General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[Flueky88]

Hello guys. Sorry been mostly lurking.


Dobby I hope you get to feeling better soon. It was from working out to hard from my PT exercises (lunges, heel bounces, and some "bird " thing) my PT recommended some Calm magnesium powder. I also did an Epsom salt bath too. Anyways hope you get relief soon.

Glad A is doing well in his room. V has Frozen bedding too

Pretty have you been losing weight? I noticed that O was sooner in my cycles when I weighed less (and wasn't get regular post bcp).

Shae I'm wondering if it's so strict about renting because of the landlords not being able to evict others out due to not paying rent? That would be my thinking that they are ensuring they have paying renters. Anyways, sorry they require such a large income.

 

[DobbyForever]

Thanks Fluek! Hope you’re doing well even if you are busy. Good to hear from you! I had planned to do an epsom bath, so a week later it hasn’t happened I may do one today. I have to do my report cards this weekend, and i really hurt my back working on them yesterday.

Frozen is the way to go!

A tried to come to my bed last night and it broke my heart to put him back in his bed. if it was an I’m scared situation I would have let him stay, but I’m noticing if I use my usual sink to brush my teeth and wash my face it wakes him up even if the door is closed. Gonna try doing it in the bathroom instead tonight. But I ended up falling asleep at like 2 from the guilt and anxiety. So tired

 

[shaescott]

Pretty yay for the daycare opening up but I’m sorry about the early unexpected peak. Wanna lend me some CD14 LH surges? I would say my eating isn’t much better because I’ve been running around most days. But I’ve been trying to make sure I get *something* in me at the start of my day. Caffeine wise, I’m writing this with an iced coffee next to me so you can see how that’s going lol.

Dobs I actually do have a student credit card, I got it my freshman year.

That’s too bad re: James Franco. Great actor, but sadly that doesn’t always reflect their personality. I’ve never met a celebrity, which is fairly normal for someone who lives in rural/suburban New England lol.

I’m glad you got to go out to eat with the fam. Is your mom still with your stepdad?

That’s great that A slept fine on his own. I’m sorry you’re having anxiety about it. Screw his dad, if he loves Frozen, he gets a frozen bedspread. It’s not like it’s bright pink, though even if it was, if he loved it, I don’t see an issue with it. I wouldn’t pick a pink one myself for a boy, but if my kid picked it out and loved the pink one, then they can have the pink one.

Flueks long time no see! It makes sense that it would be about not being able to evict these days. Still crazy to me, but I get that they’re trying to protect themselves.

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae girl then ditch that debit card! Lol jk do what works for you.

I think you asked once and I didn’t respond my bad. My brain sucks. she filed and her responded. Courts are still backed up rn. They’re still living together in different rooms cuz he hasn’t kicked out the tenants from their other house yet

and yeah for sure I’m not mad about pink cuz he’s a boy I just hate pink in general lol. If I had a girl though in my condo I’d probably two tone her wall but instead of dark blue and light blue maybe a deep red and a gentle pink. But that’s really about as much pink as I can stand

and yeah lol I haven’t seen any celebs outside of LA or Vegas but saw a lot at UCLA. Enough for a lifetime.

how are you? Where are things in your cycle? Hopefully that nursing board stuff comes through soon unless it came through. My brain is sCrAmBlEd

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I use both the debit and credit card but I really only use the credit card occasionally for gas or if my parents ask me to pick up food for everyone and they’ll pay me back, I don’t always have enough money in my account for sushi takeout for 4 lol.

Has it been really tense between them, still living together and all?

I feel like light blue can be girly if it’s light enough and surrounded by more girly decor. Or there’s always wallpaper, you could get a girly pattern. No matter the gender of my kids I really want to do a forest wall where the crib would go and then a very light neutral color on the other walls, so it’s like an accent wall. SO and I are super into woodsy stuff.

Kinda like this but with a different background color and less of the falling leaves:


I also want a wall decal or painting like this for a boy:

And like this for a girl:


Going along with the woodsy theme, I’m super into this as a pregnancy announcement, we like to go hiking and all that jazz:


Anyway. Cycle-wise, I’m on CD4, still on my period. I somehow managed to forget to temp the past 2 days, oops, but at least it’s not important days. I’m still waiting on the board of nursing, and I very well could be waiting for the next few weeks.

