VENT THREAD! Things you WISH you could say..

[jd11]

Dear customers who do their shopping at the supermarket i work at,

Winter has just started and for once it is actually colder than usual earlier than usual meaning people are get colds and flu and whatever nasty germ going around. I understand everyone has to get food etc especially when sick, but spare a thought for all the people serving you or touching products you have touched. Cover your damn mouth when coughing your damn guts up!! It is highly disgusting and unhygienic. Too the parents of sick kids why on earth would you let them run around the store like noone owns them???? coughing and wiping their snotty lil noses with their hands and then touching everything including the fresh fruit and vege. Seriously how hard is it to have some common sense and use basic hygiene. I am pregnant and i can not afford to take time off from a germ you have passed on to me from not covering your mouth when coughing. And if you are as sick as you sound why are you even out spreading your germs. You pass these germs onto others and they may even have loved ones in their house that aren't capable of fending off germs as fast as you (newborns, elderly or someone with a comprimised immune system)

 

[Rigi.kun]

To my cat: Yes the dog has puppy milk in his box, No that does not mean that you can jump in the box with him to have some.

 

[AngelofTroy]

Dear OH, I have worked 2 overnight shifts on top of my full time job this week while nearly 6 months pregnant, and have another one tonight. You on the other hand have 2 days off work... So NO the vacuuming is not 'my job', I might have done it all in the past but our vacuum is heavy and I am exhausted! My 5ft2, 53yr old mother has come round to help me with it recently.. don't you think that's YOUR job??

Oh and it was very sweet of you to plan me a complicated meal the other night... but as soon as you rang from work saying you were feeling poorly, I knew I'd end up doing the work. THat is why I suggested I make something easy and that we postpone it.. but NO you INSISTED you were 'treating me'. Low and behold 20 mins after you start cooking you are 'too dizzy' and have to lie down. So I have to take over the 4 pan AND oven extravaganza that has exploded in our kitchen and cook til after 9pm (after working overnight then a full day's work + extra training) at which point you Are MIRACULOUSLY well enough to come downstairs and eat it.

YES it was good, but I would have rather put an oven pizza in and gone to bed!

 

[AngelofTroy]

Oh and I washed up all the pans, chopping boards, scales, knives etc and cleaned the hob.. so why are the plates and oven dish you said you'd take care of still in the sink? It makes me feel sick looking and old food you know this!

 

[MoonShadow14]

I LOVE this thread!

I have a few:

Dear OH
I love you dearly but if you smack our son again out of frustration and lack of patience I will kick you in the testicles so hard that you will not need the snip and they will have to be retrieved from your throat, which I have already warned you about.
Also out your f**king phone DOWN! Your hand is like a claw!!
No, my hormones are not making me cranky, I finally have the fight back in me that I had when we first met but was worn down but your constant strops so yes, I answer back like I used to.

To others:
NO! I will not be getting rid of my dogs! Why would I? I didn’t take any “advice” when pregnant with DS and they have been with me for 10 years now and are the sweetest dogs ever
Also, yes I am bottle feeding again! Ring Social Services coz I’m not breast feeding!
DO NOT touch my stomach. I am aware I am overweight and I am very self conscious about my belly and the fat that is there, putting your hands on it is not allowed!!
DO NOT ask me personal questions like, was it planned (yes it f**ling was), are you hoping for a girl (healthy and get what we are given and actually it’s a boy!), no I don’t have piles!, no not breast feeding and stop tutting, yes I will be returning to work (mortgage plays huge part in our lives sadly).

 

[MoonShadow14]

To my mother:

My child is NOT calling you Mammy, its too close to mummy and mama! And also when I lose my Grandma that I called G-mama, it doesn't mean you can now just decide my baby is calling you G-mama. it's still raw and hearing the name spoken upsets me. So no, you're not being called that - you can be Grandma like we agreed. When I tell you my G-mama isn't being replaced you don't need to act like a sulky child and shout "whatever!" and say I don't let you do anything, seriously?!

Really? She suggested that coz thats just creepy?!

 

[MamaHix1409]

Dear boss,

Bite me.

No love, Me.

 

[Sapphire83]

Dear DHL,
Will you deliver my package already??!

