not actively trying since I've had four MC's
we just moved to new state so trying to settle. Will be looking for part-time work and will see what transpires hope everything goes well for you...
Doing good
I love these groups because sometimes I DO feel like I'm the only one in this situation. We are in our 2nd cycle of TTC and right around ovulation I will turn 41. It does feel like it won't happen, which is why I love reading about those that do get a BFP
Ladies...I'm 41...please don't give up hope...keep trying to reach your dreams...it can and does work!!!
I'll be 41 in less than 2 weeks and can definately hear that clock ticking now... so today my husband got sick of not having his dinner cause i was busy with my "research" he gave me his credit card and begged me to go buy a hpt I hesitated for a whole 4 seconds and then was peeling out of the driveway heading to the pharmacy where i would spend the next hour reading every box for the one that would give me the answer...let me rephrase that find one that would give me the answer I wanted...... hmmm ended up closing my eys and grabbing one so I got the cvs early stick..... No here I sit with the stick studying yet another "exam 
I see the thinnest of faintest lines my dh sees it but he says that is way to faint try again in a couple days!!......WHAT!?!? NO I want my answer NOW i cannot wait more days it's bad enough I think my af is is late by 1 day but that i am not even sure of cause i ov almost 5-6 days later than i should have so now i don't really know when af will show up but i would rather face her then another BFN!!! So not sure what to do with myself now I have looked at every internet site at least 4 x's each i know cause my computer actually keeps track and tells me...
I have 1 test left in the box and I will probably use that with fmu and see how that goes but on a bright note I do have a regular dr appt for my yearly pap on tues the 7th so maybe i will get some answers there if I don't get them sooner... I do know that this constant burping is still keeping hope alive as I NEVER and I mean NEVER BURP and about a week ago it started with a couple a day and now it has gotten to dozens of times and hour so that to me is my one sign that is keeping me from throwing in the towel.... and accepting that af will be here any day NOPE this burping is my one salvation never thought i would be so grateful to burp this much it has gotten so bad my dh has even mentioned it... thanks for letting me rant!!well I have become an internet stalking obssessive fruitcake!! every single symptom and there are all of maybe 5 symptoms I have looked into each one with hours and I mean HOURS of internet searches and where has it got me...? a dirty house and not a single answer closer than i was 2 weeks ago!! LOL... I stopped taking hpt's cause it was getting me more depressed so i just focused on feeling my cervix every single night then searching the internet for answers to my "findings" I have kept a journal of every single pain, cramp, cm whatever and I then go back like I am researching for some big paper or something!!.. I need serious help!!
no AF for me yet....??????? wait and see for me... getting a bit jaded now... 
yeah let me work on it it took me almost an hour just to find my post again! LOL... So i am trying to figure this whole mess out my last af was 7/7 I am usually 28 sometimes 29 days to the day!!! never late never early!! I should have ovulated around 16-19 but my sticks and cm calculate 24-26 and those days were DARK!!!! CM came on the first day so we bd 3 days before those days , during and 3 days after .. my af should have been due on the 4th but since i ovulated late I am techinally "approx" 9-10dpo so maybe thats why the line is so faint? still no sign of af I have a bit of middle lower cramps normall they start hurting on sides a couple days before af comes...this morning i woke up again to my nipples on FIRE!! and another strange dream but the bbs are SORE they are usuall before af but this is a bit worse, i think, it is more on sides of bbs and onder nipples sorry for all the tmi... but i am stumped honestly the burping is still going strong if not getting worse and i suck at burping if i drink a soda and need to burp i have to pat my back or chest to get it out i just never burp and no i sound like a truck driver!!;0 ...LOL... i am downloading pic now let me know what you think and fingers crossed for my doctor appt tommorrow i will keep everyone updated incase you ever have the same situation...
hpt =
Where is the picture?yeah let me work on it it took me almost an hour just to find my post again! LOL... So i am trying to figure this whole mess out my last af was 7/7 I am usually 28 sometimes 29 days to the day!!! never late never early!! I should have ovulated around 16-19 but my sticks and cm calculate 24-26 and those days were DARK!!!! CM came on the first day so we bd 3 days before those days , during and 3 days after .. my af should have been due on the 4th but since i ovulated late I am techinally "approx" 9-10dpo so maybe thats why the line is so faint? still no sign of af I have a bit of middle lower cramps normall they start hurting on sides a couple days before af comes...this morning i woke up again to my nipples on FIRE!! and another strange dream but the bbs are SORE they are usuall before af but this is a bit worse, i think, it is more on sides of bbs and onder nipples sorry for all the tmi... but i am stumped honestly the burping is still going strong if not getting worse and i suck at burping if i drink a soda and need to burp i have to pat my back or chest to get it out i just never burp and no i sound like a truck driver!!;0 ...LOL... i am downloading pic now let me know what you think and fingers crossed for my doctor appt tommorrow i will keep everyone updated incase you ever have the same situation...
I think I see something...
hpt =
Highly confusing ... Is it bfn or BFP? Sorry but the ticker on your signature has me wondering hehehe
if that makes any sense..lol... the bbs hurt at night and through the night actually has been waking me up that has never happened but around lunch time the pain is much milder maybe cause i took bra off idk.. but some times i feel pg then sometimes i run to bathroom and EXPECT to see af it is all just confusing i read somewhere that some symptoms we make happen cause we want it so bad so when my bbs hurt i prod poke pinch everything cause i am wondering am i making them hurt or do they really hurt? the big thing is I have only 1 tube so in my mind I think no way in heck will it ever happen for me I have a 5 year old and it took me 18 very long long years to have him!! I had 2 badly scarred tubes so I met his father one day and was finale happy was all set in my mind not having anymore kids ( i have a 2 when i was 17and 18 and at that age you don't appreciate being a mom i rushed it through wanted them to hurry and grow up so i could have a life little did i know the life i wfanted i already had) so i was finale content my daughter had just come home from the hospital with my lil grandson and just on a co-worker mentioning that my af comes a week before hers and she got over hers a week prior I thought hmmm no way I had only been with my then bf for 6 months and yes BFP!! I alomst had a nervous break down!! NO JOKE!!!! my dh has 14 siblings and they all have multiple kids so I think he must have some great swimming genes!! then my son was 6 months old i got pg AGAIN!! wow but i knew something was wrong long story short i had and eptopic went in for surgery and they found the other pg in other tube lucky for me though i only had to lose 1 tube! i fell sad for along time over that and didn't want to have any more pg where something would go wrong but a few months ago I realized I am 42 I have a 5 yr old and this is my last chance i wouldn't want to have one to late just because my body is tired and i think a pregnancy would hurt me to much.. with my son I had to use a walker to get to the bathroom at night my hips hurt so bad! and let me tell you if a growing bump might turn a dh off try let him see u using a walker sex doesnt' look all that exciting to him then!! LMAO! sorry for going on and on I am just really going batty and don't really have anyone to talk to my dh won't get his hopes up so he won't talk about it till i am a few months along if i try to bring it up he just brushes me off i know he was hurt to and that is how he handles it but i just feel confused and alone! so I do appreciate all the posts and answers and support really i do I just wish i knew and I was sure i wasn't going to lose another hopefully though tommorrow my doctor will have good news... yes i do see a very thin faint line but because it is sooo thin is that a + or something else and i took the 2nd one in the box and got almost the same thing except it was actually lighter i could only see it outside... so does that mean neg or the fact that i am only technically around 10dpo give or take a day even though af is 2 days late cause i ov very late... UGH!! why do i do this to myself although i have never gotten this out hand!!
