Donor Sperm IUI/IVF- 2012

[MrsC8776]

WANBMUM~ The last IUI I had my DH couldn't be there. He works in Afghanistan and it just happened that the IUI would be when he was working. He was also gone when I tested. He was very hopeful for us and asked how things were going everyday. It was different him not being there but it was ok. Of course we all want our DH's to be there but sometimes it isn't possible. How does he feel about it?

Sunup~ Sounds like everything is going great! You will be at ER in no time. I'm glad the stimming is going so well for you.

 

[raelynn]

Wanbmum - I had my husband there this last time since I wanted him to feel included but it was kind of awkward. There really wasn't much room for him to stand and not be in the way and he said he was kind of uncomfortable and didn't really know where to go or do. If this round doesn't work, I'd probably give him the choice of whether he wanted to come again or not.

 

[WANBMUM]

Thanks mrs c. My oh is willing to do whatever for us to have a baby, as I am. I guess I'm looking at it as a big significant event, which it is, but in reality it's just another step I guess. I can go to scans/tests on my own so I guess I can this too.

Raelynn, has your clinic not set out a place for a partner in the room? Our 2 precious they have a chair right beside the clinic bed. Your poor hubby, feeling like a spare part. Sounds like how men describe childbirth! Hehe

 

[deafgal01]

Think it would be weird not having my dh there. For my first one, I would want him to be there if possible.

 

[raelynn]

Yeah, our clinic rooms are really small. There is an extra chair in there but it is in the corner right where the doctor sits and that was just weird. My hubby didn't want to be down there in the way or watching everything so he just stood by my head. The IUIs are done in the same rooms as the ultrasound monitoring so they just aren't very roomy.

 

[Redhead7211]

Stalker here! My DH went to our first IUI, the second I went alone due to work obligations. I thought I would be fine with it, considering he's really just there for support. I was very anxious going in and I think it would have made me feel better if he were there. For this one I think he will come with. We are lucky because our clinic room has more than enough space for him to be there. He's not one of the husbands that want to catch an eyeful of the action. It was a comfort having him there though!

 

[HollyTTC]

My husband couldn't come for our last DIUI, but I brought a girlfriend along with me. She didn't come in the room, but just having someone there for the long drive back and forth really helped.

I'm 11DPO today and I'm gonna test tomorrow, but I think I'm out anyway

A DNC is where they actually clean our your uterus. Just like you would if you had a miscarriage. I've heard it can really help, but I've never heard it mentioned on this thread and was just wondering what your thoughts were.

 

[CanadianMaple]

I don't think I could do it without DH, but I have wanted him at every appointment and am big at talking things through. He's made the comment before that we don't even need him there anyway in a sad way once, so I think it would make him feel more included.

Holly- Good luck! I don't think you're out yet!

Redhead- Welcome! I can totally relate.

SunUp- I'm glad you stuck around. You'll be in that 2ww soon!

Deafgal- I remember thinking that things were almost moving too fast which shocked me because I had wanted to get started months before. We ended up being delayed and I was devastated, but I think I did need that extra processing time.

I changed the title of this group. I definitely want to include all who are using assistive reproductive technology. I didn't feel like I really related with the at-home with a local donor, I wanted to talk through the choosing the donor at the sperm bank and all the meds and procedures.

 

[silverbell]

Question? Would you or have you had DIUI without your partners being there?
If I have to have IUI next week, due to work commitments my OH wont be able to attend the IUI. Would you guys find this weird? Of course I would prefer if he was there but in the circumstances as you ladies will understand is it normal for me to feel weird.

It's completely normal to feel this way, as I felt the same. On my 5th IUI DH told me he couldn't go as he had a hospital appointment he'd waited ages for. I was so torn - I wanted him to have his appointment but at the same time I wanted him with me for the IUI. As the date got nearer I started freaking out a bit and panicking that it felt a bit 'wrong' for me to go off to a clinic and have donor sperm put in me without him being there (even though he'd signed the consent!) Plus I worried that if it did turn into a BFP that he might feel a bit odd about it, as he wasn't there at that critical moment if you see what I mean? Anyway, the day before he decided he didn't like the idea of it either and he could see how much it was bothering me so he rearranged his appointment and came with me. I felt so relieved.

I know I'd have been fine without him but I think it was just all the thoughts that you get carried away with that make you think you won't be.

Hi Gals, sorry I have been missing in action. After my last cancelled IUI I really needed a break mentally and I must say I have switched off and rested my head

I completely understand this. After our abandoned IUI early on due to over-stimulation I was a complete mess. I was more upset than I've been with any of the BFNs. I think more because the choice was taken from me and you feel you've just wasted your time with all the injections and scans all for nothing.

