TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[tickledpink]

Can I tag along? I'm 36 and DH is 40. We've been TTC for 3 and a half years now... we did all the usual investigations and found out DH had a low SC. They finally signed our referral forms back in February but then refused funding, saying I was too old, we hadn't been trying long enough and DH's condition wasn't that serious and we could still get a natural BFP. We decided to go private in March and started IVF/ICSI last month. When having my pre-treatment scan, they told me I had PCOS and had probably never ovulated... Funny how the NHS didn't pick up on this and I'd had two similar scans already... Anyways, now on Metformin for the PCOS and ICSI went ahead on May 20th. We're booked in for ET tomorrow morning. Don't want to get my hopes up though...

 

[rottpaw]

Thanks all for the welcome!

I too struggle so much lately with jealousy over others' pregnancies. Recently I learned that the two daughters of a family friend (these people are practically family to me) are BOTH pregnant. Within six months of each other. One with TWINS. And the other showed up the other day at my little sister's wedding shower. It was wonderful to see these friends, but I had a mini-meltdown on my BFF over lunch at just the THOUGHT of having to spend all afternoon with this pregnant family friend. Isn't that sad? I feel terrible and I truly am happy for my friend and her girls (particularly because the friend had, herself tried to have more kids with her husband, but they never succeeded). I think these 3 grandbabies are going to help make that up to my friend, but...it makes me so sad that teenagers (both her girls are under 20) can get pregnant SO easily (and often do not really want to be). And boy, as we age it sure gets harder. I never, ever in a million years expected to have trouble conceiving. Boy, was I in for a surprise!

 

[HappyAuntie]

Rotpaw, I don't know what the actual stats are on the topic, but I have a good friend who had an HSG that showed nothing wrong and she got her BFP the first cycle after her HSG.

I had my HSG just two weeks ago (which was all clear), but we're still waiting on one more lab result so we didn't get the green light to TTC yet, so I won't be able to add my personal experience to the anecdotal evidence!

 

[rottpaw]

Thanks HappyAuntie! I am definitely hopeful because my dr said something like 40% of people get a BFP in the first three months after an HSG (assuming normal hsg and other results). The theory appears to be it can clear small "roadblocks" in the tubes that may have been causing issues. So here's hoping anyway lol!!

 

[vickyd]

Can I tag along? I'm 36 and DH is 40. We've been TTC for 3 and a half years now... we did all the usual investigations and found out DH had a low SC. They finally signed our referral forms back in February but then refused funding, saying I was too old, we hadn't been trying long enough and DH's condition wasn't that serious and we could still get a natural BFP. We decided to go private in March and started IVF/ICSI last month. When having my pre-treatment scan, they told me I had PCOS and had probably never ovulated... Funny how the NHS didn't pick up on this and I'd had two similar scans already... Anyways, now on Metformin for the PCOS and ICSI went ahead on May 20th. We're booked in for ET tomorrow morning. Don't want to get my hopes up though...

Welcome tickle!! Sorry but they told you youre too old at 36????? say what??
National health services suck but come on, how cluless were they that they couldnt see you have pcos??? Anyhoo glad to see youre taking matters in your own hands...Good luck tomorrow, and personally i dont think its so bad to get our hopes up now and then

 

[twinkle1975]

A little ray of sunshine!! I was feeling really crappy + have just discovered that I can bnb from my blackberry! Yay now I can keep up with posts everywhere!

 

[heart tree]

Vicks, when I said a years time, I meant in one year, we'll all have our babies or they'll be in the womb! Sorry for the confusion.

Rott, it is totally NOT sad that you didn't want to spend time with pregnant women for an afternoon. That sounds absolutely horrific to me. I recently had to spend a week with my husband's family and one of them was 8 months pregnant. Everyone kept rubbing her belly. I told my husband he better not dare touch her stomach! The only pregnant belly he'll be rubbing is mine! I have had to spend other afternoons with pregnant women and always come home and have a good cry.

Tickle, things sound really promising now that you are getting proper care. Can't wait to hear how it goes for you!

Twinkle, LOL at your ray of sunshine!!! I seriously have been toying with getting an apple iphone specifically so I can check in with B&B! You know that we both have a sure sign of addiction when that is the ray of light! I'll admit it. My name is heart tree and I'm addicted to B&B!

 

[caroleb73]

Morning Ladies

Welcome to all new to our group, I hope you will find it as helpful as I have since joining only a few days ago. I really find that this group helps to keep me sane when I am feeling very emotional and feel alone.

For all of you that feel jealously towards friends when you hear their pregnancy news I think it is so normal for women in our situation. 4 out of 5 of my closest friends are pregnant right now along with my sister and sister in-law and I have to admit it just makes me feel so much worse. I feel inadequate because I cannot seem to get pregnant no matter what. I am healthy, exercise and eat well. I rarely drink yet some of my friends still party hard have forgotten what the gym looks like and it all happened so easily and quickly for them. I have feelings of why them and not me and then hate myself for feeling that way. It is a vicious circle.

