TTC After A Loss... Race for the BFP! - 211 BFP's!!!

[Razcox]

Sun so sorry it didnt work out xxxx

Morning all how is everyone else??

I think i am OVing so the bleeding may have been because of this, going to BD anyway and give it a shot. Just need to get DH interested as last night he was 'too tired' why is it they are always tired around OV??

 

[Megg33k]

Sorry, SunShyn! Hope you get it figured out, honey!

 

[padbrat]

Hey Megg... how you doing today?

Have just purchased Pregnacare His and Hers Conception...Vitabiotics are doing 2 for 1 and also used a disc code for another 5% off (VITAMAY5).

I am the bargain queen so thought I would pass the info on to my TTCAL girls

Told hubby he would take pills to help his swimmers... he replied so what is the point until we talk to the consultant in July... he doesn't understand culmative effect... think as soon as he takes the stuff he will have super swimmers

 

[Megg33k]

I'm surviving, padbrat! I'm not great though! Feeling very much like I'm going to be all alone while everyone else is pregnant or has their babies! I just need to know when it'll happen in a way that won't end in heart ache! I'm just tired of hearing that it will happen... no one knows that it will! How are you, love?

 

[padbrat]

Awww Megg I am so much like you. We are moving soon and everyone we know will have just have had a baby or be pregnant.. so while they bounce their bundles of joy I am grieving inside. I am almost petrified of being pregnant again...

It is so hard.

Little steps a day Megg.. surviving is enough for us at this time xx

 

[VGibs]

Megg honey, I just know they will be able to figure out what is going on. I was googling recurrent blighted ovum the other night and saw a lot of good things! Like some people just have to take a medication that prevents it! I don't want to say "it'll happen" cause I know how obnoxious that can be to hear sometimes...so I'll say "You will MAKE it happen baby!"

 

[BizyBee]

Sorry sunshyn.

 

[jonnanne3]

So sorry Sunshyn.
Megg....

 

[shaerichelle]

Sunshyn and Megg

 

[shaerichelle]

Congrats Hb.

 

[Megg33k]

Thanks to you all! I'd be lost without you girls!

 

[fluffyblue]

I'm surviving, padbrat! I'm not great though! Feeling very much like I'm going to be all alone while everyone else is pregnant or has their babies! I just need to know when it'll happen in a way that won't end in heart ache! I'm just tired of hearing that it will happen... no one knows that it will! How are you, love?

Ill still be here with ya hun way my bodies going think ive dried up !

 

[Nixilix]

just hello from me today girls... thinking of you all xxx

 

[Megg33k]

Warning: This will be long and LOTS of cursing! My day was SHIT today!

1. Doc didn't call with blood results. So, I called them at 2pm. I got someone who WASN'T a bitch (Yay!) and she called the lab to have them faxed. She let me stay on hold while she waited for the fax. 30 minutes later... still no fax! So, she took my number and actually DID call me back when the fax came through (Yay!)!! What's the answer? Everything looks normal! I asked for them to fax me a copy of the bloods and she said "We'll do it when we get a chance." which pretty much means NEVER. So, I went in. I talked to someone else and this bitch acted like "Can I get copies of my blood work?" was like me saying "Oh, could you just cut out your kidney and give it to me?" Had the audacity to ask if I'd even understand what it meant. Uhm... Its MY blood work... Why does it matter if I understand it? Just fucking give it to me. She gave me shit for about 15 minutes before finally making the copies and acting like I'd really put her out. BITCH!

2. I asked about a follow up appointment... She says, "Oh, were we supposed to see you again?" OH EM GEE! YES? So, she's passing it all along to the MW who will call to tell me what the next step is. I'll hold my breath on getting that call!

3. Blood results: Hormone # (my result) [range of "normal"]

T4, Free 1.04 [0.60-1.40] NG/DL

TSH 2. 09 [0.34-4.82] uIU/ML

Beta HCG: <1 [0-6] MIU/ML (when not pregnant) - So, its dropped off completely, basically!

