General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[pacificlove]

CB, you usually don't get much snow, do you? Good thing the stores are within walking distance to you! No slipping behind the stroller.

Gigs, yes, we still found our all inclusive worth it. DH and I don't drink that much either. A drink every now and then. Our resort had 6 different restaurants, all different types of kitchens: Mediterranean, italian, asian, local, etc. The all inclusive also included equipment rentals for water sports at the resort and we even had a couples massage included. There were 3 resorts from the same brand in st. Lucia, and we could take hotel provided transportation to the other resorts and enjoy all the amenities there too including the food . (OMG the food was soooo good there!!).

Glad to hear the nips are on the mend, sort off! What did you end up using on them? Cream wise?

Afm, had a super busy morning on my feet, little crampy tonight (but we also dtd last night and this morning ). Hopeful that something is happening. My mom isn't coming until next week Thursday... So I'll have to ask my mw what other parents do in my situation up here. It'll take my mom at least 5 hours to get here on short notice. Babies get born in less time then that.

 

[shaescott]

PL the German Christmas market sounds lovely! Would it have started mid-November? The wedding date is 11/12. I absolutely love Christmas, so I’d love that. I still haven’t taken down the hanging Christmas decorations in my dorm (took down the mini tree though).
Hoping baby comes at the perfect time for you!

Gigs glad things are improving a bit re: breastfeeding!

CB it’s supposed to snow here too, but of course it’s different storms considering we’re separated by the Atlantic Ocean

Re: all inclusive resorts, I’d definitely be interested in that, it’s something I’ll look into. It depends where we go. If it’s somewhere with amazing street food and city exploring, I’d be less likely to do all inclusive, cuz then I’d be staying on site and never leaving. If it’s kinda unsafe outside the resort in the area we go, that would be a different story. I’d love to go to Disney World, it’s my absolute favorite, but SO had a bad experience there the one time he went and therefore doesn’t like it, so it’s off the table. It has to be somewhere we both really want. I’ll make him go to Disney someday, but not for the honeymoon. I know nothing about Croatia, but being in the Mediterranean sounds lovely. Considering the wedding is now almost 4 years away instead of almost 3, we have even more of an excess of time to figure out where to go. I’m sure I’ll still ask him about it way earlier than necessary, though. I feel like it’s slowly hitting me, the reality of delaying it a year. It’s a bit sad and disappointing because I’ve been counting down to one date for years and now I get set back. But I know it’s the logical thing to do.

I should go to bed but I’m hungry and have leftover pizza in my mini fridge. So I might eat some then go to bed. I’m gonna try to start temping again since I don’t have a roommate this semester, so I gotta get to bed pretty soon. I’m gonna have the alarm at 8 am except on clinical days, I get up at 4:45 am those days, I figure as long as I go to bed earlier those nights it won’t totally f*ck it up. There’s no way I’m waking up at 4:45 every day to temp lol.

 

[pacificlove]

Dang, midwife just cancelled our appointment this morning, she's attending another birth. Wait until Wednesday or Thursday now.
Crampy this morning, they don't last long and are more distracting then anything else...

Shae: yes, I think by mid November you should be able to find some nice Christmas markets. Europe is so small, that you can very easily hop on a train or plane for cheap too and head to the Mediterranean for some sun right after. Youll arrive in no time

 

[gigglebox]

Shae are you still working part time? If you start saving now you may find you can afford it earlier than you're thinking. Would your families put any money toward a wedding or are you funding it all?

Pl eeeee so exciting! Could you ask your mom to come up earlier? Do you guys have a sitter? Or a trusted friend? Maybe another mom from the play group?

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Good morning ladies. Just a quick update on my phone before I start work. We stayed at my place last night and my laptop was at SO's, so it was hard to read and reply.

Opks are still negative, but I'm CD17 today, so they should be positive pretty soon. We DTD this morning, but I only had about 30 mins to lay there, unelevated, and let the sperm work it's way in before I needed to get ready for work. lol. Gonna try to do it again in a day or so.

Thanks for the comments. I still have my VCH piercing, but my Christina piercing was trying to migrate, so I took it out. Feel free to google that one, ladies. lol

And Alex's daycare is closed cuz of the weather. Thank God my mom is able to watch him.

