TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[labrat44]

Dwrgi, that sounds like a wonderful plan, something you can look forward to, instead of dread. Always easier to follow through with something that makes you happy! And always easier to make progress with a plan! That's why I am an obsessive list maker - I can get stuff planned, then sometimes I do it!!

Skye, have a great trip!

BangBang, welcome! The ladies here know a lot about IVF and should be able to answer your questions! Glad you found this site.

 

[skye2010]

BangBang most of us here have experienced a frustrating experience with drs. Unfortunately fertility is a very specialised issue and even the specialists can be quite indifferent to the psychological aspect of it. When TTC prolongs it can bring depression and even create problems between couples. So don't feel you are singled out at all. It's only normal that you are so worried about it especially when your cycle is acting in a way you have never experienced.

I have just had my second IVF treatment. There is a lot of girls who have had IUI. From comparing our experiences I can say that IUI is much easier and less stressfull in many ways. The treatment itself has less hormones, you get scanned (ultrasound and bloods) much less. And after the insemination you can carry on with your normal life. However the success rates are much less than IVF so it can take longer to adjust the right dosage of medication that suits your body. Meaning you might have a few IUI's before success (Saying that a friend of mine got pregnant on her first so don't get scared of this) IUI can be done back to back. Meaning once you start cycling you don't need a gap between your periods.

IVF pumps more hormones in your body (more scans) You have 2 sedated procedures Hysterescopy: Checks your uterus and cleans up any scar tissue at the beginning of the cycle. Egg retrieval: They collect the eggs out of you to fertiize in lab. They're both very easy half an hour procedures but you get very tired and shaken after egg collection. Fertilized embryos are put back directly into your womb so it cuts back some of the work that your body should be doing. So ie IF you have a problem in tubes or fertilising etc the drs jump those steps. That's why the success rates are higher than IUI but physically it's harder. The suspense of waiting for embies to grow in the lab is stressful too. Also your ovaries are forced to produce more eggs in a single cycle so if it fails you need to wait 2 cycles to try another IVF.

IUI is much cheaper and easier than IVF. My personal opinion it's really worth trying before IVF unless time is an issue. I chose not to do it cause I just couldn't take it psychologically. I just wanted to get it done with. Although in the end I ended up waiting much longer for various reasons. I also think going for IUI makes more sense than just assisted conception. If you are getting all the meds: hormones +trigger why not have the insemination? It just doesn't make sense cause the sperms might have an issue reaching your uterus, insemination is really easy and cuts that step. (It's almost like a smear test)

However I have no idea about your situation. One of us here was not ovulating due to PCOs and got pregnant on IUI but she didn't have the bleeding issue. Have you had FSH, AMH, thyroid and progestrone checked? I would imagine you would probably need a full blood count as well since you have been losing so much. Might be lacking in iron etc... + tube dye test "HSG" to make sure your tubes are not blocked. I suggest you get your fertility specialists to have your full fertility scans done. Also the sperm count and swim up test for DH. Than you can sit down with him and discuss which treatment would suit you the best. It's easier to make a decision when you have a good picture of your fertility profile.

One more suggestion and I think many of us would agree, if your communication with your specialist isn't good you should reconsider or find a way to get him cooporate. Cause this is a confusing issue and you must have the dr explaining to you what's going on.
Good luck

Dwrgi did you know that the success for fertility is better in the spring? The sun really helps It definitely helps the mood anyway. Let us know when you book cause I'm curious. I'm a little better today thank you. I can at least walk around, not too fast or long but at least I don't get cramps. I think I should be better by next weekend.
xxx

 

[onmymind17]

Just wanted to say thanks to all my friends here on TTC 1st 35+ and the
Graduates thread for your kind words and prayers. Just trying to work through it all hour by hour, day by day.

But I am still here hoping and praying for all your BFPs and the arrivals of those beautiful bouncing babies on the Graduates thread.

Much love to you all

I can only send you love and prayers, my heart just breaks for you!! I pray that God gives you the strength to get through this.

 

[onmymind17]

Good morning ladies, still no af for me, weird, i am normally a 25 day cycle, she should have been here wed, now its friday and nothing, i feel like it will be here, but not even a spot yet. I tested on sunday, it was BFN, i am afraid to waste a test now, i know as soon as i take it she will show up lol.