Antimicrosomal Antibodies (thyroid): <10 [Reference range = 5 IU/ML]

Progesterone: 0.5 NG/ML [Follicular: 0.2-1.4 NG/ML, Luteal: 3.3-25.6 NG/ML, Midluteal: 4.4-28.0 NG/ML, Pregnant 1st Tri: 11.2-90.0 NG/ML]

T3, Free: 336 [230-420] PG/DL

T3, RIA/T3, Total: 148 [76-181] NG/ML

Vitamin D, 25 Hydroxy/Vitamin D, 25-OH, Total: 18 (low) [20-100] NG/ML
*25-OHD3 indicates both endogenous production and supplementation. 25-OHD2 is an indicator of exogenous sources such as diet or supplementation. Therapy is based on measurement of total 25-OHD, with levels <20 ng/mL indicative of Vitamin D deficiency while levels between 20 ng/mL and 30 ng/mL suggest insufficiency. Optimal levels are >30 ng/mL.

Vitamin D, 25-OH D3 18 NG/ML
Vitamin D, 25-OH D2 <4 NG/ML

So, I'm Vitamin D deficient! More about that below! Based on my Progesterone level having dropped as low as it has now, I started taking Provera this afternoon so I can start bleeding.

4. My husband's car stopped fucking running at a stop light in a not so fab part of town. The battery light came on, so we went directly to Auto Zone to have it checked. They said the battery and alternator were both just fine. Less than 4 hours later, the stereo clock went off, then the dash lights dimmed, then the windows stopped working and then it fucking died! I called Justin in tears begging him to come get me... which he did gladly!

Either way... HORRIBLE FUCKING DAY! I have no clue what's wrong with me. No one seems to think that I need further medical attention... even though she seems very interested in helping! I'm hoping she calls soon and tells me that they just didn't know what they were talking about... and sets something up. Either way, I'm going to get CD3 and 7dpo bloods done this time. Since I don't have a thyroid problem, I'm going to use Soy again unless she puts me on something stronger.

I feel utterly failed again! Hoping she calls with a follow-up appointment time or something. But, she was so sure it would be my thyroid... and its fucking NOT my thyroid! So, not sure what to do now!

About the Vitamin D deficiency:

So, Vitamin D deficiency can cause PCOS, insulin resistance, weight gain or the inability to keep weight off, cancer, osteoporosis, muscle pain, fatigue, depression, mood swings, sleep irregularities, and renal or intestinal problems.

Renal problems are one of the causes of weak urine, btw... So, that might explain a lot. Here's the best part... Optimally, we should have 50-70 ng/mL... I have fucking 18... and she told me it was "ALL NORMAL"?!?! WTF?!

Edit: Just read a study that showed a Vit D deficiency in rats lowered their fertility by 75%, and when they conceived it lowered the viability of the pups, made litters significantly smaller, and hindered the growth of the embryos!

 

[groovygrl]

oh megg... I'm so sorry. there just aren't words. why does this happen? It's soooo unfair I can only imagine your anguish sweetness. And now... frustration with the health care system. I get that you're feeling 'dumped' by them.

thank you for taking the time to write out all your test results and share them with us. I'm going through a similar experience with the medical community here in NZ. I am 40 and I think it's standard in most countries but there is little support and no testing offered (even if I were to suffer multiple miscarraiges.) I finally found a naturopath who offered to do all the blood work you listed in your post. She hand wrote out all the tests she wanted and then asked me to take this 'note' to my doctor who she hoped would type up the lab requisition forms. SO...back to the dr. and she gladly sorted this out. I was incredulous? I mean... she watched me suffer through my last MC and D&C and didn't offer me these tests herself? but she obviously had no prob. putting her name to the lab requisition my naturopath asked for. WTF!!! She did however say that I should ask the lab to send me a copy of results (so that I didn't stalk her practice nurse for them - as they weren't really 'their' labs) she typed up two forms. First was for day 2-3 and included FSH,LH and E2 (estradiol 2) Second form was for Day 21 and included: prog., FBC (including ESR), vit d, iron, ferritin, B12,TSH, lgA and lgE, antinuclear antibodies, cardiolipin antibodies, lupus anticoagulant and finally, thrombophilia studies. We did it this way so I only went to the lab twice, made sense at the time. But... no! I approached day 21 and had that 'hopeful' (but mind playing tricks on me) feeling that I might be pregnant. I phoned my naturopath and asked if it might be an issue to have all this blood taken if preg. she said, "ya, to be on safe side let's just do progesterone for now then." Off to the lab and the silly cow there said, 'can't chop and change the forms dear, it's either as the form quotes (all the tests) or none. She spoke to me and treated me like I was a stupid 15 year old. She instructed me to go back to my dr. and ask her to re-type the forms as individual tests -per page and then I could come and go as I pleased and get the blood work as my mood fancies on the day. Fancies? I was so clode to launching into a full no holds barred description of 'my mood'.AAAARGH! And round and round I go.So angry. Why does this have to be so hard. I just want one person with intelligence, compassion and common sense to help me.

