TTC 1st child 35+ (Please spoiler any PG news/announcements).

[padbrat]

Am still holding out Purps.. will not test until Thurs... so am currently on CD 36... and nothing... nothing at all.

Well I say nothing... had a whole episode of 'dampness'... thought maybe I was having the same issue as your dog Purps... but no.. is a whole load of watery stuff. Doesn't smell or anything. Never had that before... maybe it is an old lady thing and AF is just waiting to jump me!

Hows the hurricane going Lils? A little wet and windy maybe? LOL .... was going to make a comparison joke with me there... but thought no that is just TMI!! LMAO x

Hello hello hello all x

 

[Dwrgi]

Am still holding out Purps.. will not test until Thurs... so am currently on CD 36... and nothing... nothing at all.

Well I say nothing... had a whole episode of 'dampness'... thought maybe I was having the same issue as your dog Purps... but no.. is a whole load of watery stuff. Doesn't smell or anything. Never had that before... maybe it is an old lady thing and AF is just waiting to jump me!

Hows the hurricane going Lils? A little wet and windy maybe? LOL .... was going to make a comparison joke with me there... but thought no that is just TMI!! LMAO x

Hello hello hello all x

You are a monkey, Padster!!!! Hope you had a great weekend, and fingers crossed that this is a GOOD sign!!

Lils-huge and stay safe, Axxxx

Purple, Dashka, Chicken, Lady H, BF, and everybody else on her-big to you all!

I'm struggling at the moment with what to do. I feel that my success with natural and AC with own eggs has got me nowhere, and I can't keep tormenting myself with which vits to take, treatments to have. Been there, worn the t-shirt, yada yada, and still no BFP. So, I'm going to wean myself off the thread, although I'll still keep an eye out for everyone and really hope tht we all get our BFPs one way or another. I don't know if I can put myself through a DE scenario. Perhaps I'll just leave it to chance and if it wasn't meant to be, then that's that. I never thought I could say this, but after almost five years and a lot of emotional and physical effort, I think I'm done. (Although it does upset me to say it). I may change my mind, who knows, perhaps I just need a complete break from it all, but for now, this is what I want to do, as I just can't see any way that I can 'win'! So, I'll pop in an see how you're all doing, but for my own sanity, this is what I need to do. Sorry girls, and huge GOOD LUCK to you all, Axxxx

 

[drhouse]

oh miss amanda... we will miss you... we all get it.. you are the most wonderful and deserving woman..... and it's been a really long journey for you. I want to wish you all the best and give you the biggest and best virtual hug ever. Maybe moving on with everything else will give you the space to heal a bit. but god we will miss you.

Dash/Lils - pleased to hear that the worse of issac has .......be safe.... especially on the roads.....

Pad - you may be pinkly positive - I will cross my fingers for you!!!

Greekprn- thanks for the coq10 discussion - I'm only on 150mg a day - so am going to increase to 375mg. I puked after taking the coq10 and horse pill elevit the other day - must have got the tablets stuck - oh for morning sickness but none here.....

Moon - will join you in the green tea - black coffee isn't fab

I'm lurking at the mo (like you lady H) - am struggling a bit too - in fact the two week wait hell this month has been the most crap. I get excited about nothing.... convinced my self that tingly feet over the weekend was an early sign of pregnancy - drawing AT STRAWS/delusional!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! excitement comes before a huge fat bFN.

just quit one of my two jobs - to concentrate on bfp. god hope this works. hung out with nephew and four year olds at party over the weekend - don't the words, which one is yours? really suck/bollocks!!!!!
of course - the other mothers are such smug married, smug mums... AAAGGGHHHHHHHH.

remind ourselves - that while they are pregnant and being mothers we are getting fabulous.

 

[padbrat]

Completely understand where you are coming from A. Its just too draining on the soul. As you all know I have to take regular AWOL seshs just to cope.

Loves to you A! xxxx

Hahhahaa DrH! You are so funny... tingly feet.. that is a new sign!!

Though is all seriousness I desperately need a medical opinon!!

Have just got my result from the Drs for my tests.... NOT GOOD... Scarily not good...

Thyroid:
TSH 0.05
T4 51.1
T3 22.2

Glucose
6.5

Progesterone (21 day)
21

So that means in the last year where my meds have dropped from 150mg to 25mg my T4 has dropped 0.9.....Have been reading up and am scaring myself to death over this... it is so bad for fertility and pregnancy... can cause cognitive disabilities.... OMG I really hope I am not pregnant as it will mean my 7th loss....

The bloody nurse just said... oh well the Dr spoke to you and told you to drop your meds to 25mg. If you aren't happy with that come in and talk to a Dr..... OMG they have been playing with this for a year now and still not fixed it!!