You and I are just about floating in the same boat. I am normally a 25-day cycle so the should've landed today (CD26)...aside from a bit of low-grade crampiness and lower abdominal gurgling on and off all week, no sign of her yet. I haven't tested, and don't want to get my hopes up because the progesterone I'm on always delays AF, so I think I'll just wait until Sunday or Monday morning to test. I only have 2 tests left from the last round of BFN tests, so like you I don't want to waste them because dimes to doughnuts AF will show her ugly mug soon as I POS. The ovulation calendar I use at babymed.com indicates that, if pregnant, 95% of tests will show positive by May 16, so may as well wait. Pretty used to waiting by now anyway!

I will keep my fighers crossed for you!!!! I am not on progesterone, and i have had it where she was a day late, but never two days late. I have a bit of campiness, and my lower back is hurting today, the one werid thing for me is i am so warm, i am constantly sweating these past few days, its driving me nuts, normally i get that a day before af, and then it goes away, this time i am still like a blast furnace. The reason i am not getting excited is i checked my cervix and to me it seems firm and open, i dont know though maybe i am wrong, normally i will check it and i can tell the firmness but never if its open lol. I will wait until tonight, if nothing then i will test, i dont really think i am pg, but just in case i would not want to mess something up. It would be funny that the one time i was like it wont happen, would be when it does lol. Sending you tons of

Re: the sweating...me too!! I've been waking up in the middle of the night all week, boiling hot, but when I look over at DH, he's all snuggled into the covers, sleeping and comfortable as can be. Just yesterday I was complaining to my acupuncturist about it. For me, though, it could be the progesterone suppositories...or the Chinese herb protocol he has me on. Now he wants me to keep a "hot flash" journal so he can figure out what's going on. HappyHappyJoyJoy. For you though.....hmmmmm ...it could just be (I won't say it so as not to jinx anything! ). Just know that I have every crossable body part crossed for you (eyes included, which is making it difficult to read what I'm typing ).

I have no idea how to tell what my cervix is doing, despite being "up there" all the time with those blasted progesterone suppositories.

I'll be on pins and needles waiting to hear your test results! Keep us all posted! Dust, Dust and more DUST to you for a !!

Unfortunatly the evil witch showed saturday, but you know what its ok, right now my DH and i are going through a lot of stuff with both of our jobs, lets just say the stress level is through the roof right now, i have to say i am kind of glad i am not pg right now, we could be looking at the possibility of him or me losing our jobs, and then we would be in big trouble. Sigh.... I swear i think sometimes God hates us. How about you? any good news? I am keeping everything crossed for you!!!!

 

[missyt]

Skye, I am still over the moon about your news! Its so good to hear about an IVF success story for all of us considering IVF. I would love for you to hang around this thread for a while. Your trip to Florence sounds wonderful! So jealous!

Dwrgi, I think its good you are considering all things before you start IVF. I've been going through the same thing lately. There are so many factors involved and its not an easy decision. Its a decsion only you should make because you are the one going through most of it. I think its a little unfair when the specialists try to force it on us because they don't understand what is going on in our personal lives.

BangBang, welcome! This is a wonderful group of supportive ladies. TTC is a very stressful thing. The hardest thing I've ever been through. Don't think you are a crazy woman because we all have exprerienced that more than once, I'm sure. Lord knows I have!

Onmymind, sorry AF showed. That witch! I understand about the job situation. Mine has been very stressful lately. Sometimes I think God hates me too but then I think that he has a plan for all of us. Like you said about the jobs right now, maybe he is waiting for yours and DH's job situation to get better and then you'll have a baby. I keep telling myself and God needs me to help DH with all the home improvement projects we've been doing lately and when we're done (which should be at the end of the summer) I'll get pregnant. I'm fx'd for both of us.

Hello Ginger, Luvvie, MA, Jocr, HA, FM, Lava, Nikki, Titi, Padbrat, Labrat, Jennifer and anyone else I missed.

AFM, I started clomid on Saturday and now I'm taking 100mg. I initiatlly started with 50mg for my 1st and 2nd IUI and 75mg for the 3rd one. I'm also supposed to be taking and extra half vial of Gonal-F this time too. The specialist said we would take a more aggressive approach this time so we'll see. This weekend DH and I were painting our bedroom. We went to put the bed back against the wall and the frame broke! The first thing on my mind was how we were going to BD with a broken bed! Then I started thinking that I wish we had broken the bed while we were BDing. Anyway, I thought I'd share a funny story with you all.

 

[missyt]

Hi MJ, I didn't forget you!

 

[skye2010]

Hahahahaha, Missy, hahahhahahahah . Just like in the movies!!!

