Ultimate Venting Thread

[phoenixrose]

I really should just start a TTC blog for all my ranting, lol. Today's rant.

How is it that the infertile nurse in the clinic (me) has to manage all the pregnant women?! Seriously. This isn't even intentional, I just happen to be managing them for the last 2 years.

And seriously, maybe the holidays are making me a witch but trying for 2 months is NOT LTTC!!!!!!!! It's quite insensitive to come into a forum where everyone is already down about having to go through yet another holiday season without a baby and have someone come in after 2 months.

I'm sorry but that's just the way I feel today.

I completely agree with you! And you can tell who they are because there is not an ounce of bitterness in their tone. I was reading another thread: crazy things LTTTC has made you do, and read one of the responses and for some reason I started looking in her signature for how long she had been trying cause most people put it...2 months...aaaahhhhhhhhh!!!! Why the he'll was she even being nosey in here? I understand stragglers at 10 months...but wtf? I feel like I should post something in there but sometimes I think if I can't say anything nice then I shouldn't say anything.

 

[lian_83]

Wow, this is defo my thread.

Been trying for as long as I can remember, maybe 2 years with my husband, or shall I say ex-husband (the guy can't take the pressure and disappointments of TTC), and then now 8 cycles with donors.

So after losing my husband and probably my sanity, I think the doctors are finally able to explain this infertility --a nasty polyp in my uterus acting like an IUD and preventing any kind of implantation or causing early miscarriages.

Now, there are so many what ifs in my life, like if only I have gone to the FS last year instead of the acupuncturist, maybe I would still be married by now and we're a family instead of me doing this all alone..

 

[NavyWife84]

I am so sorry to hear that about your marriage, but honestly, a baby causes a lot of stress for the next 18 years at least! If he couldn't handle 2 years of ttc, how did he think he was going to handle fatherhood? I'm sorry if that sounds harsh but it sounds like you are better off without him. I don't know what I would do without dhs support.
Anyway, it sounds like the polyp is something they can fix with surgery? I hope so. Good luck with it, have a beautiful baby, and find a man that deserves you and your lo!

 

[Armywife84]

Wow, this is defo my thread.

Been trying for as long as I can remember, maybe 2 years with my husband, or shall I say ex-husband (the guy can't take the pressure and disappointments of TTC), and then now 8 cycles with donors.

So after losing my husband and probably my sanity, I think the doctors are finally able to explain this infertility --a nasty polyp in my uterus acting like an IUD and preventing any kind of implantation or causing early miscarriages.

Now, there are so many what ifs in my life, like if only I have gone to the FS last year instead of the acupuncturist, maybe I would still be married by now and we're a family instead of me doing this all alone..

I completely admire you for going for your dream alone! Infertility can rip apart a marriage, it's more common than people think. It has really pushed my marriage to the limit. Thankfully, it has made us a bit stronger of a couple.

Meh, you don't need a man to have a baby...just some science!

 

[Armywife84]

Wonderstars- You should start a blog! I'd stalk it!

Yeesh ladies, I'm absent one day and look what happens! I'm sure the girl got it confused with the TTC thread and just chimed in. Thankfully, she has had enough sense and tact not to strike back. Usually it breaks out into a flame war. LTTC ladies versus 1 TTCer .

MY RANT of THE DAY......

I was chatting with MIL about what she's going to do now she's retired and suggested she travel with FIL all over the US. Then she said she's sure she'll visit AZ (pregnant SIL, 2yr old twins) and VA (her daughter plus 1.5yr old).....BUT she didn't say anything about visiting us when we move to KY. I took this the wrong way and thought she wasn't visiting us because we don't have children!! Granted we'll be 5 hours out, but we're not going to be coming back as often because I'll be in school! I often feel so left out because I don't have a grandchild for her to fawn over.

Ugh I hate how this visit has made me so emotional! It was incredibly hard to endure, but thankfully I'm home and can go back to hiding out!

