This morning

[NickNac]

While I don't agree with locking up your child, I get that they felt they had to do it because they believed it was the only way to keep him safe. Fine.

Why then must the child be locked up from 7 to 7? I'm sorry but then they just ecpected the child to play by hinself if he woke up at 5 am? Sleep deprivation is one thing, but goodness sake, how selfish are they that they can't even spend time with their son and play? Surely at that point the parents can't play the I'm too tired and marriage is going to end card.

This.

I understand why they locked the door and having twins and a partner that works shifts I had to come to terms with the fact that I couldn't cuddle both of them when they were upset and there have been times when one or the other have cried themselves to sleep, whilst I'm trying to get the other one off. Most of the time I was crying with them

However I don't understand the morning thing, if your child is up for the day at 5am (and they did say this wasn't a regular thing) then as far as I am concerned, you get up with them.

 

[lozzy21]

If going down two flights of stairs in the dark is an issue, leave a light on. If the child is going into the kitchen and playing with knifes, put a lock on the kitchen door. You do not need to lock a child up for 12 hours a day for 5 months because dont forget ladies it was not just an hour or two while he went to sleep and started sleeping through. They said he started sleeping through after the 3rd night but locked him in for another 5 months. That is the bit im not comfortable with.

 

[lozzy21]

They also said at 2.5 that he started trying to climb out of his cot, to me that is a clear indication of it being time for a bed but no, they put him in a sleeping bag to try and stop him getting out. Everything they have read sounds like they could just not be bothered to sort him out and took the easiest way out.

 

[Soph n Chris]

Just because they didn't remove the bolt for five months doesn't mean they used it for five months...

Also they didn't say that they never got up with their son...

 

[lozzy21]

He said on the interview he locked the door at 7pm untill 7am every night for 5 months and just left him to it.

Five months later and Sonny is now three-and-a-half. He still occasionally wakes at 5am, but has everything he wants in his room to entertain him, plus a potty, so he merrily plays away until we go in at 7am.

So they dont get up with him untill 7am

 

[Soph n Chris]

.....So he merrily plays away....

If I hear my son cooing away in the morning I go back to sleep. He lets me know when he needs me.

I would have thought if he wasn't merrily playing away they would have gone to him...

 

[Larkspur]

I wonder if they had consulted a psychiatrist? The number of wakings seems so extreme that I feel like something else must have been going on. That behavior certainly can't be healthy for the little boy at all.

Yes! I find it amazing that they said to themselves, 'He's clean, fed, warm and dry, what else could he possibly want?' and apparently considered that an entirely rhetorical question. Um, more stimulation during the day, less stimulation during the evening, comfort, a different bedtime and wake time, permission to play quietly in his room with a nightlight if he woke up, a psych evaluation or more physical activity are just a few possibilities that immediately come to mind.

What would have happened if something had been really wrong, like an acute crisis? I was struck by appendicitis in the middle of the night when I was a kid, and got up and went to my parents... I needed surgery within hours. If I'd had a lock on my door and my parents had ignored my screams as a tantrum, I could well have died.

 

[Button#]

I think the fact that the dad blackmailed and pushed the mum into it says a lot. I emailed the link to my OH and he said he's speaking about his little boy like he is an animal.

 

[lozzy21]

.....So he merrily plays away....

If I hear my son cooing away in the morning I go back to sleep. He lets me know when he needs me.

I would have thought if he wasn't merrily playing away they would have gone to him...

They left him to cry locked in his room for three hours and did not go in untill the following morning, please find me where they have said they comforted him because everything i have read says the opposite.

 

[Natasha2605]

If going down two flights of stairs in the dark is an issue, leave a light on. If the child is going into the kitchen and playing with knifes, put a lock on the kitchen door. You do not need to lock a child up for 12 hours a day for 5 months because dont forget ladies it was not just an hour or two while he went to sleep and started sleeping through. They said he started sleeping through after the 3rd night but locked him in for another 5 months. That is the bit im not comfortable with.

