Funny Things Your Child Has Said!

[Seity]

"Daddy, cotton candy is like a hairball you can eat."

 

[MrsPear]

Yesterday on the bus Joni was shouting really loudly "Done a poo poo in my nappy! Want to touch my bottom! It's just truuuuumps!"

Today I was carrying her through the shopping centre and she glanced down and suddenly looked really excited, saying, "Hiyah, floor!"

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

On a car journey.

DD: Mummy, we 2, me and you have blonde hair don't we?
Me: Yes we do
DD: And daddy has black hair
Me: yes that's right, well done
DD: but mummy what colour hair did you have when you were little
Me: well first it was black, then it fell out and went blonde. That's what your hair did.
DD: oh, so we 2 had black hair, then we were bald and now we have blond hair?
Me: that's it exactly
DD: so what colour hair did daddy have before he had black hair
DH: I had blonde hair when I was little
DD: ok..... Does that mean you were a girl

 

[Bevziibubble]

Holly always says it's 'a man' who has done it, whenever she hears a loud noise, sees a mess in the street or spots a random breakage or something not quite right. It's so funny that she really has it in for this man!
Today I was taking her out for a walk in her pushchair and she suddenly announced 'I love man!' Awww!

 

[sheldonsmommy]

I let Sheldon have a few pistachios a while ago, and since has been asking for moustachios.

Seriously considering creating a cereal by that name!

 

[Foogirl]

Today I was carrying her through the shopping centre and she glanced down and suddenly looked really excited, saying, "Hiyah, floor!"

 

[AC1987]

DD1 has been saying so many funny things lately now that she can put two - three word sentences together. I have been working on potty training her, and she had pooped in her potty so I praised her and she watched me dump it into the toilet, so she says "bye bye poo poo"

 

[Noodlebear]

Lucas was petrified of the toilet flushing until we taught him to wave bye bye. Now everytime you flush you can hear him yell 'bye bye' and come running to wave lol.

 

[Natsku]

This probably falls more along the lines of disturbing rather than funny but the other day while we were swimming in the lake I heard Maria say to OH "lets put mummy to sleep in the deep (water)" - felt a tad scared!

 

[AngelofTroy]

Micah tripped over yesterday and said "Goodness snake!" in a really exasperated voice!

 

[MelliPaige]

I stayed the night with a friend to help her shuck, cut, and can some corn. Her dd3 said
"fewww! I work hard. Mama work hard. You work hard...but NOT daddy!" Haha
She also said "you staying here with me?" I said "yea" she said "no, you can go. Leo can stay. I momma Leo I momma" haha

She's a little behind in the speech department but she's a little comedian!

 

[Gaige]

I have been cackling like a maniac over this thread for ages - as has OH when I've read a few out to him.

But this:-

Whilst trying (and failing) to put on and stand in my high heels.

"This is bullshit"

This is the one that finished me off.
I couldn't breathe, my stomach is now killing me and the mental image I have is absolutely priceless.
Thank you for sharing that, every time I think about it I get the giggles.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/create/extension/

 

[AngelofTroy]

Today I was talking to my brother about my friend Sarah, and Micah very seriously says to me "Mummy? Is that Sarah that's in 'Sarah and Duck?" ... Sure, all my friends are Cbeebies characters..

And also the wind blew our letterbox and Micah asked me who was at the door, I said "nobody" and he replied "yeah-body! Mummy yeah-body at the door!"

 

[AngelofTroy]

LOUDLY in the changing room getting changed after swimming... "mummy izzat your nipples?" then after I confirmed that they were... "haha, your nipples look funny! Bumpy nipples! Mummy I want to touch them! I WANT TO HAVE YOUR NIPPLES! MAY I HAVE NIPPLES PLEASE!?!?!" He repeated the last bit at the top of his voice at least 10 times despite me having my bra on by then!

 

[Kate&Lucas]

Lucas asked me yesterday morning which animal lays apples
Apparently he's recently learned where eggs come from. I almost didn't want to ruin it by informing him that apples grow on trees!

 

[Bevziibubble]

When Holly saw daddy in the shower today, she announced 'I love daddy's boobies!'

 

[Natsku]

I asked Maria if she wanted some melon and she said "No thanks, because I'm a zombie" she also told me that zombies eat little babies. She scares me a little

 

[pandacub]

When tucking him In a few nights ago
'Mummy, if you leave me alone I will die"

WHAT

 

[FAB mama]

When tucking him In a few nights ago
'Mummy, if you leave me alone I will die"

WHAT

Oh gosh, I don't think I'd have been able to leave the room! Even if it is just one of those things toddlers say!

 

[SoBlessedMama]

Lol these are hysterical!

We are expecting DS #2 in October. I will have a c-section, and we explained to DS#1 what this meant. Then the other day we took him to a "big siblings class" in our hospital. (He is 4 years old.) As we walked in the door, he started LOUDLY announcing to the staff that we were there to, "Cut Davis outta Mama's belly so he can be my brother!" (Lol he was quite disappointed to learn that was NOT happening right then.)

Lol he has also repeatedly told people that after the doctor takes the baby out of my belly, they will sew a zipper in and zip me back up. Lol I really don't know how he came up with that part!