This is such a difficult process kitten! If i had millions of $ I would set up a clinic for women who have suffered MC's and or fertility challenges. It would be staffed with people who have high IQ's and mostly people who care, love and support. Is it really such a mystery? After spending some time on B&B I have a really good idea of what women need throughout this process. It's so sad and frustrating. it's obvious that we have to be very pro active, pushy, knowledgable chicks. We have to seek this support and push them all the way.

Anyhoo babe...sorry for the long rant. I'm sorry your frustrated. Thank you for opening dialogue and sharing your experience. It's sad we go through this but you're teaching many women here how to get answers and help. AND you're supporting so many others (the way our dr.s and nurses should) It is my prayer that you get answers Megg and that you feel loved and supported. You're so special and karma is supposed to be like a boom-er-ang. It's just got to come back. It has to.

I hope the angels rock your broken heart. xo, Donna

 

[Megg33k]

Thank you, Donna! I don't mind the long rant. I loved it, actually! I took down the entire list of blood tests that your naturopath suggested. I'm hoping I can get my own doc to write up a script for them. I certainly can't afford it if my insurance doesn't cover it... and they won't cover it if my doc doesn't write it up! I think if I took the list to my GP, she would gladly do those tests. It sucks that I have to pay her $30 every time I walk through the door though! Maybe I could get her to write up the script for all of it in one appointment so that I don't lose more than $30 on the whole thing? Hoping, hoping, hoping! I really, really appreciate your input, honey! You have no idea!

I hate that we have to be so proactive! Why the hell don't doctors do this themselves? Why can't they have an ounce of compassion? How can they tell me that my tests were all normal when my Vit D was 18 and it should really be >30 or 50-70 (depending on which article I choose to believe). I kept reading... and there were people confined to wheelchairs who were undiagnosed with severe Vit D deficiency and within 6 weeks of being diagnosed and treated, they were mobile again! That uhm... Well, it sounds like a HUGE issue!

I'll find a doctor who will run my damn tests... That's 100% for sure! I'm done playing around! I could handle the first loss being "just one of those things"... but NO! Not anymore! Its just too much to handle when it probably could have been prevented!

I feel like this should all be a thread in and of itself! So we TTCAL girls can advise others on what tests to push for if their doctors are failing them! I'd love to get a thread started with you! You seem quite knowledgeable! I'm going to make the thread and hope you join me!

Thank you again so, so, so much!

 

[Megg33k]

Thread is here: Doctors, Tests, & All the Rest!

 

[aussiettc]

oh megg and grovygirl sorry that your doctors are being so hard to deal with throughout this period. I wish you could have my doctor he's every helpful and has run numerous tests and is willing to try and help. i have 2 cycles of metformin before moving on to something higher to help with ovulation.

 

[groovygrl]

GREAT IDEA! I'll definately get onboard!

I know what you mean re $. That's a big part of my anxiety too. Everytime I walk into the dr. it's another $35 so when the silly cow at the lab asked me to go back and get silly forms retyped I went a little mental. I pay for naturopath, acupuncture, herbs, lotions and potions, preg. tests, OV predict tests, opening the dr.'s office door and as you know all to well we pay in blood sweat and tears too! I would love to buy some new boots, good face cream (instead of cheap drug store brands), etc but... every dime right now goes towards the persuit of a healthy pregnancy and baby.

Anyhoo...I would love to share and learn via an educational thread. I can really see the benefit of learning how to navigate the health care system and empowering each other with the knowledge to get the answers and support we need. I'll recruit a couple of other very clever ladies to share what they know too. Hb1 put out a great link to a chart of all the tests and the meaning of the results on another thread. I'll find it and post it. She's a great wellspring of medical knowledge too!

Yes vitamin d sounds like a biggy, looking forward to seeing what you dig up there.

sleep well kitten, x

 

[groovygrl]

aussie - thanks I wish I had your dr. too! you're about to be admitted to the bar soon too! how cool is that!

I hope you have success with the increased metformin. thanks for sharing your journey too! I hope you get a BFP before they up the anti!

see you ladies on the new thread! thanks for that Megg!