 

[claireybell]

Haha pretty i just googled that one, i bet it looked pretty when it was in though, apparently it has a high rejection rate due to where its located ..

 

[gigglebox]

Grrr just bled onto the sheets -.-
Cb are you still bleeding? I hate the post partum bleed grrr

 

[Flueky88]

Pacific I like your new title from L oh and sorry your check got moved.

Shae it would be hard when you have a certain date in your head and it gets pushed farther back.

Gigs glad nips are improving slightly. Hope they adjust soon. How is he sleeping?? Oh I wondered if that was the couple with marital problems. Sounds like it's anyone's guess how it goes. That would be sad if she moved far enough that your BIL couldn't be around much. I grew up like that, seperated from dad and brother. Very difficult to deal with that distance.

Pretty oh dear ahhh too painful for me. If you get a positive in next day or two it's still in fertile window. FX he's not opposed to some BD.

 

[gigglebox]

He sleeps well but only if he's on me :/ I have been trying to get him to sleep in the co sleeper but no luck. I am going to keep at it but any suggestions on doing this successfully are appreciated!

The funny thing about bil is he thinks being separated by states will be fine because he says "I turned out fine." His folks were divorced and he had virtually no relationship with his dad. Or at least a very salty one. He is not seeing that correlation though. When he makes up his mind on things he becomes blind to all logic.

How are you feeling? Looking more and more like you'll be going full term this time!

 

[Flueky88]

Gigs I kinda hate when they won't sleep except when held. I'm afraid I'll drop or roll over on them. I tried my best not to hold all the time, but sometimes you gotta get some sleep. I used pacifier, white noise or lullaby for V. I also added a light projector when I moved her into nursery. Things didn't work all the time and I didn't let her CIO then, but I persisted. May have been her temperament too??

Ahh that's unfortunate he doesn't realize how hard it'll be on the boys especially if they have a good relationship. I hope he comes to his senses.

I'm okay. I slept terrible last night and S has been low today. Bowling ball in your pelvis feeling. Not too bad other than that. I'm thinking I'll make it somewhere in 37 weeks, but now I'll jinx myself and go to 41 weeks

Are getting snow today or tomorow. We had some. It didn't stick to roads but with cool down this evening I'm a bit worried it'll be icy.

 

[claireybell]

We’ve had some sleet showers this evening but its more freezing cold rainy now, it may snow overnight but not holding my breath! Thing is it’ll Freeze over & i gotta do school run with the buggy & we live in a hill, fx no ice!

Glad the nips aren’t as bad now Gigs, i stopped bleeding really quick around 2/3wks i think, ive been having cramps & odd dots of spotting here n there but i doubt il get a period as bf’ing, has your bleeding eased up since Myles arrived??

Re sleeping - Hayden sleeps on me no probs but u want your own snoozey break. Do you have any of those sleep sacks or ‘Gro-bags’? I have learnt through the others that they hate going onto a colder surface & it wakes them up, he gets all cosy in a sleep sack later in evening & after a late nappy change, after he dozes off on me il pop him in his basket, i have a very thin fleece covered blanket (tucked under his basket matress) that il lay him on so his head doesnt get cold aswell & just reeeeeally slowly lower him in & remove my hands super slow, cup his lil face for a few seconds after & then let go lol seems to work, seems really faffy but he’ll go for a few hrs in between in the night with that,

Urhhh Flueks the heavy pelvis feeling.. fx baby girl will arrive ontime & not overdue! Just tske it easy with moving about, def helps with the pain, just looking at your signature block, your 3 days off when V was born! I expect your abit anxious, were u feeling heavy & achey like this before she popped out?

 

[shaescott]

PL sorry about the appointment :/
That’s true, we may explore a few places in Europe, it’s definitely an option.

Gigs sorry about the BIL situation. Being far away from your kids is definitely not something you should choose, imo. Hopefully they work things out. Sorry about the bleeding as well

Unfortunately I’m not working part time right now. I just can’t manage it with the stress and time commitments of this semester. I have a tiny work study job 2.5 hours a week at $7.25 an hour just to pay for gas. I do plan to work a lot this summer and in subsequent summers, so we’ll see how much I can earn from that. My family will help a little for the wedding but my mom doesn’t really get how expensive weddings can be, hers was under $1,000 cuz she eloped, so I’m not expecting a ton of money from her. We’ll see I suppose.