 

[lian_83]

I am so sorry to hear that about your marriage, but honestly, a baby causes a lot of stress for the next 18 years at least! If he couldn't handle 2 years of ttc, how did he think he was going to handle fatherhood? I'm sorry if that sounds harsh but it sounds like you are better off without him. I don't know what I would do without dhs support.
Anyway, it sounds like the polyp is something they can fix with surgery? I hope so. Good luck with it, have a beautiful baby, and find a man that deserves you and your lo!

Thanks, but he's really a great guy and it's my lost much more than his, well at least he has good genes.

I hope I can go ahead with the surgery but with the holidays I feel like my hands are tied and can't really do anything other than wait for the rest of the world to stop celebrating. I'm not really a scrooge or anything, in fact I try not to contact my friends and be a sour pus, I just spend the days by myself, either by reading a book or watching chick flicks.

Will I ever get pregnant??? I hope so... I certainly hope so.

 

[SunUp]

This is my rant right now... I hope I can barge in?
So, I am a secret TTCer... but just because I don't TELL people my business does NOT mean I want their advice "Oh you two should have a baby! just ...blahblahblah."

I WANT a baby and your stupid advice does NOT work. Trust me, I have already tried. Its hard to even act nice at this point, I keep hearing it from everyone! I mean, they mean well, and I am not telling everyone about my LTTC, but I hate it that people 1: assume and 2: think I want their advice.

 

[Armywife84]

Of course, Sun Up. Please, vent away! I agree, fertile people just don't get it.

I can't stop thinking about how another year gone and I've yet to conceive. The fecking has yet to show up (she's due today) and I'm not testing because I don't want to start my New Year off with an evident negative! FML.

 

[wannabemummyb]

I need to vent:

1. I have had 20 days of spotting but not period. The spotting is only noticeable when i wipe and is cm tinged with red/pink/ orange!

2. A friend is whinging on fb because she had a bad year because she got pg again when her second child was 9 weeks old! She says she hopes her luck improves next tear! FFS does she not realise how lucky she is! She has three gorgeous kids and i'm stuck in a hell limbo where my cycles are f'd!

3. I thought my body was regulating but seems not! FS won't do anything for another six months! I need to lose 3 stone to get down my bmi before she will give me clomid! I want to be healthy for my kids and am working my socks off, have lost three stone already! So feel like i start getting somewhere and the goal posts are moved!

Vent over. Thanks ladies x

 

[JanetPlanet]

OHHHHHHH YEAHHHHHHHHHH this is the thread for me today!!

***Disclaimer: For anyone who’s squeamish, just immediately bypass this post because it’s a loo-loo. I am actually a very caring person and I can’t really explain what’s wrong with me today. I guess I finally went koo-koo from all this LTTC.***

I hate everyone and everything today. I'm 9dpo and got a BFFN. I only tested today because I was already depressed... but that BFFN put the nail in my coffin. I AM SO MOTHERFLUFFING TIRED OF THIS!!!!!

So my husband is tiptoeing around me today and even THAT is pissing me off! LMAO I'm a monster!

I'm SOOO irrational today, that it's actually starting to be funny. My husband just made me a bagel (I haven’t eaten bread in months…have to watch what you eat when you’re TTCing, don’tcha know), and I told him we’ll see if he makes it out of the room alive, depending on whether or not he buttered this bagel correctly. We just looked at each other and burst out laughing. Normally, I would thank him and tell him how much I appreciate him. SO WHERE IS THAT NICE GIRL TODAY?

My biggest irritation: delusionally positive thinking. It makes me feel like my feelings aren't being taken seriously. Everyone seems to do it and IT PISSES ME OFF!! Don’t tell me everything looks great. If everything looked great, there would be a beautiful healthy baby in my belly. How can everything possibly look great when I had SIX mature follicles and a BFFN today????

And I of course I can’t take any anti-anxiety drugs cuz I may….MAY be preggers. Yeah right.

Well ok then. I guess I got that off my chest and sore boobs.