 

[Baby4MJ]

Unfortunatly the evil witch showed saturday, but you know what its ok, right now my DH and i are going through a lot of stuff with both of our jobs, lets just say the stress level is through the roof right now, i have to say i am kind of glad i am not pg right now, we could be looking at the possibility of him or me losing our jobs, and then we would be in big trouble. Sigh.... I swear i think sometimes God hates us. How about you? any good news? I am keeping everything crossed for you!!!!

OMM!
Down with the witch! Booo Hisss! Sorry she showed her ugly mug to you, but if you're going through all that work stress, not really prime time for babymaking as you said. I hope your and your DH's jobs are safe - last thing you need is more stress, that's for sure! When it rains it pours. I often think God has it out for me too, so you're not alone in that thought.

Well, I still feel the witch circling and ready to make her descent, but she's not here yet. She will be soon, I'm sure of that. I caved in and tested Saturday (1 day after AF was due to arrive) and - OF COURSE - it was yet another . The 21st BFN out of 24 attempts. Depressing when I put it that way, isn't it? Anyhoooo...I'm not down and out about it, though I'm a little surprised because DH and I were like this cycle. I'm 3 days late now, but the progesterone always pushes AF late. I stopped taking it on Saturday, so I expect AF to land within the next 24-48 hours. I've been all crampy for over a week so now that I have a BFN I want AF to just get here already - sheesh! It's all ok, though...DH and I are creating self-imposed stress because we've decided (after 2 years of putting it off waiting for this non-existent baby to arrive) to finally put our house up for sale and move. I met with our realtor on Saturday, whom I love (I've known her for 10 years and she has gone through 4 miscarriages herself) ...so it is nice to have someone in my corner. I think (we all do - realtor, DH and I) that it's a good time to redirect my focus elsewhere. So if all goes well, we'll be ready to sell in a few weeks. YAY! We need a bit more space (this was supposed to be our "starter house" and 9 years later we're still living in it!), so baby or none, it's all good I think.

Thank you for all the crossed fingers and toes. Not our time this time it seems, but soon, definitely soon!

I really hope all works out with the jobs!! I will be sprinkling both baby dust and job dust your way!

And to all the other lovely ladies, welcome to the newbies, HURRAH for those who are preggo, and tons of to those who are waiting for their !!

 

[twinkle1975]

Hi Skye. Yes, I plan to go on total bedrest myself though I will be going to church on sundays "if" there isn't a problem. We are buying a dorm refrigerator to keep things cool and I think the ladies in the church will make a couple meals a week for us to help with that end.

We went out to pay on our nursery layaway at babies r us and I decided to purchase a couple of preemie outfits. When Jackson came early I was unprepared and so was the hospital. I'll refrain from sharing what they actually put him in but I was PISSED. He was still alive then too. So to be prepared I bought a couple preemie outfits and will look online for a micropreemie outfit. In all hopefullness I'm praying I wouldn't need ANY of them and will give them to someone who WILL need it. I believe God has his hand on this womb and that He will help us carry Amelia to a safe point, I just need to be prepared because I don't ever want to go through what I went through with Jackson. I felt like I was a terrible mother for not giving him the simplest of necessities. What mother prepares for something like that?! Anyways, we'll start shopping for regular infant clothes at wk 28 the end of July.

I've stopped cooking and sewing altogether.

We purchased a Mac today! Finally I can get rid of that terrible Microsoft and Explorer. I'm enjoying it already!!

Welcome to all the newbies! You'll love it here.

Love to everyone.

Oh oh!!!! I'm so out of it I've only just seen that we're waiting for Amelia!!!! That's SO exciting!!! You're always in my prayers xxx

 

[twinkle1975]

Titi - sending you lots of love and hugs
Skye - you know you're always welcome here - in fact don't leave!!!
HA - glad you're back posting regularly honey - I was starting to feel like someone who'd been kept back a grade with lots of people who are lovely but haven't been hanging around behind the bike sheds for a year & ending up with an F like I have!! (I don't think that is quite what I mean but can't put it any better!!)

Hello Newbies & hey to everyone else xxx

 

[Mommy's Angel]

Hi Skye. Yes, I plan to go on total bedrest myself though I will be going to church on sundays "if" there isn't a problem. We are buying a dorm refrigerator to keep things cool and I think the ladies in the church will make a couple meals a week for us to help with that end.

We went out to pay on our nursery layaway at babies r us and I decided to purchase a couple of preemie outfits. When Jackson came early I was unprepared and so was the hospital. I'll refrain from sharing what they actually put him in but I was PISSED. He was still alive then too. So to be prepared I bought a couple preemie outfits and will look online for a micropreemie outfit. In all hopefullness I'm praying I wouldn't need ANY of them and will give them to someone who WILL need it. I believe God has his hand on this womb and that He will help us carry Amelia to a safe point, I just need to be prepared because I don't ever want to go through what I went through with Jackson. I felt like I was a terrible mother for not giving him the simplest of necessities. What mother prepares for something like that?! Anyways, we'll start shopping for regular infant clothes at wk 28 the end of July.

