and they ask inlaws what we will have to drink! as if were about 4 and cant decide for ourselves! like oh yes, she will have some very weak squash, you best put that in a sippy cup jusst incase... MIL usually gets asked what my DD would like to eat/drink and how she is getting on with her learning etc! its even worse then as its like im not actually there! last time i was so angry about it that i told OH he had to say something, so when they asked MIL how she was getting on with the new baby he said quite loudly to MIL yea mum can you please tell us how OUR eldest daughter is getting on with OUR youngest because we obviously dont know, you know because were only young and too immature to know these kind if things, the same way were too immature to respond to our own invites and too immature to choose our own drinks... we left shortly after and havent been contacted since lol! xxx
I hate everything right now! AND IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! Mom, I don't need to here how I expect things on my birthday. I NEVER EXPECT ANYTHING FROM YOU ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I miss you and love you so so much.Mom and Dad, the sly little digs at DH need to stop. I asked you for all the money for the flights so we could come visit so YOU could meet your new grandson and you only are sending enough for me and Alex. I NEVER ask for anything. My brother has lived with you for YEARS past when he should have moved out and he's never paid rent or anything! I got out, got jobs, graduated college and supported myself. You wouldn't even let me move back in when I left the ex. How could you? At this rate, we won't be able to come.
Dear Auntie Bee, I know you lived 103 years before passing away on Sunday, but I wish you could have met Alex
Sorry your family are being nasty.
You were fine 'til he held you for a demonstration, then you were inconsolable!! I guess you being hungry (again, seriously?) tired and teething didn't help either.. But it means we didn't get to dunk you under the water, when all the other babies got to I hope you enjoy it more next week! Also, please sleep better tonight.. I know you miss being swaddled, but waking up so often is why you're so moody and refusing to nap today (although when you finally DID nap earlier and that stupid cold caller rang the home phone and woke you up.. RAGH! Glad I have him what for 
)
Dear DH's Family (Aunty, Cousin, MIL, etc) -
Hi.
This means that if you are planning a get-together for the family, it would be a good idea, hell it would just be polite, to give me or DH a call, or drop us an email, if you are including us.
Instead of just inviting Aunty or MIL and assuming they'll let us know.
Yes, even if Aunty says "Oh I'll tell them!"
Because she and MIL are weird and don't tell us till they see us, instead of giving us a call. Which means we are the last people to know.
Also, we don't want to just ride on the coattails of MIL bringing food to contribute, we'd like to bring something too, but how are we supposed to know what to bring if we don't talk to YOU??
The way you've done this, makes me feel like you see us as two kids playing house. Which we are not. And I have no idea how to get you to stop....
everyone just assumes that we will be there as MIL and FIL have been invited, if they say yes to going they automatically assume we will be going! we dont get told until day before usually as MIL and FIL dont think to tell us, assuming we would of been invited by whoever it is hosting said get together so we only find out when we ring them to check in on them of an evening and they say see you tomoz... we then have to either rush to bake a cake to take (as im always the 1 who takes cake) or if we already have plans we have to ring up whoever is hosting and tell them we wont be coming, then they get all arsey because they have made enough food for everyone and it will go to waste because they thought we would be going because MIL and FIL are coming, i wouldnt mind as much if we had only recently moved out of parental homes, but we have been living together as our own little family for 3 years! you think they would get used to it!
It is a horrible feeling tho when you dont get invited as a seperate family and get invited in your parents/ inlaws invites it is like they think your too young/too immature to be living alone with your own family.
I hate it aswell when you go to said family get togethers and they ask inlaws what we will have to drink! as if were about 4 and cant decide for ourselves! like oh yes, she will have some very weak squash, you best put that in a sippy cup jusst incase... MIL usually gets asked what my DD would like to eat/drink and how she is getting on with her learning etc! its even worse then as its like im not actually there! last time i was so angry about it that i told OH he had to say something, so when they asked MIL how she was getting on with the new baby he said quite loudly to MIL yea mum can you please tell us how OUR eldest daughter is getting on with OUR youngest because we obviously dont know, you know because were only young and too immature to know these kind if things, the same way were too immature to respond to our own invites and too immature to choose our own drinks... we left shortly after and havent been contacted since lol! xxx
Oh my goodness I'm so glad I'm not the only DIL with this problem. Seriously. I'm lucky, my MIL or someone usually lets us know about the plans more than a day in advance but it still really, really rubs me the wrong way.
We haven't really done a big family get-together since Molly was a brand-new baby, so it'll be... ahem... interesting to see how Thanksgiving goes as far as people asking how Molly is doing, etc...
I'm also expecting lots of questions about our parenting style (co-sleeping, amber necklace, cloth diapering)! So that'll be fun.
) so it wasn't fun for you.. then I got stuck in traffic and it took me 45 minutes to get home and Daniel screamed his head off for 20 of those minutes then fell asleep for 20 more minutes when he needed to be awake to stay on schedule. I had a lot of stuff to do tonight when I got home and had to run around like crazy and had to order pizza for dinner because I had no time to cook.
Dude. This. What is with MILs and not really getting that? I mean, that applies to so much... My MIL is always saying "you're obviously doing things right, she's so happy and healthy and content" but then when we're at their place and I'm doing what I do she tries to get me to do other things!