Pretty hopefully that OPK turns positive soon! That piercing looks very pretty but also very painful.

Flueks sorry about the crappy sleep. Here we’re supposed to get snow this afternoon through tonight. I’m unamused because I have clinical tomorrow and my car isn’t great on snow.

Successfully did my first morning temping in forever, so that’s a win!

 

[pacificlove]

Shae, even if you can put away $20 a month now, it'll add up by the time it's wedding time. Weddings don't have to be expensive. Pretty sure studies have now shown that expensive elaborate weddings are less likely to turn into a long term successful marriage.

Gigs, i second sleep sacks. Or try to swaddle? I was so sad when L outgrew his.... We have 3 sleep sacks, 1 small handmade from fleece with long sleeves, one thick one that's actually too warm when baby comes into bed with us, and one with short sleeves and it's perfect in warmth and thickness and size. Came from Ikea of all places!
One other thing I liked about them: when they start outgrowing diaper sizes or leak at night, the mess doesn't hit the sheets unless it's a huge leak. Sleep sack is easier and faster to wash then my bedding

 

[shaescott]

PL we don’t want a crazy elaborate wedding. And I think the elaborate wedding correlating with divorces may relate to 2 big things: resulting debt, and being material people, people who care too much about money and how they look. My big splurge will be my dress, most other things I can do without. I don’t want a courthouse wedding, but I don’t need to be at some estate or winery either lol. I figured I’d get married at a church. Not sure where to have a reception, I want food and dancing but I figured instead of a DJ I’d rent speakers and set up someone’s phone with a playlist and I don’t need some super expensive caterer, I wanna find an affordable option for food. I don’t need a ton of decor either, it’s pretty but ultimately not important. SO wants a wedding cake and I want a photographer but a videographer isn’t necessary, even though wedding videos are gorgeous they’re just too expensive. Expenses still add up though, the average cost of a wedding in the USA is over $30K and I’m aiming for under $10K, we’ll see what I can do. I’d say I want my wedding to be a middle ground between eloping and crazy elaborate.
I honestly don’t have $20 a month to save right now. My work study income is going to gas and that’s about all it covers. I’ll be saving as much as I can during the summer, though. If I work enough I can probably make a huge dent in the costs, and once I get a job as a nurse of course I’ll save up what I can from that. But I’ll have living expenses then, so that’ll make it harder. I do have a hard time not spending money, going out to eat and ordering takeout is my weakness. I’ve been doing it much less lately simply because I can’t afford it.

 

[Flueky88]

CB as bad as it may sound, I'm kinda just hoping to make it to 37 weeks. I'm working til 40 weeks and I'm getting eager for time off. If leave was better in US I would probably start leave at 36 weeks. It is a bit odd thinking if I make it to Saturday I'll have cooked this girl longer. I think I'll make it though. I had a heavy pelvis feeling worse with V but think my job made it worse. I'm a bit more sedentary now.

Shae hope it doesn't get bad. I imagine the NE is much like Midwest that things rarely get cancelled. If it's bad better to make up a clinical than get injured. Maybe you could ride with someone??

Pacific I never got a sleep sack, but loved swaddling. V would always manage to get her arms free. She lived them by her face. Even in utero she had her hands by her face.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

shae - When it comes to tattoos, I just tell myself that the pain is temporary and only something I'll have to sit through once (for that area). Once your endorphins kick in, you'll be fine. And that's a nice shade of red. I could recommend when my dad used for dandruff back in the day, but it would probably just strip your hair faster: Palmolive dish soap. No lie. He swore by it. lol.

Re: wedding. Do you know anyone that could "gift" you services for your wedding? IF SO and I ever get married, I know a couple people who would probably offer to do hair and make up, SO's aunt makes awesome cakes, SO's uncle is a Reverend, I'd probably make my own centre pieces, etc. There's always ways to save money. I heard about a woman who had the names of the comapnies she used for cake and flowers and all that on the back of her wedding programs, like as sponsors.

Gigs - It really blows my mind how stubborn and lazy some people can be. Some grandparents would jump through any hoop to interact with they're grandkid and others totally take it for granted. How is he with your other boys?

