waiting for ivf and struggling!

[MinxyChick]

Sounds like things are going well for everyone & everyone has nice weekends to look forward to (sorry if your working - MummyW). Looking forward to everyone's updates.

I've seen lots of mention of these seminars, they sound useful, we were given a information sheets & no real guidance from our hospital. They seemed so afraid to give false hope they didn't want to give any advice.

AFM: Stopped BCP yesterday and today is day 4 of down regging. So far no side affects, unrelated I have a terrible cough & cold, second one in exactly a month.
Hoping to see some friends & have a relaxing weekend. Trying to muster my usual PMA. I found an old diary note from 2011, I'd read in a magazine to list the reasons why I should get pregnant and what may cause an issue. The only thing in the issue list was 'stress' I felt I ough to put something in that column and one of my reasons why we should get pregnant was 'DH sperm was fine'!!! I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I accept due to it dropping they didn't lie to us initially but the count was still borderline.

Looking forward to spending some quality time with DH this weekend, just hope I'm not coughing and spluttering.
Also next week, we've got 2 days off for our 11th Wedding Anniversary and I'm taking him for a surprise night away, only an hours drive away, just want a little break before IVF to relax together and have a couple of days out. Surprise cos he'd poo poo the idea of paying to spend the night away only an hours drive from home! But I need this

 

[mummy.wannabe]

That sounds lovely minxy- we did that before we started this round and it was nice to do something different.
Hubby will enjoy it when he's there.
Now you've really started your treatment. You'll be at egg collection in no time x

 

[2have4kids]

How long do you ladies in Britain get off for mat leave? I'm sure I've asked this before but I've forgotten.

Still at home sick, sore throat is now a dry cough and all of the nasty cold symptoms hit yesterday. Stuffy nose, watery eyes, sneezy etc. going to help mom get ready for hardwood floor installation. Slept most of yesterday bleh!

 

[mummy.wannabe]

Thought you'd be better by now.
Sorry your not.
Are you resting?
We are allowed a year off but only get paid for 40 weeks.
I get paid 90% of my salary for 6 weeks and then for 33 weeks I get £130 a week which is nothing compared to what I get paid but we will have to cope on hubby's salary and I don't plan on going back to work, we going to try and manage.
I want to look after my own children x

 

[2have4kids]

Minxy I hope you feel better soon. Mummy yes I slept for most of the day the last few days. It's amazing how tired I get doing absolutely nothing

 

[MinxyChick]

2have4 - hope you feel better soon. You have my sympathies!

I think in my job we can take up to 2 years off unpaid. I think Mummy's employer is does what is called statutory maternity pay. I work for a big corporate & I think we get something a bit different at their discretion but still a massive drop in salary. I would love to be a full time mummy but am planning todo a 3 day week. If we have twins or I get made redundant in this latest round of cuts the plan may change. I know it sounds bad but I've been hanging on at my job for the maternity pay & flexible hours. Also we get 6 days a year fertility leave. The benefits are excellent but the job sucks quite a lot of the time.

 

[mummy.wannabe]

Doesn't sound bad at all minxy.
I would do the same if you get better pay that statatory and flexible pay.
With twins I don't think its fair to ask my mum or my MIL to look after them as it will be so much harder for them.
I want to do if myself and If we are really struggling for money then ill see if my old job will take me back part time or ill look else where really x

Glad you have been taking it easy 2have4 kids

 

[2have4kids]

Does your govt help with nanny costs? We can write them off here in Canada. As soon as I have 2 bundles of joy the plan is to get a nanny. Then they can help out with light cleaning & it's about $1500/month while daycare for 2 kids is $2000/month. Mom was very clear that she wouldn't be our 'nanny', she's got a busy social schedule at 72 lol. I've got a big house with 5 bedrooms/2 kitchens so hopefully a live in nanny would be a better option for us. I would like to go back to work full time. I only work 4 days a week with 1 of then at home anyway (full time hours). We'll see, AF just came today, children just seem like a far off dream.

Minxy have a fabulous relaxing evening celebrating your 11year anniversary -congratulations!

 

[mummy.wannabe]

No they don't cover childcare costs at all unless you are unemployed and are on benefits you get extra money and help. But they don't need childcare if they don't work.
Our country is screwed up and just keeps helping the people that don't want to help themselves.
They also get a £500 grant to help with setting up for a baby.
So we pay for that. A lot of things aren't fair but I'm glad we work for our money.

