This morning

[chell5544]

I just can't deal with my kids crying. I tried CIO with my daughter and it lasted less than a minute. She was over a year old, too. I just can't personally do it. If people want to do that then fair enough. I personally don't think not wanting to sleep in your own bed is an imprisonable (if that's a word lol) offence.

I think this is where people are getting abit confused this is about a child not wanting to SLEEP FULL STOP he wasn't jumping into his parents bed in the middle of the night he was wandering about, exploring and getting hurt in the process.

 

[LegoHouse]

I would have tried to find out why he wasn't sleeping. Changed his diet. Done a million and one things before it came to that anyway.

I feel sorry for the parents for feeling like that was there only option. It must have been horrible. I don't think for a second they enjoyed it. I just wouldn't do it, my last resort would be taking it in turns with my OH to be up all night, not locking him in his bedroom. That's just me though.

 

[LoraLoo]

I would have tried to find out why he wasn't sleeping. Changed his diet. Done a million and one things before it came to that anyway.

I feel sorry for the parents for feeling like that was there only option. It must have been horrible. I don't think for a second they enjoyed it. I just wouldn't do it, my last resort would be taking it in turns with my OH to be up all night, not locking him in his bedroom. That's just me though.

How do you know they didnt? They said they tried everything, nowhere did they say their first option was a lock on the door.

 

[Natsku]

They said they tried everything they could before that though. Taking turns to stay up all night at that point is not healthy for the parents - they need to sleep too. If it was just a phase then absolutely I would agree just take turns staying awake til it ends but it had been going on for 6 months already - I think thats long enough to try something.

 

[LegoHouse]

I guess I don't know, but he was pretty young for them to have tried everything.

 

[LegoHouse]

Nothing anyone says will make leaving a 3 year old on their own in their bedroom feel less uneasy to me lol

 

[LoraLoo]

I guess I don't know, but he was pretty young for them to have tried everything.

I agree. I also think in 6 months it was too soon, that they should have persevered with one method. But only the parents know how bad it really was and if we take their word for it, he was putting himself in danger. Maybe they really didnt have any other options left

 

[LegoHouse]

Well to me, locking him in his bedroom would never have become an option, last or first. I would never have thought to do that. Well I hope I wouldn't. I certainly wouldn't be out telling the papers about it if I did! He isn't even ashamed!!

 

[LoraLoo]

Well to me, locking him in his bedroom would never have become an option, last or first. I would never have thought to do that. Well I hope I wouldn't. I certainly wouldn't be out telling the papers about it if I did! He isn't even ashamed!!

Maybe he isnt ashamed because he feels he did the right thing, just like you or I feel like we do the right thing for our children. Theres alot of things i dont agree with that other parents do, doesnt make them monsters.

 

[LegoHouse]

I'm sure there are things some parents do that do make you think they're monsters though, right? Or maybe not. But sometimes I read/see things and I do think parents are monsters and I don't understand everything I hear/read/witness. I'm sure even with the man sat next to me he couldn't make me understand it.

 

[OmarsMum]

I guess I don't know, but he was pretty young for them to have tried everything.

I agree. I also think in 6 months it was too soon, that they should have persevered with one method. But only the parents know how bad it really was and if we take their word for it, he was putting himself in danger. Maybe they really didnt have any other options left

I will never lock a kid in a room to sleep. But when I saw my friend's kid, & heard about the things he does when they're not around, I agreed with them that it was for the best. As I mentioned earlier he hated co-sleeping or having his parents in his bedroom. It's the only thing that worked. But they don't leave him for hours to cry himself to sleep, the mum leaves the door shut when he goes to bed, he settles himself to sleep, once he falls asleep they lock him in.

He cried few nights but it wasn't for hours, then he got used to it, & he stopped crying at bedtime after few nights,

He wakes up happy in the morning, he knocks on the door or speaks to his parents over the monitor to let him out. It works for them, they sleep much better & the kid is away from danger.

It is much better than finding your kid with a stranger at your front door. If their neighbor didn't see him before he took the lift to go downstairs to go to the supermarket across the street, he would have been kidnapped or worse hit by a car.

At 1st I found it hard to understand what they're doing, but my kid is totally different, he loves bed sharing, he's not into trouble & he's cautious by nature. So we never had or thought of going for any extreme actions to get him to sleep or to keep him away from danger.

 

[LegoHouse]

Getting the child to sleep then locking them in is a lot different to locking your child in and them trying to escape though? Whilst you walk away and ignore them? *shudder* I don't even like thinking about it

 

[LoraLoo]

I'm sure there are things some parents do that do make you think they're monsters though, right? Or maybe not. But sometimes I read/see things and I do think parents are monsters and I don't understand everything I hear/read/witness. I'm sure even with the man sat next to me he couldn't make me understand it.

Or maybe not?? Trust me, I have seen 2 of my children buried, there are people i believe do not even deserve children. I don't think you should be insinuiating otherwise.

I dont think someone letting their child cry 3 hours, for 1 night, is a Monster.

 

[LoraLoo]

If he let his child roam around the house at night and ended up seriously hurting himself, you would be sat here accusing him of neglect and bad parenting

 

[Natsku]

You can never know what you will do until your in the situation. I never thought I would do CC but I ended up doing. Things change, needs change. children change and circumstances change. You have to adjust to changes sometimes even if it means going against your ideals. I mean sure, hats off to anyone who can stick to the ideals through thick and thin but also hats off to anyone who realises that their ideals are maybe not whats best for their child or for them.

 

[LegoHouse]

I wasn't insinuating you don't, I was trying not to insinuate you do lol

 

[LoraLoo]

I wasn't insinuating you don't, I was trying not to insinuate you do lol

 

[Natsku]

If he let his child roam around the house at night and ended up seriously hurting himself, you would be sat here accusing him of neglect and bad parenting

Exactly! Safety has to come first, even if it means the child gets upset. Its much better that they cry a bit than they fall down the stairs and break a bone or wander out on the street and get run over!

 

[LegoHouse]

Can you not get them to sleep nicely and then lock the door though?

Crying for 3 hours would give me a major headache.

 

[LoraLoo]

Can you not get them to sleep nicely and then lock the door though?

Crying for 3 hours would give me a major headache.

Maybe he was crying when they were using the 'nicer' methods anyway. I used to rock/feed mine to sleep and they would fight and fight me, cry, stiffen up. We co-slept. I did this for months/years until eventually resorting to CC when i felt the time was right. It took 3 nights with them crying on and off- every 5 minutes i went in to cuddle/reassure them. The longest time any cried for was 30 mins on the first night. To me that is fine. Others might not agree but its what we needed. My daughter wasnt getting any sleep at all co-sleeping, hubby wasd sleeping on the floor, i wasnt getting any sleep and was having to deal with 2 other children through the day. Some people may not agree with CC but as parents we do what we feel is right. For me it wasnt just for the child, it was for all of us, i had other children to consider too.