General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[DobbyForever]

Oooo nice! Well hopefully you can snag a 3 bedroom. If not, I’m sure you can make a 2 bedroom work

it’s a good problem to have though. I feel really fortunate that I can have these options because I know not everyone does. Just boils down to
1. Stay put and reassess next spring
2. Sell and try to buy a small home
3. Sell, move to the duplex, and hang onto the cash
4. Move to the duplex and rent out my place

The pressure being now is a fantastic time to sell in my area. My house is back up in value to pre pandemic and houses are selling like mad. So if I choose any plan that involves selling then I should make that move now. I just want to do right by A. He is so all about running around and being outdoors.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Just caught up on several days worth of posts and I'm tired, so I'm gonna to my best to remember everything and reply.

shae - FX things go smoothly with the roommate while you're all cohabitating. Maybe put a chain lock on the front door and lock it when you know he'll be out of the house for a bit, so you and SO can have naked cuddles on the couch? lol. Don't really have that issue with me and SO. I have zero interest in being nude except to shower and I literally haven't seen SO shirtless in at least 8 years.
Re: motivation. Can't really help you there, BUT I read something online a while ago about a girl who whenever she thought something negative about herself, imagined it was Trump saying it and was all "Oh, ya? Well, you dunno what the hell you're talking about. I'm awesome." It's worth a try, I guess. And I feel you one not wanting to be out exercising when it's cold. Thank God it's gotten nice and warm here too. Alex can actually get out on his bike without needing mittens and a jacket. Hopefully you and SO can figure out a gym groove that works for you both.

Dobby - Wow, definitely lots to consider. Debatably, owning proper is always a good thing. And when you have kids and dogs, yard space is definitely a plus. I hope the discussion with your mom and bro goes well and you all figure out the best situation for everyone.
Do you have time to get off the BCP, get a donor, and TTC this July, or will your first attempt be next year? That sucks that it took so long for A, but all it takes is one good day in one good cycle and you'll get a LO in just 9 months. Keeping my FX for a speedy conception for you.

AFM, SO has used "if" again a few times when talking about baby #3. I think it's just his way of processing the situation though. Cuz he'll say "If we have a third..." and then start talking about a larger SUV he's looked into, or who's gonna room with who, and why it's better to have the baby in our room to start cuz of where the sun hits the house in the morning. Like, he'll never say "I want to have another baby", but the fact that he's bringing it up and we're discussing ideas is really good for him.
In other news, due to a couple positives and the variants and an abundance of caution, the kids' daycare decided to close for 2 weeks. SO picked them up at 2:30 this past Wednesday and the centre won't open again until June 3rd, at the earliest. No one in their classes are positive, so that means I don't have to stay home from work. Luckily, SO is usually not so busy in the mornings, so he can watch them while working and my mom comes by around noon for naps and until I get home. Another tiny saving grace is that it's a long weekend here this weekend, so they only need to be watched for 9 days instead of 10 (2 days on, 3 days off, 4 days on, 2 days off, 3 days on). My province is also talking about lifting restrictions slowly. Really hoping we'll be allowed to have 25 people in outdoor gatherings by Alex's BDay.
Lastly, I've really getting into organizing things (mainly in the kitchen), like in The Home Edit. I picked up a couple plastic 18-egg holders from Kitchen Stuff Plus today and already love them, so I just put in an order for another $120 worth of stuff I'll be picking up in store tomorrow. I'm crazy. lol

 

[shaescott]

Dobs ah yes I’ve heard it’s a seller’s market these days. I hope you can give A that big yard to run around in.

Pretty I think we’ll just stick to the bedroom, but we’re very used to being naked around each other. We both sleep naked. Whenever I think “meh I could leave on my underwear” I’m like “crap I need to temp vaginally, nevermind” I prefer minimal to absent clothing while sleeping though, it just gets bunched up in annoying places and makes it harder for me to fall asleep. Our routine at my house at bedtime is go to my bedroom, immediately take off all clothes, climb into bed. It’s the first thing we do when we get in there, whether we’re actually going to sleep right away or not. It’s habit at this point. It’s just comfortable and makes us feel physically closer. I don’t feel the need to walk around naked in general, I just am used to walking around my house in a bra and underwear cuz the only man around is my dad and he doesn’t care as long as we’re (as in my sister and I) not naked lol. During hot summer days he’ll walk around shirtless if need be, although the AC we got last summer has reduced the need for that. I feel like Americans are usually much more conservative about modesty than that but I’ve been at SO’s house and seen his 19 year old brother walking around just in briefs, fully aware that I’m in the house. Once he walked into the kitchen and his dad was like “uh Shae’s here” and he was like “okay? She’s been around for like a decade, I don’t care anymore”