Sorry your brain is scrambled

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Flueky - Good to hear from you. No major weight loss here. Just keep fluctuating up and down a few pounds.

Dobby - Alex loves Frozen too. Haven't had him ask for Frozen merch though. lol. And the mom guilt is real. Sometimes, if we have one of the kids in the king with us, I feel a little guilty that the other is sleeping alone. But they're too young and asleep to care. haha
Sorry you have to wait til Wednesday to see a PT, but hopefully they'll be able to help you.

shae - You can have all my early O's. lol

Re: James Franco/celebrities. That's too bad that he's a dick, but also not totally surprising. I haven't met a lot of famous people, and the ones I have, I've just dealt with for a minute or so. I've met Avril Lavigne twice, Kesha once (and, last I knew, she follows me on Twitter), a couple guys from SUM41 and Simple Plan, and a bunch from ComiCons (Christopher Lloyd, Ron Perlman, a couple actors from Bones, Firefly, and Star Trek:TNG).

Re: Decorating. If I get the opportunity to decorate a girls room, I'll probably be super cliche with pink and/or purple. But with dark furniture.

AF, tested one more time after my last post and it was even lower. So, now I'm just waiting to see if AF comes early or if I'll still be having 32 day cycles. If it does come early, that would probably move my EDD to the middle of March, so I may just wait another cycle. I also had a friend tell me she noticed that after she got her first Covid shot, her period was kinda late and she got more cramping than usual. Shae and Dobby, did you experience that? She got Pfizer. I'm getting my first shot on June 5th and AF is due June 14th, so we'll see.

 

[shaescott]

Pretty after the shot I ovulated a bit late so my cycle was longer. I can’t say if it was from the shot or not considering last cycle was also long w/ delayed ovulation so it’s hard to know. I know some people have had weird periods after it, often bleeding longer than usual. I didn’t experience that, and I didn’t have extra cramping that I can remember.

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae, Lol I feel you. That’s a good balance of use. We just don’t like debit cards in my family because it doesn’t build credit plus that whole it’s tied to your money. Like it’s great it worked out with getting your money back, but that’s not always the case or it takes a long time sometimes.

Those are all cute! I’m more of a paint vs wallpaper person. Love the woodland theme though!

I wouldn’t say tense just annoying. My stepdad doesn’t want to give her anything or pay alimony, so he’s trying to manipulate everyone. Which like hey I’ll take the perks but it’s not working lol cuz I’m not stupid. My mom is being stupid though and not listening to the attorney. So quite frankly she deserves to get f*ed over at this point. And what annoys me is that even if it doesn’t matter to her, that’s stuff that ultimately can help A and me. So like be nice if you cared a little more. Eye roll but also her life, her money. Plus on principle he shouldn’t get to screw her over.

Pretty, yeah A will definitely ask for merch for frozen, lion king, black panther, or trolls. I didn’t officially give him choices for the bed because I don’t want to repaint the room and I know he loves frozen the most anyway.

my back is feeling better. Still hurts but not brought to tears so I’m feeling more optimistic. Hoping to see the boy next weekend. The tension is palpable lol

yeah he kind of looks like a guy who would be an ass haha. But that’s quite the list! I’d say the only celebs I’ve ever had legit conversation/time with is the cast of bbt and LeVar Burton.

thats would be a cute color combo! Hope you get your girl when you try!

Re Pfizer: I had already started bcp so can’t speak to it affecting my menstruation unfortunately. Nothing seemed different with my withdrawal bleeds either.

ETA I deleted my dating profile. I’m just feeling really fatigued. My friend is dating a guy that I think she’ll marry based on their personalities, and it’s just sad. Sad in the sense that like she’s compromising so much and so willing to overlook that he’s lying about a criminal offense just to get married again and have more kids. And I don’t want that. I don’t want to settle again. And I’m just not finding anyone that I even want to go out with. And I think I need to stop sleeping with TB. I’m just tired. I gave it an honest effort.

Also realized between gas and copays, A’s therapies are costing me $500/month. My mom just loaned me $4k, and I have no clue when or how I’m going to pay her back. I’m just hoping at this point that my stepdad can get that from the car accident.

And A can open the gate in the backyard now, so we had to put combination locks on both of them. And he’s starting to cry and go into my bed and he looks so defeated when I put him back in his bed. I just want to go back to cosleeping.