It is not easy for us and we are gonna have to fight every step of the way to get our gorgeous babies. But you know in the end we will be the best parents ever as we will really know just how precious that little life is and how hard we thought to make it happen.

There is no reasoning for why we are the ones going through this but what we can do is support each other on the bad days and celebrate on the good ones. The days when each of us get our BFP and ultimately gives birth to beautiful healthy babies.

We are in this together and you guys are the only ones who really understand how each of us feel because unless you are having difficulty TTC and over 35 then friends and family really cannot truly know how painful it is. The pressure on us is even greater than people younger than us as everyone expects us to have babies by now and we are always reminded of that hideous thing the biological clock.

I am thankful for all of you being here on this thread and supporting us all and praying for our BFP to come very soon.

 

[twinkle1975]

Hello Ladies,

I'm off for a day 18 blood test this morning but just thought I'd stop by & send you all big wish you all a happy day (its 9.30 am with me) and blow some baby dust your way
Twinkle xxxxx

 

[vickyd]

Good luck twinkle, let us know how it goes!

Carole, very insightful post, cheers for that!

Hope everyone has a great day, its the best day of the week for me so i plan on making the best of it!

 

[caroleb73]

Twinkle sending heaps of good lucky your way, will be thinking of you

For me in the Middle East today is our weekend and I am going to go and do something nice to occupy my day so I don't go completely crazy on the TWW, 10 days to go yet it feels like eternity.

Wishing you all a great day and a fab weekend

 

[rottpaw]

Thanks to all for sharing insights and support! I am loving this board already. Everyone have a wonderful Friday! I am thinking baby thoughts for all of us! Hugs ladies!

 

[MrsJ08]

Ladies, I hope you don't mind me popping into your forum but as a lady of 35 I wanted to give you all some moral support and some hope. Most importantly I wanted to sprinkle lots of on your thread. Try and stay positive and don't believe everything you read in the paper's or on-line about fertility. I'm positive that a lot of what you read is nonsense and scaremongering because they can't think of anything else to write. I can honestly say that every time I have been to the hospital I have hardly seen anyone under the age of 30. Anyway enough from me because I appreciate I may not be entirely welcome, but I want to wish you all the best of luck xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[twinkle1975]

MrsJ08 - for my part anyone who comes sprinkling baby dust & bearing hope is welcome!!

 

[rottpaw]

You are certainly welcome here and congratulations on your pregnancy!

 

[doogie1970]

Hi Sydneyb. Reading your message I now dont feel so alone. I like you get so frustrated at my oh as sometimes I dont think he realises that I am getting older and my body clock is ticking away fast and with each second I have even less of a chance to conceive. I am even finding it hard to be around my nieces at times as I am so broody, although I love them to bits I cant help mut feel a bit resentful that my sisters have managed it on more than one occassion. Just feel like such a failure.

 

[vickyd]

ladies, i hope you don't mind me popping into your forum but as a lady of 35 i wanted to give you all some moral support and some hope. Most importantly i wanted to sprinkle lots of On your thread. Try and stay positive and don't believe everything you read in the paper's or on-line about fertility. I'm positive that a lot of what you read is nonsense and scaremongering because they can't think of anything else to write. I can honestly say that every time i have been to the hospital i have hardly seen anyone under the age of 30. Anyway enough from me because i appreciate i may not be entirely welcome, but i want to wish you all the best of luck xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

sprinkle some on meeeeeee!!!!!!

 

[twinkle1975]

Ok, so today I'm facing the opposite of my normal problem - I'm going out for dinner with my best friend - her & husband can't have children & her husband has decided he doesn't want to do any of the things that would be required to fix it - I know she's desperate for children so I'm going to have to bite my tongue & not mention ttc at all - hard when its the main thing on my mind! So I'm going to be just how I want people with hundreds of kids to be with me - sensitive (hopefully!)

 

[vickyd]

Twinkle i went through almost the exact same situation last week. I met up with an old friend and her hubby, they didnt know about my losses and after i told them i made a joke about it (like i always do!) and said "i suck at baby making". They simultaneously (sp) say "well we cant have kids so youre better at it then us" it was akward...I too tried my best to steer clear of the ttc subject.

 

[nikkinurse]

Just wanted to say Hi to everyone

What a fab thread!

I'm Nikki, 35, married to iain ,40. TTC our first baby together. I had an ectopic 5yrs ago and lost my right tube. Have had all the test, HSG etc etc left tube fine thank God.

Hubby A OK too!

Baby Dust to us all!!