That’s hilarious (and creative) about the imagining Trump is saying it I can just imagine swapping it into his voice and being like “you sound ridiculous”.

How warm has it been up there lately? The past few days have been pretty warm here, yesterday it got up to 88 (31 C) which is insane, today it’ll be 86 (30 C). I hate that level of heat, give me 70 (21 C) and partly cloudy any day (even at 70 a super sunny day can be hell, my graduation day was and we were sweating our butts off in the sun), but once it hits 80 (27 C) I’m out, I’m sitting next to an AC. Last summer I had to go to an outdoor masked event and it was like 86 degrees, and it was so hot and humid that having the mask on felt like I was suffocating, it was like I had a cloud in my mask from the moisture, I had to leave a bit early because I felt so crappy. Next week we get a cooling off period where it’ll go down to a high of 63 (17 C) for a day but it’ll creep back up pretty past in the ensuing days. If not for the expected rain on the 63 degree day, I’d say that would be a perfect day for a long outdoor walk, since I get overheated easily.

Re: gym groove, I brought SO to my gym (planet fitness) yesterday and he hated it because it’s all machines and dumbbells, there’s no free barbells at all so it’s isolated exercise, no stabilization muscles being used. I use the smith machine for squats and stuff but I know it’s not as effective as a free barbell. However I did leg day yesterday with the smith machine and a few machines like the leg press, and as soon as I woke up this morning I could feel my legs lol, it was definitely effective in that way.

It really sounds to me like your SO is actively planning for the high likelihood of another baby. I deal with things similarly I think, when I know there’s something coming up that makes me nervous (though isn’t bad), I plan excessively. I’ve been planning excessively for getting an apartment. Getting an apartment is a good thing and I’m excited about it, but it’s also financially stressful, so I’ve got a whole spreadsheet listing things I’ll need to buy and monthly expected costs. I also have a bunch of saved apartment complexes on a realtor app. I found a 3 bed 1 bath for only $1500 which in that area isn’t bad at all, and a 2 bed 2 bath for like $1300. Having a master bathroom would be f*cking awesome, I wouldn’t have to put on clothes to go pee in the middle of the night. Anyway, back to your SO. If he reacts the way I do, he may actually be excited and looking forward to another baby, or at the very least okay with it/accepting of it. I wish my SO did more planning in advance lol, he tends to put off those things until he already needs to have a plan.

Re: COVID closure oof I’m sorry, I’m glad your SO is able to watch the boys and it’ll all work out. Here in MA (a liberal state, for reference) the governor is ending all closures and lifting the mask mandate except for in schools and healthcare settings on May 29th.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Good for you for being so comfortable in your own skin. I'm north of 200lbs right now, so don't no one wanna see any of this without clothes. lol

That's too bad SO isn't a fan of your gym. The gym I used to go to has machines, free weights, barbells, the whole shebang. I kinda miss it, but I can't justify the cost and/or time away from the kids. And I don't want to give up what little free time I have when they're sleeping. Maybe when they're older, I can have a better work/life/exercise balance. But for now, I'll just need to rely on work and walks.

My SO isn't always the best planner either, but like I said, all this talk is good. I was gonna ask him yesterday if he was saying IF cuz he doubted my fertility, but Alex was beckoning me to the bathroom to wipe his butt. Such a glorious life I lead. lol

Ya, the closure sucks, but were making it work. Thousands of people are getting vaxxed everyday, so hopefully the end of all this is in sight for us.

Here's what we can expect for today and the next several days. It got real hot real quick for May. Looks like it'll cool of a little next week, but those high temps are fairly average for the middle of summer.

 

[shaescott]

Pretty lol @ glorious life.