I am scared...

 

[drhouse]

Completely understand where you are coming from A. Its just too draining on the soul. As you all know I have to take regular AWOL seshs just to cope.

Loves to you A! xxxx

Hahhahaa DrH! You are so funny... tingly feet.. that is a new sign!!

Though is all seriousness I desperately need a medical opinon!!

Have just got my result from the Drs for my tests.... NOT GOOD... Scarily not good...

Thyroid:
TSH 0.05
T4 51.1
T3 22.2

Glucose
6.5

Progesterone (21 day)
21

So that means in the last year where my meds have dropped from 150mg to 25mg my T4 has dropped 0.9.....Have been reading up and am scaring myself to death over this... it is so bad for fertility and pregnancy... can cause cognitive disabilities.... OMG I really hope I am not pregnant as it will mean my 7th loss....

The bloody nurse just said... oh well the Dr spoke to you and told you to drop your meds to 25mg. If you aren't happy with that come in and talk to a Dr..... OMG they have been playing with this for a year now and still not fixed it!!

I am scared...

Pad what units are the tests in where you are?

 

[drhouse]

Normal ranges in UK I think are:

TSH 0.1-6.0 miu/L
free T4 10-25 pmol/L
total T3 1.0-2.5 nmol/L

 

[padbrat]

I have no idea DrH... they never bother to tell you these things....

What do you think?

 

[padbrat]

Have just read this...

Complications[1][3]

Poorly controlled hyperthyroidism during pregnancy is associated with the following:

Maternal
Pregnancy-induced hypertension.[7]
Pre-eclampsia.
Cardiac failure.
Premature labour.[7]
Thyroid storm.
Placental abruption.
Fetal/neonatal
High miscarriage rate is associated with high thyroid hormone and thyrotrophin hormone levels (ie not due to autoimmunity).
Intrauterine growth ******ation.[7]
Low birthweight baby.[7]
Stillbirth.
Thyroid dysfunction.
in https://www.patient.co.uk/doctor/Hyperthyroidism-in-Pregnancy.htm

OMG OMGGGG

Even worse....

In women who are not pregnant, hyperthyroidism can affect menstrual periods, making them irregular, lighter, or disappear altogether. It may be harder for hyperthyroid women to become pregnant, and they are more likely to have miscarriages. If a woman with infertility or repeated miscarriages has symptoms of hyperthyroidism, it is important to rule out this condition with thyroid blood tests. It is very important that hyperthyroidism be controlled in pregnant women since the risks of miscarriage or birth defects are much higher without therapy.

https://www.endocrineweb.com/condit...blems-pregnancy#Hyperthyroidism_and_Pregnancy

This is getting worse... am scared...

 

[grkprn]

I have no idea DrH... they never bother to tell you these things....

What do you think?

pad - I had two decades of issues with my thyroid. I work in a cardiac unit, so I found the normal ranges for our hospital:

TSH 0.30-5.50 miu/L
free T4 0.76-1.70 ng/dL
total T3 100-200 ng/dL

I was weaned off of synthroid in March '09, due to tachycardia and excessive sweating. The symptoms resolved and I still get my levels checked yearly.

I found this website online - https://www.tpa-uk.org.uk/standard_tests_for_thyroid_disease1.php - it looks like it is a thyroid patient advocacy page in the UK. It lists the normal ranges for TSH, T4 and T3 in the appropriate units.

Don't read too much online or else it would drive you bonkers! Personally, I would contact the Dr's office and make an appt. to see him/her in the office. I find that discussing issues face to face, rather than through a 3rd party, helps a ton.

Let me know if you would like any additional information -- I've read my share about thyroid issues and fertility/pregnancy!!

 

[LilSluz]

I'm struggling at the moment with what to do. I feel that my success with natural and AC with own eggs has got me nowhere, and I can't keep tormenting myself with which vits to take, treatments to have. Been there, worn the t-shirt, yada yada, and still no BFP. So, I'm going to wean myself off the thread, although I'll still keep an eye out for everyone and really hope tht we all get our BFPs one way or another. I don't know if I can put myself through a DE scenario. Perhaps I'll just leave it to chance and if it wasn't meant to be, then that's that. I never thought I could say this, but after almost five years and a lot of emotional and physical effort, I think I'm done. (Although it does upset me to say it). I may change my mind, who knows, perhaps I just need a complete break from it all, but for now, this is what I want to do, as I just can't see any way that I can 'win'! So, I'll pop in an see how you're all doing, but for my own sanity, this is what I need to do. Sorry girls, and huge GOOD LUCK to you all, Axxxx

Oh Dwrgi I was just popping on quickly for now & saw your post. I am so sad for you!!! I am also selfishly sad for myself because I am going to miss you so much!!! I know we'll stay in touch by other means, but... it's not the same. But I completely sympathize with how you feel & have seen it coming & I don't blame you one bit. Its so exhausting & you've been doing this for soooo long.