Im so far behind on my report cards because it hurts to sit up to work on them and I can’t focus with the pain even if I take 3-4 aleve 30m before I start working.

I’m just a bag of poo today. I can’t remember the last time I cried this much sober

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I assume you mean you prefer paint as in a solid color, but we very well may paint the woodland scene because of how expensive wallpaper is. If we f*ck it up, we can always just let it dry and then paint over it with a solid color. It’s also very dependent on where we’re living when we have our first kid. Generally you can’t paint an apartment wall like that, as far as I know.

Sorry about the annoyingness of the pending divorce. I don’t know why she wouldn’t listen to her attorney, it’s kind of their job to know the smartest way to approach that stuff. Although I can understand if she’s very stubborn and truly disagrees with the attorney. Just frustrating.

That’s too bad about your friend. It’s bad enough he has a record, but lying about it is straight up not okay in a relationship. If he was honest about it then maybe depending on the offense and his explanation, it could be a non-issue for her. But lying about it? It’s a no from me. Sorry about your difficulties finding anyone you’re interested in on the dating site. I do worry about you being so attached to The Boy with no sign of commitment on his end. I know some people can have sex with no feelings, but I don’t think you can have sex with *him* without falling even more for him, not at this point. But what you do is always up to you and we’ll support you through whatever you choose.

Yikes re: cost of therapies. I have a lot of opinions about the American healthcare system and I’m not going to do a super long ranty soap box because I don’t want to cause huge arguments, so I’ll just say that I don’t think you should have to pay for medical/PT/OT/behavioral/speech/psych etc therapies at all, let alone when it’s for a child. People are drowning in the cost of healthcare, insured or not.
Anyway, I hope you can get that money back from the accident. Also that’s stressful that A can open the gate now, good thing you realized quickly and put a lock on it. Kids are crazy fast.

I’m sorry you and A are struggling with the separate rooms situation. My mom said when she was sleep training me she’d sit outside my room and silently cry because I was crying and she felt so terrible. Luckily, it only took about 5 days for me to self soothe near instantly. But I was only 6 months old. She did it with my sister at a much older age and she struggled a lot more with it, it took much longer. She did succeed, though. A may just need more time than what you’d expect since he’s older and has autism. Those both will affect it a significantly. A change in routine is a lot for any kid, let alone a kid like A. But he’ll get through it.

I’m so sorry you’re having so much pain just sitting up. That’s terrible. I really hope the PT you have coming up will help.


AFM still no news from the BON, I swear I checked if my status had changed 4+ times today. Yesterday I saw on FB that one of my classmates has already taken and passed the NCLEX AND she just got engaged. Also, one of SO’s friends is engaged and his fiancée is pregnant. I got very jealous and very salty with SO as a result. Oops. We’re good though, we talked and he reassured me etc.

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae sending hugs. So sorry the board is moving so slowly! I’m glad SO understands where you’re coming from, and as frustrating as it is that everyone seems to be moving at turtle speed I’m glad he’s not caving and planning to keep all of your plans sacred and special.

We’re all just in a funk. I’ll be better once school is out and A’s birthday comes and goes.

Re boy, the infatuation phase is over. I definitely don’t love him nor do I feel myself falling in love with him anymore. But that impacts the sex. And honestly it served it’s purpose. I’m over my sexual trauma now. It was fun while it lasted but like idk. Like with my birthday coming up and that’s six months of us messing around, like I want bday sex but I deserve more than to be somebody’s booty call on my own birthday. Plus he said himself that after last month things are work we’re supposed to go back to normal and he’d have more time and be happier again. But it’s two weeks later and I don’t seem him making any moves to go back to a dating relationship. So sure he meets my logistical needs, but I didn’t settle for the guys who met my emotional needs so I’m not going to sit here and settle for him. Easy to say now because all this depression has killed my sex drive. Lol

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Dobby - Glad to hear that you're looking to move on from TB. Take however much time you need to get in a better mental space before putting yourself back out there. Maybe it'll be one of those things where you swear off guys or give up and then meet Prince Charming on the most random way. Either way, just focus on other things and the romance will come.
Sorry to hear you're still in so much pain. Keeping my FX that the PT can give you some helpful advice or exercises.
And some people just can't be helped. There are times to take professional advice with a grain of salt, but why someone would not listen to a lawyer during a divorce case is beyond me. As you said, it's her life and money, but still. Hopefully he can still get you a decent settlement.
I fully get wanting to train A to sleep in his own bed, but is there any harm in continuing to cosleep? We don't really have this issue with either kid, but I know one day they won't want to snuggle in bed anymore, so I'm inclined to let them sleep with us here and there if they want.

