Can't admit to anyone else...

[c.m.c]

Welcome wish!!!

SIL good luck tomorrow! Can't wait to hear your news.

 

[sil]

My scan is at 9 AM tomorrow my time (eastern standard time - not sure what time that will be for everyone else but if it helps any I'm making my post at 1:40 PM/13:40 here so just over 19 hours from the time of this post).

Mem, I didn't have any nub shots, but here are my 12 week photos: https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/gender-prediction/2421577-12-week-girl-boy.html
The thread had more boy guesses (7) than girl (5), but I also submitted to the gender experts for ramazi at 8 weeks and they guessed girl and skull at 12 weeks and they guessed girl, so I have everything crossed. We'll see

Also, rant away! We are all friends here.

 

[Bevziibubble]

Good luck Sil

 

[MemmaJ]

I've just had a look at your pics - I think I can see the Nub in one of your 2d pics and I'd guess maybe girl from it..?! Fingers crossed!
You're 6 hours behind us here in the U.K, aaahh it'll be a long morning!

 

[MemmaJ]

I guess it's not really a rant as such, maybe that was the wrong word...!

Basically I'm considering changing my antenatal care to a different trust and I don't know whether to do it or not....
I really don't want to offend my Community Midwife as she is lovely, it's just that I know I'd get better care in the other Trust as I work for them..! Ideally I'd like to avoid any transfer being done through my Midwife too, to avoid any embarrassment or offence to her, but I just feel like maybe things aren't being done completely 'properly'.
I don't know whether I'm just being hyper-critical though because I'm a Midwife myself.

I had my last baby in 'my' trust (the one where I work) and recieved amazing and very thorough care. We've moved to a different town since then, so are now under a different trust/hospital.

So far I've had to mostly fill in my own antenatal Notes (not just the basics which most people do - I'm talking important information like my blood results, working out my own booking BMI etc - because they hadn't been done), but there are whole pages still blank in my notes that should have been completed at Booking.
I had to ask for my Ferritin Levels to be checked yesterday as I have a history of low Ferritin & it hasn't been checked at all in this pregnancy and I feel awful (again, should have been checked at Booking and was last time. Of course it was low and I was put on tablets for it throughout my last pregnancy).
I also haven't been spoken to about testing for Gestational Diabetes despite my mum being diabetic (I don't think she even noticed in my notes that my mum is diabetic because again, my Booking appointment very much felt like 'we'll just skip over all the normal stuff because she's a midwife and she knows'.
She's also classified me as 'low risk'/I haven't been referred to a Consultant despite having my first babies (the twins) prematurely after going into labour at 27 weeks.
I know I've had a baby since then at term (37 weeks), but any previous pre-term delivery makes you high risk - last time I saw a consultant regularly, had extra scans (including cervical ultrasounds to make sure it wasn't prematurely shortening), and just felt generally really well looked after.

I don't know if I'm just being a bit of a diva because I got such 'special' care before, being one of their own midwives, and that its maybe unreasonable to expect the same 'VIP treatment' somewhere else.
And I'd probably have to transfer my Care back to this area before delivery anyway as I don't think I'd make it to 'my' hospital for delivery (traffic dependant, it could take anything between half an hour to an hour).
So maybe it's not worth making a big deal over, and maybe it's the paranoia and over-worrying talking again... but I just can't shake it that things are not being done as they maybe should..?!

 

[c.m.c]

Memma I didn't know you were a midwife... I'm
A radiographer, I am trained in ultrasound but have never done obstetrics!! Hence the fact I still don't know the sex of this baby!!! I have had some lovely private scans but I'm nhs for this baby

I'm having my baby in the trust I work in which isn't the closest to my home but I think the care I have had before has been excellent

I think if it's playing on your mind you might be better changing!

I'm
Usually half an hr from my chose. Hospital but in rush hour traffic it takes me well over an hour!!! I'm happy to risk it as my labours are never that quick

 

[c.m.c]

I also panic about things... sometimes ignorance is bliss. When you're in that line of work it's only natural to know the worst case scenario! I am hypo thyroid but insist that my iron levels are checked each time too!!!

 

[c.m.c]

I knew the sex of both my girls by 16 weeks. I really do think this ones s girl but in every scan there's a foot up at the bum, it's bits a prominent and there's a cord too. It was so lovely being able to get a couple of private scans but then being told not sure of sex has got me feeling like I've been in limbo! I know I will know for sure next Monday so that's my goal

 

[Wish85]

Welcome wish! Is this your first? I also had a STRONG preference for a boy with #1.

SIL tomorrow!!! Oh my word that's gone so quickly. We will be waiting for your news in excited anticipation! Can't wait!! I may just check in every 10 minutes!

Mem so glad you can relax more now after hearing the heartbeat. Whew! I know how anxious I was too until I could feel regular movement. You still have a few weeks till you should feel definite regular kicks with your placenta so don't worry. I think mine is to re right and so I feel loads on the left.

I know it might sound absolutely awful of me but I think now that I know this is my last baby and I am getting the daughter I've always dreamed of, I am extra anxious that everything will go smoothly with the pregnancy and birth.

Thanks Danny, no it's my second - I already have a little boy but I want another. I wouldn't go so far as to say I would have GD if it's a girl but I certainly have no desire for one. I'm a 'boy mum' through & through. My OH wants a girl though so I guess for him it would be nice. I'm one of 5 girls & we all have very strong personalities so it was a little crazy growing up when hormones were thrown in to the mix. It's put me off having a daughter lol even as an aldult I get along better with men.