People don't realize that LTTC (& espec >35) is a daily struggle - not just at O time & AF! Like you said - the supplements, the drugs, the staying away from things you love (or taking them in moderation which pretty much sux too) because you are so fearful of causing something bad to happen, the Dr appts, scans, tests, surgeries, shooting yourself up w/drugs & then the ART on top of that. LTTC saps your mind, body & spirit after a while. Even if you consider yourself "relaxed" about it, subconsciously something has to be going on & it'll come out in one way or another. It causes you to put your life on hold for a "what-if" scenario & that's the worst, I think. So, that's my way of saying I totally understand & although I want you to stay forever & ever, I do realize that your departure would probably be what's best for Dwrgi & that's what is most important right now.

But I will also keep my positive thoughts & prayers coming whether you are on this thread or not. And I will secretly hope that you will get that lucky taking-a-break or quitting-TTC-altogether sticky rainbow bean. If hope, hard work, patience & helping others could just manifest itself physically, you'd have 5 kids by now - really. You've been a blessing to me & have helped me through so much, and I know that I am not alone. :sad: You have helped so many women through this, so I hope you know it wasn't all for nothing or wasted time because you have been there for so many of us & we appreciate it more than you probably know. I know that doesn't get you pregnant, but hopefully you will give yourself a ton of love & acceptance for what you have selflessly given to us.

Sorry I am getting emotional, but you've helped me since the day & joined this thread (which seems like years ago) & I'm really going to miss you!!!

 

[purplelou]

Am still holding out Purps.. will not test until Thurs... so am currently on CD 36... and nothing... nothing at all.

Well I say nothing... had a whole episode of 'dampness'... thought maybe I was having the same issue as your dog Purps... but no.. is a whole load of watery stuff. Doesn't smell or anything. Never had that before... maybe it is an old lady thing and AF is just waiting to jump me!

Hows the hurricane going Lils? A little wet and windy maybe? LOL .... was going to make a comparison joke with me there... but thought no that is just TMI!! LMAO x

Hello hello hello all x

You are a monkey, Padster!!!! Hope you had a great weekend, and fingers crossed that this is a GOOD sign!!

Lils-huge and stay safe, Axxxx

Purple, Dashka, Chicken, Lady H, BF, and everybody else on her-big to you all!

I'm struggling at the moment with what to do. I feel that my success with natural and AC with own eggs has got me nowhere, and I can't keep tormenting myself with which vits to take, treatments to have. Been there, worn the t-shirt, yada yada, and still no BFP. So, I'm going to wean myself off the thread, although I'll still keep an eye out for everyone and really hope tht we all get our BFPs one way or another. I don't know if I can put myself through a DE scenario. Perhaps I'll just leave it to chance and if it wasn't meant to be, then that's that. I never thought I could say this, but after almost five years and a lot of emotional and physical effort, I think I'm done. (Although it does upset me to say it). I may change my mind, who knows, perhaps I just need a complete break from it all, but for now, this is what I want to do, as I just can't see any way that I can 'win'! So, I'll pop in an see how you're all doing, but for my own sanity, this is what I need to do. Sorry girls, and huge GOOD LUCK to you all, Axxxx

I am sooooo sad to read this! But...... I do understand, and you have to make yourself the most important person now! I will miss you here so much, you have always been so lovely and helped me (and others ) when I have been down and sad. I wish I could make it happen for you! You deserve it.
Huge loves xxx

 

[grkprn]

I'm struggling at the moment with what to do. I feel that my success with natural and AC with own eggs has got me nowhere, and I can't keep tormenting myself with which vits to take, treatments to have. Been there, worn the t-shirt, yada yada, and still no BFP. So, I'm going to wean myself off the thread, although I'll still keep an eye out for everyone and really hope tht we all get our BFPs one way or another. I don't know if I can put myself through a DE scenario. Perhaps I'll just leave it to chance and if it wasn't meant to be, then that's that. I never thought I could say this, but after almost five years and a lot of emotional and physical effort, I think I'm done. (Although it does upset me to say it). I may change my mind, who knows, perhaps I just need a complete break from it all, but for now, this is what I want to do, as I just can't see any way that I can 'win'! So, I'll pop in an see how you're all doing, but for my own sanity, this is what I need to do. Sorry girls, and huge GOOD LUCK to you all, Axxxx

Dwrgi - I'm so sad You have helped me with positive energy and comments....but I understand the stress TTC has on us. I took a break (albeit only a month) and it helped me step away from BNB and relax. I'm back now, but I'm not sure how long I could last on a message board continually month after month. Even though all of the ladies here are wonderful!