I've stopped cooking and sewing altogether.

We purchased a Mac today! Finally I can get rid of that terrible Microsoft and Explorer. I'm enjoying it already!!

Welcome to all the newbies! You'll love it here.

Love to everyone.

Oh oh!!!! I'm so out of it I've only just seen that we're waiting for Amelia!!!! That's SO exciting!!! You're always in my prayers xxx

Yup! We're waiting for Amelia! I can wait though for her to safely get here. We've been clearing out her nursery and I find myself going in there just to dream. A part of me is scared still with a funneling cervix already at only 19wks, but my goal is to get past the 22wk milestone, then the viability milestone at 24wks, then 28, then 36. I'm aiming high and trying my hardest. It's hard not to get down sometimes, my body just sucks and I feel as though with each dwindling measurement I'm letting her down. I know that's satan talking though and I need to focus on God is much more powerful. I think it's just the inability to control what's happening has me a bit depressed these days.

Anyways, it's time to come out of that pity party I'm in and focus on the good news that Amelia is right on target and looking forward to actually GETTING her to term.

Thank you for your kind prayers

 

[lavalux]

MA,
That is the right attitude. Even though we can't control things, we can take comfort that Amelia is in God's hands and growing just as she should be in your womb. I loved reading about you dreaming in the nursery, buying furniture & clothes, nesting in preparation for your little girl. What a wonderful day it will be when you can hold her.

Dwrgi,
I like your plan. Rest & relaxation on the beach, getting emotionally strong & ready for IVF if you need to take that step. Also, you will know that you've not rushed into anything but followed your instincts. Maybe you will even conceive naturally on that amazing vacation.

AFM,
I went in for my mid-check check. Everything looks good! The Clomid is working well. I have about 6 follies, but three of them are between 15-17 mm so they are responding to the hormones & should be ready by Friday. I'll do a HCG trigger shot if I don't catch my LH surge on my own. I'm feeling much more relaxed & positive about this cycle. I feel like we are going to get pregnant this month or next. I am encouraged too that I was strong enough to request a change in my medication. Clearly, the Clomid works better for me than the Femara & I didn't have side effects on either, but I'd rather have 3 big follies than one. I'm also pleased with my doctor who is on board with trying different meds and even going to injectibles if necessary next month. Hoping this is the one though!

 

[HappyAuntie]

HA - glad you're back posting regularly honey - I was starting to feel like someone who'd been kept back a grade with lots of people who are lovely but haven't been hanging around behind the bike sheds for a year & ending up with an F like I have!! (I don't think that is quite what I mean but can't put it any better!!)

That is EXACTLY how I feel!!!!!


Seriously, that feeling of being left behind is a tough one to deal with, and there's just no way of avoiding it. It's in those moments that I contemplate moving over to LTTTC... but I can't bear to leave this thread and the friends I have here.

I know there were other things I wanted to comment on, but they've all left my mind at the moment. Oh well.

Time to go watch DWTS. Have a lovely evening, all!

 

[lynnb]

Missyt – Sorry AF showed, wish that b*tch would just leave you all alone. Sounds like your specialist is really going for it this time, fx’d for you.

Redredwinelove & BangBang– welcome, hope your stay here is short

Onmymind17 – So sorry about AF & to hear your stressed about jobs, hope everything calms down soon

Baby4MJ – Are you testing again?

Tititimes2 – Sending you love & big

MA – So happy your scan went well & you got to see your little girl, Amelia is such a cute name. Not so good about your cervix length though but at least your not taking any chances this time, just hope the bed rest doesn’t become too boring or painful. Doug sounds like a complete angel, your so lucky to have found someone who will take care of you.

Pad – Hope your MILs funeral went as well as these things can & that you & dh are taking it easy. Have a glass of wine for me – I prefer Casillerio del Diablo Merlot.

Luvmydoggies – How did the fundraiser go?

Skye – How are your feeling hun? Would love to be your bump buddy

Dwrgi – Glad you’ve made a decision about IVF, the break will do you good & hopefully you’ll be more relaxed when you start.

HA – I’m so with you on the hats & long sleeves, it’s either that or factor 50, I’m a natural red head with very pale skin, so I get blistering sunburns too. Also don’t you dare leave, we need you here.