Mem I'm so glad you heard heartbeat. I knew you would was your nub shot question for me? If so, yes you guessed on my thread - I think boy

Meep hello again hehe baby looks very flexible but I don't think she'll stay in that position too long.

Edited to add - thanks c.m.c we've spoken on some threads before and Mem I just realised your nub question was for Sil sorry

 

[Dannypop]

Wow Mem I also didn't know you were a midwife! If I could do things over again with my career I would become a midwife!!! I love being a designer but delivering babies and being part of the medical profession is a big calling for me!

And no ways you are moaning. You have every right to the best care possible and since you know ALL the details and ins and outs of what goes on from a medical perspective you reallt should get top treatment. I understand you not wanting to offend your current midwife but try find a way to navigate around it. You do need to change if you are not feeling 100%. I certainly wouldn't get a designer I didn't think was up to scratch designing stuff for me!

SIL counting down the hours!!!! You are probably still sleeping now

How awesome Wish that you want another boy. It's just so refreshing to see that we all have our different hopes and dreams. I also wanted #2 to be a boy so they could grow up with a same sibling bond. Too special. And I get your "fear" of girls but if this is a girl you will do things so differently. And her older brother will create a completely new dynamic

 

[Wish85]

We're only having two so that's another reason I want another boy rather than a pigeon pair. I'd rather DS grow up with a brother but healthy is the main thing obviously

 

[MemmaJ]

It's funny isn't it, how it isn't always the 'opposite' gender that people desire as people expect.
So when will you know Wish..? I seem to remember you and I were due the same day(or almost) and then you got put forward a bit, so you must be 18-ish weeks now...?!

Yes I don't tend to throw it out there that I'm a Midwife really, because then I loose my license to ask stupid questions, haha! All logical midwifery sense goes out the window when you're pregnant yourself (me worrying about movements even though I have an anterior placenta is just one example!).
I'd actually love to train in Ultrasound though CMC - I've been looking at medical ultrasound courses (including obstetrics) but they're so expensive (around £3,000)

I think what I might do is put the feelers out when I go back to work next week... ask colleagues if they know how I can go about it, without doing it through my own midwife.
I'll still have to see her after I've had the baby though as she'll be my postnatal midwife, so it could still potentially be pretty awkward..!

 

[sil]

Two hours to go!!! I slept horribly last night.

 

[Bevziibubble]

Sorry about the bad sleep hun. Good luck for today

 

[Wish85]

It's funny isn't it, how it isn't always the 'opposite' gender that people desire as people expect.
So when will you know Wish..? I seem to remember you and I were due the same day(or almost) and then you got put forward a bit, so you must be 18-ish weeks now...?!

Yes I don't tend to throw it out there that I'm a Midwife really, because then I loose my license to ask stupid questions, haha! All logical midwifery sense goes out the window when you're pregnant yourself (me worrying about movements even though I have an anterior placenta is just one example!).
I'd actually love to train in Ultrasound though CMC - I've been looking at medical ultrasound courses (including obstetrics) but they're so expensive (around £3,000)

I think what I might do is put the feelers out when I go back to work next week... ask colleagues if they know how I can go about it, without doing it through my own midwife.
I'll still have to see her after I've had the baby though as she'll be my postnatal midwife, so it could still potentially be pretty awkward..!

Mem I find out on the 30th Jan I dislike how people assume if it's another boy I'll be disappointed because I won't have one of each. People have said to me already 'did we try for a girl this time?'...no, we tried for a baby lol. They did push me forward 5 days at the nuchal scan but midwife said they go by dating scan so I'm back to 17+2

Sil the suspense is killing us!

 

[_Meep_]

I think everyone was expecting me to want a boy this time too, so I'd have one of each. And before I got pregnant, that WAS what I wanted ... then it happened, and I was just so sure it was a girl that I really got used to the idea. Then I saw its obviously girly nub and I was even more convinced, so I would have felt really confused and like I'd lost something by finding out it was a boy. I am so glad she's a little chick. My 2 year old wanted a girl too, so it's perfect. OH was initially shocked as he had been sure we would hear boy but he admitted afterwards that with both our children he wanted a girl. He is devoted to our LO so I am sure he will feel just the same about this one. I love besotted daddies and their little princesses.

 

[Dannypop]

And that's what makes gender disappointment so much worse -everyone else's societal expectations. That one of each is the ultimate goal. I love that there are moms who only want boys or only want girls. That's why I am loving much little social experiment in keeping the gender a secret. Everyone's guesses and hopes for us. Ha!

Mem ha ha I love why you keep your profession a secret so you can ask silly questions! Love that. But isn't it true with all things in life that when it comes to our selves we are blind but can easily assess and help others

SIL you must be getting ready to go in!!! Hooray!

 

[sil]

On our way there now! DH is driving. DS1 doesn't understand fully and keeps saying it'll be a girl and a boy, haha. Half an hour until the appointment

 

[MemmaJ]

Oh wow so we are the same again Wish - I'm 17+2 today too! How exciting!

OMG I'm so anxious for you SIL, all the sicky feelings of my own scan day are coming back!

 

[_Meep_]

sil, I am so excited and nervous! I hope it's the news we all want for you!!!!