Wishing you all the best and sending prayers your way -- please keep in touch and keep lurking! So you can see when we all head to Jamaica!!

 

[tigerlily1975]

I'm struggling at the moment with what to do. I feel that my success with natural and AC with own eggs has got me nowhere, and I can't keep tormenting myself with which vits to take, treatments to have. Been there, worn the t-shirt, yada yada, and still no BFP. So, I'm going to wean myself off the thread, although I'll still keep an eye out for everyone and really hope tht we all get our BFPs one way or another. I don't know if I can put myself through a DE scenario. Perhaps I'll just leave it to chance and if it wasn't meant to be, then that's that. I never thought I could say this, but after almost five years and a lot of emotional and physical effort, I think I'm done. (Although it does upset me to say it). I may change my mind, who knows, perhaps I just need a complete break from it all, but for now, this is what I want to do, as I just can't see any way that I can 'win'! So, I'll pop in an see how you're all doing, but for my own sanity, this is what I need to do. Sorry girls, and huge GOOD LUCK to you all, Axxxx

Oh, darling, I'm so sorry to read this I don't want to see you go, but completely understand your reasons why. It takes a lot of strength to keep going on this journey, but it takes even more strength to walk away. You are an amazing woman, I really hope you know that. You've been a rock to all of us.. I honestly wouldn't have got through any of this, especially this cycle, without all your help and support. I hope the break brings you peace and clarity and if there were any justice the little 'surprise' you so richly deserve.

Sending you tonnes of love, and

C xx

 

[purplelou]

Pad... That is scary stuff! I think you definitely need to speak to your doctor .

Big hugs xxx

 

[Butterfly67]

A, you know my thoughts but just wanted to say (well, what LilS said really but not so well )

You have been a massive source of strength, inspiration and knowledge on here and like everyone said if wishes made then you would have a whole brood from us lot right now. So massive and some but catch up with you soon lovely lady

 

[dashka]

just quickly passing by today but...

Dwrgi - I am sooooo sad too to read this I so understand your need to go off the thread - but we will miss you terribly... You have helped me and others - picked us up when we were down and you SOOOOO deserve this hun... I wish I could make this happen for you... Take all the time you need to heal and become your old-self again (I have been comtemplating this too) This LTTC thing is soul-sucking... literally rips out your heart and stomps on it month after month.... Life is sooo freakin' unfair and I was actually crying and cursing in the car this morning about the very same thing and said I can't do this anymore. It totally sucks that we are punished for wanting the one thing in life that would make us happy ... I will SOOO miss you but know we will keep in touch by other means - .....

Take care hun.... you are one beautiful person and I so hope you get your surprise rainbow baby ....

 

[dashka]

Pad - I really hope your new doc can help with the thyroid issues - that sounds scary - but please stop Googling - it's so dangerous.. (re: the 'wetness' thing - that happened to me one cycle when I was a day or two late and it only lasted for a day or two before AF showed her ugly face).... How many days have you had that 'wetness' going on?

Hello to everyone else - sending everyone -

AFM - was feeling pretty sad this morning (even before I read Dwrgi's post) -just don't know how much more of this I can take of TTC (or whether I can handle it) Too stressed right now.... Then I got an email from an old boss who is asking if I would want to come in for an interview for a job opening there - have been dying to leave here for a while -but been putting everything on hold for TTC... now I have my RE app't on Tuesday and if I go for this job (which I haven't even gone for the interview for yet) then will my IVF plans be put on hold.... this timing totally sucks - why don't things happen when you want them too... Murphy's law. Moving to another job would mean it would make it much harder for me to get the time off to get IVF done or whatever... so that may have to be put on hold... oh crap... so confused!

 

[chickenchaser]

Dwrgi, Honey nothing I say is going to make you feel any better. But wanted you to know you have been such a support to me and welcomed me onto the thread with open arms. I really hope that you will become the good old 'once she gave up having a baby she got pregnant'. All I can do now though is send you my rainbow and shooting star and hope it brings you your baby. (I will catch the next one) Love to you and don't be a stranger but give yourself time XXX You will be missed XXX

 

[chickenchaser]

dashka - Hugs to you too. You could always go for the job anyway and see what happens, you never know it may all just click into place. I'm a great believer in everything happens for a reason.

 

[Lady H]

Dwrgi....I came out of hiding to send you all my love. The others all said it so I'll leave you with a n