 

[mummyat18]

what a good post idea.

to my brothers gf.... please keep your opinions to yourself, just cause my brothers dating you doesn't mean i have to like you. my job as his sister is to hope the best for him and put up with you. not like you and suddenly want to go shopping with you and ps. yeah i know my shirt doesnt fit im pregnant. at least my clothes are tight cause i have a child growing in me, not cause im in denial about my size and buy clothes clearly to small for me. ps. just by clothes that fit you, who cares if there from a plus size store.

to society... does it look like i care what you think?

to my OH's cousin.... seriously if you told any women she was being a pussy because of labour pains i would seriously look into letting the emergency room on the first floor know where your gonna be when you say it.

to my OH... umm sex please? and i swear if you mention the fact i gained weight one more time i will not put you down as the father of this child and make you pay child support so your childs mom can go get a gym membership. lol

to my mother in law........ please please please do not repeat yourself again. i can handle a story 3 times but after that its really hard to keep in telling you that youve already told me this 3 times and i still dont really care that picture on fb is hilarious. and i really dont need to walk down 3 flights of stairs to see it. its not that important lol

 

[miss cakes]

dear FOB can you fuckoff and vanish until after the baby is born and i can tolerate you again and by the way you make me cringe (oh wait i have said that to his face already)
to my darling mother can you stop giving me shit advice that went out of date 20 years ago its been ages since you had a baby and you have clearly forgotten what it was ever like thankyou

 

[MoonShadow14]

....

 

[mysteriouseye]

Dear hayfever, you are not welcome!! GO AWAY!!

 

[Strike]

Dear SIL - Just because your friend was told she was having a girl and then ended up with a boy does not mean the same will happen to us, even though your grandmother, who has never been wrong with her guesses (You know she has a 50/50 chance of guessing right each time, right?), has pulled on her old-world knowledge and determined we are having a boy. Scans are a helluva lot more accurate nowadays and we have at least one more before the birth anyway.

To MIL -- Stop f'in asking if I have felt the baby! This is mine and DH's baby and it is a very special thing. We don't have to tell you every little detail and every time something new happens!

To certain coworkers - I just spent last week doing three weeks worth of work so that I could go to Germany for two weeks and put my focus on my courses. All that I ask is that you do the few things I asked of you, which I would have asked you to do anyway, so that everything gets done that needs doing. I don't appreciate looking like a douche and having to call back home in the evenings, when I should be studying, because you aren't getting things done on time. Having a reporter e-mail and call me is NOT COOL!

To my OH -- Please, please, please!!!! have the house in a better state than I left it. Please do the laundry, please water the plants, please take out the garbage and empty the fridge of rotten or expired food, and maybe this time get me a little something to say how much you missed me? I am not on a vacation here and, even when I do get time to explore, I really don't want to, because I don't have you here enjoying it with me. I just want some sign that you feel the same way.

 

[Emerald87]

Dear DHL,
Will you deliver my package already??!

Saph, you know DHL stands for Dick Heads Limited, right? You're not getting your package any time soon...

 

[Rigi.kun]

To the rotten school kids: Get the F-k out of my yard and don't f-king come back! My gate is shut for a reason and there is no reason why you should be in my yard. I don't care if you think my puppy is cute, go get your own bloody dog!

 

[miss cakes]

To the rotten school kids: Get the F-k out of my yard and don't f-king come back! My gate is shut for a reason and there is no reason why you should be in my yard. I don't care if you think my puppy is cute, go get your own bloody dog!

you really love kids then? hahahahaha

 

[Emerald87]

To the rotten school kids: Get the F-k out of my yard and don't f-king come back! My gate is shut for a reason and there is no reason why you should be in my yard. I don't care if you think my puppy is cute, go get your own bloody dog!

you really love kids then? hahahahaha

I was thinking of an old guy (picture Clint Eastwood) on the porch mumbling "where's my shotgun..." *spits*

LOL Rigi not a pay out of you, just what came to mind. Kids should be educated not to frikkin trespass.

 

[Rigi.kun]

To the rotten school kids: Get the F-k out of my yard and don't f-king come back! My gate is shut for a reason and there is no reason why you should be in my yard. I don't care if you think my puppy is cute, go get your own bloody dog!

you really love kids then? hahahahaha

Oh yeah totally, other peoples teenage problems bring the sunshine to my day... not

Oh and to my dog: please stop pissing on the floor, thank you

 

[ChesMik4eva]

To my recently knocked up friend: You NEED to take your effin' prenatals. Don't listen to your dipshit boyfriend who says they cause "depression", they are natural for god's sake and contain vital folic acid for you developing baby!

 

[MoonShadow14]

Removed