We’re set to open fully in MA a week before we’re expected to hit 75% of adults in MA fully vaccinated. We started off rocky but now we’re doing really well with getting people vaccinated quickly. In comparison, NH started off strong but their overall rates now are subpar compared to MA. My whole family is now fully vaccinated, including my 16 year old sister.

It appears we’ve got a similar range of temps going on.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Must be nice. We're supposed to be enter stage 1 (below) on June 14th and they're hoping we'll only need to be in each stage for about 21 days before moving to the next.

So, I picked my Kitchen Stuff Plus order and I love it. Under my kitchen sink looks so much better, the pop can dispenser is so cute and useful. Also picked up some berry storage containers and cute lunch bags for each kid (though Matthew won't need his for another 2 years, lol). You know you're old when storage stuff makes you super happy. lol

In other news, MIL has decided to gift us with some really nice patio furniture. It's been ordered and should arrive in a few weeks.

 

[DobbyForever]

Gonna try my best... just took another muscle relaxer. The pain is so f*********

Pretty so sorry about the closure but that’s really awesome that you have all worked out a system. That’s some great teamwork! I think the if is just a guy brain thing. We see pregnancy as a when but they see it as if. He’s clearly got it on the brain and making plans. Sounds to me like it is really a when in his mind. And it does make it less of a scary thing. I’m doing the same like if I get pregnant in July of this year, this is what I’d do. If that makes sense.

and yikes! It’s jumping back and forth here between like 65 and 75. Which is annoying. Sometimes I’ll check it so I can dress A and it will predict 62 but then it ends up being close to 80 ffs. Temperamental weather much?

Shae LOL I used to love pantless days or shirtless days. Dunno that I’ve walked around nude. Ironically my bro just did a towel and asked his twin’s gf to fetch him clothes today after the twin specifically told him to not be naked cuz his gf was over. Bro claimed he had a towel and therefore was not naked. Lol. My brothers walk around in boxers. It annoys me but whatever. Do you get up at night? You could just hang a robe by the door or somewhere to toss over if you’re getting something at night but still want to sleep naked. I’ve slept naked with my bf with a roomie before. But yeah you couldn’t really just waltz around all day lol unless you know he’s like out out.

It does stink but I get it re gym. Planet fitness is a more laid back, casual situation. But plenty of other things to do.

re house and baby. Went to the open house and it’s not for me. The neighbors have their political views all over their house, and they don’t align with mine. Plus what I have to give up for what I’m gaining isn’t worth it. Owning is always best but I thought the tax law said I’m only exempt from tax on property profit if I buy in the same tax year. So I could hang on to the cash and keep my eyes on the market. Having it in my account versus tied up in a property I have to sell makes me a much more appealing buyer. It’s nearly impossible in this market to buy with a selling contingency. I’ll keep an eye on the market and see what my preapproval says but I probably won’t be buying. If I sell, my stepdad will list it for me but I have to sell it. And idk I’m just not in the mood for that rn.

re baby golly honestly all this drama with my accident and houses and TB being cute while he’s on his boys’ trip has my ovaries quiet at LOL. I think a lot of it was just surge of hormones from missing a pill near ovulation. Body was like BABY TIME. I finish my pack next week which would give me one full cycle off of bcp before a cycle I would want to try but I don’t like those odds, I don’t have 1500 laying around atm, and if kids aren’t required to wear masks idk if I want to be pregnant at work with 30 kids who have hung out with who knows who. I do 90% of my instruction in small groups so super up close and personal. Idk. In any case I have like a week to decide hahaha and if I go off then I have to use condoms because I know we would fail at the pullout method and I’m enjoying the status quo

 

[DobbyForever]

Oh CA gov said he’s getting rid of his weird a* tier system mid June. Dunno how that affects things. But I know there was a threatened recall so he had to do something to appease the masses

pretty preach about the storage solutions! I so feel you lol and yay patio furniture! I almost got some but these damn stray cats!!!! People started feeding them in their patios because the new hoa is cracking down so now they keep coming over the fence ugh. But I love the patio set! And Marie Kondo would be proud of your under sink area!