Also to Never, Lava, Jocr, FM, Twinkle, Nikki, Rowan & Labrat, hope you're all ok

AFM, I know I haven't posted for a few days & that was because I had some spotting over the weekend & wasn't in a good place, so I didn't want to bring anyone down with me. I went for my scan yesterday expecting the worst only to see a perfect LO, who we've now nicknamed Iri, with a hb. No sign of blood in my urterus, my cervix is closed & Iri is measuring perfectly for my dates so I came home with 2 gorgeous pics and a date for my 2nd scan. I can't tell you how relived I feel.

Love, & to all

 

[padbrat]

awww that is fabulous news Lynn... told ya all would be good xx

 

[Dwrgi]

Morning Everybody and thank you for all your support! I do feel so much better with The Plan, and I'm looking forward to meeting with a new acupuncturist tonight, so fingers crossed!

Hi Lynnb-I bet you were so relieved-I think EVERY part of baby-making is stressful, isn't it, from getting pregnant to the pregnancy itself...? I'm sure that you will sail through this one. Good luck hun!

Hi Lava-so glad that you are feeling more confident on this cycle. We have to be so strong, and we find that strength from experience and from the will to succeed. Go girl, and let's hope that those follies will be the perfect size by Friday! I am convinced that you are not far from your

Hi MA-it must be so hard for you, worrying about the IC and approaching important milestones in the PG. All I can say is that we have to face each day and hope for the best and I'm also positive that you will hold Amelia and take her home a happy, healthy baby! Thinking of you!,

HI Baby4MJ-good news that you've decided to sell up. Good to have something else to focus on, and it will take your mind off TTC. I'm soprry that you got another BFN-vile thing. I know exactly how you feel, I was told that at my age it would take on average two years to conceive..... we have to pitch in for the long haul! But, as they say, tomorrow is another day and a new cycle brings lots of new hope! Good luck hun!

Hi MissyT-brilliant story about the bed! I really hope that the meds are the perfect combo for you now, and that this will lead to your . Good luck with this hun!!

Thanks labrat44!

Hey Skye-glad you're feeling better. It does sound as if you've been through the mill! Plain sailing from now on, I hope! Enough cliches! Good luck!! I'm thinking of Portugal, a Meditteranean Island or ANYWHERE HOT! I hate the cold!!! Spring, eh?? It must be to do with mind over matter-people feeling happier, and obviously FRISKIER!

Hi Onmymind-sorry evil witch showed. It is always a blow. Next cycle though hun-go for it! Hope you're feeling okay-it sounds as if you have a lot going on for you at the moment. Hope everything works out okay for you and your DH! Good luck!

Hi Twinkle, Luvmydoggies (hope you're Kiwainis fundraiser went well-good on yer!!), Ginger, JoCR, HA, Padbrat, Nikki, BangBang, FM, Rowan, and anybody else I may have missed!

Lots and lots of to us all!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[lynnb]

awww that is fabulous news Lynn... told ya all would be good xx

I know you did and it does help to know that your in my corner so to speak but it's so hard to believe sometimes that things will be alright.

Hi Lynnb-I bet you were so relieved-I think EVERY part of baby-making is stressful, isn't it, from getting pregnant to the pregnancy itself...? I'm sure that you will sail through this one. Good luck hun!

You're so right about the stress but I don't think it's going to end at the birth because you then have the stress & worry that you're doing things right & that baby is OK. OMG the things we put our selves through but I'm sure it's worth all that stress & more.

 

[padbrat]

I always have your corner Lynn xx

 

[lynnb]

I always have your corner Lynn xx

I have yours too, how are feeling hun?

 

[Jocr]

Hi ladies
Sorry for the lack of posts but have been busy with work and life and have also had my laparoscopy at long last. To be honest have been stressed to the max but am now working my way out of it

My lap was successful and I got the all clear. I didn't really get a chance to speak to the fertility dr after as I was still so out of it. We have to go back to see him in four months if we sent preg by then.
So it seems we have no reason not to get preg so fingers crossed. I have been told (via a pamflet) no sex for six weeks. I will be back at it in four weeks When I am next fertile. It's a shame that I cant actually get to speak to my fertility dr to get facts.
Had a lot of egg White these past few days and it's so annoying not being able to crack on now. So it's another month off for me.

I'm sitting at home recooperating back to work on Thursday.

Anyone else feel a bit spacey for a few days after having a lap?

My next acu is next week to help get rid of any unwanted anaesthetic out and generally rebalance me, looking forward to it.

I will try and get on top of what everyone has been up to and how you are all doing.

Big hugs to you all
Jo xx