 

[Foxybabyhg3]

I can so relate to many of you. Sick of the FB announcements, sick of the 7 girls in my office that have just had a baby or are pregnant within a few yrs and there's only 12 ladies in there. I have been secretly staying behind and sitting in their chairs in case they held some sort of power

And one of the non-pregnant girls, who tells me with all of her 23yrs old knowledge-just relax, forget about it and it'll happen. Yeah, cos after trying for over 10yrs I can just forget that I'm about to hit the threshold for getting IVF on the NHS (age limit 38) (if I can lose 3 stone which seems IMPOSSIBLE to shift due to the PCOS), and I can forget to know when I'm supposed to ovulate, I don't give a monkey's chuff if your Mother's friends, daughters, room mate's, dog walkers, sister in law tried for 40 yrs and just decided to give up and *poof* she had triplets naturally..................

Wow, I feel so much better now-thanks

 

[lian_83]

I need to vent here - i've stopped using Facebook because every friend of mine seems to be super fertile and gets pregnant with a sneeze. I, on the other hand, has virtually no chance of getting pg unless i get this polyp remove, and i dont have insurance to pay for it. What more, my husband who has insurance and money, has left me and is asking for a divorce.

Yup, life sucks!!!!

 

[JanetPlanet]

Aloha lian_hawaii, are you in Hawaii? I used to live in Kailua-Kona.

First, eff your husband for leaving. Second, I was DEVASTATED for a long long time when my ex-husband left me. But it was one of the best things that ever happened to me, and I silently thank him every single day for it now.

You seem so strong, good for you. But I do hope you have people around you who are supportive.

As for your polyp, I know here in California and in other states, there are programs for people who do not have or cannot get insurance. I didn't know about this, but my friend has it apparently. Have you looked into something like this? Also, if you're not legally divorced yet, he cannot stop you from using his insurance. He can try to take you off of his policy at work, but the court would not be happy with him.

I know you're just here to rant, but I guess I just had to butt in.

Best wishes!

 

[wonderstars]

Oh Facebook, if only you could see how miserable you're making us. So sorry ladies about all the announcements.

lian - I have nothing to offer but hugs. I hope you find some payment plan option that is able to give you the option to remove the polyp.

I have no energy to put forth for a real rant, I just really hate my spotting and the fact that no physician seems concerned about it! Aargh.

 

[Calasen]

That's it I have had enough of this year already!!!

New years day I had a miscarriage didn't even know we had managed this month! Thankfully was very early stage so no risk of damage.

Then less then an hour ago my nan died

Really don't want this year!!!

 

[StorkStalker]

Calasen, I am very sorry for the loss of your nan... and for your early MC... I don't know what else to say, except we are here with you..

 

[wonderstars]

My sympathies Calasen.

 

[Armywife84]

My condolences as well .

Rant:

I just wish I could stop thinking about SIL being due soon. Hopefully, my MIL has some tact not to send me a picture message of the baby. Thank god they live on the other side of the US and I don't have to see them ever!

I ran the idea of skipping Christmas this year if we're not pregnant and DH wasn't too into it. Whatever, I'll take myself on a nice beach vacation. All I know is I'm not going thru another hurtful Christmas like that. Especially if I have to be around LOs and meet the new baby.

 

[wonderstars]

WTH? Tell your DH to get with it. No sex for him in the hot Caribbean sun. I'm sure he'll get his act together before then. The holidays are a long way away and there is much that can happen before then.



Back to work tomorrow so there goes all my lurking time on B&B. I am having THE worst period after this selective HSG. 5 days late, super super heavy and painful - and periods are never any of those things. Owie.

Men are lucky SOBs.

 

[Armywife84]

With or without him, I'm going!

Perhaps you can pretend you're doing spreadsheets and close the BNB tab when your boss walks by?

RANT: I just can't stand when a woman who accidentally got pregnant while on the pill (unfortunately miscarried) comes over to the LTTC section and cuts down a fellow LTTCer for venting. Seriously, you don't see me going on the Loss forum telling those women at least they know they can get pregnant (not necessarily true) or whatever else they hate hearing.

If you do not belong in this forum, no woman in this section wants to be here, then don't bother posting your $2 worth of rude "advice".