When your bathroom looks like a pharmacy with all the vitamins, preseed, OPK HPT, its there
Under your bed you have over 20 Books on how to make a baby, how to start a family.. tips for IVF etc
when you have an over spilling file with so much paper work with all the receipts and blood tests and phone numbers from the clinic.
when you pee on a stick you stand by the window hallucinating a second line, and the mind starts playing games that theres 2 lines when in fact its starch white!
During your 2WW you check your calendar on your mobile phone at 2am in the morning making a mental note when you should be ovulating next..
When your fridge has leftover drugs from previous IVF cycles (in case it will come in handy one day)
when your husband says 'you dont love me! you just use me' During Ovulation..
When you shed a tear during sex knowing this is going to be another let down
When you have spent so much money in Holland and Barrett on vitamins
When you just stop taking your vitamins and being so obsessed about swallowing 8 a night!
when you look back at your wedding album and think how happy and stress free i was in those pictures
When you find yourself crying hysterically in the darkest of hours afraid the vibration of the bed will wake him..
when you pick up the phone and think in desperation who can i phone!? who can help me? who will tell me i will be a mom?? when you google so much you just want to pass out...
when you find yourself talking to god asking why me? give me a break?
when you stop buying clothes too big for yourself (thinking i will get pregnant soon) its not happening so i will get fitted stuff..
when someone asks about babies you get so defensive! and paranoid that they know were struggling!
when you start hanging baby pictures around the house of yourself..
when you have etopic heartbeats and the doctor says its from stress, it will happen when its time
when you sit in silence with your husband than eat and sleep..
when almost all your girlfriends when you first started baby and bump have been pregnant have had babies, and some blessed ones are already pregnant with baby 2
when a conversation about babies will turn into a fight with your partner,
when your husband STOPS asking questions in your 2ww e.g you feeling different, you went toilet twice last night?
when you see your period theres no longer tears.. your use to it by now..
When you realise its Dec 2012 another year lost
when a friend who just got married calls you, I am thinking SHES PREGNANT and usually they are...
when you can start predicting people that are pregnant and it comes true!
infertility is a very painful word, the amount of time and money wasted, and it truly screws up the happiest of marriages..