TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[Omi]

Im sooo jealous of you being in Greece (apart from all the negative press of credit crunch etc etc.) Ive never been but id lurve to go, looks beautiful.... and good food, and wine, and culture and sun... sigh!

My dh has a demanding dayjob and his own business and so i can totally relate to the probs of sometimes getting the bd on the right time. But i think we're both on the same page now and want this more than anything so at least i now know that if it aint happening he's as crestfallen as i am and i don't make an issue of it as hey, if the shoe was on the other foot, you know....

I can also relate to the mc issue. had 2 and 2 d&c's. Ive done well, but i wont lie that at times Ive been quite bitter about the lot Ive been handed - but, it is what it is and its not the end of the world. if you look hard enough plenty of so called lucky pg/ family people have their own issues which i wouldn't wanna trade.

There's this very nice girl at work. She's 24 and was due to finnish her social care work degree at college this spring. She fell accidentally pg in Sept with her bf and did admit it was quite a shock. She has now had to put her professional life on hold.

I like to put things in perspective for my own ends so what im gonna say next is no criticism of others honest! But i thought, she's so young, and now she's gonna be tied to this guy for the rest of her life.

Ive been there done that. Everything. I would have loved to have kids earlier had a met the right man.But i didn't. But im glad that i don't have anything undone, i have picked the man for me - we picked each other - and i feel blessed for the things i have even though i don't have what others take for granted.

I guess i sometimes like to count my blessings..

Allt the best, hun!!

Omi xxxxx

 

[serendippy]

Im a well old oldie lol..im 43 and trying for first. Been trying for nearly a year and not even a sniff of a BFP. U gotta remain positive cos thats all u can do really.

Good luck to all xxxxx

 

[vickyd]

Yeah i had a couple of friends wonder why i dont go straight for IVF LOl!! They are clueless man...They think that if you have IVF nothing can go wrong, no miscarriage, no trisomy or other complications and wow ill have twins as well!!1 sometime i have to control myself from getting violent!!!

 

[vickyd]

Im sooo jealous of you being in Greece (apart from all the negative press of credit crunch etc etc.) Ive never been but id lurve to go, looks beautiful.... and good food, and wine, and culture and sun... sigh!

My dh has a demanding dayjob and his own business and so i can totally relate to the probs of sometimes getting the bd on the right time. But i think we're both on the same page now and want this more than anything so at least i now know that if it aint happening he's as crestfallen as i am and i don't make an issue of it as hey, if the shoe was on the other foot, you know....

Its difficult at the moment in greece youre right....We are all trying to keep our buisnesses afloat this year and waiting for things to start looking up. On the bright side though its a good time for a holiday in greece since the hotels and restaurants are lowering their prices this year by at least 20%, and there are definately vacancies everywhere so you dont have to settle for a shitty room in the middle of nowhere!!!

 

[jomax]

Welcome syd :wave:. I had a d&e at 9 weeks. At 7 weeks there was no heartbeat and at 8 weeks my ob started to think the worst. I was devastated and an emotional mess for many months after. Then I followed with a chemical pregnancy. I feel so self-conscious sometimes and I HATE it when people say things like "Having kids isn't as great as you think it is" or telling me I need to go to a fertility specialist even after I tell them that my ob thinks differently. 2 friends of mine are set to deliver next month and it just kills me. So I say to you rant away! We all hear you.


Vicky - my husband has never been to Greece and those islands sound lovely. He wants to go to the islands but not before Athens since he's so into history. I need a break right now. I have a fertility monitor so I know when I ovulate but it's still stressful. I don't tell my husband I'm ovulating because at least one of us should be having fun and not look at this in terms of cycle days, high and peak fertility, etc People tell you to relax and it will happen but it's hard to do that. And I know that it won't end if I get pregnant since I'll always remember that I m/c'd.

Maxxi when you say you don't tell your OH that your OV so he can still have fun can i ask (if you don't mind) what do you do if he says no? (if he does?). i've tried this technique with my OH but sometimes he says he's too tired and then i can't bear the thought of not BD'ing so i end up saying its a good time and sort of spoiling the moment. it's so frustrating.....

 

[Omi]

Hmm... I must spread the word about cheaper Greece hols, then!