 

[shaescott]

Pretty oh wow, you guys have been much smarter up there. We’ve had indoor dining for several months now, and reduced capacity indoor church and recreational stuff (with masks). Gotta say, it would’ve been smarter not to, our infection rates weren’t great over the past several months. The more strict rules up there probably saved a good number of lives.

The area under my sink looks just like the before picture haha, the after looks so nice and organized! Also the soda organizer looks so helpful, we don’t have soda often but when we do it’s just loose rolling around in there. That patio furniture is so pretty, I hope it’s super comfy when it arrives!

Dobs I’m so sorry you’re still having pain from the accident

Re: weather, wow, I can’t believe it’s been hotter here than in your area, we’ve been hitting 88 and this is New England. I really hate when it’s like 55-60 in the morning and then 70+ mid-day because I can’t wear shorts when it’s 55 but I can’t wear long pants when it’s 70 (unless it’s super cloudy).

If we get a place with only one bathroom I’m planning to put a command hook by the bedroom door for my bathrobe. I just requested more info about one that’s 2 bed 2 bath because I want it and my mom said she’d legit pay for the first few months if I had to get it now to get it at all lol, she was excited by the 2 bathroom thing.

Sorry the house wasn’t what you wanted. I hate when people have political signs everywhere in their yard/on their house, one sign per candidate is sufficient. I see so many of the same exact sign all over a yard. I just don’t understand why someone would have 20 signs several months after the election, like your candidate either won or lost, it’s over. We probably have like one sign we forgot to take down at the top of our driveway although it was for a state election, not presidential, so I think it’s a bit less anger-inducing for dissenters who pass by lol. Re: your stepdad, what ever happened with your mom filing for divorce?

Hm that’s not very much time to decide. Baby brain says do it, but my logical brain says wait a year all things considered. Kids are virus magnets as it is. On the other hand, you’re fully vaccinated, right? I’d still say probably best not to due to lack of funds, though. But obvi it’s up to you and we’d all be thrilled to see you through another pregnancy.

AFM waiting impatiently for the board of nursing to approve me to take the NCLEX. They’ve definitely received my application, though, because previously if I searched my name in the license lookup nothing appeared, today I searched and it has me listed as pending status for an RN license. Seeing that made me very excited lol. At this point it’s just waiting for the dang background check to go through, which could take up to 8 weeks

Despite just going to planet fitness rather than a “real gym”, my leg day yesterday was definitely effective, because boy are my legs and butt sore today. I woke up this morning and without even moving I could feel the muscle soreness. I took today off to rest. Hopefully I can get myself to the gym for arm day tomorrow. I’m definitely not ready for another leg day, I still have a slight waddle stance going down stairs.

 

[shaescott]

Today I woke up to spotting + temp drop and since like 4 pm I’ve had a headache + general malaise. Fun. I’m not mad about the not pregnant thing, I would hate to have morning sickness while trying to take the NCLEX, and that would make having a roommate much more complicated. I’ve been looking at apartment options and even with a co-signer I have to make 2.7x the rent. If I work 40 hour weeks, I will be able to reach that. But if I do 36, I won’t. SO and his friend will add to it but they can’t really start working in NH before we get an apartment unless they want to drive an hour one way to work for a while. Which I guess they could do, but that would suck, especially if they have a minimum wage job that gives them 4 hour shifts or something. So, fingers crossed I can get 40 hours (or more than $28 an hour, that would work too lol).

 

[DobbyForever]

Reading but in so much pain

Can someone’s parent co-sign? My mom co-signed for my college apartment but I made all the payments and was the only one on the lease.

That’s I can get out sorry

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Dobby - Sorry you're in so much pain. Are the muscle relaxers not working well?

shae - Ya, on paper our plan looks good, but we've had surges here and there. All the restrictions we have right now are cuz of surges and people not following the rules. The mayor of Toronto just said today that he's optimistic that this past long weekend will be our last long weekend in lockdown. Our next long weekend will be the first weekend of July, so here's hoping
Would you consider an over-the-door set of hooks instead of a command strip? More hooks, able to hold more weight, and zero chance of wall damage. Just my 2 cents. Keeping my FX that you can find something affordable for the 3 of you and that the nursing board approves you soon. And I hope you're feeling better now.

I hope Flueky and all you other regular posters/lurkers are doing well.

