This is going to be very controversial, but...

[redpoppy]

I was making a documentary about teenage dads (which never got made in the end) but the amount of ignorance with young men/older boys is RIDICULOUS!!!! i had a 17 year old boy tell me he wasn't using contraception but knew the girl wasn't a virgin and since the girl had been with this other guy he knew and since the girl herself told him that they never used contraception he thought it would be okay as she hadn't gotten pregnant so far.

So anyway, he's a17 year old dad now.

The other thing I found interesting was that quite a few teenage girls, when you talk to them in groups, seemed to laugh about how they really wanted to get pregnant but didn't tell their partners. Lots of stories of "my sister did this" or "my best friend" etc. But when it came to them they all claimed it was an accident and they hadn't planned it and most hadn't used contraceptive.

I don't think it's something to look down upon them about though. I think many people do and I do understand why especially in regards to the dishonesty that might be involved but the reality is that women have been having babies in their late teens for millennia and now that society isn't made for that as well as it used to be we're getting annoyed at these girls. While at the same time all you hear is how bad it is for us to wait till we're past 30.

just some thought and experiences for ya!

 

[Tiff]

I don't believe in accidents if you are using some form of contraception. In my mind, that means you understand that Abstinence is the only 100% form of Birth Control, so if you are doing the deed, there's a chance you can become pregnant.

Claire wasn't planned, but she's here anyways. So in my mind that means she was meant to be.

 

[Justagirlxx]

I was watching the show 16 and Pregnant the other day and the girl was asked if she planned the baby. She said no. And then she was asked were you using protection? And she again said no. To me that makes zero sense. If you are not using protection and you are having sex, you are trying to conceive a baby. And she can't blame it on lack of education because they start Sex Ed when you are like 6 in the US.

Anyways my baby wasn't planned but he wasn't an accident. I knew birth control wasn't 100% effective and I had sex so I take 100% responsibility (Well maybe 50%) for him being conceived.

 

[linsayp]

Ermm.. I think sometimes you can have an accident (ie condom splitting, missing pill & forgetting to use condom) and then just hope that you won't get pregnant, then I suppose you accidentally got preggers?

Or blokes can have a vasectomy, women can be on the pill, have the coil fitted or the implant thing and still one of the little buggers come through! Then it's definitely an accident because you've done your best to try not to get pregnant and still have!

You can't be expected to abstain because no form of contraception is 100% effective. There would be alot of frustrated men and women out there if that was the case! Not everybody has sex just to have a baby... Now if they just didn't use any contraception at all and just kept doing it and hoping they won't get pregnant, that isn't an accident!

 

[HannahGraceee]

Ava was a surpise, i knew what i was doing though, sexusally active 0 conception!

i was just one of them girls who thought it would never happen to me, now i have a 19 month old!

 

[NuKe]

I actually remember watching a documentary about this married couple who went to their doctor as they could not conceive a child. after asking them questions etc he managed to get to the root of the problem- they were sleeping in seperate beds!! they honestly thought that they just had to go to sleep in the same room and they would get pregnant! I cant believe in this day and age people are soo sheltered!! especially as adults! its incomprehensible to me!! anyway, they ended up going to months of therapy and sex education and ended up having a child

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

My 2 were not overly planned. I knew it would happen eventually I just didnt think about much after getting pregnant if that makes sense. If I actually knew what being a parent entailed I may have been more careful!

I have 2 children now. I am not in a position right now to fall pregnant so I MAKE sure that I have made that risk as small as possible. I take my pill on time every day and if its only a tiny bit late we use a condom just to be sure. I dont want to take any risks as I really dont want another baby.

One of my "friends" I know up the school, she has 6 children and really doesn't need to have any more (shes not the best mum lets say) She is pregnant with her 7th and acts like she's in astonishment that she became pregnant after 1 time unprotected. I couldn't believe it, How could she be so naive?

 

[NuKe]

i dont get it either.

 

[blinkybaby]

We got pregnant unexpectedy but I wouldn't call it an accident although it was accidental - I should probably refer to it more as a surprise pregnancy. Without going into all the gory details we had been using the rhythm method of contraception and withdrawal successfully for over a year and after one night of excessive drinking my OH 'accidently' finished inside me with my permission, apparently (although this is still contested by me LOL). But anyway, we both know how to make a baby and I do not believe it was an 'accident' as such but I do believe it was unplanned.x

 

[PrayinForBaby]

I think if you are taking measures to prevent pregnancy by using contraception (correctly and everytime etc) and you still become pregnant, then I think the term "accident" could be used, but I prefer more of 'surprise pregnancy' or 'unplanned pregnancy' as I dont see babies as accidents. But, if you're just not taking measures to prevent pregnancy, then thats just being foolish if you don't want babies, because it only takes 1 time, 1 egg, and 1 sperm.
And my hubby and I used condoms up until July of last year we did it once without a condom, I did get pregnant but miscarried at 6 weeks along. Then in October, we didnt use contraception, but were trying to get pregnant using OPK's and we did conceive my sweet Haley.

 

[PeanutBean]

I find it interesting how many people interpret the word accident to have negative connotations, for me there is no judgement in the word. In fact it implies no judgement in the case at all, an absence of blame.

 

[LandN]

My daughter was unplanned but i wouldn't change her for the world. Contraception failed, and i was limited to contraception anyway as i have a blood clotting disorder.

My mother had her tubes tied and she fell pregnant with triplets.

 

[Eve]

Nope... I don't. I mean if you don't want to get pregnant do not have sex. I think there is unplaned, but not accidental.

I haven't read the rest of the thread or anything so sorry if it's already been said... just my opinion.

 

[sarah0108]

I say i accidently fell pregnant with max because really i did. Contraception was used but just didnt work that one time and im my eyes it was an 'accident' (but i like to use unplanned ) as it wasnt SUPPOSED to happen IYSWIM?

But i agree. Dont have sex if you dont want to risk getting pregnant i knew the risks obviously but never once thought id get pregnant using contraception, theres always that 'risk' but you just assume you'd be covered.

Both of mine were unplanned but i dont like to be negative about it (or let anyone else sya negative things to me about it ) i just like to think of them as little unexpected gifts

 

[pinkclaire]

Doesn't accident mean something that could have been prevented? I think you can get accidentally pregnant but a lot of people who use it I find weren't using any contraception. You can't call that an accident surely?

 

[AriannasMama]

Its possible. I had been on the pill for almost 3 years with no problem, so OH and I didn't use condoms....long story short, I got pregnant, while taking the pill correctly.

 

[Serene123]

Caitlyn was a whoopsy baby.... The morning after pill failed and I got pregnant by accident I didn't mean to? So it was an accident?

 

[Fraggles]

Sorry not read the whole thread but from the OP I guess yes it is technically an accident. We take a calculated risk when we use contraception. We are told the percentage of failure and go with it. I think falling pregnant while using contraception is an accident as opposed to planning to try for a baby.

Ive fallen pregnant while using contraception it was an accident as in I felt my risk of pregnancy was low.