I'm glad the break did you good.


Good luck, Holly! Keeping everything crossed for you

 

[WANBMUM]

Thanks silverbell. Yes it is so important to take a well deserved break, mentally we all need it. This journey really is so challenging at times and everything gets too much. Looking back in a strange way, I have looked at the cancelled cycles as 'breaks'.

How are you silvervell? I wish you so much luck, Im really hoping this is your lucky one....

 

[raelynn]

Feeling a little down today ladies. The 2ww is going by fairly quickly this time but I have absolutely no symptoms. I try not to symptom spot but I just don't feel pregnant. I didn't really feel pregnant after IVF but I had cramps off and on throughout so I thought that was a good sign and it turns out it was. I was on a whole lot of fertility drugs before the IVF procedure and afterwards and this has been a lot more natural but I'm still starting to think the worst. How do you all get through the ups and downs and the wait?

 

[deafgal01]

Still in with a chance. Some ladies don't always get cramping in the 2ww. Think positive. Are you doing anything to pass the time and staying busy?

 

[silverbell]

Thanks silverbell. Yes it is so important to take a well deserved break, mentally we all need it. This journey really is so challenging at times and everything gets too much. Looking back in a strange way, I have looked at the cancelled cycles as 'breaks'.

How are you silvervell? I wish you so much luck, Im really hoping this is your lucky one....

I'm OK but feeling down already as not expecting anything to have worked this time. I just feel like it'll never happen for us. We've had too many failures I think and there's only so long you can stay optimistic! I'm way past that. Oh well - you never know, eh?

Feeling a little down today ladies. The 2ww is going by fairly quickly this time but I have absolutely no symptoms. I try not to symptom spot but I just don't feel pregnant. I didn't really feel pregnant after IVF but I had cramps off and on throughout so I thought that was a good sign and it turns out it was. I was on a whole lot of fertility drugs before the IVF procedure and afterwards and this has been a lot more natural but I'm still starting to think the worst. How do you all get through the ups and downs and the wait?

It's still really early, raelynn. Also some ladies will have symptoms when they're very early on then the next time around they don't - each pregnancy seems like it can be very different. Sending lots of to you.

 

[CanadianMaple]

I had absolutely no symptoms when I was pregnant with my son until 5 weeks, other than missing my period. I got cramping and bloating after that though.

 

[esuzanne]

Hi girls! Keep your heads up! Just think how far we have all come!! My DH & I just left first DIUI and while I am hopeful, I don't want to get too excited. It's like I told DH, its kinda like when we were trying on our own before we found out about azo...if it doesn't work, we just have to try again! I do have a question for you ladies though. When I got up off the table (after laying flat about 15mins) I noticed some liquid under where I was sitting. Now I'm worried that maybe my doc messed up? Thoughts? Experiences?

 

[raelynn]

esuzanne- That has happened for me with both IVF and IUI. The docs told me they use a liquid medium to transfer the embryo (IVF) or sperm (IUI) through the catheter so some of that liquid tends to leak out.

deafgal - I haven't really been doing much to pass the time other than work but it is definitely going by faster than with IVF. I think because you have to be so much more structured and involved with every step for IVF, IUI just seems a lot more relaxed. Plus, our chances are so much lower with a single round of IUI that I don't really have my hopes up like I did for IVF.

 

[esuzanne]

Thanks raelynn! While I haven't done IVF I understand what you mean about it being relaxed and not getting your hopes up. Now I'm worried we timed it wrong bc I'm having awful cramps! I'm assuming (you know what they say about that haha) that the cramping is me ovulating which would mean we probably missed our chance. When do you test?

 

[WANBMUM]

Esuzanne, the liquid they say is where the catheter has disrupted your cervical mucus, it cant be swimmers as they have been placed so far up. Wishing you lots of luck

Silverbell, I can relate completely with you, it is so so hard to feel and remain positive when after years of heartache and disappointment, it really becomes alien to us. At times I feel really bad and down for being so pessamistic, like this frame of mind is stopping me from getting pregnant, then I get more depressed. Vicious circle.

I have my first scan tomorrow to see if I have any healthy follicles to proceed with iui. Please keep everything crossed for us.

 

[raelynn]

esuzanne - cramps can be a good sign too. I had them all through my 2ww after IVF.

I'm trying to wait to test until towards the end of the week. My beta is next Monday

 

[deafgal01]

Wan- crossing my fingers for you!