TTCAL February Forever Babies - 50% BFP's! 10 testers

[shelleney]

Just to let you know I am thinking of you and your bean this weekend Chilli. I trully hope that this one sticks, and stays longer than 7-9 weeks. Hopefully for the full 40 weeks!
Lots of love to you xx

 

[Tigerlilies]

Chilli, I'll say a prayer that your little bean is doing just fine! Are you still on the steroids?

 

[Chilli]

yes I am Tiger - and progesterone and aspirin...

 

[tryforbaby2]

Chilli, I have prayed for you last sunday at church and will say a pray for you this sunday at church. I really hope you are one of those lucky women with spotting AND a healthy baby. I know everyone is different, but my sister had random spotting for 2 weeks around 8 weeks gestation and she was put on bed rest for 2 weeks and all was fine after that and 30+ weeks later she delivered a healthy baby boy. I wish I could remember exactly what she said the issue was. I thought there was a tear or a pucture or something along those lines on her uterus and it healed. BUT I could be totally wrong about what it was. I'll ask her when she calls later and give you the right info! But the point is that she spotted (all shades...brown, pink, red) and baby was ok.

 

[tryforbaby2]

And about stopping ttc

I am just so tired of living my life with constantly thinking about babies, making babies, being jealous over pregnant women and babies, and why is it so hard for us, being mad at my husband for his issue, being mad at myself for mine.

My daughter knew about the baby last summer. The three of us looked at baby's growth every week in my pregnancy journal. She came to the ultrasound and seen baby jumping around, flailing its arms and legs and seen its heart beating away (even though it was very high 178bpm). She had been asking for a sibling for many many years. Took us nearly a year to get pregnant (which was annoying but still good statistic wise). We all discussed and voted on names. She was getting her room prepared, in case it wouldve been a girl and she wanted her to room with her.

When we were on vacation and my miscarriage started, Hailey was mad at me. She thought I bumped my belly, or fell or was in the sun too much at the beach. My In Laws drove 6 hours down to where we were vacationing and they watched Hailey as we went to the hospital (I couldnt put Hailey through this if something was wrong). After many hours and test after test and ultrasound. The doctor said so very bluntly that baby's heart stopped working, you have had a miscarriage.
We immediately started crying and the first words from dh's mouth was "How is Hailey going to take this?".......Well let me say this. She didnt take it well.
I didnt take it well. I lived off it. Talked about it constantly and for the rest of the vacation and for the rest of summer, I did nothing outside and didnt go anywhere. I really deprived my DD mommy time because of the intense grieveing I was dealing with.
Everyday for a month and a half, Hailey had a new baby name for us to consider, until finally it stopped.
Hailey started Kindergarten a few months later, and the first picture she drew was of her and I smiling while mommy was holding the smiley opk in her hand.

Devastating and sad.

My point of all this rambling, is that the child we do have, has feeling of it all too. And if we are always sad or what have you with ttc. They sense it too. Hence a big part of why I think I need to take it easy.

I already have one blessing who needs me so much!

I really really hope your daughter gets the sibling she probably wishes so much for.
Its really tough to tell a small child they will have no one.

I am bawling my eyes out writing this.

Love Ya girl and hope this truly is it for you.

 

[cla]

Try iam so sorry xxxxxx

 

[tryforbaby2]

P.S. I got a call from the re yesterday that I also have low progesterone and need suppositories. Every pharmacy I called with my prescription doesnt have it, they'd have to order it. How annoying!

Have a good weekend everyone!

 

[Chilli]

Oh Try - I cried all the way through that too - it's such a hard call! My DD also knew about the last baby and telling her it didn't make it was right up there with the worst experiences of my life - I watched her little heart break and felt so bad I'd ever given her the hope.

She doesn't know anything about this LO but weirdly patted my belly the other day when I got back from my scan. If we get that far I will introduce them at my 20 week scan.

A couple of months ago I was crying and she asked me why - I told her that it was because I didn't think I could give her a baby broother or sister - she hugged me and said "It's ok, I don't want a baby brother or sister anymore Mummy".I don't want her growing up feeling bad about all this in any way - which is why enough is enough for us if this one doesn't work out - like you say we are truelly blessed wit the one with have and I want to get on with celebrating that!