shae - It's tough when people are "ahead" of you, both personally and professionally. But you know there's light at the end of the tunnel. Your approval and proposal and cute LOs will come soon. Patience sucks, but at least you have use to vent to. lol

AFM, the boys are home from daycare again cuz Alex apparently had a stuffed nose, wouldn't settle for nap time, and then woke up with watery eyes and a cough. The only symptom I saw was the sniffles at bedtime. More than likely it's allergies or something, but we're getting him tested tomorrow afternoon. Hopefully the results come back in time to get them back to daycare by Monday, at the latest.
Been super tired from work lately, but the weight continues to drop slowly, so it's all good.
I can't recall if SO has used "IF" to describe baby 3 since my last post, but tonight he refered to Alex's room as "the room you intend for them to share." So, as Olaf would say "all good things, all good things." lol
And I'm anxiously awaiting my first dose this Saturday.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Oh, and Happy belated Birthday to V, Flueky.

 

[DobbyForever]

Edit to delete my long rant. Cried all day and called a family meeting. We managed to hash out a contingency plan for what happens if A does not do well in the new room that allows me to not sell or move for now. I'm physically and emotionally drained. Will read and catch up tom

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I’m glad to hear that you’ve moved on emotionally from TB. I missed your long rant but I’m glad you figured out a plan with your family.

Pretty that’s too bad about Alex having the sniffles, I hope it’s just allergies like you said. My allergies this year have been awful so I wouldn’t be surprised. Good to hear that SO seems to be on board!

AFM nothing much going on here. Still waiting for the BON to authorize me for the NCLEX. I should really start going through my bedroom and bagging up stuff I don’t need/use, I’ve been sitting around or hanging out with SO most of the time.

ETA: I tried to get last safe day BD and SO was tired and grumpy so it didn’t happen so now my chances are down to diaphragm failure, even if I ovulated early. Ah well.

 

[DobbyForever]

Sorry Shae. Hopefully things come through soon. Is there anyone you can call or email? Did I ask already? My brain is scrambled. And sorry about the bd. Misery loves company so I’m right there with you with the simultaneous baby fever but logic brain/timing/life.

Hope everyone is doing well

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I read that after 4 weeks it’s a good idea to call just to make sure they’re not missing anything from you. It’ll be 3 weeks on Monday, so I’m giving it a bit more time. You can’t call just for your application status though, they put that in all caps on the application. I know other people from my school who are still waiting so I’m not worried yet, just annoyed and impatient. I wanted to jump right into taking it with the material fresh in my brain. Now I actually have to go back and review because I haven’t been in class in a month.

Glad to have company in my misery, but sorry you are also experiencing the misery. Our time will come, and we’ll be better prepared for it when it happens. I just learned that while non-folic acid forms of folate are touted as bioavailable and easier absorbed than the folic acid form, there’s no studies showing that any form of folate other than folic acid actually prevents neural tube defects. Here I was taking a prenatal with a different form of folate thinking that was better, but turns out, maybe not. So I just switched back to a folic acid prenatal, it has 800 mcg so even if I don’t absorb it as well due to my one variant in the MTHFR gene I’ll still get at least the minimum 400 mcg absorbed, so it’s all good. Just annoyed because the other vitamins were gummies and so easy to chew and I couldn’t find any other gummies that used folic acid that had enough of the other nutrients I was looking for, so I’m back to the horse pills lol. Anyway, point is, I’m glad I found this out before getting pregnant, and every month I don’t get pregnant is another month where I could learn something very important about preventative care or other important info that is time sensitive during pregnancy. I’d been taking the other form of folate for months, so I’m glad I didn’t get pregnant during them, if my baby had a neural tube defect and then I found out about the folic acid thing I’d be so upset with myself. So yeah, all’s well that ends well.

Sending love to you and A and your family. I’m sorry you’ve been feeling so scrambled. I hope it gets better soon

 

[Flueky88]

Pretty hope Alex is feeling better. S got q runny nose yesterday and a slight fever. She's acting okay, she went with me and V to Vs checked up so thinking she caught a bug from Dr office. Also, glad SO seems pretty receptive to #3! You are hoping to try this month?