 

[heart tree]

Hello ladies! So glad we have a place of our own. I know a few of you and am excited to get to know all of you. I'm 35 and have had 2 mcs like many of you other ladies. One was at 10 weeks due to a blood clot in my uterus. The other was at 6 weeks for reasons unknown. They thought it was a molar pregnancy, but thank god it wasn't. My DH is 41. We are soooo ready for our baby!

Like Vicky, I'm technically in the 2ww right now too, but AF is on her way I can just tell.

Jomax, I also don't tell my DH that I'm Ov'ing. If he says no, I have to respect his right to do so. I used to get really upset, but that has never helped matters. Usually though, I try to set the mood so he won't say no. I try to have a clean house and bedroom (clutter can cause unconscious stress), have a bottle of wine ready, some good food or at least a plan for dinner ready. At this point if he hasn't caught on that I'm ovulating when the house is clean and dinner is ready, then he's a little thick! LOL! Our plan for next cycle is to BD every other day starting on CD12. I'm going to track ovulation (and not tell him) and once I've ovulated, I'll tell him we don't have to keep doing it. He's game for the plan. We've decided to start taking walks after work and then not turn on the television on our BD days. Basically, we're just trying to connect a little more. Knowing that we're definitely going to BD every other day alleviates any pressure for either of us. It sounds good in theory! Hope it works in practice.

 

[maxxiandniko]

Welcome syd :wave:. I had a d&e at 9 weeks. At 7 weeks there was no heartbeat and at 8 weeks my ob started to think the worst. I was devastated and an emotional mess for many months after. Then I followed with a chemical pregnancy. I feel so self-conscious sometimes and I HATE it when people say things like "Having kids isn't as great as you think it is" or telling me I need to go to a fertility specialist even after I tell them that my ob thinks differently. 2 friends of mine are set to deliver next month and it just kills me. So I say to you rant away! We all hear you.


Vicky - my husband has never been to Greece and those islands sound lovely. He wants to go to the islands but not before Athens since he's so into history. I need a break right now. I have a fertility monitor so I know when I ovulate but it's still stressful. I don't tell my husband I'm ovulating because at least one of us should be having fun and not look at this in terms of cycle days, high and peak fertility, etc People tell you to relax and it will happen but it's hard to do that. And I know that it won't end if I get pregnant since I'll always remember that I m/c'd.

Maxxi when you say you don't tell your OH that your OV so he can still have fun can i ask (if you don't mind) what do you do if he says no? (if he does?). i've tried this technique with my OH but sometimes he says he's too tired and then i can't bear the thought of not BD'ing so i end up saying its a good time and sort of spoiling the moment. it's so frustrating.....

He doesn't say no often and if I have any thought he may I start tickling him and won't let him sleep. He works 8 -6 ish and something tells me your OH is working a more physically demanding job. I'd tell him if I had to though. The way I see it is that I've ruined so many moments because of being in such a bad mood because of the 2 mc's that telling him I'm O'ing wouldn't be any worse than all the difficult moments we've had in the past months.

 

[padbrat]

Hello ladies... I know so many of you already...

Kelster... my hug mate. Omi... every the practical realist who helps kick me up the ass and Heart.... who somehow always says just the right thing....

So nice to see all you other ladies too.... and I am hoping that we will all move to 1st tri and end up with wiggling healthy babies soon....

I am 38, Hubby is 37 and we have had 3 m/c from Feb 07 to May 10 and have lost 4 babies... At the mo bding is on hold as I have to wait to see the recurrent m/c specialist on 1 July (Boo Hoo)...though in preparation I have hubby and me on his and hers preconcieve... better bloody work LOL!!!

Speak to you all soon xx

 

[heart tree]

Hi Padbrat! I knew we'd get together in a forum we could call home! I'm so happy your appointment is coming up soon. Only 10 more days. Please let us know how it goes luv.

 

[caroleb73]

Hey Everyone,

I am 37 and my hubby is 27, we have been TTC baby #1 for 1 year now. I have been finding it really hard lately when AF comes each month. We have just been through fertility testing as we are now put into the catergory of "infertility" but the tests all came back ok and show no apparent problems.