You will get your chance at children very soon, you just got to keep positive that its going to work. You have to.

 

[2have4kids]

That's funny you said that, we were just skiing with an english chap who went OFF on Tony Blair's handouts. He said he's made it so easy for people to come in from other countries and get free handouts, as well as people who simply don't want to work, he felt that Tony Blair flushed England down the toilet. My OH and I had no idea, do you guys feel the same way? We were so focused on hating Bush at the time of Tony Blair that he looked like a saint to us. Especially with out own country's fiascos, crooked prime minister's party was caught paying private companies for not doing any work.

 

[mummy.wannabe]

Yeah I think tony Blair had a lot to do with it and know David Cameron had got to try rake the money back in and cutting people benefits Etc he is doing bedroom tax for people on benefits, who have spare rooms, they will get taxed more.
People come to the country because they know our governing give out money to them.
Some people may not agree with me but it seems the people that need help, don't get it and people that don't want to work have an easy life.
They are trying to force people to work. You shouldn't be better off on benefits, to make people work.

We have just ordered a Chinese and hope it doesn't take too long coz I'm starving.
Ill have to have a little snack so I don't start feeling sick,
Had a very busy day at work x

 

[MinxyChick]

I agree with your comments MummyW.

Urgghhhh....remember my friend who forewarned me she was going to start TTC number 3 (9 years after number 2), anyway got a little facebook message from her today to let me know she's 5 weeks pregnant. Well, what I can I say she's been very sweet to let me know about everything first up before everyone else, obviously currently a big secret. But still I can't help feel envious, she's so lucky it so easy for her. And so ironic really as she's like the poster girl for everything you shouldn't do to be fertile, her DH used to have a big pot habit too, not sure these days. I've always been the opposite really & here I am. Every month, every treatment I want it to work so badly but this time I just want it to work so much. Another 4 weeks and we'll know if all our efforts have brought on some good embies.

 

[mummy.wannabe]

Oh minxy sorry love.
I had that all the way through but maybe you'll be sharing that time together.
You could be close in weeks of pregnancy.
Keep positive that this is your time x

Its not fair that people are so fertile but I've said it all the way along, that we will appreciate our children so much more because of the struggle x

My best friend and I are exactly 8 weeks to the day apart so we both have important mile stones soon.
Ill be 12 weeks as she's 20 and should be having our scans around that time x

 

[Ducktales]

I'm sorry Minxy- that also happened to me just as I was starting my buserelin, one of my husbands bloody cousins started a what's app group with her scan telling the whole family she was pregnant
It is shitty but it will be you next
My advice is forget about her and focus on you- this is your story and this is your time
Xxxxx

 

[Pinkie 33]

Hi everyone

Hope you are all ok after such a lovely bank holiday weekend

I got a big surprise yesterday, DP proposed! He wrote it on the hillside in big white fence posts so anyone travelling across the Wolds yesterday will have seen it! So happy, lovely diamond sparkler. Our scan is on Friday and if all goes well, we're hoping to plan a September wedding

 

[Ducktales]

Wow pinkie what fantastic news
Congratulations
What an exciting month
Xxxxx

 

[mummy.wannabe]

Oh wow congratulations! How lovely is that!!! Bless him.
We need picture of the ring?
Did you get a picture of the proposal posts ha? X

So your hoping to get Married before the baby arrives?
Can't wait to see your scan picture!!!

I have my midwife tomorrow so hopefully get to hear the heart beats at least x

 

[MinxyChick]

Congratulations Pinkie! Very imaginative on the posts - sounds a brilliant surprise.

Oooo looking forward to scan pics Pinkie & Mummy.

Afm: we've all been there on the friends/family getting pg first. My friend is a good egg as she's also told our other BFF in our little trio from school, who sent me nice little message to check I'm ok. Which was really sweet, assured her I was at the moment & the world can't stop cos of me, I don't want to put her off starting a family but she seems happy enough with her dogs at the moment. Hopefully this is a good omen.

 

[Melbram]

Minxy: It's so rubbish if one more person tells me they r pregnant I think ill scream

Pinkie! Huge congrats!

 

[Ducktales]

Hi everyone hope you are all ok
Had my scan today
Heartbeat was 120bpm
5.8mm long

Good luck for tomorrow for the scans x