Shae I think it took right around a month to get my approval from TN BON. Sorry you will have to review. I'm not sure if your state's test differs much from mine, but best of luck and try to remain calm. Trust your gut, don't change your answer unless you are 100% without a doubt sure. I don't typically get tested anxiety but I sure did for the NCLEX. I was lucky mine cut off at minimum # of questions so I left thinking I either aced it or bombed it.

Dobby sorry things are stressful and having baby fever. Baby fever is a tough thing and I really have no idea how to get rid of that feeling. Glad that you don't feel attached to TB.

AFM depending on weather and contractors. We have a possibility of moving at the end of the month. I'm soooo ready!! Things have felt a bit tense with step MIL. I've come to realize that she doesn't feel the same about my girls compared to her biological grandchildren, especially her oldest grandson. It's hurt me a lot, but I know they are blesses to have my mom as a grandmother because she would do anything for them.

Work is busy as usual. V had her check up Tuesday and had slight issue with her vaccines. Pretty sure it was mainly varicella. She spiked a fever and was sore in both legs so much that she didn't want to walk. She actually asked to go to bed the first night. She's back to her usual self. She is super tall, 43 3/4in tall and that puts her in 99th %. She was 42 lbs I believe and put her in 90th. Hoping she'll qualify for preK because it would be beneficial to her I believe. S has been working on her 2nd year molars. E is doing pretty well. She's nursing every 4 hours at night most nights. I'm so looking forward to longer stretches. I think part of it is her sleeping in our room. Once we get moved, I'll move her into her nursery.

 

[shaescott]

Flueks that’s good to know, hopefully mine doesn’t take more than 4 weeks. Time is of the essence especially since we need to apply for apartments and I can’t do that without a pay stub. Fingers crossed. I definitely get anxious before, during, and after exams, but not to the point that I do poorly because I was anxious.

Fingers crossed you get to move before July! That’s terrible about your step MIL. I’m glad your mom makes up for it by loving on your girls. Sorry V didn’t feel well after her vaccine, but glad she’s back to her usual self. It’s crazy how some people have bad reactions and others have none, like the COVID vaccine just gave me a headache right after and my dad had body aches and fatigue and everything. Anyway, V is so crazy tall, wow! Just like her mom and dad, huh? I bet she’ll be 4 feet tall by the end of kindergarten at this rate! I hope she’ll be happy about her increased ability to reach things on top shelves rather than upset about being taller than her peers, poor SO has to ask me to get things that are really high sometimes because he’s short and I’m tall. It makes life easier for me to not need help to reach things at the grocery store. Anyway, hopefully S is doing okay with her teeth coming in and E will have an easy transition when you move!


AFM I did a naughty thing I was wondering how it would affect my birth control app if I deleted my shorter cycles from before the IUD was taken out, like if I would get more safe days, because at the moment it’s giving me quite excessive leeway based on my O days since the IUD was removed. So I (impulsively) removed that data, and it didn’t affect this cycle at all, but next cycle it gives me an extra day, and the next cycle it gives me another, and it tops out there at safe through CD12 rather than CD10. Should I have done that? Mmm no. But to my credit, my cycles have been different since the IUD was removed and I didn’t remove any data from that point on, everything from the start of January is in there and accurate. Buuuut let’s be real, I’m hoping I’ll get lucky and have a shorter cycle. Honestly, considering how much SO is working and how variable his sex drive is, it’s more likely that I’ll have a shorter cycle with no viable BD and the app will notice and reduce my safe days. Especially considering I couldn’t get CD10 BD this cycle when I literally spent the night with him. I can’t really be mad, he was exhausted and he’s allowed to be too tired or too stressed or too busy. I just wish it happened less (so that it happened more).

 

[shaescott]

PFFFFTTTT God said “I think the f*ck not” cuz my LH is elevated today and I’m only CD14 so I guess this cycle will be the one where I ovulate early with no viable BD I thought my cervix was oddly high for this part of my cycle but it fluctuates so I was like “whatever”. If I’d BD’d on CD10 I very well could’ve gotten pregnant. Frickin rude of my body to do this

 

[shaescott]

Just got my ATT and scheduled my NCLEX for Monday, also got my temporary license issued! I am incredibly anxious