Doc has said she wanted to give us a helping hand and gave me an injection to control the timing of my ovulation this month (i am ovulating every month and always on the same day of the cycle) and now taking Duphaston for the last 2 weeks of my cycle. She says that if we are lucky enough for the egg to be fertilized then this will help it stick. If not then she wants to try Clomid as first port of call.

Hoping that this works as really do not want to start on long term fertility drugs if we can help it.

Guess I never thought something as natural as having a baby would be so difficult. Saying that I am hopeful that we will all get our gorgeous little babies in the end we just have to hang in there and be prepared that our route to having a baby maybe a little different from others.

Wishing you all the best and hope that we all have great news to share soon x x

 

[vickyd]

Welcome Carol!

Looking back i remember thinking, ill go to Uni then grad school then ill get a good job then ill wait for a few years before ttc so as to secure my job and at 33 i will have my baby!!!!!LOL!!!! It seemed soooo easy in my head....
I like to think that this difficult path were on will only make us more appreciative of our family once its completed and that we will better parents for sure!

 

[lola13]

Hi Girls - I'm with you, too. We've been TTC #1 since March 2007 with no luck whatsoever. We've had all tests which show all plumbing & hormones are working just fine. I hate being unexplained!!

Keeping fingers crossed for this month as I've done clomid plus IUI. I figure this is my best chance, yet.

 

[vickyd]

Lola I really hope this is your month doll!!!! Lets hope this new forum will bring all of us tons of luck!!!

 

[Adela Quested]

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to pop in to wish everyone heaps of . I am 37 and expecting my first in about a month. I was 36 when I conceived and we were lucky enough that it happened straight away - first cycle TTC! I tell you this of course not to show off but to give you all hope that being over the magic age of 35 doesn't automatically mean that you will have problems.

The oldest woman in my pregnancy class is 42 and also having her first child. I didn't ask her how she conceived (none of my business!) but I think it's good for us to keep in mind that it happens all the time.

Wishing you all the luck in the world

 

[caroleb73]

Vicky I completely agree that we will all be super parents when our turn comes and I am sure it will happen for us. I see that you live in Greece away from home so like me as my husband and I are in Bahrain in the Middle East. Hospitals are fantastic here but miss not having life long friends and my Mum close by in a time like this.

Lola I have everything crossed that we will be hearing good news from you soon

 

[jomax]

Welcome Carol!

Looking back i remember thinking, ill go to Uni then grad school then ill get a good job then ill wait for a few years before ttc so as to secure my job and at 33 i will have my baby!!!!!LOL!!!! It seemed soooo easy in my head....
I like to think that this difficult path were on will only make us more appreciative of our family once its completed and that we will better parents for sure!

VickyD this was my life plan too except i was having one at 30 and another at 32! Hasn't worked out that way and although i am happy with everything else, i'm so ready for kids .

 

[vickyd]

Vicky I completely agree that we will all be super parents when our turn comes and I am sure it will happen for us. I see that you live in Greece away from home so like me as my husband and I are in Bahrain in the Middle East. Hospitals are fantastic here but miss not having life long friends and my Mum close by in a time like this.

Lola I have everything crossed that we will be hearing good news from you soon

Carole, actually i am greek! I just have moved alot over the years: Canada, UK and now ive been back home for about 7 years and planning on staying for good! I really missed my family and friends when i was abroad as well, and now with the ttc i couldnt imagine having to go through it only with dh.

 

[LoopyLou4444]

Hello everyone, I'm very new to this, I only joined yesterday and I'm not sure if I'm doing this right or about all the abbreviations!!

As much as I hate to see you all on here as I would love for you all to be pregnant I suddenly don't feel so alone. I'm 37 and my partner and I have been trying for a baby since August 2008, I had a miscarriage at the beginning of February 2010. As heart breaking as it was I try to stay positive and remember if it can happen once it can happen again. We have just been through fertility tests and should be referred to a fertiliy clinic soon I hope.

I wish you all well. (I hope that I can post this without it being lost to the ether!!)

 

[vermeil]

Hello! Just wanted to send positive vibes your way. I was 37 when we started trying (dh is 27) and it took seven months. My (much younger) friends took two years to conceive. Keep positive it will happen!

Of course my little darling decided he was in a hurry and arrived 3 months early But it`s due to other medical factors, not age.

All the best to all of you ladies!