AFM, had some serious EWCM outta nowhere this morning. I'm only on CD12/32. I did an OPK the next time I used the bathroom and it was definitely negative. So, I dunno what was going on there.
SO's cousin has offered to help us dig up some bushes in the backyard that we wanna get rid of next weekend. And, once they're gone, I wanna get a raised planter big enough to grow strawberries and blueberries.
And we have a delivery date of June 11th for the patio furniture.

 

[shaescott]

Dobs is the pain getting worse? It sounds like it’s hitting you really hard, have you spoken to your doctor about the continued pain?
Re: co-sign, it’s income 2.7x the rent *with* a co-signer. Without one you need income 4x the rent. My mom will co-sign for me.

Pretty hopefully the mayor’s prediction comes true. Over the door hooks could also work. Only thing is if the door is tight to the top of the frame it’ll leave marks on the frame, when dorming I tried to use an over the door mirror and it was too tight, it scratched the top of the door frame and shifted all the time. I’ll have to see what the situation is when I actually get the apartment.

Interesting about the EWCM. I tend to get small amounts randomly but not large amounts, so idk.

A garden of berries sounds lovely! I’d love to grow berries in the future when I have a house.

Yay for furniture delivery date!

AFM headache seems to be gone, I woke up at midnight when SO texted me and the vibration woke me up. Usually it doesn’t, so I must’ve been in a light sleep phase. I fell asleep early though due to the headache, like 8 pm.

I’ve been eating pretty terribly lately, lots of coffee and not a lot of food, so no wonder I’ve been having headaches. I feel kind of nauseous and crappy. SO thinks I’m dehydrated because my lips are dry, but honestly they always are so idk. My capillary refill time is good, at least. I’ll probably try increasing my fluids anyway. Though the real issue I think is the food, I just haven’t been super hungry lately but I know I’m not eating nearly enough.

 

[DobbyForever]

pretty I think it’s normal to get ewcm days before o cuz it comes with your estrogen rise tat precedes o by up to four days. Are you planning to try this cycle or still waiting? The backyard plans sound great! Super excited for you

Shae that’s crazy. Here, people don’t ask for proof of income. But you usually have to pay at least first month if not first and last upfront along with a security deposit. But a co-signer literally means you will pay if they don’t, so end of day by Cali’s rules they’d consider her income to qualify you. I was unemployed in college and didn’t disclose that I had inheritance. In any case hope it works out!

relaxers aren’t working as well as they have in the past and I don’t want to keep taking them. I can’t take them when I work or have to watch A. The pain is pretty dull constantly but when I zoom I have to slouch to avoid being in pain and I can’t stand for more than a few minutes. But I have s* to do so well

 

[shaescott]

Dobs we also need to pay at least first and security deposit, if not also last. They only care about the income of the people living in the apartment for the 2.7x thing. I imagine the co-signer needs to make 4x, it wasn’t specified, but luckily I don’t need to worry about it with my mom.

 

[DobbyForever]

I’m blanking did you apply already? If so, when will you hear back? Fxed I’m glad your mom will co-sign though. I think California is just sue happy lol

speaking of California weirdness pumped gas today and thought of you

I’m ok when I wake up but I have to be on my feet. Like I had to take A to school, get fruit from the grocery store, get gas, I have to take him to speech later. Like honestly I’m already in pain and it’s not even 8. I can’t fall asleep or stay asleep so I’m irritable. I can’t walk the dogs or cycle or do my exercises coupled with eating like shit cus I can’t stand long enough to cook. I told my doctor I want to talk to a pt. I’m scared because I have chronic pain in my ankle, thumb, and trap from previous injuries. I can’t live like this.

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae thought of our gas convo this morning. And this was with a $0.20 discount per gallon cuz I used my safeway rewards haha

ETA wtf is happening in that meme?!?! I never looked at it closely that’s disturbing

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I haven’t applied yet because I need a pay stub first.

I’m so sorry you’re in so much pain. PT could definitely be beneficial. I hope you can get in fast.

Wow I haven’t seen it over $4 here since partway through the Obama presidency. As for the meme, I’ve seen the template many times before, I’m pretty sure it’s from a movie. Honestly I don’t find it disturbing because I know it’s fictional and I’ve only seen it in the context of the meme, so I view it metaphorically.