PL - Sorry your appt got canceled. :/

AFM, I think today's opk looks damn close to positive. This morning was probably enough, but our last couple "encounters" have been kind of one-side (read: no foreplay for me), which is fine cuz it was banging for a purpose. So, I could probably say it's time for him to "pay me back" and then turn that into another BD session. lol. Oh, and I've had a decent amount of EWCM.

 

[gigglebox]

Pretty EWCM is a fantastic sign! You know the bd done a couple days ago sets you up for a girl they say...and baby making or no baby making, I'd definitely call in that owed favor!

My dad sucks as a grandparent all around. He's a little better with my oldest because they share a love for trains but that's about it. He doesn't put in much of an effort to visit or interact with the kids when he does visit. Mostly he sits on the couch.

Ladies thanks for the suggestions. He sis like swaddling before but I think I've ruined him annoying thing is i can lay him down and he'll be good for about 2-3 minutes, then he wakes up and cries. He's been my least cuddly baby, so part of me hust enjoys that he sleeps on me. I'd love to sprawl out and get a bit more comfy though...just now sure how to do this as what was working (swaddling, binky) no longer cuts it and I'm too tired to fight that battle. Probably best to try it first during a day time nap maybe?

Shae also, when the time comes, i'd look into seasonal jobs especially around the holidays. They are generally competitive with pay.

Fluek when will they start doing cervical checks?

 

[shaescott]

Flueks you imagined correctly I texted the two girls who I know already carpool but they haven’t responded. To be fair they might be asleep already since we have to get up so early.

Pretty yay for near positive OPK and EWCM! Get that !
That’s a good perspective on tattoos. I still definitely want a few despite my fear of pain. I’ll just want someone to come with me, is all.
I’m afraid I don’t know people who do services. SO wants his pastor he knew as a kid to officiate if he’s still alive at that point (he’s in his 80s), but I don’t expect him not to charge for it. My family doesn’t make things or provide services, my godmother works in a lab, my godfather works with computers, my aunt does psychology, my other aunt does anthropology, my other other aunt is a retired teacher, my uncle is a journalist... all I can think of is I have a cousin who plays piano amazingly, and I haven’t seen him in a few years, we’re not close enough for me to ask him to do it for free even as a gift considering the prep it would take to learn to play all the ceremony songs, and I don’t know if a piano would even be available at the church. It’s a great thought though.

Gigs I would work seasonal, but I’m only home mid-December to mid-January, and most seasonal jobs are November through December. I was practically offered a job last year at Bed Bath and Beyond at the mall near my college but you have to be available for Black Friday and Christmas Eve, and the dorms are closed during holidays, we have to go home. Also the seasonal workers there get paid less than the regular workers, but idk if that’s a normal thing. So I’m just gonna try really hard to get a job this summer. I may get my CNA/LNA license so I can work at a nursing home, otherwise I’d love to do waitressing, according to nurse recruiters it looks good on resumes.

Hoping to go to bed soon. I went to the gym and had to wear my coat back because of the cold and snow, and the coat smelled kinda meh after so I threw it in the wash. The dryer cycle should be done soon but it was kinda soaked from the washer so I’m concerned I may have to run it again in the dryer. For some reason I couldn’t do as much at the gym as last time, I did 1.5 miles last week on the treadmill and this week I had to stop at 1.1 miles, I just felt so crappy. But at least I did something, I suppose.

 

[shaescott]

Coat update: it did indeed need more time in the dryer. Fx’d it doesn’t need 3 cycles cuz at that point I might just hang it up and pray it dries while I sleep.

 

[ErinC]

wow a lot of chatter since I checked in last, been a crazy couple of days
Shaescott don't blame you, we don't want a fancy wedding either & good luck with the temping
PL I know what you mean about distance. my mum decided to plan and book a trip to Germany RIGHT when I am due. still haven't told her, waiting for 8 week scan all clear so I totally know what you're going through. I live 6 hrs away from family but as our stupid town isn't equip for delivery we get kicked out at 8 months lol
pretty GOOD LUCK!

I currently run a business with my partner & he also works 6 months of the year. Plus we are also studying a course together. its already hectic I have no idea how I'm going to cope if this bean stays with me.
took blood today, waiting for results Friday. still crampy and my nipps feel like they have been sandpapered. for some reason I cannot sleep and I feel cranky and irritable. No bleeding as of yet and AF was due today.