I agree with you. I'm disgusted by this. I'm not against CC/CIO in older toddlers but what they did is absolutely shocking. They weren't happy that it worked by night 3, they STILL insisted on locking him away for another five months. Poor child. No wonder he took the hint and stopped getting up.

 

[Soph n Chris]

I am talking about the morning when he wakes. Their issue is with him staying in his bed/room. Not falling asleep. They haven't said their is a problem with him sleeping but an issue with him understanding that he needs to sleep in his bed at night time.

I didn't say that they did or didn't comfort him just that I would have thought they would have gone to him in the morning if he needed them...

 

[fidgets mammy]

At the end of the day no one knows these people. We dont know if they sat and cried whilst the child cried in his room. We dont know how affected they actually were by it all. Sleep deprivation is horrendous!! Some nights i can b up every half hr with the twins and i feel so tired i could be sick. For him to announce it nationally i doubt it was a qiuck fix. Ive also sn him before on tv. He used to be a sahd and was talking about how exhausting it is.
We can all easily say lock the kitchen door, do this do that but we are not in their shoes.

Personally i dont think.i could lock him in but thats ME, im not daying they r wrong to do it because im not them, thats not my child and ive no idea what they went through to resort to that.

 

[Soph n Chris]

At the end of the day no one knows these people. We dont know if they sat and cried whilst the child cried in his room. We dont know how affected they actually were by it all. Sleep deprivation is horrendous!! Some nights i can b up every half hr with the twins and i feel so tired i could be sick. For him to announce it nationally i doubt it was a qiuck fix. Ive also sn him before on tv. He used to be a sahd and was talking about how exhausting it is.
We can all easily say lock the kitchen door, do this do that but we are not in their shoes.

Personally i dont think.i could lock him in but thats ME, im not daying they r wrong to do it because im not them, thats not my child and ive no idea what they went through to resort to that.

Exactly.... well said

 

[lozzy21]

Yes hes also the bloke that wrote an article on how seeing his wife go through birth put him off sex for a year. He sounds like an arse in that article too

 

[Sarahcake]

You know what, I actually do understand why they did it. I dont think its the best thing they could have done and its certainly not something that I would do but hey, sleep deprivation can do funny things to people and I cant say I blame them for wanting some solution, any solution to the problem. I know I would feel bloody awful if I was those parents mind. I was neglected by my dad as a kid, I was locked in my room for days at a time - yes granted thats a different circumstance, but that kid will still feel the same abandonment and sadness I felt being locked in there.

One thing that really irks me about that bloke though, is that he gave his wife an ultimatum, do it or loose me. Its like he was punishing her for something that was beyond her control and something she was also suffering with. Not fair at all, and I would have shown him the door had that been me, Its like he blamed her for the situation and emotionally blackmailed her into something she wasnt comfortable doing with her child.

 

[Larkspur]

Yes hes also the bloke that wrote an article on how seeing his wife go through birth put him off sex for a year. He sounds like an arse in that article too

Right, thank you, I get it now. This guy is another Samantha Brick. A narcissist paid to be a controversialist. End of discussion for me.

 

[fidgets mammy]

Im sure hes not the only bloke whos bn put pff sex by childbirth he just happens to b one that says it.
Why dont we just hang him up and throw stones at him too after all he must be such an awful awful man.

 

[lozzy21]

He told his wife if she did not agree to him locking their son up he was leaving her, doesn't sound like some one i would nominate for husband of the year.

 

[LoraLoo]

He told his wife if she did not agree to him locking their son up he was leaving her, doesn't sound like some one i would nominate for husband of the year.

I didnt realise we were debating how he was as a husband Besides, he said he would go and stay at a hotel, I didnt read that as permanantly leaving her?

 

[babyrough]

I haven't read past the first page of this thread but I did watch it on this morning, and am I the only one who doesn't think it a big deal?
So his kid wouldn't sleep in his bed and wandered around, I don't understand why locking his door was such an issue? Like he said by the second night he had learnt and slept the whole night in his bed. I really don't see the issue unless he left him screaming banging against his bedroom door.

Also maybe I missed them mentioning it but wouldnt an easier solution be to put a stairgate on his room? Then he can't get out but he is not locked in.