Things I cannot say out loud....

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Mother...if you ever DARE slap my sons bum & tell him off again I swear to god I will bodily throw you out of my house & you will NEVER come back. I was calm with you today & frankly I'm shocked I was.

How dare you raise a hand to my 6 month old child! I can't even remember what he was supposed to have done. But thats not the point. He is 6 months old. He has NO understanding of being naughty.

Frankly I'm alarmed at how much my family talk about hitting him. It really really scares me.

Grandad...do not tell my son to shut up. How dare you. My god you annoy me. He is MY baby. MINE! He is not yours, do not judge me. When we go to your house it is not a free excuse to hog him. Did you ever think I like to hold my son when he is happy & laughing?

Don't clap or click at him, he is not a dog.

Ladies...I'm fuming! He's 6 months old & she slapped him. Granted it was the lighted tap ever, but not the point, how dare she pysically punish my child.
 
That's bad! I'd slap her back!

Dh- thnk you for realising what I've been telling you for ages, when you work late and I do flynns bath alone he goes straight to sleep and (usually) sttn, when you are off or on relies and help with his bath an story it takes a couple of hours to settle him and he wakes in the night. Thnk you for realising that, I didn't want to suggest you don't come up when he goes to bed coz I know you like to. Let's see if it helps ok?
 
HV- don't bother to phone me when you are running 25 mins late then I WILL go out! don't expect me to just come back inside- yeah so I didn't actually have anywhere I needed to be I could have gone shopping later but you pissed me off. You have my house number, it would have been polite to call and let me know you were going to be nearly half an hour late. If you are late on monday (when have you ever been on time, any of you) then I will be filing an official complaint and you can all fuck off. I'm sick of LO having to be weighed once a month and I'm not playing a waiting game any more. Late once more and that's it.


OH- grow the fuck up! im sick of running around after you just to keep the peace. you told your friend you dont go to the shop for me because you hate it (you're the one who can drive it takes u 2 mins, its not hard) there for I am no longer ironing your shirts because I hate it. childish, maybe. but tough. you do nothing around here. always using ''I work 6 days'' as an excuse.
complain that you dont get much time with the kids, yet you choose to come home from work and go to your computer to relax. you get up 20 (if that) mins before you leave for work and expect me to have your shirt ironed and your coffee made, complain at me because its not your fault you fell back to sleep- well bloody go to bed earlier then! Im not a fucking alarm clock!
complaining to me about the ironing board being squint when its YOU that is rough with it and has broken it and then you break the iron having a tantrum! FFS get a GRIP because I am not going to stand here like your pathetic mother and baby you like she does your dad.
 
Excuse me no you can not come into my home get the fuck out you crazy tweaker.
I am so so so glad you are being evicted and I will dance happily on August 1st if you get dragged out physically.
 
^ omg! In your home? Id have massively freaked out!
Can't say this out loud coz it's massively tmi but I must've been tired last night coz I tried to apply hemeroid cream into... Um... The wrong hole.... Had a massive giggle fit to myself about it but couldn't tell anyone cOz it's gross lol
 
i hate that we are struggling to buy food to live and OH's ex goes mad if we are a minute late paying her maintenance into her account. she claims all the benefits under the sun for SD and sends her to us with not even a clean pair of underwear so we have to provide for her as well. really frustrates me!!! nothing i can do about it tho eh? stOOpid!!
 
So SIL, your card arrived - on Tuesday. Her birthday was Saturday. It was postmarked Monday. So clearly you were lying through your fat a**e when you told MIL on SUNDAY that you had posted one the week before and couldn't understand where it was. The fact that you got it from funkypigeon.com leads me to believe that you went on the internet and did it after MIL had a go at you on Sunday. But, yeah. Whatever.

And as for putting on it "my precious niece", if she was that precious, you wouldn't have called her mother (me) a lying b***h for no reason, humiliated her father (DH), you would have sent her birthday card on time, and you would have asked how she was after major neurosurgery, not waited 8 weeks. Oh, and I'm pretty sure if she was that "precious" to you, you wouldn't have told me to terminate.

F**k off, witch.
 
Doctor,

Thanks for making me feel like a douche cause Xavier still drinks formula. Makes me feel like a bad mom.



Also, MIL:

MUAHAHHAHAH YOU DON'T GET TO COME VISIT CAUSE THEY DIDN'T APPROVE YOU! MUAHAHHAHAHA. BITCH.
 
What's wrong with him drinking formula? :shrug:
And lol about MIL!

OH GOD, MY FIRST ON CALL IN TWO YEARS AND I'M STUCK WITH 6 PATIENTS!!!!

FUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKK! That's about 5 hours work tomorrow :cry:
 
Cousin-in-law-in-law: Dude. I know you and your wife do not live together. You do not have to pretend for me.

On that same note - cousin-in-law (wife of above): GROW UP and STAND UP TO YOUR MOMMY. You're 40 years old, if you want to be with the father of your children and the man you are still married to, then BE WITH HIM. FFS. This is all way too confusing and my heart breaks for your children - if I'm confused, how much more confused are they?

Half-aunt: FFS. You are SUCH a snob. My God. *rolls eyes*
 
Self...you need to sort your shit out. If your not happy with your weight then move yourself & sort it out. ORdering take out is not the answer!

You just need to sort your shit. Things are about it get really hard & being all down & out over stuff you can sort out is pointless!
 
Builders next door - SHUT UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

Me - get dressed!

Boss - you. are. a. cowbag.

Bed - stop calling me!
 
Scotland can't be that bad Oz, they do have battered mars bars after all...

Can't wait to get my baby home!
 
Yummy, but twixs are better! ;)
Right, on a diet, bored with it already, need thinspiration!!!
 
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