AFM I’ve had a long day, got a splinter so deep I needed to go to the doctor for lidocaine to remove it with a scalpel. Also some jerk from CA ordered chipotle by hacking my account and using my saved debit card. $130 of chipotle, ugh. Luckily I contacted chipotle and they refunded me.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Dobby - So sorry that you're dealing with all that pain. -.- Was your Dr able to set you up with an appt with a PT?
Not gonna be trying this cycle. The next time I get AF, I'll probably let SO know and tell him what my EDD would potentially be. I don't think he cares about the dates as much as I do, but he may have a pro or con to consider.

shae - Jeeeez! That sucks about your splinter. but good for Chipotle to refund you. Is your eating/caffeine consumption any better?

Re: Meme backstory. It's from some (mini) movie called The Ballad of Buster Scruggs. James Franco's character was in a noose earlier in the movie, but got saved. Later on, he was in the gallows with those 3 other guys. Never seen it, but I think it's supposed to be a comedy, kinda.

AFM, got an email last night saying the daycare got the all clear to reopen the next day, so the boys went back today. Thank God!
I also now know why I was getting that EWCM. I did an OPK after work today and it was pretty damn positive. I did 2 more this evening and it looks like it's coming down now. I am not amused. I've been getting my peaks on CD19 or 20, but today is only 14. Babydust method says I should aim to BD 2.5-3 days before my surge, so I was planning on doing it on like CD16 or 17 in my future cycles. A random peak this early is seriously no bueno for my tracking. Just gotta keep my FX that this is some random thing that doesn't happen again.

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae daaaang they are not playing around over there! They want your pay stub?! That's nuts! I've only ever had to give my paystub to two organizations: courts to calculate my child support and my mortgage broker to approve me for a loan/mortgage. I can't imagine having to fork it over to rent a place. Sorry the logistics are holding things up. Hopefully it works out that you can apply and get it or a similar unit or an even better one!

Yikes! So sorry about the splinter and the chipotle! glad you got your money back though. Have you thought about getting a student credit card instead? It's great cuz it's A- not really your money if it gets stolen and usually they have great protections as well plus B- you build credit. When my ex doesn't owe me months of child support, my credit is honestly 840/850. But it's largely because I have had a credit card since I was 18 and started building my credit super young. Just a thought.

Pretty awww that's nice of you to try and get his opinion on the EDD in case he has any. Hopefully he doesn't and you can just go for it.

Re meme: Oooo lol I mean I assumed it was a comedy because James Franco. fun fact, he's an a** in real life. He was at UCLA my first year and was just an arrogant turd and talked down to everyone in the class that he shared with my friend. Eye roll. But yeah I was just like whoa noose and I didn't want to offend anyone

Oh wow that's a huge day range. I get that frustration, especially when you are trying for a method that requires a certain timing vs just when to try in general. FXed for you!

Re pain it's better but still can't be up on my feet too much. Walking is better but still not enough to where I'd feel comfortable walking the dogs. It's when I stand still too long or sit too long that I start to get the shakes. Earliest PT is Wednesday, so hopefully he can give me some advice on what I can do or shouldn't do and some exercises to start slowly strengthening my back again. I feel, but it's also just starting to feel numb and weak.

AFM not much news. Same old, same old. TB wanted to DTD and I'm too broken lol. Had dinner with my family for my brother's birthday indoor dining! So nice to be able to actually go and eat at our usual restaurant for once as a whole family since the pandemic hit. Esp because I was craving their food a lot for the past couple months but it's far away and kinda pricey so not really something I'd get for myself. A slept in his bed for the time last night! He slept through no issues, but I kept having anxiety and woke up like 9x hahaha. But I converted his bed to a full and he was watching me put the boxspring and mattress in. Got him a Frozen 2 bedspread cuz the room is blue and I don't wanna repaint/he loves Frozen. His dad would die if he knew because "Frozen is for girls" insert eye roll. And yes most of the spreads were obnoxiously pink and they all feature Anna and Elsa or Olaf (I can't stand Olaf lol), but this one is mostly blue with deep reds. So fits with the room enough even though it's still very clearly an ocean themed room hahahaha