So, love you back and am always here for you if you need me

 

[mpepe32]

Oh my heavens, reading these posts are making my heart ache.

chilli - I hope your spotting is nothing to worry about but I feel your pain. I can remember how upsetting it is when you see spotting when your preg. For my last preg. I thought all was well, went to a festival, walking around seeing all the children, babies thinking about my bean inside my belly -very happy then came home to find blood in my underwear. Hugs and prayers to you my dear.

try - you and your family have been through so much turmoil, especially hard for Hailey. Progesterone is an easy fix so that's the good news. And I know you might not believe it but the fact that you were able to conceive after DH's accident proves you can conceive. I hope hailey gets a little sibling. I was an only child and do feel like I kind of missed out so wanting more children is not being selfish because you already have a child.

Hugs to all of you

 

[tryforbaby2]

Mpepe, cla and chilli, thank you all so very much. I wish I could see you all in person and hug each and every one of you. I spoke to DH last night, he is upset but we agreed to go to conseling. I neeeed to stop obsessing, but I still feel like I want to try for another.

Chilli, I am thinking of you and hope that experience never happens again. The kids don't understand any of this yet. If I were you, I would embrace my baby girl and spend mommy and me time during this difficult wait for you. Speaking of which, I have a mommy and me day planned for today with my dd. We are getting pedicures (well I am, she is getting her painted and designed), then off to get haircuts and some small shopping and lunch. She is my baby, and all I have at the moment. I was watching good luck charlie with her this morning and the dad was crying because his little girl was 16 and soon she will be leaving and growing up too fast. It makes me want more mommy and me time now. Good Luck Love. I want nothing but the best outcome for you.

 

[tryforbaby2]

P.S. I started a March Mommies To Be TTCAL Testing Thread.

I would love if you guys would keep in touch with the rest of us!

 

[shelleney]

Oh Chilli and Try.
My heart is breaking for you both.
I do not have any children (except my angel and my bean) so I cant imagine what either of you are going through. I just want you to know that I am thinking of you both, and praying for you both. I hope all of your dreams come true
xx

 

[mpepe32]

Thanks for starting the new thread try. There is nothing wrong with having hopes and dreams, we just can't miss out on today what we are hoping for tomorrow. I'm in the same boat of obsessing and not being happy with what I have. I was so tempted to bd every day I had ewcm but this time was committed to every other day. I had to fight the thoughts that if I don't bd, than I'm missing that night and what if that night was the night, yada yada yada. So I tried to stress a little less and not put so much pressure on us. DH has seen me go through depression before and he was very worried it was happening again, so I just had to try to relax. I have no OPK's or HPT's in the house to try to curb the obession. It sounds like you have a wonderful family and are blessed. But until you've gone through a mc, no one can really really feel your pain. As compassionate as my DH is, I sometimes felt like he just didn't get it. So I understand that this can put a strain on relationships. But I think you and your dh will come out of these experiences stronger than ever. So that being said, have a wonderful girly day out! You deserve it too!

OH and the most wonderful avatar pic!

 

[bluesky]

Big Big Try xxxx

 

[mpepe32]

Hi blue!

 

[bluesky]

Hi Mpepe, Hope your enjoying the weekend!

 

[mpepe32]

Well at work today BUT going out for greek tonight! So not cooking! Tomorrow just relaxing hopfully. Hope you're enjoying your weekend also!

 

[tryforbaby2]

Mpepe, GREEK! Yummy! Thanks for your kind words. DH's sometimes just don't get it. I think we shall try and be more positive towards ttc. It cant hurt right?.....Your welcome for starting the new thread. It will give me more to look forward to.

Shelleney, having a child already or not, doesn't constitute our srong feelings and desires for 'THE' family we have always dreamed of. I hope you get your very special family! Thanks for your kind words.

Hey Blue!!! Please, wont you join us in ttcal march mommies to be????......

For ou preggo girls, I would love if you could still check in with us and let us know how you are doing. Hope we will al be joining you guys very soon!

OK OK, off to church then some errands and home to clean and make our sunday dinner. Enjoy your day, everyone!

 

[tryforbaby2]

Thanks Cla! Wont you also come join us in ttcal mommies to be?.......

 

[bluesky]

Ok I will be popping over there now!!!